it was a fine summer day in the layton orphanage i mean household. clive dove had recently been miraculously bailed out of jail after professor layton gave in and murdered an entire community of lovable robot people for the reinhold fortune solely to satisfy his compulsive need to nurture every urchin he meets. one could delve into the psychological origins of his obsession and not resurface into the following narrative for several chapters, so though its probably more fascinating, we'll avoid the subject of what was no doubt a very affectionless upbringing and traumatically lonely childhood in favor of lengthy descriptions of clives eyes.

clive was now living with the professor along with the two other charity cases luke and flora, despite that he was well above the age at which he shouldve gotten a fucking job. but years of plotting revenge had sadly distracted him from his education, greatly narrowing his career prospects until the only positions he was qualified to fill were ''sociopath'' and ''brilliant robotics engineer". as we all know, there is very low demand for the latter in society compared to the demand for the former in the shape of various politicians and/or criminals, so it was understandable that a terrorist career was the path he chose.

at the beginning of our story, clive happened to be lounging on the couch like the lazy fucking freeloading shit he is and reflecting seriously upon just how unbelievably fortunate he was that the mysterious clout layton held over the prime minister had been enough to pardon his unspeakable treason. flora was reading pornographic literature behind a massive cookbook. ( "that girl's dedication to improving her culinary skills is truly inspiring!" the professor would often remark, seemingly oblivious to the real cause of her hungry expression. ) luke was off doing stupid luke things, probably picking his nose or hallucinating a conversation with a squirrel.

"hey aniki" flora whispered really close to clives ear now.

"what the fuck do you want flora and im not calling you imouto" he snapped after being pulled from his reverie of how kind fate had been to him and also how great it would be if he could fuck an alternate timeline version of himself. ''feeling bored?" she rasped seductively.

''unbearably.'' he smirked, almost naively unaware of where she was taking this.

''you know... i can think of something to entertain us both" she whispered, the words dripping from between her two slick rosy lips like turds out a fucking anus as she twirled her dainty index finger on his thigh. ''yeah ok spit it out then i cant take your odious presence much longer'' he replied, blushing faintly. ''you have to guuuuessss~!" she insisted with a saccharine giggle. he noted that her voice was finally undergoing puberty and that the whole cutesy cartoon thing just wasn't working for her anymore, but very charitably indulged her. "are you suggesting a board game of some sort?" he teased. "better." she grinned from ear to ear. "a tea party?" he guessed. "you're no fun, aniki, if that's all you can come up with" she pouted, and for a minute she thought he looked a little crestfallen, but he regained composure. "well, maybe you should give me a hint." he suggested, seemingly beginning to enjoy the banter.

flora leaned in with a sickening smile and began whispering into his ear. within seconds his face lost all color. his eyes were those of a broken man. after a few minutes of her expression becoming more gleeful wih every soft word she spoke, he couldn't take any more, and with his cheeks flushed deeply he swiveled his head to face her and cupped a hand over her glossy mouth. "I'M SORRY, I DIDNT QUITE CATCH THAT!'" he blurted anxiously. "DID YOU SAY GO OUT FOR ICE CREAM? WOW, FLORA, YOU'RE JUST FULL OF NEW AND REVOLUTIONARY THOUGHTS AND IDEAS! A HAH A HA HA."

"sure thing, aniki darling~!" she squealed. "i presume you'll be buying?" she added, a glint in her collossal eye. "naturally." he sighed.

the ambigous couple, one half of which could be described as "happy", set off into the street, leaving luke alone and unsupervised without a second thought. as they set foot on the quaint cobblestone street characteristic of no time period in particular, clive took the uneasy silence as an opportunity to reflect on some his poorest life choices. after purchasing two vanilla cones, flora, eyes shimmering, took his hand in hers before he could protest and led him further down the avenue, licking the cone with an impressive degree of sensuality.

to his horror, a surprisingly silky yet robust start to a familiar song began to escape her mouth. "There's something sweet

and almost kind

but he was mean and he was coarse and unrefined~"

oh no

"but now he's dear, and so unsure... I wonder why I didn't see it there before.."

no

she glanced his way

she'd never looked at him that way before

"oh god no flora I am not singing this with you"