Tempus Fugit

Ahem: time to Haiku

First fic, be kind, Is first part only, More later, When inspiration fairy strikes, All belongs to jms, Not mine, Thanking ooo, Crazy_ranger

"I love you," He murmured in simplicity.

Marcus felt the life being pulled from under his skin, out of veins his and his body, and into her. It hurt. It hurt like hell. It kept building and building of pain into agony. If he could of moved he would have shut the machine down. If he could of found breath he would of screamed for mercy. Nothing. Just pain and the world turning black.

The darkness engulfed him. Reminded him he was alone. He couldn't feel his hand resting on Susan's anymore. She probably didn't even know he was there. He barely knew himself.

The pain grew again. He was going to die. That much was certain. He couldn't be in this much pain and live. Any small hope of being saved was now gone. Marcus didn't believe in miracles. Miracles couldn't happen- could they? Every action had a consequence- especially today.

His mind raced. Turning over probabilities and possibilities with his life rapidly running short. Edging towards his demise relentlessly. Oh God, he was too young to die. He always thought he'd make it to forty at least. Maybe keel over and have a coronary from the stress of trying to figure out how to keep the company afloat. He never wanted to be a hero. He didn't believe in cowardice or heroism. Just self-preservation. Besides, heroes always had bad endings. He fully realized he was heading to one when he found himself completely paralyzed.

He couldn't breathe. His lungs were frozen in agony. Marcus panicked. He didn't want to die. Not alone. Not like this. But he was out of time- and out of air. Susan was gonna hate him when she woke up. Selfish bastard leaving her alone with life energy that wasn't rightly hers. Did she even know why he'd done it? Why didn't he think of this before?

*********************************************************** "Damn."

Again. Susan hated starting the day like this.

That dream again. The one where she heard Marcus, just before he died. Susan hated that dream. Every time it was so intense. So real, as were the tears on her face when she woke. This was the fourth time in as many nights she had that damned dream. She'd be thrown by it for the entire day.

She rolled over and almost out of bed.

Damn narrow Minbari beds! She was the head of the rangers- shouldn't that at least entail a decent sized bed? At least it wasn't slanting at the traditional 45-degree angle. She made it abundantly clear when she took the position, that her bed was to remain horizontal, or she would not remain in her position.

Well it was better than being a desk jockey back in Geneva. That was a recurring nightmare; paperwork, photo opportunities, speech making, dinners with more brass than brains. Urgh. At least here the conversation went beyond "During the Minbari war." The look on the joint chiefs faces when she quit earth force, it was something that still made her smile sadistically now. They'd put so much effort into making her a hero, for her to turn around and join their biggest recruitment rivals was eternally satisfying to her. She never thought she'd have taken so much glee in quitting.

But to be honest she was just as lonely here as she'd been at home. Yes there was always someone to talk to, but no one who she could spa with in an affectionate way. Well perhaps David when he visited, he had inherited his fathers' sense of humour-, which to the Minbari made him odd. But he was around so little of the time, and the days seemed to fall one into another.

It was still dark outside; the imminent dawn was in preparation. Delenn would be up, but Susan never disturbed her during the sunrise. Since John's death it had become ritual. Perhaps it was Delenns' way of reminding herself that there are always new beginnings.

Climbing out of bed, Susan made her way over to the window and looked out. Soon the first rays of sunlight would illuminate the city over the ridge. The light would reflect and bounce between the crystal spires thousands of times over.

She cast her mind back to the saying about Tusanor: "That to dream in the city of sorrows is to dream of a better future". Who said that? Did Jeff tell her that one? No. It was after that. She was being encouraged to visit Minbar in the conversation, she'd told him he'd missed his calling and should have been a travel agent. The reply had been. "Well bugger you then!"

Marcus. Only he'd dare speak to her like that. If only he could be here now- standing there swearing. She remembered the look in his eyes when he told her about Tusanor. It was the same deliciously childlike look of wonder he got when talking about his Arthurian legends. He had thrived on that kind of thing. Poetic crap about building the future. God, she was getting cynical.

"That to dream in the city of sorrows is to dream of a better future." If that's true, She thought critically, why do I keep dreaming about the past?

***********************************************************

Relann checked her timepiece, re arranged the desk for the fourth time that morning, then paced over to the door and back again. The Entil'Zha was late again. She was often not punctual, which of course Relann would not dream of complaining about. However it did make great inconvenience for those wishing to see the en'til'zha, whom Relann was often the butt of their complaints. Today was no exception, and Relanns infinite patience was not as infinite as it previously had been. Checking her timepiece again, she went to face the crowd.

Outside of the office sat three senior rangers, half a dozen recruits and a delegation from the drazi to discuss establishing another training camp in their territory. The rangers stood as they saw Ivanovas' young aide moving swiftly towards them. She was, pretty, not overly tall but helpful as often as possible.

Approaching cautiously, Relann knew she must be tactful. She quickly bowed to each group in turn.

"Excuse me, but the Entil'zha is. otherwise engaged in important meetings with the alliance. Not that any of the meetings she has scheduled with you are any less important. If you please wait a short while longer I'm sure that I will be able to deal with any requests or queries you may have."

Relann bowed again and waited a moment for the reaction. The Drazi complained immediately, the recruits shuffled their feet in nervousness, the other rangers merely sat back accepting this with no questions.

Relann walked away quickly promising to pay penance for her lie later. It may have been an honourable lie, but as of late there had been too many of them. The Entil' zha was not happy. In fact she seemed almost joyless at times to Relann. Valen said a soul without joy is a diminished soul.

Stepping in the room quickly Relann did not notice Ivanova sitting at her desk with her face engulfed by her hands. Relann almost gave a startled jump when she saw her there.

"How many of them are there?" Ivanova asked with almost indescribable disinterest. She really wasn't in the mood to be praised and revered. If she wanted that she'd of grown a couple of tentacles and posed as the centari god of passion.

"A few," Relann replied nervously. "The Drazi delegation are." She searched for the best possible way to phrase it, "waiting with great anticipation to speak with the Entil'zha."

Susan moved her hands from her face. Relann had been trained well in positive hyperbole. Unfortunately she was landed with the universe' greatest pessimist as a boss. "Oh well, how nice for them. It's a shame she's not looking forward to speaking with them." Susan gave an involuntary yawn.

"If you are not feeling well I could say for them to return tomorrow." Relann added, noticing Ivanovas' sleep deprived face.

Susan leaned back in her chair and closed her eyes. It was tempting. But then Relann would know for sure that something was wrong. Relann was nice enough, helpful, kind, courteous, like most religious caste Minbari. She was also incredible at anticipating Ivanovas needs. Susan had thought of nicknaming her "Radar," but realized that a comment like that wouldn't work on the Minbari limited knowledge of earth popular culture. Especially that of the twentieth century.

Sighing, she opened one eye lazily. "Sit down, your making me nervous," Susan mumbled. At least by talking to Relann she could kill a few minutes before making up her mind.

"As you wish," Relann complied, sitting with her head slightly bowed. Ivanova sighed with slight exasperation. Why did a culture who were so advanced, drive it into their people that to make eye contact with a higher ranking individual was disrespectful? How in the hell were you supposed to hold a conversation?

"Relann," She began. "You've been my aide for two years now, please don't bow your head to me."

Slowly Relann looked up. She felt odd looking at the Entil'zha on an equal level. The Entil'zha had been of her people's warrior caste, which made Relann slightly uneasy. Relann was old enough to remember the civil war on Minbar, and had feared the warrior caste for much of her childhood.

"So," Susan began, struggling to find a point of conversation, " How are your family?" Susan had met them at a rebirth ceremony last year.

"Well, thank you Entil'zha," Relann replied quickly, curious as to why the Entil'zha was engaging in what the humans called 'small talk'.

"Your brothers an acolyte to the grey council, isn't he?"

"Yes, he was assigned to them a month ago.

" You must be very proud." Ivanova smiled weakly.

"Father is. Mother still thinks he could have been of much more service in the An'la shok." Relann paused. Then decided that in the current situation she must enquire.

"Entil'zha," She began after taking an inaudible but deep breath, " You seem, preoccupied. As if your mind was elsewhere. I was curious as to if there was anything I could do?"

Ivanova emitted a half laugh. " Is it really that obvious?"

"In matters of the soul, we are taught when to attend, when to ask before we attend. Or when not to attend. I know that the first option would not be welcome, no matter the spirit in which it was intended, The latter, I have already tried. So I am left with the middle option."

Not the Minbari soul crap again. They were nuts on it. That whole garbage about Jeff having Valens' soul was accounted for when he became Valen. No one else since had been proved to have a Minbari soul. Susan had written off souls with any idea of happiness.

"So I have problems with my soul?" She replied, slightly biting her tongue. Relann had meant well even is she was spouting superstitious garbage.

"All problems are connected with our souls." Relann slightly nodded her head. "However for you there is a particular phrase: Seh-li-sekal. In your language it translates to - soul sick."

"Well," Ivanova sighed, "I suppose in a way, your right. I think my father had a better description for it- Insomnia."

"You're not sleeping?" Relann tilted her head slightly as she spoke.

"I sleep. But then I have these- odd dreams and I wake up and can't get back to sleep." Susan shifted in her chair with discomfort.

"What do you dream of?"

"Twenty five years ago." Susan volunteered more easily then she though she would have. "I keep dreaming about a friend of mine who died. I can hear him before he dies- what he thinks. He's in pain, and,"

Susan stammered for a moment realizing the speed with which she was speaking. "He's terrified. Then, he goes and I wake up. I've seen him for the past four nights.and it haunts me all day."

Relann looked sympathetic, as if pondering on what to say. Eventually Susan jumped in and broke the silence.

"Look," She began. "Maybe I just need to tell someone about seeing him. Maybe he just wants me to talk to someone."

Relann remained silent for a moment. Then folded her hands and began to speak. "You speak as though your friend still lives. Perhaps he does wish for you to express yourself. You think of him living, his soul is close to yours, which would account for why yours is often so far away."

Susan smiled, shook her head and glanced downward. It always came back to souls. Always.

"You're determined to make a convert of me Relann." Susan smiled at her aide.

Relann smiled back warmly. For the moment she would drop the issue for more pressing matters. "Your appointments Entil'zha?"

"Oh hell," Susan began. She shook her head, "Just tell them to go away, I eloped with a Pak'ma'ra, anything."

"I shall tell them you will see them tomorrow." Relann replied moving her chair backward and standing.

"Alright, if there's any urgent paperwork rush it over and I'll sign it." With those words hitting her ears, Relann bowed and left the room.

Now all Susan had to do was get past the Drazi.

***************************************************************

Susan had lied about doing the urgent paperwork. It was piled outside her room. She wouldn't be able to sleep with it staring at her accusingly. She had enough trouble sleeping without guilt trips from stacks of paper.

Cautiously, she rolled over in bed- being careful not to fall out. Why couldn't they make these beds a little wider?

Susan exhaled, and closed her eyes. She was beginning to drift off when she heard something in the corridor outside. Her eyes flew open and she lay as still as possible, listening. It could be an assassin, after Delenn, or maybe even her. Susan listened to the window being opened cautiously, a body dropping lightly onto its feet, gentle footsteps along, one, two, three, four, then, -

"Wahhhhhhrrr!" A high-pitched noise of pain came from the mouth of the would be assassin. At the same time the stack of unsigned paperwork crashed to the ground.

" Saved by the bureaucracy, who'd a thought?" Susan mumbled to herself jumping out of bed and grabbing a ppg. By this time several rangers were moving quickly from their guard posts to the point of entry.

Before they could arrive, the assassin less than subtly made an exit by crashing through the window it had taken so much effort to enter through quietly.

Susan stepped into the corridor to see five rangers converged on the scene, all examining the window and fallen papers.

A human ranger quickly turned to face her, "Entil'Zha, are you alright?"

"I'm Okay." Susan replied quickly, "But what the hell was that and how did it get in here?"

" I don't understand how it got through the security net." The ranger continued.

"What is going on?" Delenns' voice semi-bellowed as she stepped into the hallway.

"I think we just had an assassination attempt madam president," the ranger informed Delenn.

"In Valens name," Delenn breathed. "Are you alright Susan?"

"I'm fine," Ivanova assured her. "But I don't think I'll be sleeping much tonight."

At that moment the Human rangers link went off. He answered it swiftly. "Report?" he enquired, aware that the two leaders were waiting for answers.

"Nada." A voice came from the link. "Whatever it was it can sure pick itself up after a fall. We're sweeping the perimeter now."

"I'm sorry," The ranger began. "But it looks like it got away."

Ivanova and Delenn looked at each other, both feeling pangs of jeopardy.

(Cue music)

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Crazy ranger.

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