Living

Juliet

With the absence of Starks presence, still haunts my lonely heart. Here in Chicago nothing has been the same without him. But I guess he's already forgotten about me. I was only his girlfriend for the last three years, but that doesn't matter when Zoey is involved. She's the blessed on, the one who's supposed to save us all. The one every guy falls for, the one who makes it incredibly hard to be anything special in this new vampire world.

I pushed myself up from the cozy living chair I had occupied for the last half hour. Whatever MTV movie played still in the background as I made my way out into the snow, it was quite today. Way to quite for a normal Saturday, but then again, all things crazy were happening in Oklahoma. A place I used to wish I could go to. To fallow him, but I apparently was forgotten on the first day of his arrival. The snow filled air blew my long chocolate hair around me, and I desperately tried to pull the cream cashmere sweater around myself.

"Juliet," a deep voice called making crunching sounds in the snow with their shoes. I glanced up just as Derek walked over, with his hands in his pockets and his hair caked in snow. Derek and I have been friends since long before either of us were marked. It was a pleasant surprise they day I was to find him here waiting for me with the open arms my dad didn't offer me. "I heard about HIM," Derek smiled at me, but it never reached his eyes.
"It's okay, I was just forgotten and replaced with Zoey Redbird, she pretty important these days," tears threaten to fall out of my blue eyes but I pushed them away like I always do. Derek saw right through my attempt to make it a joking matter, but instead of calling me out on it, he simple pulled me close and let me do the whole ten seconds of crying I would allow myself, once I was done he held me at arm's length and smiled.

"You don't need to pretend with me Julie, he loved you long before her," I scuffed at the thought.

'Yea if he loved me, he wouldn't have jumped right into her slutty arms," and with that I turned around and headed back into the warmth and comfort of my dorm lobby. Derek fallowed knowing I wasn't directing the anger to him, just simple at him. The room was still quite as Derek and I made our way up the stairs to my room. Opening the door is like a slap in the face of what I no longer have. There are pictures of us all over my walls in a sort of museum way. It was sweet when I walked in on my seventh birthday to find him covered in glue and trying to get over six hundred pictures of us up on my wall. I remember smiling and telling him I loved him.

I closed my eyes stopping the tears from falling, I would not cry in front of someone twice in one day.

"Juliet," Derek sighed running a hand through his light brown hair, he looked semi appalled at all the pictures of us together.

"I can't take them down yet, maybe when I know that everything is over, maybe," I sat down on my bed and pulled my pick fuzzy pillow into my lap and pressed my cold face into its protective comfort. Derek sat down next to me with pleading eyes.

"Jul, come here," Derek pulled me back into his arms and I rested my head on his shoulder. Is it wrong to think of someone else, when you're in a man's arms? If it is I'm the worst person ever. I remember that first night, the first night I met him.

I was just sitting there in the hallway studying in the peace and quietness of the deserted hallway. When this boy walked out, he had this thing about him that screamed notice me I'm worth it. So I looked at him, his eyes found mine and he smirked at me. And I smiled at him, I closed the textbook and stood up, I reached my hand out to him and told him my name. he told me his, then I walked him to dinner with him making me laugh, and making weird faces like any other fifteen year old boy would. I would laugh and gently push his away even though I secretly wanted to have him close. It went on like this all the way though the dinner line, and through the rest of dinner he asked me all kinds of questions, and I simply answered them. I thought he was perfect.

I must have fallen asleep and Derek must have tucked me into bed. Because I woke up the first time around one p.m., but the dream that fallowed that was so… well, weird.
The island was beautiful, it was perfect, it was the perfect place to be. But that was before I saw the big winged man step out of the shadows. He spoke to me in a language I didn't know I knew. It was nice, he was perfect to. But it was what he told me that scared me. He told me if I helped him with my ability I could have Stark, and I wanted to say yes, I wanted to tell him yes, but something stopped me, and that happened to be my phone.
Hey movie tonight after school –Derek-

I groaned knowing I would have to go; otherwise Derek and my other friends would think I hated them or something because these last six weeks have been hell without him, hell in every way.

I was clearly not going back to sleep anytime soon, so I pulled the blanket off me and swung myself out of my bed. Sydney my beloved roommate slept soundlessly in the bed across from mine. Almost like I was five seconds ago, but instead of dwelling on the thought that my tight sleep schedule had been so rudely interrupted I sat down at my lap top and thought of something to say to my mom.

Dear mom, I typed.

I think about picking up the phone and calling you every day. But you and I both know I can't. It would go against dad's wishes of me still thinking of you all as my family, as the only thing I could count on. I know he was just mad that he was losing me too after Jim's death; I knew he thought the same thing would happen to me. But every once in a while, I'll forget I can call you and I'll punch your number into my cell and wait until you answer. Then when you do I remember and pretend I'm calling for Sarah, or Emily, some random name I could think of so you wouldn't worry so much about me.

I sat staring at the short but thoughtful email I would send my mother, but after much thought I simple held down the backspace button and I would try again another time. I glanced over at the alarm clock Sydney and I share, it's not even close to three yet, and here I am wide awake, so instead of logging on to facebook or reading some book on my nook, I pulled out my hot pink journal, the one that I filled with things about Stark, the one I told everything to since I lost what little family I had left four years ago. A family that I thought I could get back with Stark but after killing his mentor and running off to Zoey I realized just how messed up that fantasy really is. Sighing I opened it up to page one, but before I even started reading it I snapped it shut and returned it to its rightful place under my old history textbook. I pushed myself away from my desk and stared at the clock for a good ten minutes before I found myself back in bed and the comforter over my head.

I was back on the island; the sun was up and warming my chilled skin. I'm wet, and I do believe I went swimming in this really nice dress. My wet hair clung to my bare shoulders has HE stepped into the sun with me. His black wings were so perfect I wanted to run my fingers through the feathers on them. His body was even more memorizing. He was soo perfect. So perfect indeed I found myself staring at him waiting for him to say something.

"Juliet," he breathed stepping closer to me. His musical voice drifted through the trees as the wind danced around our ankles.

"Yes," I looked up at him as he ran a hand through my hair, he bent down and his lips brushed my ear. "Juliet, I need to help me," he breathed. He sounded so perfect I told him the one thing I wanted to.

"Yes," I breathed as his lips hit mine, I didn't care that my whole body screamed for me not to. But that didn't matter I wanted to. I broke the kiss and glanced up at him. "What do I need to do?" I asked as he wrapped his strong arms around me.

"You need to figure that out for yourself, but when you do tell me." I smiled up at him as he began to fade. I knew I would be waking up any moment.

"Juliet." Derek's voice spoke as I came out of dream land, his voice was so nice to listen to I almost forgot about that weird dream I had just had. Opening my eyes I found his dark brown ones. I smiled at him as he smiled back. It was a well deserved smile since he was here in his PJ pants and no shirt. And he looks nice, but I can't think that.

"what's up?" I asked rubbing the sleep from my eyes.

"Well I need your help tonight, I know I invited you to a movie but I need to wash a bunch of dog for my mom, so she can take care of my little brother tonight.

"Derek, where's the other but I hear coming." Derek chuckled as he fallowed me into the bathroom.

"But I need you to help me; I can't wash all those dog by myself." I looked at him with a "What the hell" look. "And, your a god friend I promise to take you to journeys to get you those new boat converse you wanted?" he raised his eye brows at me with a small smile on his face.

"Fine but your taking me to dinner as well." I told him as I pushed his gently out of the bathroom. But instead of leaving he stepped back in.

"See I knew you'd understand, so it four o'clock and were skipping school, so I'll be back at say six," he kissed me on the side of the head and left the bathroom shutting the door behind him.

"Boys" I sighed.

Stark's fingers played with the curls at the back of my neck as I slept soundlessly. We had been friends for a little over a month and I already felt like I've known him my whole life. He's sweet musky scent filled my nose as I breathed in deeply turning my head to look at him.

"Morning," he breathed looking down at me. His dark hair fell in his eyes as I pushed myself up and into a sitting position.

"How did you get in here without someone screaming." I whispered since it wasn't even noon yet.

"I couldn't sleep, and knew you wouldn't mind if I laid here with you in your bed," he smirked at the double meaning in his words and I rolled my eyes and pushed him off the bed.

"Lets just go watch a movie okay?" I asked getting up to find some longer shorts. I could feel his eyes on me, and I could hear him move, but I didn't know he'd spin me around and press his sweet lips to mine. Masking any other thought from my head as our lips pressed against each other. I pulled away from him and looked in the eyes. "What does this mean?" I asked as his forehead leaned on mine.

"Dunno, but it lets not over think it." He pressed his lips to mine again as I dropped the shorts I was holding so I could wrap my arms around him, he pulled me closer taking my second kiss, since he had the first just moments before. We kissed until late into the day. And afterword's my lips were swollen and red, clearly showing signs I've been making out with someone all afternoon, so instead of going to school Stark and I stayed in my bed talking, I didn't quite yet have a roommate so we didn't have to worry about that. He told me all about his family all about his classes, the ones we weren't in together. He would tell me everything. And then we would kiss some more, and I would laugh and tell him that my lips hurt. And he would chuckle and kiss me again as if that would make it better.

I closed my eyes as the warm water rushed over my head masking the two whole tears I let roll down my check, I loved him and he threw me away faster then he kissed Zoey, which by the way happened on like the same day. I shut off the water wrapped myself in a big fluffy towel and walked back into my room leaving little wet footprints behind me. I turned on my iPod thinking maybe music would help me not think of Him, or that hansom bird winged man.

"The way you move is like a full-on rain storm

And I'm a house of cards

You're the kind of reckless that should send me running

But I kinda know I won't get far."

I started to sing along with my iPod.

"And you stood there in front of me

Just close enough to touch

Close enough to hope you couldn't

See what I was thinking of."

I sang I danced into my faded dark blue skinny jeans, and I slipped on my "num num" t-shirt. And placed my grey jacket with the cute buttons and the little belt, I then put on my pink scarf and black fuzzy boat with my grey fingerless gloves. Satisfied with the way I looked I finished drying my hair and brushed on some makeup before I sat down picking up my abused copy of Alice in wonderland. That's what I was doing when Derek swung open the door and stepped in. He smirked at me as I closed the book and joined him by the door. He grabbed my hand in mine as we began the long journey of sneaking out.

It took us forty-five minutes until we were safe and sound in my 2008 Toyota Camry, every since we had a huge outburst last Christmas of students trying to get to the big sale at the mall. But ever since then you have to use these passes you get each month and Derek and I had already used up all of our passes. Snow crunched under my tires as Derek pulled out on to the rode. It would normally take us ten minutes to get to Derek's house, but with all this snow, I'd give it an hour.

After much arguing on the fastest way to get there and many, many, many, radio station changes they arrived in front of the two story white picket fence house that Derek returns to each chance he gets. His mom stood there with a big smile on her face as Derek stepped out of the driver side of the car. His mom threw her arms around him telling him she couldn't wait until he changed so he could come home longer, and then she moved to me.

"Oh Juliet, you're always welcome here," she squeezed me almost too tightly but it was nice. I hugged her back and pressed my face into her warm red sweater. It smelled like apple pie.

"I know Sarah." She let me go and turned her attention back to Derek. Derek blushed as his mom ushered us inside.

"So don't be mad at me Der." Sarah said as Jack Derek's little brother rounded the counter and wrapped his little five year old arms around her. Jack looked just like Derek, same light brown messy hair and dark brown eyes. They're the same sun kissed color, but yet still clearly white.

"Mom," Derek growled.

"I lied, you're never home... I just wanted you home." Sarah placed an hand on Derek's shoulder.

"Mom, we skipped school for this," he growled looking over at me. His deep eyes stared into mine, telling me was truly sorry about all of this. I just smiled and nodded letting him know I don't mine spending the evening with his family. It would be nice to get my mind off things.

The evening went well, we played twister, (which I won,) and apples to apples, (which Jack won) and we watched the Hangover after jack went off to bed. Derek and I stayed well into the night it was almost one when we got in the car to head back. We figured we could make it in time for our last classes.

"I had fun, and I think we have two tickets left from November we didn't use." I told him as I looked through all the stuff in my glove-department. I pulled out two orange-red tickets and Derek and I shared a small smile.

"Thanks, you didn't have to stay, I could have had my dad drive me back," Derek said as he pulled into the parking lot.

"And leave you with out a ticket, I don't think so." I said smugly. Derek chuckled as he got out of the car, I fallowed close behind and slipped the ticket into his hand. We handed the guards our tickets, and the nodded us in. we then made our way to our separate classes since he's a year ahead of me.

The rest of the evening went by in a blur and I once again found myself alone in the library which is way to quite.

"hey Stark, do you think we'll be able to find the last Harry Potter book in here": I asked a fifteen year old Stark and he looked on the shelf next to me. He didn't say anything as he pulled out a big thick hardback book with a green background. The truth is this isn't the last harry potter book, but it's the last one I need. My mom got me the last one not knowing I didn't have this one. Stark smiled at me about to answer my previous question.

"Oh I do believe we will find it."

"Smart butt." I told him.

"Don't you cuss?" he asked kissing my check. I rolled my eyes at him as his hand found mine.

"No, I told you. I don't find cussing very amusing."I told him as he chuckled beside me. I checked out the book and tucked it into my backpack. Stark never got why I carried it around, but it saves me from having to carry a purse which is always nice, because two bags is too much.

The tears didn't come, as I knew they wouldn't. But that didn't mean the pain didn't come either. Because it did, anything Stark related hurt, that's why I knew I needed to talk to him. So with out really thinking which is so unlike me I pulled out my phone and pressed his name on my Samsung seek.

"Hello?" his deep voice said into the phone.

"Stark it's me, Juliet we need to talk."