AN: Since I was on holiday, I worked on two one-shots.
1.2
Rachel was hideous, in her own eyes, anyways.
She's always been somewhat chubby, though it never bothered her that much. She was average weight, average height, and she found nothing wrong with her. Her nose was what made her special.
She was talented. What's not to like?
Then she sees that new notice (she's always looking out for them) on the board that fateful day, and immediately signs up because she knows that it will help her get out of this stupid no good town.
She sees the other names on the list and doesn't know them. They had to be nobodies, (the outcasts, the misfits) the ones who wanted to be noticed and like for it. She knows immediately that it's just another reason for the popular guys, the football players to throw slushies' at her face. But they would all work for her someday.
She finishes signing her name, adds a gold sticker (always, she thinks) and turns around, confidant, a smile on her face.
Then it comes.
She shuts her eyes immediately, safe in the knowledge that a little bit of cold won't stop this flaming fireball of talent.
She purses her lips though. The white sweater was the really expensive one, the one her dads got her a week ago.
But it doesn't matter. She can just tell them that someone accidentally poured it on her. Anyways; she can always just bleach it. She's always protected her parents from knowing she didn't have any friends.
She's lucky she's experienced and has a spare change of clothes in her locker.
She goes to the toilet to wash the cold drink out, then walks thorough the rest of school to glee rehearsal.
Days passed, she didn't keep track.
Then the "untouchable" quarterback stumbles into glee rehearsal that fateful day.
She'd always thought he was cruel, mean, and everything that was bad in a person he did throw a couple of slushies her way, though his face was somewhat-apologetic.
Then she saw through his actions and into the real person. Saw he was adorably clumsy and childlike in an innocent kind of way.
He was nice and humble and loyal too.
She doesn't know when the sparks ignite when he smiles, (which is too often) but it comes all too suddenly. She tries to deny it; prove the feeling in her heart was wrong, but it isn't.
So it was after the time when he was kissing her on the floor when she tries to get him to like her. Genuinely. She tries not to freak him out too much either.
(Too bad he ran away.)
She isn't that blind. She had approached him a few times, singing, ordering lunch. (she wanted to see if there was someone worth liking over the mask he wore over his face.)
He got this weird look on his face, and tried to avoid her, but she was too good.
He was scared.
Then, she finds out he has a girlfriend. A pretty blonde, smart and charming and manipulative, the unbeatable combination.
She brainstorms ideas to make Finn Hudson fall in love with her, like she did with him.
She finally ends up criticizing herself, something she's never done before.
She finds too many flaws; her nose is too awkward to make her seem pretty-something she never noticed before, her waist is too thick.
She considered asking her dads for a nose job, but she didn't want to be plastic.
So she tried everything in the book that wasn't, as she deemed, bad, but it didn't work. So she resorted to more desperate measures. Which is why she was in that bathroom that day.
She finds the idea of bulimia gross and dirty and messy, but she can't help it.
Vomiting always hurt, and the bile tasted horrible.
She just wants him to love her. She gives up everything she has, her heart, her soul, and her dignity. She is nothing, if not ambitious.
She is paid back with nothing.
So she's left with the sad feeling of exhaustion, and lets Finn and his oh-so-pretty cheerleading girlfriend kiss and hold hands in the halls.
She wonders, just how she lost to this green-eyed girl.
They don't notice her, solemn faced in the shadows, wishing she was the lucky blonde.
She concluded, that love was without mercy.
(She wanted him to feel the hurt and humiliation and embarrassment of falling in love.)
Please R&R even if it's shorter than my usual update…