Okay folks. This story is seriously starting to piss me off. Why? Because It is taking a whole two months to make. I swore I would not update a single one of my stories until I got this one complete, because I wanted to get this out of the way. But because it's taking so long, I've decided to post a preview of the beginning of the story just to keep you guys posted. So far, I've reached the beginning of the third half of this incredibly long story. So enjoy this preview and let's hope the rest of it will be worth the wait.
This preview will be deleted once the full story is up.
(All the way up in space, an entire fleet of ships roamed the universe passing by unsuspecting planets. Leading this large fleet was a gigantic alien mother ship, The Massive. Piloting the ships are a race of alien invaders known as the Irkens. Leading them all from the Massive are the aliens leaders, the Almighty Tallest, Red and Purple who are standing on a giant stage to a large crowd of other Irken soldiers.)
Red: Welcome planetary conversion team to the outer orbit of planet Taupe, recently conquered by Invader Zee!
(The crowd gathered as Irken Invader Zee stepped onto the stage smiling and waving.)
Purple: Okay shut up!
(The crowd stopped cheering.)
Red: Yes, Invader Zee has done a spectacular job! However, there is another reason we have called you all here. Our top Irken scientists have been working for days to create a brand new addition to the Irken empire!
Purple: WOO! Give 'em a hand folks!
(The Irkens cheered once more.)
Purple: Alright, enough already!
(They stopped.)
Red: This new creation of ours will be the future of the Irken Armada. More powerful. More dangerous. And of course, HE'S TALL!
(The Irken crowd cheered some more, but it slowly died down when they realized something.)
Irken: Uh, wait! If this new guy is the future of the Irken Armada, does that mean we're going to be replaced?
Purple: YOU DARE QUESTION US? SPACE HIM!
Irken: Wait! Wait! No! AAUUUUGGGHHHH!
(The crowd watch with awe as the Irken was shot into space.)
Purple: Actually, that is a good question.
Red: Don't worry friends. We only have plans to make one Irken super soldier. But it's not going to be any of you who will be replaced. The super soldier is specially designed to replace only the defective Irkens.
Irken: There is a defective in the Irken Armada?
Purple: That's right! And I think you all know who that is!
(At the Skool, the creepy teacher, Mrs. Bitters is at the front of the classroom talking to the students.)
Mrs. Bitters: And that students is how the world is going to end. Do not even bother living today like it might be your last. Because chances are, you won't get that chance. We are all doomed. Doomed. Dooooooooooomed.
(While the whole class is intimidated by the teacher, Dib was more fixated on another matter. At the desk way on the other side, a certain green-skinned kid is drawing a bunch of pictures on his desk.)
Dib: What is he up to?
(The teacher stood up and walked toward the door.)
Mrs. Bitters: While you miserable specks waste away in the agonizing torture chamber that is your meaningless lives, I'll be right back to get some more chalk.
(As soon as Mrs. Bitters left the classroom, Dib leaped from his desk and onto Zim's looking him straight in the eye.)
Dib: WHAT ARE YOU UP TO THIS TIME ZIM?
Zim: None of your business monkey-headed monkey boy!
Dib: I don't even get that one.
Zim: It doesn't have to! I can get away with it because I'M ZIM!
Dib: Well, okay. I guess if you're not planning anything, I guess I'll just. . .
(Dib lunges forth and grabs the paper from Zim's desk.)
Zim: HEY! GET YOUR DIRT HANDS OFF MY WRITING SURFACE!
(The other kids watched with interest as Zim and Dib were playing tug-o-war with the paper.)
Chunk: Heh heh. Loser fight!
Sarah: I wonder who's going to win this one?
Zita: Who cares? The both stink.
Melvin: I BET IT'S GONNA BE THE KID WITH THE GIANT HEAD!
Dib: MY HEAD'S NOT BIG!
(Finally, Dib yanked the paper out of Zim's hands.)
Dib: HA! Game over Zim! Once I find out what your latest evil plan is, I will find a way to stop you!
(As he looked at the designs with excitement, his face slowly turned to dumbstruck disappointment as there was nothing but a pig drawn on it.)
Dib: That's it? That's you new plan?
Zim: ALRIGHT, FINE! Does it not fill you with feelings of dread and fear?
Dib: No. No it does not.
(Dib suddenly started chuckling.)
Dib: Wow Zim. You must be running out of ideas.
Zim: Go on and laugh Dib! Once this project is completed, you won't be laughing ever. . .again. . .never. . . .forever. . .the laughing. . .EVER AGAIN!
(After a long stare down, Dib and Zim turned to the other kids who were watching the whole conversation.)
Zim: Um. . . .I LOVE. . .PEACHES!
(After Skool had ended, Zim ran up to his house with the designs in hand. As he reached the front door, the Roboparents greeted him.)
Roboparents: Welcome home son!
Zim: Yeah, yeah! Whatever!
(After pushing the Roboparents aside, Zim made it to the toilet and flushed himself down. The toilet actually led Zim through a long tunnel leading down into a secret lab.)
Zim: Grrr! That Dib thinks he is so clever with his stinking human wit and head! Well I'll show him! COMPUTER!
Computer: What?
Zim: Reopen Project: Pigageddon!
Computer: Roger! Reopening the project that needs a better name!
(The labs doors suddenly started moving around until a secret chamber reveals itself. The only objects inside are a bunch of computer with buttons and a large containment pod holding rubber piggy in suspended animation.)
Zim: Yes. Yes! I cannot wait to show this to the Tallest!
(As Zim walked toward his project, his robot sidekick suddenly appeared from the ceiling and landed on Zim's head.)
GIR: WHEE! I just flew!
Zim: GIR! What did I tell you about interrupting me during my moments of triumph!
GIR: I dunno?
Zim(groan) I don't have time for you crazy antics GIR. This is the greatest moment of my life and I don't want you to distract me!
GIR: Whatcha doin'?
Zim: Alright. I'll explain it again, but just this once so you'll understand! So pay attention!
(GIR sat down on the floor with interest as Zim explained his plan.)
Zim: Ever since I wound up on this planet, I have been fascinated with these. . .PIGS as people call them. And ever since that little rubber piggy time/space venture, I've been meaning to search for a way to utilize these death pigs in a much more devastating manner. This particular rubber pig I have contained has been altered by only the finest Irken technology as well as some extra defensive counter measures from Planet Vort. Once this pig awakens, it will grow to incredible size and transform engulf the entire Earth in it's rubber piggy mouth! Of course, I will have left the planet before he swallows it. And once the Earth is swallowed whole, the pig will self-destruct leaving an explosion so powerful, not a single traced of the planet of any organic life will live to see the light of day, AND ZIM WILL PROVE HIS MIGHT AS THE MOST POWERFUL IRKEN THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN! Did you get all that GIR?
(But GIR was not here. In the corner of the lab, GIR was flying right on top of Minimoose laughing.)
Zim: Bah! Whatever. Time to get to work and finish this pig so it can destroy the planet!
(While Zim is working, Zim realized there might be someone else who would be interested in his plan.)
Zim: Wait. Why should I wait to reveal my best plan ever when I can give the Tallest a sneak preview! COMPUTER! ESTABLISH A VIDEO LINK TO THE MASSIVE!
(On the giant TV screen, the Tallest were sitting on the couch eating a plate full of nachos.)
Purple: You wanna know what I hate more than wax paper? Unpaid mortgage loans.
Red: Oh yeah. I hear ya man.
Zim: MY TALLEST!
(The Tallest jumped with surprise as they fell off the couch.)
Purple: ZIM? BUT I THOUGHT WE CUT YOUR VIDEO LINK TO THE MASSIVE!
Zim: Oh, I got a new one curtesy of Vort. I know it was an accident.
Red: ZIM! What could you POSSIBLY WANT this time?
Zim: My Tallest! I have a surprise for you! I am about to be the first Irken Invader to conquer a planet and initiate an organic sweep single-handedly!
Purple: Phhbt! Yeah right! No Irken invader has ever done an organic sweep all by himself!
Zim: Oh, but my Tallest! I am confident that this will be different! Look!
(Zim points toward the rubber pig in the containment chamber.)
Red: You're gonna commence an organic sweep. . .with that?
Zim: Yes! Are you not intrigued?
Purple: Uh, can we call you back?
Zim: Sure my Tallest! Just be here for when I finish my project. I wouldn't want you to miss this amazing spectacle! It will go down in IRKEN HISTORY!
(As soon as the transmission turned off, Red and Purple fell out of the couch laughing.)
Red: OH, MAN! WHAT RIOT!
Purple: Yeah! And organic sweep? Single-handed? BWAHAHAHAHAHA!
(While the two Tallest were laughing, an Irken solider walked in.)
Irken: My Tallest! Our project is almost complete!
Red: Is it now? Why don't we see for ourselves?
(Red and Purple walked down the hall to the lab of the Massive where dozens of Irken scientists were hard at work on other inventions. But right in the middle of the lab, inside a stasis tube was the body of an Irken taller that most of the Irkens in the room except Red and Purple.)
Irken: Project completion at 98%!
Red: Yes. It's almost complete! Once he wakes up, Zim will be old news! And well have a new more competent invader in our ranks!
Purple: You wanna laugh some more?
Red: Of course my friend.
(Red and Purple began laughing as their newest soldier was nearing its completion.)
Meanwhile on the planet Foodcourtia. . .
(It was the time of the Great Foodening. The biggest food rush in all the galaxy. With a gravitational pull so powerful, there was no escape. The man working behind the counter at Shloogorgh's knows that. And he wasn't happy at all.)
Sizz-Lorr: Alright, that's enough! Take your orders and get out!
(The large crowd of hungry customers grabbed their orders from the table and left.)
Sizz-Lorr: Curse you Zim! Every day you are not on Foodcourtia only makes me more and more irritated! I swear to this Zim, if I ever catch you, I WILL SEE TO IT THAT YOU NEVER ESCAPE AGAIN!
?: You keep talking to yourself like that, and everyone will think you're crazy.
(The fry lord turned angrily toward a nearby table where a shady alien was seated. Sizz-Lorr lumbered over to the table and looked at the customer.)
Sizz-Lorr: Who are you to talk to me that way?
(The customer revealed her face to Sizz-Lorr surprising him realizing that she is an Irken. Her purple eyes stared right ar Sizz-Lorr.)
Sizz-Lorr: Oh, my apologies. I didn't know you were a high-ranking invader.
Tak: I'm not. But I should've been! I heard what you've been ranting about Sizz-Lorr. And from the sound of it, it seems we have a common enemy.
Sizz-Lorr: Who, Zim? What has he ever done to you?
Tak: He ruined my chance at being an invader! I was ready to become one of the Irken elite soldiers, but that IDIOT caused a blackout on Devastis trapping me in my own training cell! And what's worse, when I finally went to face Zim, he actually defeated me in a fight! I promised myself I would make him pay.
Sizz-Lorr: Heh. You should've seen him when he was forced into labor at my restaurant. It was fun to see him in pain while it lasted. Until the day he escaped from me! TWICE!
Tak: Zim has humiliated us both! And neither one of us was able to defeat him. I say we join forces and work together to destroy Zim once and for all!
Sizz-Lorr: Hmm. I like the idea of destroying Zim. Alright. I'll go for it. But how are we going to get off Foodcourtia? The gravitational pull makes it impossible for any ship to leave the planet.
Tak: How else do you think I got here?
(Tak points to her wrist displaying a watch with a teleportation feature. Sizz-Lorr grinned at this news.)
Sizz-Lorr: At last. After forty-eight long miserable years, I can finally get off this planet!
Tak: Bt, you've only been in charge of this place for twelve years.
Sizz-Lorr: Huh? Oh uh, I think there's some kinda time ripple thing involved or something.
Tak: So, are you ready to plot revenge on Zim?
Sizz-Lorr: Just a sec. I gotta make sure my shift is covered first. GASHLOOG!
Gashloog: WHAT?
Sizz-Lorr: YOU'RE IN CHARGE OF SHLOOGORGH'S NOW!
Gashloog: WOO! YEAH!
Sizz-Lorr: Yeah. Woo-hoo to you too. NOW TAKE THESE TEN THOUSAND CUSTOMERS ORDERS!
Gashloog: YES MY FRYLO-wait, what?
(Gashloog was suddenly overwhelmed by a massive tidal wave of hungry customers as he screamed to get away.)
Sizz-Lorr: He'll be fine. Anyway, let's get off this planet!
(Tak pressed the button on her watch teleporting herself and Sizz-Lorr out of the restaurant. However, this teleportation had not gone unnoticed. Sitting at another table was a small group of very different looking aliens. One in particular looked slightly similar to an Irken except it had gray skin and a pair of large goat horns on his head. Another was just a floating cone with a face on it.)
Lard Nar: Finally. I thought those Irken scum would never leave! Now we can discuss our big plan without any of them eavesdropping on us!
Shloonktapooxis: Woo-hoo! YEAH! Um, what are we discussing again?
Lard Nar: Gah! Alright. As you all know, the planet Taupe had just been recently conquered by the Irken fleet. It won't be long before they go ahead with the organic sweep wiping out all life on there. We cannot let the Irkens destroy countless live just for their personal game! Never again! Starting tomorrow, an entire fleet of our ships will take the Massive by surprise and stop them before they ever get the chance to commence the sweep! Then those Irken scum will know never to underestimate the inexhaustible power of. . .THE RESISTY!
Spleenk: Um. . .are the Taupe-guys good?
Lard Nar: Well, they did help us Vortians during the great takeover of long ago. And they make really good kettle corn.
Spleenk: KETTLE CORN? NOOOOOO!
Lard Nar: I'm sure you all know what's at stake here. We can't leave anything to chance! Tomorrow, the Irken military fleet will FAAAAAAAA-exhale deeply-AAAAALLLLL!
(The Resisty members all cheered loudly. Tonight, they feast on Foodcourtia. Tomorrow, their surprise attack on the Massive begins.)
(Back on Earth, Zim is about to put the finishing touches on his pig project. While Zim was pushing buttons all around, GIR was covered from head to two in gravy while flying on Minimoose.)
GIR: YEE-HAAA! All aboard the gravy boat!
Zim: The time has come GIR! At last after days of research and hours of agonizing pig burns, it is time to bring life to my latest and greatest weapon EVER! Behold .um. . . .uh. . .PIG, no no, I mean, uh, PIGA-Tenta-Beast, NO! Um. . .Octo. . .pus? Doom. . .Piggy. . .octopiggy. . .pus. . . .Piggy. . .pus. Piggypus, yes! YES! BEHOLD, PIGGYPUS!
(Zim pressed down on a large button opening the stasis tube. And floating out from the tube was the culmination of all of Zim's plans. The floating rubber pig hovered in the air with at least six skinny tentacles beneath it.)
GIR: Floating pig!
Zim: This is no ordinary pig GIR! This pig is outfitted with all of the best technology the galaxy has to offer. Once I send it to destroy the Earth, we only have a few seconds to evacuate the planet before Piggypus devours it and explodes.
GIR: How it splode?
Zim: Good question. You see, inside Piggypus is a powerful self-destruct core which will only explode once the Piggypus ingests something bigger than itself. I.e., the Earth. So long as this pig doesn't eat anything bigger than him there's no way this plan can. .
GIR: MY MELON!
(GIR's watermelon suddenly rolls into the lab and falls right into Piggypus' mouth. Once swallowed whole, Piggypus suddenly began to shake violently.)
Zim: OH NO! NO! NOT NOW! NO EXPLODING NOW!
(But it was too late. The explosion went off covering half the lab. Zim and GIR were blasted far back to the walls while Piggypus lied helpless on the ground.)
Zim: NO! MY PLAN! MY SWEET, BEAUTIFUL, FLAWLESS PLAN! NOOOOOOOOOOO-aw well. Back to the old drawing board. Computer! Blast this disappointing experiment into Outer Space!
Computer: Aye aye captain.
(A long tube extends from the ceiling sucking in the burned out rubber pig like a vacuum hose. And from the chimney of Zim's house, the rubber pig was shot clear into space. Zim watched it get ejected as he sat down with disappointment.)
Zim: Well good riddance! I thought I could impress the Tallest with my new invention, but I guess that would've been a mistake. The last thing I want is for the Tallest to think I'm some kind of a screw up.
Computer: Master. With all due respect, did it ever occur to you that maybe the Tallest don't care about all the things you've been planning?
Zim: WHAT? Belay that filth talk you speak off!
Computer: I'm just saying, every time you call the Tallest about another one of your big plans, they seem to be rather uninterested or silently laughing to themselves.
Zim: I don't know what that means, but I'm pretty sure it's something that computers get DISMANTLED FOR SAYING! The Tallest take an interest to every invader! I know them, and they would never do anything to mock me in such a way!
Red:"I'm Zim! And I'm gonna destroy the Earth someday! Duh, I hope that big headed kid doesn't thwart me like he does every day! Doooo, I'm sure a stupid. . .stupid head!"
(The Tallest started laughing their heads off while in the lab of the Massive awaiting for their perfect warrior to be complete.)
Purple: Aw, yeah. Zim is pretty dumb. Anywho, how's that super soldier coming along?
Irken: Almost finished. Progress reaching 100% right abooooooooooooouuuuuut .NOW!
Red: Great work Irken scientist who we never bothered to learn the name of! Now what should we call him?
Purple: Well we did create him to replace Zim, so how about. . .uh. . . .Invader MIZ!
(Red stared at Purple for a while.)
Red: That's .BRILLIANT! Unknown scientist, awaken Invader Miz!
(The Irken pressed a button on the table opening the stasis tube. Smoke covered the entire lab as Red and Purple tried to clear it away. As the smoke cleared, stepping out in front of the Tallest was the pinnacle of everything they had worked on. The super soldier in question was really tall (not taller than the Tallest) and looks almost identical to Zim. Except he was wearing advanced Irken military armor. and there was a long red sash around his neck which reached all the way down to the floor. His other notable features are the three long and deformed red claws on each hand.)
Miz: Ready to serve the Irken Empire!
Purple: Squeee! He's so perfect!
Red: Welcome to life Invader Miz. As the newest soldier in the Irken army, you are to follow protocol and give it your all during all planetary invasions.
Miz: Planetary invasions?
Purple: Yeah, didn't you know? We Irken's are on a mission to take over the entire galaxy. A little mission we call Operation: Impending Doom II! We've sent hundreds of Irkens to different planets all over the place so they can conquer them. And we would like you to be part of our agenda Miz.
Miz: What? That's stupid! I could conquer all of these planets in a quarter of the time than any of these "invaders" could!
Red: We know. We wouldn't have created you if we didn't know that.
Miz: Very well my Tallest. What can I do to prove my worth?
Purple: Well. . .you are Zim's replacement. So. . . .send him to Earth!
Miz: Earth?
Red: Earth? I mean, yeah! Right! You see, the guy who you are replacing is currently sent to the planet to "destroy it". If you can conquer it before Zim, then we'll be impressed.
Miz: I can do better than that my Tallest. Why should I stop at Earth when I can conquer the entire galaxy?
Red: All invaders are sent to the planet they are supposed to conquer. It's the rule Miz!
(Miz grumbles under his breath feeling his opportunity to impress the Tallest is being wasted.)
Miz: As you wish. I shall go conquer Earth right away.
(Miz prepares to step out the door, but stopped before hand.)
Miz: A question my Tallest. Does this Zim have any mortal enemies?
Red: Uh, nope. None that I can think of.
Purple: Well. . . .there is that crazy Tak who has this grudge against him. And I guess Sizz-Lorr has some sort of vendetta too.
Miz: That's all I need to know. Farewell my Tallest!
(Finally, Miz exits the lab.)
Red: Y'know, something about what Miz said sounded pretty suspicious.
Purple: Yeah. I know .AW, WELL! You want some churros?
Red: You know it!
(Right then, the rubber piggy that Zim launched into space passed right by the Massive.)
Irken: My Tallest! I just got a reading of an unknown object that passed right by our ship!
Red: Well, what is it?
Irken: It looks like. . .an. . .Earth pig? But here's the thing. That object is flying straight into a belt of concentrated dark matter.
Purple: Of what?
Irken: It's a kind of radiation that causes anything that comes into contact with grow mad with power. We actually injected Miz with that stuff so he would stabilize properly and carry out the tasks you wished to be seen done.
Red: So Miz has dark matter within him. You don't think he could try anything against us, do you?
Purple: Hmm .NAH!
(But as the pig flew through space, it flew right into a dark sector where tiny particles of dark purple glitter attacked to it. The rubber pig finally came to a stop and stood still for a few minutes. Just then, its eyes began to glow red and tentacles began to grow from underneath it. But the worst part was, it was beginning to grow.