A/N: I'm sorry Kaylee, I really am! While watching Phantom and talking about Attack on Titan, I mentioned how whenever I heard "Wishing You Were Somehow Here Again" I thought of Jean singing it to Marco. My friend was not amused. She can never listen to that song without crying anymore. I said I was sorry. Then proceeded to further her pain by writing this. I'm sorry, I swear! The song lyrics are in italics, words enclosed in ' ' are thoughts, regular quotations " " are spoken words.
Jean wandered into the graveyard where he knew his friend's memorial was. He had been burned, like the others, bt he had purchased a memorial headstone for him, feeling the need to do more for him. 'You were once my one companion . . .' He thought, as he wandered over to the small headstone. 'You were all that mattered . . .' He knelt down next to it, closing his eyes. 'You were once a friend and partner . . . then my world was shattered . . .' He sniffled a little as he set the flowers he had brought with him down against the headstone.
Wishing you were somehow here again . . . It seemed he was always doing that. Wishing you were somehow near . . . He sighed. "Sometimes it seemed," He said to the headstone, to Marco, really, "If I just dreamed, somehow you would be here . . ."
He laughed at himself for talking to someone who wasn't really there, who never would be. Wishing I could hear your voice again . . . Knowing that I never would . . . Still, he liked to think that, somewhere up there (Surely he was up there, and not down there. Marco was too sweet to be down there.), Marco could hear him. "I know . . . Dreaming of you won't help me to do all that you dreamed I could . . ."
Feeling restless, Jean stood, and began walking around the dark and quiet graveyard. 'Passing bells and sculpted angels, cold and monumental . . . Seem, for you, the wrong companions - you were warm and gentle . . .' He thought. Though this was more than most soldiers got, he still felt this was not right for Marco.
As he wandered back to Marco's grave, Jean felt tears begin to fall down his face, despite the fact that he had told himself he wouldn't do so this. That never worked anyway. 'Too many years fighting back tears . . .' He thought, letting the tears cascade down, unable to stop them now that they'd started. 'Why can't the past just die?' He asked himself, wondering why he still got so upset about Marco. 'If only . . . you were still . . .' He mused for what felt like the millionth time.
Wishing you were somehow here again . . . knowing we must say goodbye . . . It was so hard to move on past Marco, no matter how much he wanted to, no matter how much he knew Marco would have wanted him to. "Try to forgive . . . teach me to live . . . give me the strength to try . . ." He asked Marco, begged him. He couldn't do this on his own. He knew what he needed now. 'No more . . . No more memories, no more silent tears . . . No more gazing across the wasted years . . .' If only it was so easy.
"Help me say goodbye . . . Please . . . help me say goodbye . . ." Jean begged, falling onto his knees in front of Marco's headstone.