"No."
"Yes." He growled.
"No." I shook my head. "I mean it."
"Yes." He smirked, crossing his arms over his chest.
"NO!" I was getting irritated. "What's with you?"
"Yes."
"Seriously."
"Yes."
"You're not going to give this up, are you?" I groaned and wiped my hands over my face.
"Yes."
I stared out the windshield of the SUV, trying to look like I was doing what I was supposed to be doing. We were on a stake out for Georgie Othellus, a mid-level drug dealer on a $500k bond. Of course he skips, and Rangeman is tasked to pick them up. I am here for another set of eyes, but somehow it seems like I am just entertainment again.
"Yes." He broke the five minute silence, a smirk playing at the corner of his mouth.
"Oh my God!" I flailed my arms. "You must have been such a dick as a child."
"Meh…" He shrugged. "Yes."
"Okay…okay. Fine. YES!" I rolled my eyes. "It was me."
"I knew you would cave."
"You are such an asshole, Santos." I smacked his shoulder.
"I know." He winked at me and shimmied himself down into his seat. After a moment, the cab was filled with a noxious smell again.
"You are such a jerk." I gagged and rolled down the window.
"I know." He quickly pressed the lock button when the window was only down a couple inches. "It was you again, wasn't it?"
"Fuck off."
"After what you just did, I can't really get in the mood, Beautiful." He reached over and turned the heater on full blast, causing the stench to get worse. "But you totally did."
"NO I DIDN'T!" I shrieked.
"Santos." Came Tank's voice through the com radio. "Stop torturing Bombshell."
"Tank, she farted. It's like something died up in here."
"I DID NOT!" I was beyond mortified.
"You guys are such children." Tank grumbled, signing off.
"Beautiful?" Les looked over at me, his green eyes twinkling mischievously. "If you show me your boobs, we can end this now."
"AAARRRGGG!" I gagged again as another fresh waft of noxious flatulence filled the cab. "That's it…I'm outta here."
I ripped open the door and slammed it, making the entire SUV rock. I could hear Santos giggling as I walked down the street and over to Tank and Hal's SUV. The doors clicked, telling me that they were unlocked, and I crawled in the back.
"He is such a douchebag." I growled.
"That's Santos for you." Tank said, his gaze never leaving the skip's house.
There was a loud squeaking sound, like a huge tire deflating. Hal and Tank whipped around, faces screwed up with horror.
"Jesus." Hal said, covering his nose with his hands. "What the fuck, Bomber!"
"It wasn't me!"
"Uh huh." Tank's voice was muffled, as he too had his hand covering his face.
"What the fuck is wrong with you guys!?" I flopped back in the seat. "How is it even possible? Are you in sync or something?"
"You need some Beano? Some Tums?" Hal's shoulders were shaking with laughter.
"Fuck off." I growled, tightly crossing my arms over my chest and praying that this guy shows up quick.
"You did." Santo's voice sang through the radio.
"I DIDN'T FART!"