Torn Apart Chapter 1, a sailor moon fanfic

TORN APART

XXXXXXXXXXXX

Four bright shooting stars crossed the night sky. In fact they weren't realstars, but Earthlings could only see four lights slowly dying out in the distance.

Starlights with their Princess left the Solar System where they were kind of stars for a short time. Now their lightsupposed to come back again. They were heading towards their own home planet, similar to Earth in many respects. Kinmoku was awaiting them, with its ruined scenery and its inhabitants miraculously brought back by Sailor Moon's incredible powers.

The Blue Planet, the only planet in theentire galaxy which eluded its destruction from Galaxia's hands, was still shining downlike a sapphire on a flawless black velvet. Seiya couldn't stop watching it. No, no Seiya. Seiya was gone.

Star Fighter couldn't stop watching Earth.

So, this is it. We finished it. We found the Princess, we did what we came here for, everything ended happily. The whole Universe is saved, the devil turned into an angel with Sailor Moon's help and...

Damn it. I mustn't remember that girl, Seiya's voice cut the course of Fighter's thoughts, I promised to myself I will never ever think about her again. It's useless, it's in vain, it's needless, it's...

Painful.

It wouldn't be painful if you stopped dreaming of her, Fighter's voice reasoned, just think of what is in front of you, not behind you.

The Earth was smaller and smaller with every second because they were traveling really fast. Soon it will be impossible to differ it from many other pale lights, and then...

It will disappear. And I'll never see her again!!!

If that scream hadescaped Fighter's throat, it would have echoed through the galaxy. Yet it had been enclosed immediately within her inner garden where nobody was allowed to enter. Nobody except the one person... but unfortunately that person didn't want to enter it.

Fighter's companions were observing her from under their brows suspiciously but she was looking normal. The storm inside her was hidden perfectly, buried under the ordinary Fighter's face.

You can't even imagine how much I missed you, Princess Kakyuu caressed ebony hair of her guardian with her eyes, Fighter, you had to experience so much pain and grief because of me. It will be rewarded, I promise. I'll make that sad, lonely look vanish from your beautiful sapphire eyes. I'll make you forget about Earth and everything you had been through there.

XXXXXXXXXXXX

Usagi was stroking the ring on her finger gently, giggling to herself with content. The pink heart-shaped stone glistened in the sunlight when she moved her hand. The ring befit perfectly and she almost rubbed her hands, letting herself to flow away, towards her bright, dreamlike future. In the meantime teacher was calling the roll.

"Katsuki Wakaba... Kino Makoto... Kiriyama Sasuke... Kiryuu Akira... Kou Seiya."

The sweet dream Usagi was sunk in faded away at once. He is not here. Did he reach Kinmoku already? Did he meet his friends? It's strange to know we'll never see each other again. No one knows the truth about him except me and the girls...

It was just the dream, Usagi. The last six weeks were just the worst nightmare you have ever had, nothing more. You lose everything and won everything. You proved that everything you believe is right.

It's better to forget you met the boys who were turning into girls, you fought the most terrible and the strongest warrior ever, you broke someone's heart...

Usagi quivered and winced. It was the part she didn't like the most. Not fighting Galaxia, not losing her beloved ones, but breaking his heart. It seemed it was shelled, hard, cold heart. But after a time it displayed its softness, tenderness and mildness, startled her, amazed her, even attracted her so much she became really afraid of losing control. In the middle of thestorm he was the only one she could find her comfort with, her only haven.

It was unfair. I only added to his hardships because of my own weakness. I couldn't survive by myself and I... took advantage of him?

Usagi's eyes wandered back to her ring. The sense of guilt brushed her soul and she blushed a bit. To push away that feeling she looked around and gazed at Ami. The blue-haired crammer was sad. It wasn't her usual melancholy yet something deeper. Her eyesalways so serene and soft, were darkened at the moment. She was staring at her textbooks and notebooks lying on the desk in front of her. From her seat Usagi couldn't see the notebook on the top, signed by its owner. Ami touched the name hesitantly with trembling finger. Kou Taiki.

XXXXXXXXXXXX

"It's so wonderful to have you back!"

"Princess, welcome again."

"Kinmoku was waiting for you."

"Sailor Moon, really?"

"We're so glad the war is finally over."

The words, the thousands of words rustling around and swelling to the unbearable rate. I was so excited and happy to see all those faces again, to hear familiar voices, to feel like home. So why the excitement dried off and I'm empty like the river after the drought?

Fighter closed the door of her old room. In fact it didn't separate her from others because the walls still had the large holes, the trace of the past disaster. The rebuilding of the palace was the first item on their list of important things to do but all the workers had to live there since their own houses were still in ruin. There were some simple wooden barracks erected next to the palace but when it was raining everybody had to move to the stone building. The voices were resounding in the halls, driving Fighter crazy. After the whole day of hard work she urged for the rest and privacy so badly. It has to be admitted she liked to work because it helped her to forget but when the evening came and she still saw the questioning, uncertain looks in Healer's and Maker's eyes, she yearned only for one thing: solitude. The absolute solitude.

The worst thing is not the pain. The worst thing is when the pain can't be expressed in any way, Fighter thought. She made for her bathroom. Well, it was the bathroom earlier. Now it was the awful place with shattered glaze, dirty and neglected. Anyway she turned on the tap and took some water in the big bowl. The cockroach ran out from under the piece of stone and the sharp heel of Fighter's shoe crushed it with a crunch. Damn worms. Damn filth. In the corner of her room where were no holes she fastened two sheets to form a small cubicle. Damn cold water. I became spoiled somewhat. She put the bowl on the high stool and started to undress herself.

Fucking bra!

She peeked at herself, touched her own body. The tears built in her eyes and she uttered half growl, half weep.

I won't stand it. I want her so badly, I have to go back to her or I'll go insane! I have to see her once again and tell her how much I love her, how much I crave for being by her side for the rest of my life. I want to be close to her, I want to...

Stop whining, the other voice spoke, you're pitiful. Look at yourself. You're not meant to be the man. Not by her side, nor by anyone's side. You're Sailor Star Fighter.

I remember when I embraced her, her heart beating next to mine, her body, her fragrance, her...

Fighter detransformed with a choked cry. The Senshi fuku disappeared, replaced by the red suit and the black shirt. And underneath...

XXXXXXXXXXXX

"Do you understand now, Usagi-chan?" Ami was as patient and helpful as always. Usagi curled her lips and shook her head, all her features saying "I'm sorry, but I completely don't..." Ami sighed and leant forward.

"So we start from the beginning. See..."

If only Taiki were here, he would understand. He would explain everything to Usagi and she would get it. And I could watch him.

Star Maker. She didn't even think once about you. The only thing she had on her mind was searching for her Princess and fighting Galaxia's servants. When she got what she wanted she retired with no regrets.

But the man I fell in love with was Kou Taiki. Those mysterious violet eyes, auburn hair. The aloofness and calmness. I could never ever imagine he was the warrior coming from the other System, in fact the girl...

"Could we have a short break?" Usagi pleaded, "My head is getting heavier and heavier. I have to take some fresh air."

"I'm tired as well, I'll make some tea," Minako stood up and went to the kitchen. Rei stretched herself and stroked Luna sleeping soundly on her lap. Luna purred loudly and the girls burst out with laughter.

She is waiting for us to ask her. She burns to tell us everything. Why does she remain silent? Rei mused, as far as I know her she was never able to keep secrets. At least until Mamoru went away and she didn't get any message from him for six weeks. What happened to her? Did she grow up at last?

"Usagi, when are you going to marry?" Rei uttered with a wicked sparkle in her eye and her friend flushed with content.

"In a year..." came the shy answerand Rei's stomach turned the somersault.

"What?" she stammered, "But you won't be of age, will you?"

In a year? I never thought it would be so quickly. I hope I won't be asked to be the bridesmaid, it would break me.

"My parents agreed and Mamoru is already of age so it won't be the problem," Usagi grinned happily, I am astonished as well but they like Mamo-chan so much! Everything goes so well that it's hard to believe. And Rei-chan is surprised, ha ha!

"You're afraid of someone stealing him from you, huh?" Rei sneered, "That is the reason for your hurry..."

"You know no one can't steal him! Our destiny is to be together forever," Usagi stuck her tongue out, "And you are just jealous!"

Jealous? No, Usagi, that is not jealousy. That feeling is more burning, more agonizing and dreadful than mere jealousy. It's just the pain of carrying too heavy burden for too many years. But what can you know about that?

Minako entered the room and put the tray on the table. She approached her desk and took something from it.

"Hey, look what I found a few days ago!" she wrinkled her nose funnily, "It was kind of stupid of me, but anyway..."

She put photos on the table and the girls threw their arms to get it. Those were photos Usagi took when Minako tried to approach Three Lights to be considered their girlfriend.

"I totally forgot I have them. Isn't that good I didn't throw them away?" Minako babbled while gaping at Yaten's grimace, "Let's make the proper mood..."

She turned the stereo on and "Shooting Star" drifted from speakers. The silence fell and they listened to the song. Usagi took one of the photos. There were only Seiya's searching eyes on it, piercing through her. I was so stupid to help Minako, Usagi laughed to herself nervously, I forgot myself and revealed myself. Seiya surely thought we were crazy, Minako drawing him out and me taking photos of them from behind the tree. She put the photo aside, because she felt uncomfortable for some reason, gazing into those unblinking, big eyes of his.

She made a strange face, Rei thought, did she feel something for Seiya? Unbelievable. Her only prince is Mamoru and in a year she will become his wife. And I... I'll finally die. The end of my agony. Should I be glad?

"So, Usagi, didn't I mishear? You're going to marry in a year?" Minako elbowed her friend, "Nothing less from heiress of Silver Millennium!"