Disclaimer: I don't own twilight because I'm not Stephenie Meyer!
A/N: Story takes place after Breaking Dawn if you haven't read it, don't read this unless you want spoilers! Don't say I didn't warn you….
Edward pov.
"I just had the best idea ever!" Emmett squealed from the living room. Bella shrugged and walked over to go see what was happening. Normally I don't bother with Emmett's crazy schemes but since Bella was interested, so was I. "Are you sure you want me to do this?" Jasper was holding on to Emmett's arm. "Uh boys, what's going on?" Bella asked. I walked over to Bella and put my arm around her waist. "We are about to answer a burning question" Emmett yelled. He was standing on a table. What a maniac. "Oh and what is that" Alice said. By now Alice, Rosalie, Renesme, and Jacob had came into the room. "EMMETT CULLEN GET OFF THAT TABLE RIGHT NOW!" Esme must be here too. "I have always wanted to know what it feels like to get a limb ripped off" Emmet stated triumphantly "and Jasper has agreed to do it." Jasper could see Alice getting angry so I read her thoughts….
What is that idiot thinking? Ripping his arm off! That's gotta hurt like hell! I hope it doesn't reattach because of what that jerk did to us.
Oh, so she wasn't mad at Jasper but at Emmett. I would ask her about it later, but right now I shifted my attention to Jasper and Emmett.
"Ready one two THREE!" There was a loud ripping sound and then a sharp howl of pain. "Put it back on man!" Emmett was screaming at Jasper. Jasper was staring at Emmett's arm which now lay in his hands. Wow that came off quite easily he thought. I wondered why Jasper volunteered to do that in the first place. "Give me my arm back" Emmett screamed at Jasper. Jasper was running through the house with Emmett's arm above his head. Now that was a funny sight. Everyone was laughing and I think I heard Alice mutter "serves him right" then she said some unprintable words using his name quite often. Emmett had finally tackled Jasper and was trying to put his arm back on. Rosalie was kissing him all over. "Everything will be okay boo boo bear" she whispered to him as they walked to the kitchen together. What she sees in him, I'll never know.
"So Alice, what did Emmett do to Jasper this time?" I asked. I had walked over to her with Bella, she seemed curious as well. "WellfirstheputtacksinourbedsowhenwelaydowntheygetstuckinusandwespendhourspullingthemoutthenhechallengedJaspertoalightsaberfightandthenEmmettcheatedbyusinghisuglyfatfists!" (A/N: for people who can't read that it says well first he put tacks in our bed so when we lay down they get stuck in us and we spend hours pulling them out the he challenged Jasper to a light saber fight and then Emmett cheated by using his big fat fists!) My head started to spin. "Whoa Alice slow down" Bella and I said in unison. I didn't even want to imagine the reasons for using their bed. "Emmett is such an idiot" Bella said. "Oh I know" Alice replied, stifling a giggle. I'm sure I don't want to know. We made our way into the kitchen to see how Emmett was healing. "So we are here today with Mr. Emmett Cullen who just had his arm ripped off by his brother Jasper." Jacob was standing in front of Emmett pretending to be a newspaper reporter. Carlisle had come home once Esme had called him and explained what happened. Carlisle very interested in what was happening to Emmett, I think he thought of this as more research. He kept asking him tons of questions so fast that if they were human, they would have both died from lack of oxygen. Esme and Rosalie were walking around Carlisle to put band-aids all over Emmett's arm and Renesme was laughing hysterically at Jacob. She looked about five years old now. I wondered when she would stop growing. I hope she would outage Bella and I by much. Otherwise she would look more like a parent then we did. "GO AWAY MUTT!" Rosalie was screaming at Jacob like she usually does. "YOU ARE SO ANNOYING!" Jacob thought of a good comeback for a minute then said "hey do you know why blondes always smile during lightning storms?" Wow dog boy has a new joke well come on let's hear it! "They think that their picture's getting taken!" If Esme wasn't there Emmett would have ripped Jacobs head off then. I would have done it sooner if Bella and Renesme didn't love him so much. "Whoa why so angry Eddie?" Jasper shot a wave of calmness at me. I instantly felt better. "Not sure Jazz just too much Emmett right now" Bella took my hand and we ran back to our little house in the woods. We didn't have to worry about Renesme, she was safe with Jacob (who had shifted his attention to interviewing Jasper before we left). "I defiantly know one thing that will cheer you up" Bella was leading me towards the bedroom. Just then we heard a loud scream and it sounded like it was coming from Esme……
A/N: Cliff hanger muahaha! Review please, I love you! Sorry for the shorness. Give me some ideas please.