"This was all Luke." Sookie's words rang in Lorelai's ears, louder than the music, louder than the chattering people around her.
Lorelai's own words echoed in her brain, words that demonstrated her blindness: "Every time I'm vulnerable or I say something or do something like the song, he doesn't do anything." Wrong, so wrong. Luke was constantly doing things, showing that his feelings were far beyond those of a friend.
He took her car shopping, yes, but more than that, he spent the rest of the day finding the car of her dreams, and insisted on tuning up her bike, and adding the horn. The blue cap he wore constantly, giving up the comfortable fabric tab of his brown cap for the hard plastic of the blue cap she gave him. He wore that cap all those years, and as soon as their friendship had returned, so did the blue cap. He went out of his way to give Rory a graduation gift when he wasn't even invited to the celebration. The look he gave her during the karaoke. He saw something in her eyes, heard something in her voice. What was her response? What did she say in the diner when Babette and Patty discussed the song? "It didn't mean anything." He must have overheard, no wonder he was annoyed. She had been blind to these demonstrations of his love and caring.
Rory's party was his biggest gesture yet. This gesture she would not ignore. This time it must be acknowledged, and done properly. Her heart beat faster, hoping for more. "Perhaps he had done this for her," a voice whispered in her head.
She glanced over towards the grill. No Luke. Seeing movement in the diner, she crossed the street just in time to meet Luke carrying a bag of charcoal.
"Hey."
"Hey."
Exhale. Breathe. Say what needs to be said.
"Thank you."
"Oh, it's … no big deal." Puffing his chest up a little, his pride was evident even as he dismissed this effort as nonchalantly as he did the chuppah.
Struggling to get any word out, her eyes began to shine with the emotion she could not express. "Luke."
He explained, "I just like to see you happy." Relieved to see the look in Lorelai's eyes, Luke smiled, his eyes softened which gave Lorelai the message she wanted to receive. They kissed.
"Come with me, it's too noisy out here," he said, and guided Lorelai into the darkened diner.
Once inside, they climbed the stairs to Luke's apartment. Closing the door, Lorelai turned to kiss Luke again, this time a kiss of reassurance, which Luke deepened into a more passionate embrace. Hiccuping sounds from Lorelai soon caused Luke to lift his head and look at her.
One arm around her waist, he placed his hand behind her head and looked into her eyes. Tears streaming down her cheeks, she held onto his shirt while she fought to gain control.
"Lorelai, my heart, what's wrong?" Luke began. "It's OK, it's OK."
"There's so much I didn't see, what you did for me, for Rory, for the three of us as a family, how could I have …" she broke off as he embraced her more closely.
"This is not the time for any of that; we made it through those dark days. We're moving forward now. We can have our middle," Luke said, caressing her hair as she slowly calmed down. They stood together, just holding each other, letting their heartbeats return to normal.
"You remember our middle?" Lorelai asked
"I remember our middle. I remember our beginning. I remember what it was like to hold you for the very first time." Luke took a halting breath. "I remember what it was like to hold you the last time. I remember the emptiness afterward. I remember."
Lorelai reached up and kissed Luke deeply, her desire to comfort him strong. "Remember this kiss now, remember it forever, it's the start of our middle."
Both weak in the knees from the emotion, they settled on Luke's familiar leather couch. The box poked Luke in the leg, and he reached into his pocket and removed it.
"I'd hoped to give this to you when I saw you again after the karaoke, but it didn't work out. It's…"
Lorelai interrupted him, speaking quickly. "Sorry, I'm so sorry, Luke, that day in the diner. Miss Patty and Babette were there, pushing me about the song. I blurted out the first thing I could think of to protect myself. Do you know Babette told me to go on upstairs?"
"Good for Babette, I wish you had come upstairs, we could have …" Luke started, but was again interrupted by Lorelai.
"The song was for you. It was real. It started out as a joke for Rory, but when I saw you, I, I, ... you mesmerized me. I couldn't stop." Lorelai let herself feel that moment again. She reached up and removed Luke's cap, twining her fingers in his hair, so short now, but still as soft as silk. She touched his mouth with her thumb, moved to caress his cheek, where the stubble, already growing long, betrayed how long he'd worked to make Rory's party a reality. Had he gotten any sleep at all in the past two days?
"I couldn't breathe; with your song you broke open a steel band that had choked my heart until I was hardly alive." With a small tremor in his hands, Luke opened the box and took out the necklace. As Lorelai reached to touch it, their fingers came together. The chain tangled, locking Luke's fingers to Lorelai's. Only when they clasped hands, palm to palm, did the chain release its captives.
Lorelai smiled, "It's beautiful."
"It's you," replied Luke.
Lorelai removed the gold necklace she was wearing and laid it on the table.
Luke opened the clasp of the necklace with the blue stones, moved Lorelai's hair to the side and closed the necklace around her neck. He bent down and dropped soft kisses along the back of her neck, causing Lorelai to shudder with excitement. He kissed the lace on her shirt, each tiny heart, one by one. She curved her back and leaned into him, reaching up and putting her hands around his neck. She moaned softly, arching her back even further.
Luke put his arms around Lorelai's waist, sliding his hands underneath her shirt, feeling the softness of her skin. His hands moved up slowly over her ribs, under the elastic of her top, cupping the bottoms of her breasts. She turned to face him and they pressed close together, her arms around his waist, his hands in her hair, kissing softly at first, then with increasing passion. Their lips parted and their tongues curved around one another, fueling the fire.
They stepped apart, breathing heavily.
"Do you want this, Luke?" asked Lorelai softly. He stepped forward, hands outstretched, then thought better of it and stepped back.
"Yes, oh dear God, yes!" he replied, his abdomen contracting with desire. "But only if it's right for you. Do you want to be with me?"
Lorelai groaned and practically threw herself on him. "Yes, Luke, it's all that I want. You, right now, making love to me."
They rushed to the bed, stripping their clothes off as they moved. There was no time to waste, nothing mattered but being once again connected in that most intimate of ways, feeling themselves whole again.
At the foot of the bed, they stopped. They were naked, their bodies and hearts were laid open, and there were no barriers between them. They trembled with desire and uncertainty.
Silently Lorelai took Luke's hand and guided him to the center of the bed, lying on his side, his left arm stretched above his head, his right arm lying at his side. Lorelai laid herself on the bed facing him, bodies just inches apart. Only their breath mingled.
The need and desire that Lorelai saw in Luke's eyes was unfathomable, yet he saw the same in her. Lying so close but not touching, they began by mirroring each other's actions: Lorelai's fingers light as a feather touching Luke's forehead, then his temples, gliding tenderly across his eyelashes, him kissing her fingers as they explored his mouth, finally resting on the pulse at the base of his neck. Luke followed her motions, step by step, until their arms crossed. They moved closer, not quite touching, just feeling the heat of the other's body.
They took turns kissing the other's necks, sliding down to the nipples, sucking, squeezing, moving faster until their bodies arched with desire. Luke's right hand clasped Lorelai's left and held it to his heart. They moved their hands lower, caressed the sensitive areas around their lover's hips, their legs touching gently at first, and then tangling together as the urge took over.
Lorelai fully closed the gap between her and Luke, who groaned as he felt her lower body meet his. She turned onto her back, pulling him on top of her. He braced himself with one arm, his legs between hers, and looked into her eyes. She smiled and wrapped her arms around his shoulders, whispering, "Now. Fill me. Love me. I've felt so empty for so long."
He moved slowly, watching every emotion flashing across her face. She opened her center to him and he pressed against her soft folds, and then moved deeper. Lorelai curved her hips upward involuntarily, turned her head to the side and closed her eyes. "Yes, Luke, yes, I love you, please don't let this end."
Overcome with emotion, Luke buried his face in her hair as his eyes became moist. "Lorelai," was all he could say, and even that came out from deep in his throat. He felt her heat, the soft skin enveloping him and knew he was home again. Raising his head to look her in the eyes again, he reassured her, "This is where we belong."
Luke's mouth covered Lorelai's, tongues darting in a dance of passion. At their center, they slowly began moving against each other, searching for that familiar rhythm, kissing and caressing every sensitive spot they could find. Luke began to move faster as Lorelai clutched his shoulders and strained for her release.
"Luke" she whispered desperately as his body rubbed against her clit, building the tension even higher. He began thrusting vigorously, calling "Lorelai!" in a rasping voice. She peaked, clamping down on him as he thrust even faster. Lorelai's spasms continued as Luke reached the top, shuddering as he gave in to her squeezing.
Panting and sweating, they collapsed together on the bed, still connected. Luke leaned on one elbow while he kissed Lorelai over and over again, caressing her hair, smoothing it back against her head, telling her he loved her over and over. Lorelai looked into Luke's eyes and answered every "I love you" with one of her own.
Exhausted and fully spent, Luke fell onto his back, sighing with happiness. Lorelai traced an imaginary line from Luke's belly button downward, searching out those places she knew would cause him to jump when she touched them, the afterglow of his orgasm. "Aaah!" he cried with a swift intake of breath as she found a spot. It was a tender, sweet agony. Moments later, the spot had moved and she laughed her Lorelai laugh as she found it again. Luke took revenge by kissing her still-throbbing clit, which caused her to press her knees together, reliving the moment. They wrestled, laughing, kissing, and enjoying the loving torture. Finally they collapsed on the bed in each other's arms and rested.
"Lorelai." Luke brushed the hair out of her eyes and shifted her to rest her head on a pillow he placed on his lap. He idly rubbed her temple with his fingers, first catching a lock of hair, then letting it escape through his fingers.
"Mmm?" Lorelai was watching his chest rise and fall with each breath.
"I don't need any more time. I'm sure it's right. Us. Now. Everything." He looked straight into her eyes, and Lorelai saw that he meant it.
"What about you, Lorelai?"
She felt her chest tighten. Was it fear? Was she the one who wasn't sure? Was she not ready this time? She closed her eyes and listened to her heart. A storm of memories flew around inside her head.
The chuppah. Luke taking Paul Anka to the vet late at night. "I just like to see you happy." The sound of his voice on the phone during those seven weeks they were separated. Rory's birthday parties, their dinners at Luke's, his soft "You do," as he told her he'll always be in her life.
Fixing the porch. Gluing Gilbert. The fights over Jess. Danish Day. His throaty "Yes" to her proposal. Rory as Pippi. Even those damn paint chips. The kiss. The other kiss. "I already told you that I already told you you can do this." My own cheesecake. Clothes shopping for Luke. Luke choosing my favorite outfits. The Twickham house. Kids and plants. His dark day. The horoscope.
Waltzing with Luke. The reconciliation date. Having a spat with a spatula. The only time he ever bought flowers. Painting the diner. Keeping her from killing Dean when he gave Rory her first kiss. The green dress. Luke in her bed. Luke in her heart.
A single tear slipped sideways out of her eyes.
"Lorelai? Are you asleep? Did you hear me?" Luke said with a touch of tension in his voice.
Her eyes fluttered open and met Luke's. "Name the day. I'm in. I'm all in."
