I'm finally getting around to writing this. It's been in my mind for a few weeks now, demanding my attention. This is a yaoi fiction, meaning there's going to be a romance, and sexual relations, between two men. If you're not into that, then you should probably consider hitting the back button. Also, the beginning of this chapter involves shotacon, but that's that's the only place in the story it will be in, so if you're not into that, you can always just skip it, though you'll probably be confused when it gets mentioned later in the story... Your call. Anyway, I hope you enjoy this fanfic!

No matter how far time could want us to be
For you I would surge through the fire and the sea
Our souls are together, my love is for you
My best friend on earth, I will always be true
-unknown

I.

"Nii-chan, is something wrong?" The 10 year old blond asked as he tried crawling up onto my lap, which was not helping the current situation.

"Len, I need to study," I said, using my upcoming test as an excuse to get him out of my presence. This feeling that I was having was not okay.

"Kaito, don't brush me off. I'm bored. Teach me something," he begged, giving me his famous puppy-dog eyes. I always taught him things since I was six years his senior. He loved learning, and I often let him study with me.

"...Do you want me to teach you something that's just for big kids? Something top secret?" I couldn't stop the words coming from my mouth. This child that I had looked after like a brother for 10 years was tempting me in ways that I should definitely have not been tempted. It was wrong. These feelings were bad, but I couldn't stop myself as he nodded excitedly. I got up and locked my door, my hand trembling and my breathing erratic, then returned to the gleeful child.

"Come here, Len," I beckoned as I returned to my chair. He obeyed without delay, coming to stand in front of me with a huge smile on his face. I gulped, once again trying to stop myself from tainting this willing being before me. "This is our secret, okay, Len?" I whispered into his ear.

"I'm good at keeping secrets!" He said giddily, and it was true, which I was thankful for at that moment.

"Do you want to make nii-chan happy?" I asked, cursing myself for taking his adoration for granted.

"I always want to make Kaito nii-chan happy!" His innocence tore through me like a knife, almost making me refrain from doing this awful sin, but it also made him more appealing, so I couldn't contain myself.

"Nii-chan's in pain right now, but I can teach you how to make it go away," I offered, and a worried look spread across his face.

"Oh no! I wanna help! Please let me help, Kaito! I don't want you in pain!" He begged, and a half disgusted, half ecstatic smile spread onto my features. I was furious with myself, but still, I continued.

"This is where the pain is, Len," I told him, resting my hand on my clothed, unfortunate erection.

"I hurt there, too, sometimes. It just started, but I don't like it. So I'll do anything to help you, nii-chan!" He said eagerly. Was he hitting puberty already? The thought swam through my head, filling my mind with fantasies of post-pubescent Len, which I mentally scolded myself for.

"If you rub it enough, it'll stop hurting," I explained. "Sometimes it helps if I do it myself, but it's more effective if someone else does it."

"Can I rub it for you, Kaito?" Len asked so innocently. He was asking, so it was okay, right? No, I scolded myself, not if I was tricking him into this...

"That would be nice," I said, hardening at the anticipation.

"Anything for nii-chan!" His smile was so bright as he reached out to undo my jeans. The sight made my mouth water, but my head throbbed at my internal conflict.

"Let me help you," I offered, trying to quicken the process. I reached down and released myself from the cloth confinement, and I was now exposed to the child. I guess it was too late to back out, now. At least, that's what I told myself to lessen the aggravation I had with myself.

"I'll make it go away," he whispered before grabbing me. I inhaled sharply at the contact. No one other than myself had touched me before, so the feeling was more intense than I was used to. It was fantastic, in a sick, perverted way. My face contorted into a painful, pleasured expression, which didn't go unnoticed.

"Oh no, am I making it worse, Kaito?" Len asked, worried.

"No, Len, you're making it better. Rub a little faster, though," I instructed, and he happily obliged, using both hands to work my member. My hands gripped the arm rests and my teeth dug into my bottom lip from the feeling.

"It's so big and warm..." Len said in wonder as he moved a finger over the head, making my hips jerk.

"Do that again," I commanded, and he did, making heat build up in my groin. I wasn't ready, yet, but I was getting close. "Nnng, faster, Len."

"Is the pain almost gone, nii-chan?" He asked with honest concern.

"Almost. Just keep rubbing, Len." He did, and even though his motions were careless and obviously inexperienced, the pressure was building up, and he was bringing me to my release. "Ahhh," I groaned, feeling my end approaching. "Squeeze it a little harder," I instructed, reaching for a tissue from the conveniently, and strategically, placed tissue box on my desk. The pressure was building and building, and I bucked my hips up a little as he continued to rub me, that sweet smile still on his face because he was helping his beloved brother-figure. "You're doing great, Len," I praised.

"I'm happy I can help nii-chan!" He said, his signature, adorable smile flashing across his features. That was the face that made me climax into the tissue that I shoved over my spurting member, and Len removed his hands. "Is it all better, Kaito?" He asked, and I discarded the tissue and smiled at him.

"Yes, I'm better now. Thank you, Len," I said, smiling at him. I was a disgusting person.

"What did you just say?" My father asked me, one brow raised.

"I said, it's not a rumor. I'm actually gay," I sighed, shifting uncomfortably in my chair. Who he had found out from, I didn't know, but I didn't particularly care, either. It's not like my dad and I had a good relationship, anyway.

"I was dreading that... Well, considering our family beliefs, and the foundations of this company, I have to let you go."

"What?" I asked incredulously.

"You know how this family feels about things like that. Therefore, I cannot allow you to be an heir to this family company," he explained calmly, but I could see a look of horror deep within his eyes.

"Are you seriously kicking me out of the company because of this? I'm your best employee! I work the hardest! I get us the most business! Forget about family matters, think of the company! You need me," I argued.

"We can easily replace you with someone who works just as efficiently. I will not have someone of your kind working in this company," he concluded.

"Fine, I'll find a better job. Maybe I'll even start my own company! I have the skills and the money for it," I threatened, but to no avail.

"Well, then I wish you good luck with that, Kaito." That was it. Those were his last words to me. I huffed and left his office, then went to mine and angrily stuffed anything important into a box. I didn't need this stupid family company. I didn't even like the car business, anyway. Most of our associates didn't even speak the same language as us, which was always a pain.

As they often did, my thoughts drifted to Len, who I hadn't seen since he graduated high school, two years ago. I wondered how he was doing. Was he in college? Was he living on his own? Maybe he was starting a family... That last thought stabbed into me. Len... I had always acted like an older brother, but there was always this feeling inside of me that wanted that sweet boy. He was one of the reasons I realized my sexuality.

At first, I thought maybe I just had feelings for him. After getting dared at a party to kiss another guy, I thought maybe I just liked to experiment. But when a cute sophomore came up to me junior year and confessed to me, after deciding to date him, then fucking his brains out, I knew I was gay. We had lasted until about halfway through my freshman year of college. He was such a sweet kid. Caring, good looking, and a great fuck, too. The distance wasn't working, though, and we were starting to drift apart, so we mutually called it quits.

Since then, I've only had one other boyfriend, and a few fuck buddies here and there. All were kept under wraps, of course. I knew it would be bad if my family found out. Clearly, I was right.

I took my box and stalked angrily out of my office and towards the elevator, ignoring the curious looks from my former co-workers. I sighed in relief when the doors came together, giving me a moment of solitude to collect my thoughts. What was I going to do now? Was I really capable of starting my own business? Probably, yes. However, that seemed like too much stress for my liking. I was a hard worker, but I was just that; a worker. As in, working under somebody. That way, there was always someone there to fix things in case I fucked up.

I felt my phone buzz in my pocket, but I ignored it. I figured it was a family member wanting to chew me out. It went off again, so I guessed it was important. I checked it to see Luka calling, so I answered.

"Maybe you can make me feel better," I teased.

"Uh oh, does the little heir have troubles?" She retorted.

"Not an heir anymore, unfortunately..." I said, grimacing.

"Wait, what?"

"Somehow my father found out," I said, suppressing a groan.

"Found out about what? That you like dick?" She asked, trying to lighten the mood. I chuckled halfheartedly.

"Yeah, he did. So I'm kicked out of the business, and most likely the family."

"Do you have to move out of your apartment, since they pay for it?"

"I didn't ask, but it's probable."

"Well, I'd let you stay with me until you find something else, but Miku's moving in with me this week. I'm actually on my way to her house right now to help load boxes into my car," she explained. Luka and I had actually become best friends on the basis that we were both gay. Her and Miku have been secretly dating for about five years now, since Miku entered her senior year of high school.

"It's okay, I'll find something. Plus, I have a lot saved up in my bank account, just in case."

"Kaito..." She trailed off.

"What?"

"You should ask Len if you can stay with him."

"Luka, I haven't talked to Len in two years. I can't just call him up, out of the blue, and ask him to put me up for a while," I declined.

"You should call him up, anyway! Rin's constantly telling me that he talks about you all the time."

"You still keep in touch with Rin?" Rin was to Luka what Len had always been to me. Well...in a sense. They were close, and Rin adored Luka, but Luka never had any taboo feelings for Rin.

"We talk a few times a week, and meet for lunch at least once a month. I wish you and Len would do the same."

"I've been busy; you know that. I just figured that he's been busy, too. He's 20 now. He's probably settling down."

"Kaito, hardly anyone settles down at 20," she corrected me, and I could imagine the face she was giving me.

"Miku's only 22, and she's settling down with you," I challenged.

"Okay, but I'm 26, so that's a little different. You're the same age as me, and you're not even close to settling down. Please, just call him up. I know he misses you, and you sure as hell miss him." She was right... I missed him a lot. I wasn't exactly sure why I never contacted him. However, he never tried to get a hold of me, either.

"Okay, okay, I'll call him. But I can't ask something like that of him."

"He'd be more than willing..." she mumbled.

"Luka, do you know something I don't?" I interrogated.

"Of course I do. I talk to his twin sister all the time, so it's only natural," she said nonchalantly.

"Luka!" I shouted, earning strange looks from the few people I passed as I made my way through the parking garage.

"Kaito, I'm not gonna bottle feed you information. You need to talk to Len yourself," she said, clearly showing that she wasn't gonna talk about this anymore.

"Alright, I said I'd call him," I huffed.

"See him in person," she demanded.

"I'll ask if he's busy," I told her.

"He's not, so you have no excuse. Do it now."

"I can't, I'm on the phone with you." No reply. "Luka?" beep beep beep. "Damn," I growled, getting into my car. I sighed and ran a hand through my hair, separating the blue locks that were lightly held together with a small amount of gel. I sat in my car for a few moments, not bothering to start the ignition. I leaned my head back against the headrest and thought for a minute. Did Len really still think about me? To think he would've been disgusted with me when he was old enough to understand the awful memory that I gave him 10 years ago. But no, he always stayed loyally by my side with that flawless smile of his. Even when I was with my first boyfriend, Len rarely left my mind. Perfect little bastard...

Only half aware of what I was doing, my phone somehow ended up against my ear and ringing, signaling that I was trying to call someone. It continued to ring, and it felt endless, so I almost gave up, but a familiar voice answered, and I felt my entire being become elated.

"Kaito?" His soft voice sounded surprised, but just hearing him sent massive amounts of comfort through me.

"Len..."

Short, I know, but hey, it's a first chapter. I can't guarantee how often updates will be, but don't worry, it won't be once a year or anything crazy like that xD it could be anywhere from two days to a month, so bare with me. Thank you to anyone who read this chapter and decides to stay with it! I hope you liked it!