Oh Baby, Baby
Disclaimer: I don't own RENT
"Leave I don't care!" I yelled from my room. "You know what Joanne, I'm packing my bags and I'm leaving!"
I sniffed and fought back tears, Joanne said that it was over, she was leaving. She accused me of being rude and selfish. Now she wanted it to over for good. She'd come back to me, but meanwhile, I was better off packing my bags and getting out of here for a couple of days…maybe go to Mimi's, then again Mimi's been living with Mark and Roger. Oh, shit…I was crying and throwing things in two duffle bags, should last me at least two weeks…if need be. I threw shirts, jeans, a skirt, shoes, and various items that I may need.
I grabbed my two bags miserably and walked past Joanne, sniffing. I didn't say anything until I opened the door and stepped outside that's when I told Joanne that I hoped she was happy and I'd be back to finish getting my stuff…but I was hoping that she want me back before that point. I found myself walking down the street passing some skeevy scumbag who asked if I needed a "lift."
I pushed past fighting tears, mentally kicking myself. I changed so much for her! For her I didn't do things that she didn't want me to, like party or get strange piercings. Best of all I tried to make things work! I changed for her…well, not everything. She like her rules let her have them! I hoped she'd find someone as boring as her! Then she'd come back, begging me saying, "Maureen, honeybear, I can't live without you! Come back to me, baby!" And would I go back? Maybe after making her hunger for me!
I got to Mark's loft and hesitated before knocking on the door. There was Roger, my luck! I didn't have to deal with my ex when I looked like this! I couldn't tell if Roger was going to let me in right away, but moved aside to let me in. Mimi was sitting on the couch, her eyes scared and curious. There was stiffness in the air, cold and haunting memories of this place…that couch was painful, that table was cunning, that window, the projector, the walls. I saw the door of Mark's bedroom open, the soft light of the sun shining out into the hallway. I fought an urge to go and see if he was there. I wanted to curse him for being right about Joanne, I almost wanted to slap him…then again…I missed him, pretty badly too.
Mark never fought back, he let me control and manipulate the situation, and he never wanted to fight with me. Joanne always had to butt-heads. It was her prerogative to fight over everything! So what some woman in a rubber suit flirted with me! I'm a flirt, so it shouldn't hurt, I mean, it means nothing! I flirt with someone; it doesn't make it serious or even anything! Damn her! It was times like these when I missed Mark. I thought that being with a woman would be easier, but it was really much harder because you're dealing with someone who is kind of like you.
"Maureen, are you okay?" Mimi asked.
I frowned for a second. "What do you mean?"
"Your mascara is smudged…you look awful," she replied.
"Thanks…" I muttered pushing past Roger and walking into my old room…which Mimi had apparently taken over, so I went to Collins' old room. I threw my bags on the bed and stamped around the room and kicked a dresser. Roger and Mimi looked at me like I was crazy. Then the sound of the door broke the attention from me to the door.
"Hey," Mark's voice came through the air.
I cringed internally and sat on the bed unsure of what to do. There he was, Mark…the ex…not that I was attracted to him anymore…at least I didn't think so. I mean, I was not into guys anymore. So, I ignored the plunging feeling in my stomach and went to sleep. The world could go to hell for all I cared and could have taken Joanne and Mark with it as well.
I awoke, god knows how many hours later, disoriented and quite fuzzy. I knew I was still very tired, but I pushed myself off of the bed and walked barefoot to the bathroom, looking over my screwed up appearance. I tried fixing myself up so that I didn't look like hell just incase Joanne came here…or I ran into Mark or whatever. They didn't even know what was wrong with me, except that I came in all upset, but who cares. I just continued to clean myself up until a familiar face came into view of the mirror.
"What do you want?" I asked.
"You're crying," Mark said in plain stupidity.
"Well, duh, it's not every day you get dumped," I replied.
"Joanne dumped you."
"Yes, now are you happy, Mark? You were right! She dumped me! Said that I was selfish and rude!"
He didn't say anything, I turned my mascara wouldn't come off my face, but I didn't care. I glared at him with utter hate, but he returned the gaze with care. I stiffed, I felt my defenses fall. My heart turn…I missed him…I did, he was never the fighter…only a lover. He always forgave me no matter how many times I cheated on him. I felt the tears in my eyes, damn they burned really badly. I backed up almost in fear as Mark walked toward me. He gently wiped a tear from my cheek. I turned from his touch.
"Did she hurt you?" he asked.
"Not physically," I whispered.
He was getting dangerously close, I wanted to pull away…I wanted to run. Another part of me wanted to stay and make him mine all over again, but which end was stronger? Which part of me was I willing to let go…I didn't react, I just acted. I couldn't fight anything, I just moved and my lips were crashed against his. A keep kiss, a mind reeling, toe-curling kiss. We fought for domination, our tongues dancing and we didn't once stop to think if it was wrong.
I led the way to Collins' old bedroom, trying to turn the knob while still battling Mark's hungry lips. As the door opened I struggled to keep from falling until he had me pinned against a wall. He pulled and yanked feverishly at my shirt, while I tried doing the same. Neither one of us even sure how it began, but we were going insane. I took off his glasses, tossing them hastily on a nightstand. We paused, catching our breaths; Mark smiled while I just gawked. I found myself trying to figure out who I was…was I Maureen Johnson, the lesbian, performer, or was I Maureen Johnson, Mark's girlfriend, performer. Either way I was a performer, but was I for Mark or Joanne…Joanne had just dumped me off like I was shit…so why put her into the picture here.
I slipped away from Mark, pulling him to the bed with me. "It's alright baby," I purred, "I won't hurt you…much, I promise. Just make me shine and shimmer, make me yours all over again."
"Are you drunk?" he asked.
"Did you taste alcohol?" I shot back.
"Why now?"
I shrugged and pushed him on the bed, "I missed you…I want you…can you forgive me, baby?"
I straddled him, kissing his lips and making sure to shift my weight to my upper body, pushing into him. My hands crawled up and down his sides. Mark responded slowly, his kisses were slow, but had feeling, his arms slowly wrapped around my waist. I felt as though I should have been singing "touchatouchatouch me" from Rocky Horror, I felt so evil, but so good. I was filled with desire, and I didn't even know what fueled it. Slowly more flesh was being revealed, each touch left zinging trails of fire on the skin. Kisses came fierce and demanding; tongues plunged, probed and licked. Teeth nipped and gasps were released.
Mark had taken control of the situation; I was lying on the bed, gazing at him with curiosity and need. I was unashamed; he had seen me naked before, we lived together. I rose and kissed his lips softly, wanting the attention. His hands were stiff on the edge of the bed, slowly I pulled them towards me, placing them on my bare breasts. His face reddened and I couldn't help but to smile. He closed his eyes, but I grabbed his face saying, "Baby, look at me…" Slowly his eyes opened as I pulled him closer, "Mark…please, I need it."
He didn't answer, except to kiss my lips then trail kisses along my jaw. His hands started to react, kneading, pressing and pushing into my breasts. The kisses kept coming, slowly down my neck, dragging along my shoulder and down to my chest. My hands went to his short blond hair, running through it, the gel slowly loosing its hold. I could feel the embarrassment radiating off him…it was pretty arousing that a man could get so embarrassed about sex. I liked the feeling of being all powerful, a sex-goddess.
I honestly didn't know what the hell I was thinking; I was just moving and living. The thought of a condom was totally beyond us at this point. I wasn't thinking about it even after it was over, was he? I couldn't tell. I was so caught up in the sex, the feelings, the power…I had so much power over him. I remember my first thought in the whole after-glow was that Mark was a pretty good lover. I was still me; I was just now questioning me. I knew I loved Joanne, but I still had this bubble of feeling for Mark. Now, I was in Mark's arms…sleeping against his chest…the sound of his heartbeat lulling me to sleep. I was warm and comfortable against his bare flesh. Sleep came easy within his warm embrace…it wasn't so bad being with a guy…although I thought I was over them…go figure…
A/N: Ok, this is a start…I don't know if you can guess what will happen next. This is an idea that I had a long time ago…like oh, damn, a month, when I first got into RENT, because my friend and I think Maureen isn't completely over Mark and is "experimenting." Sorry if she's OOC, but I this is my first fic! And sorry if I got you guys hyped for a sex-scene, gotta keep a rating. La Vie Bohème!