It's All About the Coffee

On the Planet…

Captain Kathryn Janeway giggled.

Commander Chakotay, who was seated next to her, abruptly halted in the middle of his explanation to NeTal, the Palotian First Councilor, and stared at her.

She grinned back at him and gestured for him to continue the conversation.

A little nonplussed, Chakotay resumed his dialogue. "And then in exchange for the dilithium—" He broke off again as Kathryn let out another burst of laughter. Chakotay looked at her with barely contained exasperation. What was wrong with her? They were in the midst of negotiations for direly needed supplies—and she was laughing?

He quickly glanced around the table to see if anyone else had noticed. B'Elanna was deep in conversation with a Palotian engineer about dilithium while Neelix was discussing the prices and nutritional values of various types of produce with one of the farming leaders.

When he turned back to his own group, he realized that NeTal was gazing at Kathryn with an unreadable expression on his face. Chakotay felt his stomach sinking. This negotiation had to be successful. They had no other options for thousands of light years, and the ship and its crew were already running on the bare minimum.

He placed a tentative hand on Kathryn's arm. "Captain," he murmured so only she could hear. For some reason, this only made her giggle harder, and slowly the sounds of the conversations around them faded as all eyes in the room made their way towards the Captain of the Starship Voyager.

When Kathryn realized that everyone was staring at her, her laughter became even more uncontrollable, and tears began streaming down her face as her whole body shook with merriment.

"Captain Janeway," NeTal began tersely. "I don't understand, nor do I appreciate—"

But Chakotay cut him off. "Lieutenant," he barked to Tuvok who was already walking towards them. He gestured wordlessly to the Captain. Tuvok nodded calmly and then assisted Kathryn to her feet. Within seconds, they had transported back to the ship, and the only reminder of the faux pas was the shocked silence that still permeated the room.

Chakotay turned back to the Councilor, praying that somehow he could save the trade agreements. "Councilor NeTal," he said gravely, "I apologize profusely for the Captain. I am afraid she might be ill. She does not normally behave like that." Chakotay held his breath for the official's reply.

But NeTal's ruddy face had gone pale, and he gripped the edge of the conference table.

"The Choc'tul," he murmured.

"I beg your pardon?" Chakotay asked.

"The Choc'tul, " NeTal repeated. "Your captain. She…" He broke off again, and Chakotay felt nameless worry flooding his chest.

"Councilor, please explain," he said as calmly as he could.

NeTal sighed. "Commander Chakotay, your captain asked me about a certain substance, a hot drink that she desires, coffee I believe it's called, when we first spoke. She described it as a brew from beans of strong flavor, with stimulant properties. It seemed to be similar to Choc'tul, a popular drink on our planet. I brought some to our meeting today." He pointed to the empty mug sitting in front of Kathryn's vacated seat. "Truly, I thought her body was already accustomed to its stimulatory properties. If I had thought…" NeTal stopped and gestured helplessly.

Chakotay felt relief and then anger. With Kathryn, it was all about the coffee. Did she ever stop and think? This wasn't the first time she'd suffered an adverse reaction from recklessly trying some planet's coffee-like brew. (Although, he had to admit, it was the first time she'd completely embarrassed herself in public. Usually it was just the Doctor who had to remedy the ill effects of her addiction.)

Chakotay closed his eyes for a moment, trying to summon his inner calm. Straightening his shoulders, he looked the Councilor in the eyes and then spent the next ten minutes trying to persuade him that what had happened had not been NeTal's fault in the least.

In the Ready Room…

As soon as Chakotay had beamed back to Voyager, he contacted the Doctor. Of course, the Doctor knew exactly why he was calling and didn't even wait for him to ask.

"The Captain is fine, Commander. Most of the effects of the Choc'tul are purged from her system. She seems tired, however, and has quite the headache. I could have eased her pain, but I thought that perhaps it might be a deterrent for next time."

Chakotay snorted and didn't try to hide it. "Good luck with that, Doctor. And good work. Chakotay out." He stood uncertainly in the hallway for a minute, fighting with himself, then gave up and asked the computer for Kathryn's whereabouts. The smug voice reported that she was in her ready room so he headed for the bridge.

The crew didn't seem surprised to see him; in fact, most of them looked rather relieved. They were worried about their captain but too embarrassed to face her.

Chakotay pressed the door chime and heard a faint voice respond. He stepped into the room, blinking at the darkness. When his eyes finally adjusted, he could just make out Kathryn sprawled on the couch.

"Don't even say it, Commander," she said sharply, wincing as he upped the room's illumination. She covered her eyes with the back of her arm.

The two of them sat in silence for several long moments until Chakotay could hold back no longer.

"I just hope you've learned your lesson." Had he kept the bitterness out of his voice?

Silence.

Eventually, Kathryn drew her arm off her face and squinted at him. "How did the rest of the negotiations go?"

"Quite well, actually, considering…" He broke off under the heat of her glare. How did she manage to harness such fury into a simple look, especially when she could barely keep her eyes open? "The Councilor agreed to all of the terms we originally proposed. We got the dilithium for engineering, the star charts for astrometrics, the seedlings for the airponics bay, as well as fresh fruits and vegetables. We should have enough stores to keep us for several months." He paused for a moment and then continued in a voice that was barely audible. "The Councilor removed the supply of Choc'tul from the list." He waited for an explosion but none came.

Silence again.

"It tasted just like the real thing, "she finally said in a wistful voice.

"Kathryn," he said warningly.

Stubborn silence this time.

Chakotay drew in a long, deep breath and then let it out much louder than he'd intended to. Still no reply.

Sighing again, he swung himself to his feet and headed for the door.

"Good night, Kathryn," he said.

"Night, Chakotay," she murmured drowsily.

As the door whooshed shut behind him, he thought he heard just the hint of a giggle.

The bridge crew all looked at him inquiringly as he entered. He plastered on what he hoped was a reassuring smile and nodded slightly as he headed into the turbolift. Once the lift had halted, he walked quickly down the hallways, hoping he wouldn't run into any crewmen.

Luck was with him, and within moments he was punching in his keycode. Chakotay stepped into his quarters, securing the door behind him. For a moment, he wandered around the living room, glancing here and there as if unsure of what to do next.

And then, suddenly purposeful, he strode toward the replicator on the far wall and, just for spite, ordered a big, steaming mug of tea.