Fandom: Neon Genesis Evangelion
Title: Has No One Told You?
Author: Syra X/
Theme: #1 – Cold Hands
Pairing/Characters: ShinjixAsuka
Rating: PG
Disclaimer: Evangelion doesn't belong to me.
Summary: No one told Shinji.
a/n: consider this a small bonus for all of my awesome Devil & Saviour reviewers. DEDICATED TO Y'ALL! nyah, not my favorite, but I finally got it done. w00t!
-
Shinji only loves people with blue eyes. No, that isn't fair. He loves people with red eyes too- but Rei had blue hair. And Kaworu just didn't count. So maybe it's better to say that Shinji loves people with blue eyes the most. Of course, he has blue eyes too. But Shinji's no narcissist, he barely acknowledges that he's fond of his eyes. And if he is, there's only one reason why.
Because they're his mother's eyes. When he saw Yui during Instrumentality, all he noticed were her eyes. Aquamarine, but more blue than green, really. Not brown or black or soul-searing red. Blue like the sky and the sea and things that are calm and quiet and don't hurt anyone.
Maybe that's why he loves Asuka. No, that's unfair, too. He fell in love with her eyes first. Yes, that sounds right. When he met her on that ship in the middle of the ocean (so blue that day), he wasn't really looking at those long white legs or her fire-red hair. He didn't even really care that much when her skirt flew over Kensuke and Toji. All he could see were those pieces of sky set in her face, gleaming out at him.
Asuka's eyes were easy to fall in love with; she was harder. She was, in fact, the antithesis of her eyes, a complete 180 degree turn. The Second Children was cruel and harsh and loud and vain, and, he learned later, very, very, afraid. It is quite possible that he fell in love with Asuka because she was just afraid as he was; he couldn't love Rei who knew no fear and no pain and nothing at all, really.
He remembers holding her, once, as she shook and trembled and realized that Kaji was never coming back, and she had needed someone to hold. She yelled at him then, because he didn't hold her back, so stunned he was.
He's held her many times since, in many places, under many circumstances, but it has never ceased to be a miracle every time she melts into his arms, her head gently on his shoulder, Shinji supporting both their weight. These are the moments he can't help but store in his mind, a photo-collage of loving her.
Which explains the roses dangling in his arm as he tries not to break down. Misato turns to him, purple hair flying and blue eyes screaming 'I'm sorry, I'm sorry! I wanted to tell you but I couldn't find you.' Shinji ignores her, obeys the mantra of 'I mustn't run away' that he has ingrained in his psyche. The roses fall, forgotten, to the floor, as he grips her cold hand in his. No words, no words; he wasn't ever good at conversation. He just weeps and weeps over the blue eyes that won't ever open again, never ever. He dimly hears the click of Misato's heels as she exits, crushing the flowers underfoot. It doesn't matter. He'll never see the sky again. She is dead, she is dead. All is lost.
-fin-