"Ladies and gentlemen! It is my extraordinary pleasure to welcome you to the final bout of the Duel Monsters World Championship! You've seen our challenger fight her way to the top with the most unlikely deck of all, but can she come face to face with the World Champion?"

The announcer's voice sounded faker than ever before. I'd been listening to him all day, shouting himself hoarse every time numbers and monsters got big enough. I'd thanked my lucky stars that he wasn't doing color commentary, or I'd have given in and gone home by then. What would they have said about me then? Me, a no-name last-minute entry who somehow toppled one regional champion after another, getting up and leaving right before the big game. Up until now, I'd bet everyone in that crowd was just waiting for my hot streak to burn itself out. They wanted to see someone big go up against the champ, have a real clash of the titans, but then this pale, weedy girl comes out of nowhere and makes fools of them all.

I stood up and stretched, my ass feeling sore from the bench, and then felt around for my duel disk. They gave me a fancy, tournament-exclusive model. Smooth edges and rounded bits, like those pretty little numbers they've got at the academies. I thought about the ratty, buggy KC piece of shit I had sitting under my bed back home. I was hoping they'd let me keep this big-shit duel disk if I lost, since my old one would never display Xyz monsters right.

The tournament disk was heavy, but it fit my deck and arm like a dream, with a neat little automatic shuffle and draw system. It even had a fancy holograph interface for picking cards from the deck and checking out monster stats. As far as I knew, these hadn't even been released to the general public yet, and the palms you'd have to grease to get one were way beyond my means. I held it up close to my chest as I made my way out of the prep room, feeling the camera's gaze on me as I left. The tournament kept eyes on you no matter where you were or what you were doing, and I guess it's hard to blame them when five hundred mil's on the line. We had to sign a big waiver before getting in, so that no matter what – if you were pissing, reading, whatever – we'd have a camera on us to make sure we weren't doing anything shady. I'd bet the duel disk had some anti-tampering gear, too, and they probably had a lock on my deck to make sure I didn't sneak anything in or out during the game.

I'll be honest, I didn't know anything about the champion. Not like it was really my fault; the guy was as reclusive as they come, and there was all this legal shit about releasing recordings or details of his final duel. I don't know if the guy just didn't like attention, he wanted to keep his strategies secret, or what. All I had were rumors, and they weren't any help since everyone who claimed they were at the tournament said the champ had the most powerful card they'd ever seen. I didn't believe half of what they said about it, and most of it's hardly worth repeating, but it worried me. Not a single person I talked to had anything skeptical to say about the champion. I went into this knowing I might end up like Icarus, but I'd have been happy for just that moment in the sun.

Then it was back out into the crowd, a million voices all shouting for me and the mysterious world champion. The arena was like a tennis court, big and expansive. The corners were covered in fancy holography arrays that could interface with the duel disks, making all the attacks bigger and louder. Sometimes they'd even make the monsters move around and face the crowd when a turn was dragging on, and once or twice I thought I heard one talk. I wasn't a foot out the door before a bunch of boys in white shirts were making sure I was mic'd and straightened out. Nobody could keep me from looking like a scruffy punk, but they sure tried.

"We've kept you waiting long enough, and it's time to find out! Ladies and gentlemen, on the red side, our challenger – Kimberly O'Leary!"

The crowd erupted. There wasn't enough cheering or derision for me to make it out one way or the other, just a wall of sound that slammed into my ears and made me hate that fucking announcer all the more. I played my part, spreading my arms above my head and nodding at the crowd like they owed me something. New eardrums, maybe.

The lights went out, leaving me in the pale glow cast by the holography arrays. The crowd was pretty freaked out, but a few of them were already cheering like they knew what was up. The champion had pulled this routine before. The announcer cut in just in time to stop a panic.

"Ladies and gentlemen, feast your eyes on the blue side! I give you the Duel Monsters World Champion... Shinichi Kanzaki!"

The arena lit up, forcing me to squint my eye along with most of the rest of the crowd. I brought my hand up out of reflex, bumping my nose against the hard metal of my duel disk and making me cough. I hope nobody saw it, seeing as how I looked like a total klutz.

When my eyes stopped stinging, I brought my hand down and checked my nose. No bleeding, thank god. I didn't want them to think the champ had gotten to me just yet. I looked first to the far end of the arena, and then to the big screens lined up above each set of seats. There he was – the Duel Monsters world champion, the mystery man who everybody said had a totally unstoppable card. I don't know what I was expecting, but it wasn't what I got. I stared at the screen for longer than I should have, expecting some kind of big reveal, but nothing happened.

Shinichi Kanzaki was the most normal-looking guy I'd ever seen. Button-up shirt and jeans, brown hair in slightly better shape than mine, and a completely unremarkable face. He was the sort of guy you'd walk by in the street and hardly even notice. Standing opposite to me, all platform boots and leather, I looked like a traveling circus.

"Before we begin, do either of our brave competitors have something to say?"

Shinichi waved a hand and then motioned to me. There was a buzz in my ear, letting me know my mic was on. Bastard had put me on the spot, and my mind raced for something that sounded cool. I took in a breath, straightened my stance, and nodded in his direction.

"There's only two ways this can end."

The crowd cheered, and I couldn't keep myself from grinning. The announcer piped up again.

"Bold words. I think it's time to see for ourselves! Ladies and gentlemen, it's time for the moment you've all been waiting for. Would the competitors please ready their duel disks?"

I held my arm out and horizontal. I was used to the weight, by now. The card-zones snapped out of either side with loud clack! The life-point display flickered to life just above the deck: 8000.

"And now, without further ado, it's time to duel!"

The holoprojector on the top of my duel disk hummed – it was my turn. Five cards were dispensed into my hand with a whirr from the auto-draw system, and I brought them up to my face. "Not bad," I muttered, just loud enough for the microphone to pick up. "Alright, I'll set this monster in face-down defense position and end my turn." I had no idea what to think of Shinichi, so I stayed on the defensive. If his monsters were all so unstoppable, I figured he wouldn't see any problem in attacking. A giant, horizontal facedown card appeared before me, casting a shadow on the ground beneath it.

"I draw," stated Shinichi. His voice was low, but what struck me most was how calm he was. He didn't have the whole cold, emotionless shtick going on, either. In fact, he almost sounded bored. "I've watched your duels, you know." He went on, looking at me instead of his hand. "You've gotten this far because you've been underestimated, you and your cards."

"You might be right," I answered, playing it cool. I swept a lock of hair back behind my ear, doing my best to make it look like the World fucking Champion wasn't worth my time. "What of it?"

Shinichi gave me that weird little smile of his. "I wonder how you'll do against someone who knows what you're capable of." Before I could reply, his hands were in motion. "I set one monster in face-down defense position and set two cards as well. Your move, Miss O'Leary."

"Alright, I draw." I tried not to sound as annoyed as I was. Shinichi was right. Between me and my cards, the regional champions thought I was some kind of joke. When the tables turned, I'd caught them off guard, each one thinking they'd figured me out until I pulled off something new.

I turned over the card I'd just drawn – Shinichi was going to make my life hard if he didn't go on the offensive. I was expecting a bolder play from the World Champion, but if he'd figured me out as well as he seemed to think, he'd force my hand sooner or later. "I'll set one more card facedown," I declared. "It's all you, Shinichi."

Shinichi chuckled, drawing his next card. "I was glad you made it this far. You proved how easy it is to dupe a professional player, but now you're starting to disappoint me." I wanted to retort, but he kept going. Before he did, I noticed how quiet the crowd had gotten. He had their total attention. "If you keep treating me like the regional champions, this is going to be even easier than I thought. I'll flip my facedown monster – A Cat of Ill Omen!" The air shimmered and a fat, fluffy black cat covered in golden jewelry appeared. "Its special ability allows me to take one trap card from my deck and place it on top." The holodisplay on his duel disk popped up, and he selected a card I didn't recognize.

The cat had pathetic attack and defense, but I wasn't in a position to take advantage of it. It sat there, staring at me with those big, red eyes. I never liked cats, and I was hating this thing the more I learned about it.

"The clock is ticking, Miss O'Leary. I'm one card away from victory." There was that tiny smile again, paired with a look in his eyes that made me want to punch him square in the face. "Your move."

"Draw!" I didn't know what he had planned, but I needed to act. As luck would have it, the card I'd drawn was exactly the one I needed. "Don't count me out so quickly, huh? This duel hasn't even started yet." I get a little corny when I'm in the moment, so what? The habit fits in just fine. I pulled my newest acquisition from my hand and slid it into one of the slots at the bottom of the duel disk.

"I'll activate this spell card – Creature Swap!"

Shinichi quirked a brow.

"Our monsters exchange sides," I explained. "That means that I'll be taking that black cat." In a flash, I was staring at the back of Shinichi's cat, while my set card was sitting on Shinichi's side of the field. He didn't seem impressed, pulling up a holodisplay to examine the new card in his possession.

"Interesting. Is that all, Miss O'Leary?"

"Far from it!" Shinichi's tone hadn't changed once, bastard let me believe I had the upper hand. I practically slammed my next card down onto the duel disk. "I summon Junk Synchron, in attack mode!" My favorite little chunky machine popped into being beside the cat, buzzing and hopping around.

"But he won't be around long. I'll tune him to your black cat, in order to synchro summon..." He was gone in a flash, an array of green rings flickering into being in his place. My old KC rig always fucked this part up, and it'd been ages since I'd seen it in full. The rings whirled around Shinichi's black cat, turning it into a glowing yellow silhouette that shot skyward. The silhouette split, turning into a pair of gleaming stars. I loved this part, but I couldn't enjoy it. My eye was on Shinichi, watching his face. He wasn't even looking, staring right into his hand as a column of light shot through the stars, bringing my monster with it.

There he was. My best buddy in the whole deck – a mass of icy spikes branching out from some kind of metal breastplate, topped with a rounded helmet that had two mean red eyes staring out of it.

"...Frozen Fitzgerald!"

I could hear the crowd again, hooting and cheering. Whatever spell Shinichi had put on them, my flashy summon was starting to lift it. Everyone's eyes were on frozen demon, which loomed over the field like the specter of death itself. For a few moments, I felt like a real badass.

That's when I realized that Shinichi was almost snickering, and I lost my temper. "What's so funny?!"

"Frozen Fitzgerald," he repeated. "You used that card in your last duel, didn't you? Its special ability prevents me from activating any cards when it attacks. It's the strongest card in your deck, wouldn't you say?"

I glowered. "What's your point?"

Shinichi shrugged. "Nothing. I'm surprised to see it so early, though. You're not getting desperate, are you?"

"I'll show you desperate!" I snapped. "Frozen Fitzgerald, attack his face-down monster! Gale of doom!" And just like that, a gust of icy wind whipped through the arena, forcing the card face-up and encasing it in a block of ice. They could only see it for a moment – it was short, with a spindly little body and a great big head, deep blue skin that stood out under the ice. It had all gone according to plan. "Recognize that card, Shinichi?"

"Ojama Blue," Shinichi answered. "You caught a lot of tournament players out with this one too, didn't you?"

"That's right! And when she's destroyed by battle, I get to add two 'Ojama' cards from my deck to my hand. Talk about victory all you like, Shinichi. Everything's going to plan over here." The holodisplay popped up, and I selected my cards. With a buzz, they were shoved out of the deck, and I slipped them triumphantly into my hand. "And that's my turn. Still think I'm running out of options?"

Shinichi didn't answer, drawing his next card. He'd wasted a draw digging up his trap card, and with Frozen Fitzgerald on the field I hardly needed to worry. Sure enough, he didn't do much. "I set two cards facedown and end my turn."

It was my turn to laugh, and I tilted my head to make sure the cameras caught my smirk. "You haven't forgotten about Fitzgerald's effect already, have you? All the set cards in the world won't make a difference." I drew my next card, barely even glancing at it. I'd been waiting for a chance to gloat the whole duel.

"On the contrary, Miss O'Leary..." There Shinichi went, ruining my moment. "I might not be able to activate cards when Frozen Fitzgerald attacks, but there's still the rest of your turn. And I think I'll start with this one – Metal Reflect Slime!" One of his set cards lifted up, and something slithered out of it; a blob of shimmering, reflective stuff, like mercury. The way it shifted and twisted made my eyes hurt, and it plopped right down in front of Fitzgerald like it was no big deal. "When Metal Reflect Slime is activated, it summons itself onto the field as a monster. Make a note of its defense – your overgrown snowman doesn't have a prayer of destroying it."

It only took a glance at my holodisplay to confirm what he said. Fitzgerald's 2500 attack was nothing to sneeze at, but Shinichi's wad of ooze had a whole 3000 defense. There weren't many monsters in the game that could topple something like that with brute force, so it looked like I'd been stopped dead in my tracks. I bit back a few words that would've gotten me disqualified, and gave him a look. "Fine. I'll set this card facedown, and that's all. Looks like it's your move, Shinichi."

Shinichi drew, smiled, and looked back up at me. "I had my hopes for a longer bout, Miss O'Leary, but I'm sad to say that you've been hardly a challenge." He plucked a card from his hand, and dropped it down onto the field. I figured this was it – maybe he'd mop the floor with me and Fitzgerald, but at least I'd be able to see what this big, unstoppable monster is. Lawsuits be damned, I'd blog my ass off when I got home.

"I summon Tour Guide from the Underworld, in attack mode!" I'd seen this card before, she was a favorite with the bigtime players. A purple-haired girl in some kind of demon pantsuit with a purse and a creepy laugh – I never got used to that laugh. "As you well know, Tour Guide from the Underworld lets me summon another level three fiend-type monster out of my deck." Yet another purple-haired girl appeared on the other side of the shining Slime. They couldn't hope to handle a blow from Fitzgerald, but it didn't take a genius to tell that Shinichi wasn't done.

"I hope you're ready, Miss O'Leary, because this is where our duel ends. I activate the spell card – Galaxy Queen's Light!"

"What the hell does that do?" One of the referees gave me a dirty look.

"Galaxy Queen's Light lets me select one monster on my field, and change the levels of all other monsters I control to match it." Shinichi sounded ready to burst out laughing.

"But your two monsters are the same level already. Is this some kind of joke?"

"You're forgetting about Metal Reflect Slime, Miss O'Leary. Even though it's a trap card, as a monster on the field it's level ten!"

Shit.

"So, you're..." I must've looked like somebody hit me with a brick. Going to all that trouble to get three level ten monsters could only mean one thing; "You're going to Xyz summon!"

Shinichi had dropped any pretense of toying with me. "That's right, Miss O'Leary. I'll construct the overlay network with these three cards!" A spiraling red portal exploded onto the stadium, reducing the monsters to glowing balls of light and dragging them inside. "Behold, my most powerful card – Superdimensional Robot Galaxy Destroyer!"

By the time he finished saying the name, it was already staring me down. Fifty feet of blue and purple metal looking like something out of the fucking Power Rangers. My holodisplay gave me numbers I didn't like – 5000 attack, 2000 defense. There was no easy way to say it, but Fitzgerald and I were about to be in a world of hurt.

"I hope you're as honored as you should be, Miss O'Leary. There aren't many people in the world who get to see the full power of my deck."

I grit my teeth. If I didn't bite back, I'd look like a real chump. I tucked my hair behind my ear again, loosening up. I forced a smile. "So, this is the unstoppable card everyone's been talking about? Gotta say, Shinichi, I'm not impressed."

"Oh, and why is that?"

Damn it, why is that? I searched my hand and field for something, anything that I could bluff with. That's when I caught it – I still had a trap card facedown on the field! Shinichi wouldn't dare kill his crowd-pleaser over a little trick like that, would he? "Because big numbers don't mean anything. Go ahead, attack – if you really want to risk my trap card."

Shinichi was unfazed. "Oh, did I forget to mention Galaxy Destroyer's special ability? By detaching one of its Xyz materials, I can destroy every spell and trap card you control." One of the little balls of light orbiting around Shinichi's sentai wet-dream disappeared, and it turned its face toward me. At times like that, it's easy to forget that they're all holograms. Staring down that giant machine was one of the scariest things I've ever done in my life, and it didn't help when it started shooting lasers out of its eyes.

My set card, and my chance to stall for time, went up in flames.

"For your sake, we're going to end this duel quickly. I equip Galaxy Destroyer with Xyz Unit! Magic card, make my monster grow!" Sure enough, that robot began to grow, swelling up at least a third bigger. Another little glow-ball appeared in orbit around it, too. "Xyz unit gives my monster two hundred attack points for each rank it has, giving it a total of seven thousand!"

I'd be lying if I said I wasn't sweating. Every card this guy played was making my life worse, and I could already tell he wasn't done just yet.

"It would be so easy for my Galaxy Destroyer to put your precious Fitzgerald on ice, Miss Kimberly, but I did say I'd end this duel quickly. Now, I'll activate another spell card – Xyz Energy! By detaching another overlay unit, I can destroy one monster you control."

A column of light came down like the wrath of the almighty, consuming Fitzgerald. I think I screamed. I couldn't hear anything over the sound it made, an explosive rumble ten times worse than the crowd could ever be. My ears hurt from the sound and my eyes stung from the light, and I shrank back.

When the light and sounded faded and my head stopped hurting, I realized I could hear Shinichi laughing. He'd dropped any pretense of being a cool, casual guy. He was enjoying this, maybe even more than he would've enjoyed crushing someone with a title. Icarus, right? I was a mere mortal overstepping my station, and gods always love bringing down the hammer on impudent little shits. Right then and there, I was staring down a mighty big hammer.

"Now, Superdimensional Robot Galaxy Destroyer, attack her lifepoints directly! Superdimensional Starburst!" The panels on its chest, which were helpfully marked G and D, slid forward and then out. A long metal barrel slid out, covered in all kinds of blinking lights and pointless accents, and turned down towards me. I stepped back, nearly tripping over my own feet, but there was nothing I could do.