Hi. I'm writing something different for once.

I actually wrote this back in Apirl? May? I wrote this some months ago and decided to post it because why not. It's whatever. Plus, I found a catchy song and it gave me inspiration to write alot again.

Anywho, this is my first ever Sailor Moon fanfic. I hope I don't get any details wrong or anything... I'm not used to writing for this show (yet).

Let's see how this goes.

Disclaimer: I do not own Sailor Moon or the characters or the plot or anything, really.

xoxoxoxoxo

Usagi sighed to herself as she sat alone on a swing. She couldn't clear her mind, still lost in her thoughts of Mamoru. It wasn't fair.

The sun had set beyond the buildings and the city was still lit with streetlamps. It wasn't completely dark, but it felt somewhat colder.

She shivered, eyes downcast as she pushed herself back and forth with her heeled foot. She came up here to get her mind off of everything, and instead the opposite had happened.

Instead of being able to properly distract herself, she had fallen into a sea of thought, and Mamoru haunted her.

She couldn't escape it.

The park was on the roof of a building, and in that building there was a formal party. Everyone had attended, all of them ecstatic about freely enjoying themselves somewhere nice for a change.

In her group of friends, she guessed that Rei would be the only one aware of why she left. Everyone else, she made sure, didn't have a slight clue. Especially Mamoru, and she wanted to keep him, especially oblivious.

She told herself in the mirror before she arrived that no matter what happened, she wouldn't cry in front of him. She wouldn't let him ruin her mood. She would stand there, head up and brightly smiling, and she would have fun with her friends. She would enjoy her beautiful new dress, and she would make memories with the people she loved.

She would be strong, and she would be mature. She would be the adult he wanted her to be and show him that she wasn't childish anymore. Desperation led her to panicking, trying to find anything she could change about herself to bring him back, but all of her findings gave her a lump in her throat, and she was sure that if she let her mind wonder anymore, her makeup would ruin,

and she would be found out.

The door to the roof opened and she didn't think to hide. She just stared through the fence's chainlinks and scanned the stars for an answer to calm her nerves. Anything would do. Anything that made it all go away.

Chibiusa had to be born, it was destiny, right? So that would mean that when Mamoru said it was for their own good that they part ways…. that wouldn't change destiny would it?

There was a hand on her shoulder.

Usagi looked up, defeated and her eyes widened when she saw Mamoru.

"It pains me to see you so broken about this," he said quietly. "Dango-"

"I'm going home." Usagi said quietly, sitting up. She straightened her dress and walked past Mamoru with her dress in her hands, and she didn't dare look back. He frowned, putting his hands in his pockets.

"I didn't do it because I hated you."

"You changed fate," she said quietly, feeling her eyes water. Her initial plan had completely foiled. "You threw away everything we fought so hard for." She stopped walking and stood by the door, wiping her eyes. There was no stopping it now. She was crying.

"Chibiusa…."

"I had to, we were starting to-"

"To grow up. We had our problems, and it was too much for you."

Mamoru ran towards her. "I didn't let them go because I don't love you!"

"You're selfish."

The door shut. Mamoru blinked, exhaling. He knew it was for her own good that he didn't follow her, but the more involved they got, the more complicated everything around them seemed. He didn't want to trouble her for the rest of her life, nor himself. They were still young and he thought this was another way of maturing into an adult.

Learning to let go of the past. Moving forward to the future.

It had only been a few weeks ago… he had hoped she'd at least gotten over it by now, but he knew her better than that. It would take alot of time and he couldn't stand the fact that right now, she was feeling that way instead of having fun like he hoped she would.

Usagi was walking downstairs slowly, with little visions flashing in her mind.

Every moment they kissed, fought and protected eachother. Everything they worked so hard for, now disregarded. Fate was gone, destiny meant nothing to him, and she shivered again, still holding her dress.

She could hear everyone in the ballroom laughing and dancing. She heard them all make jokes and bicker with one another, and she understood that she had people there for her. She would never deny that.

Most of all, she could only think of Chibiusa…. she'd missed her so much, and now even that was just another dream. Her heart ached with nostalgia.

Being an adult meant learning to compromise and deal with your problems, not run away from them. She couldn't believe Mamoru.

Her footsteps became more frequent as she neared the end of the staircase.

Her makeup was a mess. She felt her face flush. There was no way she could return to the group, they would surely wonder about her, and she didn't want to trouble any of them. She thought up a good lie and decided to stick with that until she could collect herself and play pretend.

The door upstairs opened and her heart skipped a beat. Mamoru. "Usagi?" He called to her. She took off her heels and ran, stuffing her dress in her hands as she dashed through unknown hallways. She had to get away from him. She needed a distraction.

"Usagi! Usagi we need to talk!"

The future was gone and the past was full of big memories that held little worth to the man who helped make them. There was nothing to talk about. Adults moved on. Adults were mature enough to let go. Adults had big problems like this and adults had to face reality.

Setsuna had said so, herself that fate wasn't set in stone. Usagi had faced so many terrible situations where people have either died or gotten really hurt, and yet right now, the recollection of those worlds felt much much worse than anything she'd ever fought.

Any daimon, any witch or monster would never sting her the way the absence of Mamoru had.

She had broken down and was sitting on the floor with her shoes in her hands. Her pink ballroom dress had gotten wrinkled and her makeup was running down her cheeks.

Her blue eyes stared at the carpet patterns in the silence.

How had this happened? She felt like her life was a fairy tale meant for a happy ending….

Her niavity was ripped in half.

xoxo

"Bun head?"

Usagi opened her eyes and looked up. A concerned face was looking down at her.

"Haruka…?"

"It's not safe to just fall asleep in the halls like that." Haruka kneeled beside her wiping her cheek.

"You cried."

"It's not important." Usagi laughed lightly, wiping her eyes with the back of her hand. "It was just an accident. I was too tired from all the dancing."

"Dancing…?" Haruka rose an eyebrow. "I didn't see you dancing."

Usagi blushed, eyes widening. She waved her hands in front of her.

"OH I DANCED! I danced alot, and I got really tired and that's how I got here!" Her voice was a pitch higher than normal because she felt caught in a lie, and even though she knew it was bad, she didn't know how else to answer.

Haruka shook her head. "You're a terrible liar."

Usagi laughed loudly, shaking her head as she hit the carpet with her shoes in her hands. Then her laughter became awkward and quiet and she smiled widely at Haruka, as if her eyes weren't teary and her face wasn't clearly washed out.

Haruka shook her head, crossing her arms. Usagi lowered her head in dismay.

"Walk with me, Bun head."

Usagi nodded, carefully standing up. She thought to put her shoes on but decided against it.

She wasn't feeling well enough to try and walk in heels. Haruka tossed her suit jacket over her shoulder and moved forward.

Where to, Usagi wasn't sure of. She wondered if they would be leaving and prayed to anything that on her way out, she wouldn't see Mamoru. He didn't tell their friends about this, did he? She didn't like confrontation.

xoxo

The wind whipped through her hair. Haruka looked through the rear view mirror at Usagi and then turned to focus on Michiru.

"Why did you come to the party if you knew Mamoru was going to be there, Usagi?"

Michiru's voice was soft and filled with concern. None of the accusative hostility Usagi had been used to before, now that all of their differences were settled. Usagi wasn't used to it, but she answered anyways.

Or tried to.

"Because….,"

She clenched her dress tightly. The sky was dark and the moon was full and lit everything in a light blue. It gave her the confidence to speak.

"…I wanted to prove to myself that I was an adult."

Haruka shook her head.

"I was told you ran from the room, hid on the roof, and wouldn't talk to him about it when he tried to speak to you."

"Haruka!" Michiru snapped, staring at the driver. Haruka frowned at her as she turned a corner.

"It's not a mature way to act." She said matter-of-factly. Michiru crossed her arms and looked out of her window.

Haruka blinked a few times, gathering her thoughts before saying to Usagi, "My apologies. I'm coming on too harsh."

"It's okay," Usagi said quietly. "I need it."

Haruka didn't like the tone of her voice. It was out of character for someone like Usagi Tsukino.

She was unlike herself and it was scary how different she became over something like this. Michiru noticed too and they glanced at eachother, unsure of what to say.

The Usagi they knew from the beginning was always so hopeful and bright. She was always trying to find a better way to solve problems and was very tolerant.

She had her own way of handling things and overall, she did it with kindness. The same girl who once seemed so childish and innocent was reduced to this and it became apparent that this was nothing unusual for someone her age.

She was trying to deal with an adult situation in an adult way and they didn't know what to do.

xoxo

Haruka leaned against the wall of Usagi's house, looking Michiru in the eyes.

"Princess everything isn't herself."

Michiru nodded, frowning. "It's not like her to be so quiet…."

"It's not like her to be so dim. It's as though Mamoru took her spirit when he left her."

Michiru nodded again, looking directly at Haruka. "I can't imagine what she must be feeling….From what I heard, they had an important history together."

Haruka became annoyed. "He just leaves after everything without even a warning?! What kind of man does he think he is!"

Michiru grabbed Haruka's arm. "He did what he thought was best. It's normal for Usagi to feel this way about it, and there's nothing we can do. She just needs time."

Haruka shook her head, glaring. This wasn't justifiable. Usagi wasn't just another girl and Mamoru wasn't just another man. Her friends had all told her everything she needed to know about the two, and nothing made sense. None of his actions added up and it frustrated her.

She was getting ready to hunt him down herself, but Michiru's grip tightened.

"Tenoh…" she said softly. Haruka blushed, expression calming. Michiru stared at her with a concerned frown.

"We have to stay out of this… their personal lives aren't our business. You and I more than anyone should know what they must be feeling…. Things won't be this rough for Usagi forever, you know."

Haruka let her shoulders rest. She had tensed up without realizing it.

"It doesn't make sense, Michiru."

"Life never does…." Michiru frowned, looking away before smiling as her hand made it's way to Haruka's.

"sometimes the pain we experience can make way for much happier memories. This could be the thing to strengthen their bond together."

The possibility of that was pleasant, but unrealistic. They began walking to Haruka's car and they both looked back towards the house. Usagi was probably washed up and asleep right now. They would check up on her tomorrow.

xxx