Curse of the Ninjatube
Disclaimer: Don't own Naruto, Youtube, the song "Emo Kid," or the video "Let's get some shoes." We just own the idea…
Just so nobody feels bad about this, we (my sister and I) do love the characters of Naruto, but this idea came to mind and we couldn't not write it out.
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It was a beautiful morning in Konoha; so beautiful that one Sakura Haruno could not help but go outside to enjoy it. She was walking through the streets of the village, a smile on her face, her long, shiny pink hair swaying in the breeze. And all of a sudden she was flat on her face in the dirt and someone really heavy was on top of her…She had just been run over. Coughing, because she had inhaled a particularly big ant, Sakura sat up. Shizune was sitting on the ground next to her, looking frazzled.
"Hello Shizune," Sakura greeted with a smile.
"Oh my God, she's gonna kill me!!" Shizune shrieked, her eye twitching.
Sakura looked puzzled. "Who's going to kill you? Why?"
"Tsunade-sama…I was supposed to bring her this sake half an hour ago, but I got held up. She's going to go nuts!" Shizune groaned in dismay. "But I still have so many errands to run…Sakura, do you think you could bring it to her?" Being a capable young kunoichi, Sakura nodded. "Oh, bless you!!" Shizune said, handing her a large bottle of sake. Sakura climbed to her feet and brushed herself off before heading towards Hokage tower. When she arrived and knocked on the door, Tsunade told her to enter. Sakura stepped into Tsunade's office to see her watching a video. Tsunade was guzzling on chocolate truffles, and had a box of Kleenex next to her. Her makeup was smeared due to the fact she had been bawling her eyes out all morning. She looked up when Sakura entered, saw the bottle in her hands, and immediately snatched it.
"Tsunade-sama, Shizune told me to give it to you," Sakura said. Tsunade unscrewed the cap and took a large swig before wiping her mouth.
"Thank you, Sakura," she said, sniffling.
"Tsunade-sama, are you alright?" Sakura asked her, eyebrows furrowing.
"Yes, I'm fine…It's just…today's the anniversary of when our team joined all those years ago. It was so much fun back then; me, Jiraiya, and Orochimaru. And look how far we've grown apart now." She reached for another tissue and blew her nose loudly. "Thankfully, I still have these home videos to remind me of the old days."
Sakura screwed up her face in thought. That gave her an idea…She left Tsunade's office and went to the bridge where Team 7 would meet every morning. A few minutes later Sasuke trudged up to her, hands in his pockets. (He had recently started biting his nails, and he didn't want anyone to know he had such a weird habit so he just hid them from view all the time).
"Hi Sasuke," she greeted, batting her eyelashes at him flirtatiously. He grunted in return and leant against the railing. Sakura, feeling another awkward silence arising between her and Sasuke, tried to make small talk. "It's a beautiful day today, don't you think?" Sasuke didn't say anything in return. "The birds are chirping, the flowers are in bloom, the sun is shining—"
"I hate the sun," he interrupted, glaring at her darkly. Sakura swallowed nervously and looked away, her hands fiddling with a strand of her hair.
"Knowing Naruto, he'll probably be late as always," she said, huffing. "And he'll show up here looking like a complete mess, just like always, that idiot."
Sasuke didn't say anything, though he silently thought about pointing out the fact that Sakura didn't look that great either. He was instead distracted by the dust cloud in the near distance. Sakura sighed in annoyance and rolled her eyes as she realized the cloud of dust was the swiftly approaching Naruto. A few minutes later he had skidded to a halt in front of them, sending dust into the air and making Sakura cough. (There had been an ant flying around in that dust, and she had just happened to swallow it).
"Hey guys, sorry I'm late," Naruto said, beaming at them like an idiot.
"Of course you were late. You were too busy eating ramen to bother coming on time," Sakura snapped, placing her hands on her hips.
"Yeah, well that's cause I had this coupon and it was gonna expire today!! Sakura, I had to use it!! It would be a total waste if I didn't!!"
"What coupon?" Sakura snapped. Naruto pulled it from his pocket. "They actually let you keep it?" she asked him.
"Well, the ramen was so good I wanted to save it to remember. So he just stamped it." Sakura looked at the tattered, water-stained, and stamped coupon. She squinted her eyes at some small print on the bottom.
"Naruto you idiot…This coupon expires today next year."
"WHAT??" He quickly snatched the coupon from her hands and looked at it closely, disbelief coloring his face. Then he sunk to the ground, tears in his eyes.
"Tch, annoying," Sasuke muttered, looking off into the distance; his attention was firmly held by the little boy who tripped and fell flat on his face.
"Yo." The three tweens quickly turned around to see Kakashi perched on Sasuke's head.
"You're late!" Naruto yelled, pointing at his sensei and completely forgetting about the coupon.
"Sensei! Get off of Sasuke-kun's precious head!" Sakura yelled. Kakashi looked down to see that he was in fact squatting on top of his pessimistic student's head.
"Precious? His hair looks like a chicken cut off its butt and stuck it on his head!!" Naruto screeched, and Sakura glared at him.
"So sorry, thought it was the bridge," Kakashi said, jumping off and actually landing on the bridge this time.
"Sasuke's head is so big it could be the bridge," Naruto mumbled to himself, looking down at the river below them.
"Tch, idiot," Sasuke said. When he had said this, Sasuke was once again looking off to the distance at a birds' nest where the mother bird was teaching her babies how to fly. He watched as she pushed one out of the nest, and it immediately fell to the ground and died. Seeing the mother bird get ready to push another one out, Sasuke felt a twinge of excitement and dark amusement.
"You know what, why don't we skip training today? We can go out and eat ramen instead."
Sakura stared at Kakashi like he had grown another head. "Are you serious?" Sasuke looked fairly put-out that he wasn't going to get to beat Naruto up. And the obnoxious blonde himself was jumping up and down in excitement.
"Do you mean it, Kakashi-sensei?"
"Would I ever lie to you, Naruto?" Kakashi said, his eye crinkling in amusement.
"Naruto, you just had ramen like half an hour ago," Sakura retorted. "You don't need anymore!"
"That's blasphemy, Sakura…You're going to Hell now."
"Do you even know what that word means?" Sakura snapped.
Sasuke just sighed and crossed his arms over his chest, a grumpy look on his face. "Come on, everyone. Let's go get some ramen," Kakashi insisted. Naruto didn't need to be told twice and took off running. Sasuke grumbled to himself and pushed off of the bridge, trudging after him.
"Kakashi-sensei, did you hit your head or something?" Sakura asked him. "Why would you suddenly decide to skip training?"
"I love spending time with you three, and I want you to all cherish your childhoods while you can?" Sakura didn't believe him and quirked an eyebrow. "And I got a new volume of Icha Icha today."
Even though what Kakashi had said was just an excuse to read his latest book of porn, Sakura noted that it had also given her an idea. Walking fast so she could catch up with her other team mates, Sakura smiled at them.
"Why are you smiling Sakura-chan?" Naruto asked, noting that she was in fact smiling more than she normally did.
"Have you guys ever noticed that we never cherish our moments together as a team?" Sakura asked, waiting for an answer which none of the boys gave. "Well we don't, so I think we should start video tapping moments we have like missions so that later on when we're all older, we can look back on these days," she finished for them. Both of the boys looked at her and there was silence, except for the people walking around them, the sounds of nature, and Kakashi giggling in the background while reading his pornography.
"Where are we going to get a video camera?" Sasuke finally spoke up irritably.
"I could get one from Jiraiya-sama. He's carrying it around with him all the time," Naruto said, smiling. For once, Sakura smiled back. The three of them fell back into silence once again as they walked towards the ramen stand. Attempting to impress Sasuke, Sakura held her chin up high, stuck out her non-existent chest, and attempted to sway her hips seductively.
"Watch out for that pole," Naruto warned her and Sakura quickly side stepped it.
"Thank you, Naruto," she said, looking back over her shoulder at him…and missing the rock right in front of her. Sakura tripped on it and went sprawling to the ground.
"Tch, stupid," Sasuke said, this time actually paying attention to what was going on with his team mates.
"Wish I had had the video camera for that one!" Naruto said, laughing while Sakura sat up and dusted herself off. Once she was clean, she raised her fist and stalked towards Naruto.
"I'm sorry Sakura-chan! I was only kidding!" Naruto tried to defend himself, backing away from his angry team mate.
"No need to fight, we're finally here," Kakashi announced just as Naruto was about to get a fist full of pain.
"Ramen!" Naruto cried happily before running towards the stand.
"Tch, idiot," Sasuke said, following suit since he really didn't have anything better to do. It wasn't like he had a family to hang with since his whole clan was dead and nobody liked him much because he couldn't carry a decent conversation. Sakura sighed, knowing that she had once again missed the opportunity to talk to her beloved Sasuke alone.
Just as they were sitting down Shizune popped out of nowhere. "Kakashi-san, Tsunade-sama requests you and your team's presence in her office right away," she said. Sakura studied Shizune as she stood there and noted that she looked like she had gotten hit with something ugly. She shook her head sadly; poor Shizune.
"Thank you for informing me," Kakashi said before Shizune was off to do more chores for Tsunade. Face still buried in his book, Kakashi got up and left the ramen stand, Sasuke trailing after him like a lost puppy…or an annoying flea on a lost puppy.
"Come on Naruto, we have to go," Sakura said, watching as Sasuke and Kakashi began to walk away.
"But I'm only on my third bowl!" Naruto whined, gesturing towards the two empty bowls next to him.
"You idiot! Come on!" Sakura yelled, grabbing him by the arm and yanking him up.
"Put it on my tab!" Naruto yelled before being whisked away by his team mate.
"Sure thing Naruto," the manager sighed, marking it down. He blinked when he added the figures up; Naruto owed him over 4,000 for all the ramen he ate.
It took a while for Sakura and Naruto to finally catch up with their team mates, but when they did, Naruto went straight into complaining. "Kakashi-sensei, you promised us ramen! I only got to eat threebowls!"
"We were called in for a mission which, by many standards, is more important than ramen, which you have had enough of," Kakashi said, a look of seriousness upon what part of his face they could see.
"What does the old lady need us for? She can get any other team that isn'tin the process of eating ramen," Naruto said, crossing his arms. He then began to pout.
"Naruto, she assigned us specifically to this mission." Kakashi grinned deviously beneath his mask. "It must mean it's really important."
"Of course it is!! I'm gonna be Hokage some day! She can't give me lame missions!" Naruto cried triumphantly. Sakura rolled her eyes at his stupidity while Sasuke just huffed a quiet sigh. When they finally reached the Hokage Tower, Naruto went running up the stairs; the others followed him blandly. Naruto barged into the room to see Tsunade in her chair, her head resting on her desk. She was obviously asleep.
"Wake up Granny! I've got a mission to go on!" Naruto yelled, poking at her. Kakashi sighed at his student's actions while Sakura just glared and Sasuke stared off in the distance.
"Tch, loser," he muttered, watching as a biker hit a curb and flipped over.
The biker was sitting on the ground, clutching his leg. "Oh my God!! It hurts so bad!! Oh my God I'm gonna die!! My leg! I broke my leg!! Oh my God they're gonna have to cut it off!! Oh, the pain!!"
"…funny," Sasuke said.
Meanwhile, Naruto had kept poking Tsunade, his jabs growing more insistent when she still didn't wake up. He was yelling in her ear so loudly Sakura had to cover her own just to save them from permanent damage.
"Come on, you old lady!! Get up!!"
Tsunade stirred and opened her eyes groggily before looking up at him. "Naruto?" she asked him, rubbing her eyes.
"Yeah, you assigned us to a mission!!" Tsunade scratched her head as, for a moment, she couldn't remember. Then she saw the three empty sake bottles lying on her desk and grinned; she had had a nice morning.
"Okay," she said, straightening up. "The mission…right. Team 7, I've called you here because what I'm about to assign to you is extremely important," Tsunade said. She rummaged through the enormous pile of paperwork on her desk and pulled out a file, which she handed to Kakashi. "As you may or may not know, the village is currently going through a sock shortage," she began.
"Sock shortage?" Sakura asked slowly, one eyebrow raised.
"Yes. The supplier for our socks sent us a shipment a few months ago, but it was intercepted along the way. Then it happened again, three weeks ago. Someone is stealing the socks before they reach Konoha, and, if this keeps up, we're going to have a serious problem on our hands. Your mission is to travel to the Hidden Village in the Mist, where we get our socks, and to successfully ensure that our shipment arrives to Konoha safely."
"WHAT?? YOU WANT US TO GO GET SOCKS??" Naruto yelled in disbelief.
"Socks are very important for the people to have, Naruto. If you're going to be Hokage one day, you'll have to lean to think about the people," Tsunade said while Kakashi looked over the file.
"When do you want us to leave?" he asked, closing the file and handing it back to the Hokage.
"In an hour, so get your things ready and then meet up. It'll be a long journey," Tsunade said before Team 7 left her office.
"Naruto, could you stop by Jiraiya's place and get the video camera before we leave?" Sakura asked as their team separated to head towards their homes.
"Sure thing Sakura-chan," Naruto said with a smile before running off. "Now where'd that old pervert say he lived?" he said to himself while wandering around the village. "Oh yeah! Next to the river," Naruto said before running off in that direction. When he finally found the home that he was looking for, Naruto just barged right in without bothering to ask. "Jiraiya-sama? You here?" he asked while searching through the small home. "Jiraiya-sama?" Naruto asked when he came upon a bedroom where strange noises were coming from. Slowly, he opened the door to find that it was only the snoring form of Jiraiya that was making the noises.
"Hey old man, where'd you put the video camera?" Naruto asked, poking his arm. When nothing happened, Naruto opened his mouth to start yelling; it was then that he saw the video camera lying on a desk. "Bingo," Naruto said before snatching the camera and leaving the house. On the way to his own home, Naruto found out that the memory was full on the camera. He looked through the memory. It was entirely filled with scantily-clad or just plain naked women bathing, dancing, and one of them was even eating french fries. "Well this is a bunch of crap," he muttered before deleting all of the videos. With that done, he ran off so he could pack his things for the mission.
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Jiraiya woke with a start and looked around. "I…I thought I sensed a disturbance," he muttered, wiping drool from the corner of his mouth. His eyes happened to land on the desk, where his video camera should have been lying. Panicking, Jiraiya searched through his room. "Where is it? I know I left it on the desk!" he said. Something beneath his foot crinkled. With a puzzled frown on his face, Jiraiya bent over and picked up a piece of paper he had just stepped on. He looked at it quizzically before his eyes widened in horrified realization. It was a ramen coupon.
"Noooo!"
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Woo! First chapter done and it was a pretty long one! Yeah! Anyway, hope you liked this chapter because it's only the beginning! Right now the rating is only T, but it may go up due to content soon to come.
Please review!
Kattie & Danielle