A/N: Another story. Yup. I really don't know what to say...well, I'll talk more at the end.

Disclaimer: Sigh. You'd be pretty dull in the head if you thought I owned the Artemis Fowl characters. Pssshh. Yeah right.

Title: A Random Cookout

Chapter 1: Chapter 1

Hello and welcome to a random cookout that I am forcing Artemis to have.

"You can't make me do anything! I'm my own person!"

Yes, but I, dear Artemis, am the author.

"Good point."

Which means I can force you to snog me! Muahahahahahaahahaha!

"NNNOOOOO!"

Anyways, on to the story.

- - - - -

Artemis was sitting at a gigantic barbeque pit, waiting for people to arrive. Yes, he was forced to have a cookout.

Holly was the first to come.

"Hey! You look bored. When more people get here, we can play a game, or something," Holly suggested.

Artemis looked up from his hands (yes they are so interesting), and nodded his head.

Foaly came next.

"Why do we look so glum, Artemis? Cheer up. It's your cookout."

"Don't remind me."

Eventually, the rest of the group showed up. Butler, Juliet, Root, Trouble, and Grub all sat down around the gigantic pit.

"So, shall we take Holly's suggestion and play a game?" asked Artemis to the general crowd.

Everyone seemed to find that a good idea, so then they started thinking of games.

"Let's play truth or dare!" said Holly suddenly. Artemis doubted this would turn out well.

"Okay, I'll go first," said Holly. "Hmmm...FOALY! Truth or dare?"

"Erm...truth, I suppose," said Foaly, a slight quiver in his voice.

Holly nodded. There was silence as she tried to think of what to ask Foaly. Finally she got something.

"Foaly, how many bottles of hoof moisturizer have you used in the past month?"

"Um, I think about two," said Foaly casually. At least that wasn't a very scarring question, he thought.

"Okay...I pick Root," said Foaly. "Truth? Or DARE?"

Root began to fume and got up and said he would just leave for a minute.

Everyone seemed to think that was fine.

"Foaly, pick a new person," suggested Trouble.

"Okay then! I pick...ARTEMIS!"

Artemis sighed. He supposed this couldn't be avoided.

"Truth or Dare?"

"I pick...truth," said Artemis finally. Artemis didn't like dares. You never knew what you might have to do.

"Okay, then..." said Foaly. "Ummmm... Who's your secret crush?" he said finally. Foaly smirked. Now that was a scarring question.

Artemis went back to staring at his hands.

"C'mon, Artemis, tell us." prodded Foaly. "You were the one who picked Truth."

Artemis let out an overly exasperated sigh. "Must I say it?"

"YES!" everyone shouted.

"Well then..."

All heads leaned forward, straining to hear. They could tantalize him with this all his life. They had to know.

"...I LOVE YOU HOLLY!" shouted Artemis suddenly, and proceeded to glomp her.

"I LOVE YOU TOO, ARTEMIS!" she shrieked.

And then apparently the cookout had ended, seeing as everyone except Holly and Artemis backed away slowly.

End

Hey there. I know I said I'd talk more at the end, so here goes.

This story was odd, random, and a one-shot. I will not be updating this.

My other story, A Long Way From Sanity, will be updated when I feel like it.

I will try to update Pony Ride! soon.

I Am Lacking A Better Title might not be updated for a while, but don't lose hope. I will continue it eventually.

I will soon be putting out a poem, maybe, about...well...you'll find out soon enough.

My Neopets story should be coming out soon.

I am also going to write a Pong story that may or may not be co-written by one of my best friends.

Seeya!

The Insane Lugian