(Based on "Twenty Reasons" by floatingdaydream. It's pretty much the same for the first, maybe second chapter, but it will continue.)
Every time I see him I scowl. I hate him. I hate him down to his bone marrow. I hate his existance. I hate everything about him, and just to prove it I've decided to make a list of everything I hate about that damned Gilbert Beilshmidt. He hadn't come to Roderich and my house again today, and my flames of hatred haven't been tamed just yet.
I dipped my hand under my night gown, to where a pair of keys rested on the violet ribbon that adorned my neck every day. One was larger and more ornate, it belonged to the drawer in my vanity that I kept locked. The second was much smaller and simpler, and it belonged to my diary. I unlocked the drawer and pulled out the small, secret book.
I have been writing in a diary since I was very young, it's been thirteen years and I've gone through as many diaries, one for each year. I keep the one's I've finished in a trunk under my bed, and I've sworn not to look through them unless absolutely necessary. The current diary is a dull red leather bound one with a faded green spine. Gilbert gave it to me for my birthday, and I use it so that I wouldn't have to pay for a new one, not because I liked it or anything...and certainly not because it was sweet of him to remember that I kept a diary!
I unlocked the book and opened it to the latest page, marking the date. Before I began, I made sure to note in my mind that his cute little bird, selfishly named "Gilbird", would be kept out of the things I hate about him. Since that was one of the very, very, very few things I actually sort of liked about the annoying asshole. Then, I began writing on the small red lines.
I hate his cocky smiles.
I hate his way of speaking.
I hate how he makes fun of me.
I hate how he hates my fiance, Roderich.
I hate his creepy laugh.
I hate the way he looks at me.
I hate how he is always bragging about how "awesome" he is.
I hate his narrow mindedness.
I hate how he never apologizes.
I hate that he never thanks anyone sincerely.
I hate how he teases me for being a tomboy when I was young.
I hate how he struts around our house like he is our family.
I hate how he sits on the grass and watches the sun set in our garden.
I hate his red eyes.
I hate his platinum blonde hair.
I hate his muscular body.
I hate how he walks.
I hate his voice.
I hate when he gets close to me.
I giggled about the thought of adding "I hate him because I love him" at the end, like a novel I once read. I dismissed such a silly thing, because what is someone read these in the future and thought that I actually did love him? That would be mortifying! As I read over the list, I found myself trying to give reasons why I hate these things.
I hate his cocky smiles.
Of course I hate them! He's always so sure of himself, and it's just plain annoying. I hate lots of things about him because of things he says with that stupid smile. Like, "Ha! You can't ever be as awesome as me you stupid girl!" It was so aggravating!
I hate his way of speaking.
I remember when he was little and he would speak with confidence and playfulness, but not bossy at all. I guess I started hating it when I moved in with Roderich. Gilbert began to talk like he was challenging me to compete with him, calling me weak at the same time he was calling me a "wild woman". He would do the same to my dear Roderich, calling him a pussy, prick, and other uncouth things.
He probably wouldn't act this way if I was still free to beat the nastiness out of him. I can't though...both Roderich's and my own parents arranged the marriage to give me a higher social standing, because they were old friends. So, I must act like a lady even when I don't want to. It annoys me that I have to let that dick Gilbert get away with so much! He's not that low on the social scale himself, so he should know how to act!
I hate how he makes fun of me.
He's always said things that get on my nerves, but it's been much worse recently. I hate them so much! It makes me so insecure. It's not just his way of saying things, it's the words themselves. "You're gonna marry that stingy, proper, son-of-a-bitch? God bless you," or, "You're not really girly, so just stop!" Various things about my marriage and new attitude had been uttered as well.
I had tried so hard to please my family and Roderich with my new self, so it hurt when my childhood friend was being such a douche lately. I had begun hating him in the past years. I'm only doing this because my parents need the money, and it's just a bonus that Roderich is such a gentleman.
I hate how he hates my fiance, Roderich.
Roderich has never done anything but be nice to him! All my life Gilbert has been practically evil to him. Gilbert would shoot Nerf darts at his face, push him in the mud, hide his sheet music, and spit on his shoes. I never could figure out why Gil would always be like that, and when I asked he glared at me.
Roderich has always been kind to me, getting me flowers and treating me like a lady. I remember when Gil used to treat me like that. He'd give me first aid whenever I got hurt when we were playing, he'd give me wild flowers, and he'd protect me from the pranks of the other kids in the neighborhood.
I hate his creepy laugh.
What the hell is up with that strange "Kesesesesese~" laugh that he does? He sounds perverted or something whenever he laughs like that. It's not all the time either, it's when he's been simply awful to someone, or is thinking of a way to be.
I hate the way he looks at me.
When we are alone, he just stares at me. He looks like a bear that's calm and slightly curious about something. It's so animal and strange. His red eyes go all wide and they sparkle like gems as he looks at me so intently. It makes me feel naked to him. It never lasts long, and I've sworn not to be alone with him any more than I absolutely have to now, just to avoid it.
I hate his narrow mindedness.
He's so stupid. Gilbert only thinks about a select few things, and doesn't open up to much. Beer, GIlbird, pranks, the other two parts of the "Bad Touch Trio", his little brother Ludwig, and a few other things. It's annoying, because he has a set oppinion about everything.
I hate how he is always bragging about how "awesome" he is.
I'm fed up! And who wouldn't be? I don't understand, and I don't want to understand why he's so obsessed about his own "awesomeness". He's constantly rating everyone else's "awesomeness" too. I wouldn't ever say he's awesome, unless he learns how to play piano better than Roderich can. I heard him mutter something the other day, "'f we were together, you'd be awesome like me." That was confusing.
I hate how he never apologizes.
If he messes something up, or does something on accident, he doesn't apologize. He'll demand that you apologize for his own foolishness, or will move awkwardly on with a conversation. It's so...ugh! He's such a douche! I accept apologies when I get them, and don't bear grudges afterwards, so why can't he?
I hate that he never thanks anyone sincerely.
He always says "thank you" in the most bored or joking manner. It makes me want to never ever help him. Even when I get him coffee when he demands it like he owns the place. Even when I helped him to the hospital that time he broke his foot trying to fly with Gilbird off the roof when he was younger. Even when someone gives that asshole a compliment for once.
I hate how he teases me for being a tomboy when I was young.
There were never any girls in the neighborhood, so I had to act like a boy to get along. He never cared when we were younger, but now he does. He's so bipolar about it too. He'll tease me about being a tomboy, then tease me about being girly now. I can't please him!
I hate how he struts around our house like he is family.
He acts like I should be his maid or something. He will walk around our grounds and in our house, but will rarely speak to us unless it's an insult. Gilbert will eat with us and change things in the house daily. Then, sometime after dinner he'll just leave without a word. It is the strangest, creepiest thing!
I hate how he sits on the grass and watches the sun set in our garden.
It's almost like he's homeless. He lingers until late, then goes to the garden and sits cross-legged and watches the sky. He looks so serious and wise, yet wicked as the shadows lengthen on his face. It's strange. It's like watching him get older.
I hate his red eyes.
I don't hate the fact that he was born with them. It's just that the color is so unnerving. The ruby color always feels like they belong to a demon, and in a way they do. They look like they see through everything about me. It's so contradicting of him, the rambunctious, annoying prankster to have eyes that look so serious and alluring. They are truly gorgeous eyes, and I hate thinking that about someone I hate.
I hate his platinum blonde hair.
Again, I don't hate him for being born with it. It's such a pretty color. It shines and glows when he moves in the sunny garden. I like the color a lot, so much so that on occasion just his hair will make me smile. I don't want Gilbert to have the ability to make me smile anymore, that should be purely Roderich's job. I don't want him to be beautiful.
I hate his muscular body.
I hate how his body is so perfect. It's balanced and gorgeous and hot and... It's awful that Gilbert is blessed with such beauty. Beauty should belong to Roderich. I don't even understand why he started working out. He said it was because, "This Russian dick said that he hated my eyes and beat me up" I guess he wanted revenge.
I hate how he walks.
It comes it two kinds. Soldier like, which sort of scared her sometimes. Gilbert always seemed like he'd be a terrifyingly great soldier, but she never wanted to find out. The way he carried himself was so stiff and serious sometimes, and when he walked like that it was almost like he was going to kill someone. The other kind was filled with swagger (not "swag", this means that he walked like he was swaying sort of) and laughs. He walked like that with friends or when he simply didn't care.
I hate his voice.
An annoying douche like Gil shouldn't be able to have such a soft, serious, manly voice whenever he wanted. I can imagine him speaking to armies about strategies, or telling someone bad news, or tricking someone into believing him. I either wish Gilbert was as serious as that voice all the time, or that he didn't have it.
I hate when he gets close to me.
Whenever you hate someone as dearly as I hate Gilbert, you will try to hinder any possible point of contact. It's strange how he acts when it's the two of us. It's like he really trys to be good, but simply can't help being awful. I hate how the try is so obvious, and it makes me upset that the result is so upsetting.
I heard a knock at my door, "Elizabeta, are you in?" It was Roderich.
"Yes dear. You may come in." I hid the diary in the drawer quickly. I didn't want anyone to read my diaries until I was dead and gone.
Roderich walked in cautiously, then when he saw I was dressed in a night gown, he relaxed slightly. He had a sealed envelope in his right hand. "My dear, this came by private courier just now. I'd like to know what's in it when you finish reading it."
I nodded and took the letter from him, setting it on my vanity. "Anything else dear?"
"Yes, I was wondering when you would think it appropriate to move into my room. I know we aren't married yet, but I think we should be familiar with each other before the ceremony."
I knew he didn't mean sex, it was obvious that he just wanted to sleep next to me. That was fine, but I wasn't quite ready. "I'd like to wait a bit longer, if you don't mind."
He nodded and smiled softly, "That is all for now." Roderich turned and left the room, closing the door behind him.