So, here goes! (Hey, it was this, or include a Monty Python reference in every story I write from here on out. )
DISCLAIMER: I do not own Pokemon, James Bond, Monty Python, DMFA, or anything else I use or refrance to in here. There. Happy?
T--T
One
Drew's Roselia leaned against the doorway, watching her coordinator sleeping. Pokemon College was rough on him, and boring for her. It was February, around Valentines Day, and Roselia was thinking about a romance for her trainer.
"Ros-eh-ly, rosa rose... " She mused. May and Drew would be the sweetest couple...
She could see them now, saving the world one Pokemon at a time, vigilantes, or even better.. SPIES!!
Suddenly, she had an idea. "Rosa rose Rosali-aaahh... rosy rosel! " I know! I'll write a romantic spy story on Drew's computer, then send it to May, she think it's from him, and... YES! Their romance will blossom!!
Roselia gazed raptly at the computer, entranced with her plan... until she realized she did not have hands.
"Rosy rose... " I need an accomplice... Bingo!
She dashed into the hallway, finding Blaziken after a second of searching. May's Pokemon was standing outside of Drew's door, wrists flaming as he prepared to scorch a word into the wall, most likely a profanity. He's got hands, she thought, he can write it all up for me...
Wait.. He would never help me set them up together.. But if he though it was a prank!
"Rose rosy, roselia, rosa rosy rosel! " Hastily she explained her plan to the fire Pokemon. He paused for a moment, then nodded.
"Blaze blazi ken ken... Iken! " If you let me be in it, yes!
"Rosel!! " Let's go!
T--T
The sunlight shone down on Slateport beach, warming the sands and nicely tanning a green haired, lumpy -
( Blaziken gave Roselia an amused glance. I think the term you are looking for is muscular, not lumpy. Roselia dismissed him. Lumpy, muscular, it all sounds the same to me. )
- green haired, muscular middle aged man. His name was Drew Rose. He leaned back in his chair, soaking up the sunlight, a faint smile tingeing his face as he remarked to his partner Roselia, "Feels nice to be on vacation, eh Roselia? "
"Rosel rosa... " she replied drowsily. Yeah, really nice.
Suddenly, there was a buzzing beep, and Drew sighed as he pulled out a sleek cell phone.
"Hello? "
"Get dressed, Mr. Rose. You've got a job to do. "
The green haired man groaned as he sat up straight, grabbing his bag as he did so, and nodding to Roselia.
"This better be good, M. I'm on vacation, remember? "
The voice on the other side of the line was tinged heavily with sarcasm. "Well, sorry for disturbing you when the world has got to be saved. "
"Didn't I just save it a week ago? " Drew replied as he headed for the changing rooms.
"Heh. Touche. " The teenage boy pushed his glasses further up his nose. "Shipyard in five. "
"Got it. " Drew buttoned his white shirt up, hanging up the phone.
"Rosel rosa? " The Pokemon could be heard from outside the wooden door.
"No, I'm not done yet. "
"Rose roselia rosy, " she remarked cynically.
"Oh, quit it. All you have to do is put on sunglasses. I have to get on a suit. " Drew put on his sunglasses as well, stuffed his swimsuit back in his bag, then the partners left the changing room, looking completely different and out of place.
Drew knocked on the door to the old shipyard, waited a second, then kicked down the door.
"No manners and no patience. Hello, Mr. Rose. "
Drew took a seat opposite Max. "Well, what's the crisis this time? "
"Harley again. Busted out of jail by shonen-ai-ing the guards to death. " Max stated. (DMFA reference)
"How does someone... No, wait, don't answer that question. "
Max suppressed a cold laugh. "Anyway, I though you might want this mission. "
"Well, I don't like Harley, but there are a lot of people in this department who'd want a crack at him, so.. "
"He's kidnapped May. We don't know whether she's alive, dead.. or worse... "
"Ah. I'm glad you called me in for this. "
"I though you'd want to save your girlfriend. " Max frowned ever so slightly. He had never liked his sister dating the most arrogant and annoying agent they had. Still, Drew was the best agent, and if anyone could save May, it would be him.
"Heh. Hey, M... "
"Yes? "
Drew's gaze grew cold. "Do I have permission to use unnecessary force to bring him in? "
"Normally, no, but considering the circumstances and off the record, go right ahead. Now, back to the mission. Harley's base is in the desert, in the shape of a Cacturn's head. "
"Sounds easy to find. What's the catch? "
"It's underground, and the desert is a Pokemon preserve. That means PPP won't let us scan the earth or anything. You're going to have to dig up most of the desert. With a shovel. "
"No gadgets? But.. All spies get gadgets!! "
"Hey, look at this way, lover boy, you can work on your tan. " Max chuckled nastily.
"I swear, sarcasm is a requirement of joining this department. "
Max gave his sister's boyfriend a cold grin. "Remember, it's because of you I joined... "
Drew sighed. How could he forget? He had been dating May while in the department, and gotten careless. She had discovered his 'profession' and followed him to one of the meeting points a couple years ago. She had already told Max, and the department was willing and able to kill them both to keep the departments existence unknown, but at the last minute, Drew had convinced the department to hire them. May had become a master of hidden weaponry, and Max was a technical genius, both invaluable agents. All because Drew had gotten very drunk and dropped a hint about his next meeting place. He would never forget the scolding and suspension that had followed. Ever.
Max absently threw him a knife. "Oh, yeah the bosses told me to give this to you. "
Drew caught the blade by its blue titanium blade. "No guns? "
Max tapped the cubic zirconia pommel stone, and the handle slid a small extension out along the blade that was shaped like a tube, and another extension like a handle and trigger.
"No guns that anyone knows about. And here's your shovel. Now, don't go shooting up anything."
It was a boring, cheap, standard type shovel. Drew sighed. "You're really serious about this underground thing, aren't you? "
"Yep. "
"Then how do you know what his base looks like if you can't see it? "
Max chuckled. "That's right, you failed your Predictability In Villains courses, didn't you? An odd shape is standard for someone like Harley. And I'll bet you money that the code to get into his place is Harley Is Amazing, or something equally obvious and laden with blatant ego. Now, run along, Mr. Rose. Your mission awaits! "