Okay, so to be perfectly honest, I'm not sure whether or not I like this one. I just sorta started writing and playing around with my writing style and this just sorta happened. I've done stuff kinda like this before, but I still don' know whether or not I really like it...
Just a bit of a warning: EXTREME OOCness. Spock is very not Spock-like. I did that on purpose, because I like the idea that he isn't put together all the time. I mean, he's half human, after all, and you can't squash that down 24/7.
Anyway, I'm posting it to see what you guys think. Hope you all enjoy it!
Disclaimer: I don't own Star Trek. As much as I wish I did, I don't.
Warning: Slash. This is Kirk/Spock. Spork, Spirk, Kock, whatever you like calling it, that's what it is, so if you don't like reading slash, this story is not for you! :)
I've rated this one M because I'm paranoid and was apparently in an "I feel like saying fuck" kind of mood. :P
Allons-y!
-Rayne
Sometimes, Kirk makes Spock mad on purpose.
He does it more often than he's really willing to admit, but he knows it's for their own good. Spock has issues with his Human half and the emotions that come along with it, and Kirk knows he has just as much trouble expressing himself as his Vulcan friend.
Sometimes, Kirk will pull Spock aside and start a conversation that he knows will end badly. Sometimes, he'll tell Spock he's wrong even when they both know he's right. Sometimes, he'll yell at Spock for not feeling anything when the both know that's not entirely true. It doesn't matter what verbal weapon he uses because every time, he gets what he wants.
Shouting matches are his favorite. Occasionally, he doesn't mind it if one of them gets a swing or two in, but he really enjoys shouting and yelling. They will both get so worked up that when all is said and done, neither of them will really remember why they started arguing in the first place.
Kirk acts human in these moments. He expresses himself in one of the only ways he knows how. He insults and shouts at his companion, wanting nothing more than to get a rise out of the usually stoic man. He walks away feeling refreshed, like he's said what needed saying even though nothing useful was even said in the first place.
Spock let's all his barriers drop. His voice will rise far more than what is considered acceptable for Vulcan's. He'll yell until he's hoarse, shooting insults and slinging curses at his Captain. He has his selection of favorite phrases and words to use, ranging from "human imbecile" and "inferior creature" to words as primitive as "you asshole" and "fuck you". Words will leak from his mouth, stinging like ice and piercing like a knife. They will taste like venom in his mouth and feel like poison rolling off his tongue, but he says them anyway because he needs the verbal release, needs the feeling of his heart racing and blood rushing as Kirk responds in kind.
And at the end, he will act as though nothing had happened. He will act as though he hadn't had a very human moment, as though the feelings he'd portrayed during their fight were never felt in the first place, and as though he didn't know exactly why Kirk egged him on to start with.
And then, one day, they are fighting and it all changes.
Spock is yelling. "I don't care what you think. I am going down to the surface, whether or not you like it."
"Why the hell should I let you go down? You don't fucking need to be down there. Believe it or not, the world doesn't revolve around you, and just because you feel that it's necessary that you are down there doesn't mean I'm just going to let you."
"The world revolving around me? Illogical. I just wish you would realize it doesn't revolve around you, either. Why is it so important that I'm not down there?"
"Because you are you. You're Vulcan and you and your emotionless self would ruin what we are trying to accomplish."
"As hard as you find it to wrap your puny mind around the idea, you might find that my logical approach proves far more useful than your emotional one."
"No is no, Spock!"
"Fuck you!"
"I am your superior officer, and what I say is final!"
"You may be my captain, but you are in no way superior to me. Now tell me the truth. Why are you so desperate to keep me up here?"
"I already told you!"
"You told me what you thought I'd expect to here, not the truth! I want the truth! Now!"
"Because I fucking care!"
Spock is momentarily at a loss for words. "What?"
Kirk doesn't know what possesses him to do it, but he reaches out and grips Spock by the front of his shirt, yanking him forward and forcing their lips together in a rough, sloppy kiss. Spock's entire body tenses at first. After a moment of Jim's brutal attack, though, he responds with an equal amount of passion, wrapping his arms around Kirk's back and pulling him closer. Tongues tangle as fingers weave through hair. Skin is marred and clothes are rumpled and teeth clash and mouths bite and moans fill the otherwise quiet room and they can't bring themselves to care because they are so caught up in each other, clinging to one another and searching for the release that they so desperately crave that slinging words will no longer satisfy.
When Jim pulls away, he stares at Spock for a moment. The Vulcan looks dazed. His hair is mussed and his shirt has been shoved up and his lips are tinged green and swollen and there is a fire in his eyes that Kirk has never seen before. Jim is sure that he looks just as well-kissed.
Neither are really quite sure what to say to each other. So they don't say anything at all. Spock let's go of Jim, straightening himself up and vacating the room without a glance back.
Jim sighs and pulls at his hair in frustration. He feels calmer than he ever has after an argument, though, and wonders if maybe Spock feels the same way.
Evidently, he does. From then on, instead of words and insults and occasional punches, their emotional relief comes from heated kisses and wandering hands and needy noises. Instead of shouting, they've begun to take it out on each other physically, leaving marks on necks and bruises on hips as they take place in something that isn't quite lovemaking but isn't senselessly fucking one another into the mattress, either.
Spock still let's his guard down in these private moments. He raises his voice and whispers endearments and makes his appreciation known. He still has his favorite phrases, ranging from "need you" and "please" to "fuck, yes" and even the occasional murmured "t'hy'la". The words coming from his mouth are no longer insults. Instead, compliments drip from his lips like honey.
Kirk loves the moments when he can get Spock to allow his human side to completely take control. He knows that this method of expressing their pent-up emotions is even better for their health. It's not a relationship by any means, but it does reduce the amount of arguments, both in private and in public, and leaves him satiated and satisfied, as though what he needed to say was said even though the words remain unspoken between them.
Umm yeah so there it is. I still really don't know how I feel about it. So tell me what you think! Like it? Don't like it? Suggestions? Review! Thanks for reading!
-Rayne