The screams echoed through the room. There were nurses going in and out, bringing the midwife the equipment she needed. Eli was letting Clare squeeze his hand as hard as she could. He couldn't complain about the pain, though, because he knew she was going through so much worse.
She'd been laying on the hospital bed for 2 hours. For 2 hours, she'd been screaming and crying and pushing. Eli was just hold her hand, well, rather letting her hold his hand and counting from 1 to 20 a million times. He was trying to keep calm, but how could he when his wife was in such pain?
And, finally, the doctor said, "The head is-get me some towels!" Eli watched as the withdrew from Clare a child. There seemed to be some kind of panic, and the baby was rushed out of the room with doctors and nurses following behind.
"Can-Can I hold it, Eli?" Eli slowly turned to look at Clare, who appeared so weak and drained, "Where did they take it? Is it a boy, Eli? Why did they take it away?" His lip twitched. Why did they take it away? He opened his mouth to answer her, but closed it, unsure of his own words. Then he said, "I'm sure it's regulation. The have to take his or her pulse and stuff. It's okay."
He leaned down and kissed her forehead, "It's okay." They lay there, unknowing of anything. A nurse came in and asked if Clare was feeling alright. "She's fine," Eli answered, "Is everything okay with the baby?"
The nurse didn't answer him for a moment, and continued to search through some drawers, then said, "We don't know yet. There were some difficulties, but-"
"Difficulties? What do you mean?" Clare cried. Eli place a hand over hers, "It's okay, Clare. Will the baby be okay?" Eli asked more calmly. "We're doing everything we can." The nurse assured, grabbing what she was looking for from the drawers and hurrying out.
"What-What difficulties, Eli? What happened? Did you see the baby? Was it okay? Was there blood?" He stopped her, "I don't know. It'll be fine. I can go and ask doctor," He began to stand up, but Clare begin crying, "Don't leave, Eli."
He sat back down, his heart thudding in his chest. "I"m scared." Clare whispered. "It'll be okay."
They drove home in complete silence. Clare stared out the window, emotionless. The baby seat in the back was empty. Eli's teeth were clenched, and tears were streaming down his face. He tried not to make any noise; he didn't want to seem weak in front of Clare.
His knuckles were paper white from gripping the steering wheel so tight. It's not fair, He thought. None of this is fair. The baby was alive, why couldn't they save it?!
He didn't voice his opinion because he knew it would only make Clare cry. As they pulled in, Eli could see Helen, Glen and Jake sitting on the porch of their house. "Just go inside. I'll talk to them." Eli said. She walked slowly, as everything hurt. She didn't look at either one of them, just went inside.
"Listen, now is not a good time." Eli said, sitting down on the railing. They had both been at the hospital, but were in the waiting room when the news struck.
"I think you and Clare, Clare especially, need support-"
"What Clare needs right now is to be left alone. We both do. This is hard, but she doesn't want to be crowded by a bunch of people. I'm grateful for you guys, but I need you to leave."
"Come on, Dad." Jake said. He stopped and hugged Eli, who needed that hug so much. They stood there for a moment, the Glen hugged Eli and then Helen. "I'll call you guys, okay? Just...now isn't a good time."
Eli opened the front door and wandered the house until he found Clare in the nursery they'd spent months building and decorating.
She sat on the rocking chair in the corner, holding a photo album in her hands. "We'll take a picture every week." Eli had promised, "And we'll fill this photo album up and start a new one."
There were already 10-25 ultrasound photos in there and Clare was flipping through each one. "Are you okay?" Eli asked gingerly. "What do you think?" She snapped. He sat down on a toy chest, "This is hard for me too, okay? Don't get all pissy at me. I didn't do anything."
"You told me everything would work out! You said it would ll be okay!" She cried. Eli shook his head, "And at the time, I thought that was the truth!" She began crying, so Eli lowered his voice, "It was a premature birth. There was nothing that could be done." He hated saying those words and, even though he knew they were true, he wanted to be, and was, mad at the doctors for letting their child die.
"Leave me alone, Eli." Clare muttered, "I just...I need to be alone." Eli pursed his lips, but left. It was painful, though, because Clare needed to be alone, but Eli needed to be around someone.