Disclaimer: I do not own Hyperdimension Neptunia. All characters, thoughts and ideas that exist in this story that were taken from the original works belong to their creators, Compile Heart and Idea Factory. Only original thoughts and or characters created in this story are my own.
As of this moment there are two types of page breaks:
x~X~x - This will appear when there is a complete change of scene or there is an extended time break (for example the passage of time between one day and the next).
~o~ - This will appear when there is a shift in perspective of the current scene, or the time difference between one scene and the next isn't very large and the scenes are connected.
Author's Notes: This Author's Note may seem long, but it's really the only one that I'll have in my story aside from the odd small exception here or there. It's essentially laying down some groundwork and expectations for you, my readers as well as some explanations as to why certain things may end up the way they are.
First off, while this story will have some drama (I can't not have drama in my stories) it's not going to be a major theme. This story is intended to be most humor with some seriousness mixed in. I wish to delve into an area I'm not particularly experienced or comfortable with to help my own growth as a writer, and hopefully entertain the readers at the same time.
The story will be entirely in English. Since there are full dubbed English versions of this game, and they're the only ones I have played, I'm going with that as a basis, so no Japanese honorifics or anything. If I had to decide which version of HDN this was most closely linked to, I'd say HDN MK2, as I hated Iris Heart with a passion that is almost holy and there aren't any sisters in the first. However it is NOT the MK2 dimension, it's a different dimension, more of an amalgamation of the history of the first HDN with the environment and characters of the second and elements from all other source materials (including the Re;Birth series, VII, anime and manga) added in whenever they fit. Considering the nature of the universe, I consider all source material as valid.
The fourth wall is going to break and crumble at times (that's pretty much one of the main calling cards of HDN). There will also be jokes and comments that will, unfortunately, go over the heads of those that aren't familiar with the game, or my earlier works.
I will do my utmost to keep the characters, well, in character. There is a slight problem with this as it seems that the HDN character's personalities actually change slightly from game to game and from dimension to dimension. Considering this story takes place in an entirely different Gamindustri dimension, I don't feel I need to be 100% faithful, only about 75% or so. Of course some things WILL remain, Neptune's ditzy/carefree attitude, Blanc's temper, Vert's pride in her breasts and more 'mature' attitude, Noire's tsundere, etc., etc., Basically the common elements that always seem to arise in each version I will do my utmost to retain, but there will be differences.
And finally, I'm going to go with the assumption that my readers know nothing about HDN. For those of you that do, please bear with the expositions. There is a lot to explain for those unfamiliar with the game. On the same theme if you want images to go with the explanations, check out either of the two Hyperdimension Neptunia wikias, they have a host of images that will help a lot. Just remember, when it comes to outfit, I'm going with the Hyperdimension Neptunia Mk2 outfits, not Victory (the original and Mk2 have the same outfits if I recall correctly).
One last quick note, I will be using Goddess and CPU (Console Patron Unit) interchangeably. In HDN they mean the same thing.
Now, without further ado, let's start the story!
Extra Dimension Neptunia: Malicious Code
Chapter 1: The Lazy Goddess
The heroine marched proudly down the hallway towards the pair of large, intricately carved ornate gold doors at the end. Her enchanted magical boots, a gift from the Fairy Goddess for rescuing her daughter, clicked off the beautiful marble floor with each step. To either side, in regular intervals, were delicate looking marble pillars that rose high into the air where they supported the stained glass ceiling that arched overhead.
She was decked head to toe in enchanted armor: The breastplate of the Legendary Heroine, the leg guards of the Indomitable, the Gauntlets of Annihilation, and even the super rare necklace of a thousand puddings that one had to farm a secret dogoo rare spawn in the Hidden Spring of Eternal Life a hundred times to get!
Her short purple hair was completely concealed by the Helm of the Ancients, an enchanted helmet that had been given to her by the Ancient Spirit of the Forest. It even came with the super rare +6 Appetite bonus so that she had extra room for puddings. Out from within the depths purple, eyes shone with excitement at the prospect of the battle to come.
The heroine came to a stop just before the large doors and grinned excitedly. She was going this alone, having left all her companions behind. She was the main character after all, she didn't need any help with this!
Oh, but one of them did manage to sneak out and join her. He had been with them for a while, he was a big help providing her with information and sneaking her snacks just before bedtime when the others weren't aware of it.
He was okay in her books, anyone that brought her custard pudding as a snack was A-ok!
She laid her hand on the door and took a deep breath.
"YAH!" the heroine shouted as she shoved the doors open and leapt through without a thought or care.
The room was dark, the back half was completely invisible from her vantage point. The lighting in this room was suitable for the final encounter with the big final boss. She could see pillars rising into the air all around the room, their forms dimly lit by dark purple light that seemed to sluggishly ooze their way up them.
"So you finally made it here, how pitiful, if it was me I would have been here ages ago," a soft feminine voice spoke from the dark shadows deep within the room.
"Come out and face me you villain!" the heroine shouted as she pulled out Laevataeinn, the legendary blade that was said to surpass all others, it had cost her a fortune to buy it from the shop next door. "Your reign of tyranny is at an end! Gamindustri will not become a monopoly for you to play with!"
She knew she could win, she had all the best gear, she had farmed for weeks to get it all, and she had her trusty friend supply her with custard puddings. She couldn't lose, not with a belly fully of custard pudding!
"And why should I do that? You have yet to defeat the last mini-boss," the deep, familiar voice replied.
"I HAVE beaten all of your minions! Face me like a coward!" the heroine shouted, not caring that she wasn't making any sense.
Laughter boomed off the walls, echoing endlessly around the room, making the heroine take a single hesitant step back.
"There is still one left, isn't that right, Minion A?" the voice asked.
"Yes M'Lady," the heroine's companion said as he bowed before the darkness. He stood up, drew his blade, and pointed it at the heroine, "I'm sorry, I truly am, words can't express how much it pains me to do this."
"Wait WHAT!? What sort of development is this!" the heroine cried out as she jumped to the side and whirled around to face her companion, "you're a double agent?"
"I had no choice…"
"No choice?" the voice laughed from the darkness, "You did it willingly, you did it for me, you even SUGGESTED it, and you will continue to serve me until the end!"
The heroine suddenly felt very ill, she collapsed to one knee and puked up her precious custard pudding, "Holy crapparoni, who stuck one of the horsemen of the apocalypse in my stomach?"
"I'm sorry, I really am, I laced your pudding with virus and poison," the heroine's companion said sadly.
"How could you DO such a thing! The poor pudding! What did it ever do to you?" the heroine cried out, more aghast at his affront to the pudding than his betrayal.
"Because I ordered him to," the voice spoke from the darkness once more.
"You're pure evil!" the heroine cried out as she climbed to her feet and pointed her sword at her former companion, "I won't fall here! I'm the main character!"
"I really am sorry... I lo—"
The screen went dark.
"WHAT!?" Neptune cried out in surprise and outrage as her game suddenly shut off. "No! It was just getting to the good part! I haven't saved my game in over seventy-two hours!"
"NEPTUNE! What are you doing?!" Histoire shouted at her charge angrily.
Histoire's charge, Neptune, looked like a small girl, only 146cm tall. She had vibrant purple eyes and short purple hair with long side burns with a pair of hairclips on either side of her head in the shape of white directional pads. Her clothing consisted of a pair of purple sneakers, thigh high blue and white stripped socks, and an over-sized white hoody with purple and pink striped fringes. The hoody was definitely custom made as the zipper was enormous and emblazoned with a large purple N, the pockets on either looked like miniature round, pink and white medical bags, and the elastic band used to tighten the hood were capped off with USB connectors. She wasn't wearing anything on her legs. Anyone sitting behind her as she laid stomach first on her pink bean bag would be able to see up her hoody to a pair of blue and white striped panties.
"Oh hi Histy!" Neptune said as she turned around on the bean bag she was lying on and beamed a bright smile at her Oracle, Histoire.
Histoire, Neptune's Oracle, was a small fairy like being with pink and blue wings that sat upon an open book that floated several feet off the ground. The book was special as it possessed all the knowledge of the world. Unfortunately because there was SO much knowledge, it took Histoire three days to find anything.
Histoire herself, aside from being small enough to fit in a brown paper bag and the wings, looked like an ordinary girl with bright blue eyes and brilliant golden locks that flowed down to her shoulders. She wore a thigh length purple and white dress that had purple sleeves with white cuffs that left the shoulders and upper arms bare. Thigh high white stockings covered her legs and on her feet were a pair of white shoes. A bright blue tie was held in place with a round pin with a purple N emblazoned on it. The ensemble was finished off with a white and purple tiara like headdress that that was emblazoned with a purple N as well.
Each major power in Gamindustri had an Oracle to help with the day to day tasks of running the nation. The small things were usually handled by the Oracles so that the Goddess they served could focus on the more important things, such as building shares.
Shares were the single most important currency in Gamindustri. When a resident of Gamindustri develops faith towards a particular Goddess, that Goddess gains a single share representing that particular individual. The more faith a Goddess generates, the more shares they obtain. The more shares they obtain the better and stronger the economy of the respective nation becomes. Faith translates into actual currency as someone that believes in their Goddess will go out of their way to purchase goods, such as games, systems, and plushy dolls, of their respective Goddess. This faith also aids the Goddess' themselves as they receive a significant boost in power during their Hard Drive Divinity (HDD) transformation.
Neptune was the Goddess of one of those major powers, Planeptune, and Histoire was her Oracle.
A Goddess, sometimes called a Console Patron Unit or CPU, had two names; one for her normal state, one for her transformed state. Neptune was the name of Planeptune's CPU in her normal state, while Purple Heart was her name in her HDD form.
"Why are you just lazing around all day?!" Histoire shouted at Neptune, "A Goddess has many important duties they—"
"Oh, that stuff can all wait for another day," Neptune said as reached over to her console to turn it back on.
The screen remained dark.
"Huh?" Neptune said curiously as she peered around the back of the console.
A pulsating vein appeared on Histoire's forehead, "NEPTUNE!"
"Ah ha!" She found the problem, "have you seen the power cord Histy?" Neptune asked curiously, noticing that it appeared to be missing from the console.
"Stop ignoring me Neptune!" Histoire shouted at the small purple-haired girl.
"Oh! There it is!" Neptune said as she glanced across the room and saw it embedded in the door. She clambered off the beanbag and started for the power cord. "I'm not ignoring you Histy, it's just I was out last week doing Goddessy type stuff, ya know, working my butt off isn't good for my complexion."
"THAT WAS LAST YEAR!" Histoire raged.
"Oh, has it been that long?" Neptune asked, pausing in her stride, "Sorry, I completely lost track of time," she apologized as she knuckled her forehead.
A paper was suddenly thrust in front of Neptune's face.
"Our shares have been steadily declining. The people are losing faith in you," Histoire said as she slapped the paper with a small pointer, "Our shares are down fifteen percent from last year. We're barely above ten percent!"
"Ah that's plenty!" Neptune said cheerfully.
"No it's not!" Histoire cried out, "We used to have over thirty percent of the shares a few years ago! If you don't start taking your duties seriously we'll reach a point where we'll never recover and then we'll…" the small fairy swallowed hard, "bankrupt."
"Oh you worry too much, Histy," Neptune said as she waved away her Oracle's concerns.
"That means no more custard puddings," Histoire said as she fired off her secret weapon.
"WHAT!? No! Come on Histy we gotta hit the turbo and get a move on!" Neptune said in a panic as she grabbed her small fairy friend and shot off through the door.
"Wait Neptuneeeeee…." Histoire cried out as she was dragged along behind her charge at breakneck speeds out of the Basilicom.
The Basilicom was the center of each nation, Neptune called her Basilicom 'Nep Tower.' It was made up of two sections, The Parliament and the Sanctuary. The Parliament was where all the real work got done and was usually headed by the Oracle of each nation. The Oracle had a number of underlings to take care of the basic day to day workings while they oversaw everything on behalf of the Goddess. As a result the Goddess was the ultimate authority in the nation as the Oracle would dictate orders to their staff based on the Goddess' desires.
Of course there were exceptions, such as one particular purple-haired lazy Goddess that felt it was more important to play games all day rather than be useful.
The second part of the Basilicom, the Sanctuary, was where the Goddess usually resided. Most assumed it was a great holy place where the Goddesses were busy being a Goddess, few suspected the truth, and only the Oracle and the Goddesses' closest friends knew for certain.
The 'Sanctuaries' where little more than oversized bedrooms specifically designed to indulge the Goddess' petty whims.
Neptune stopped as she ran out the main entrance of the Basilicom and took a long look around her.
The city was bathed in a soft blue glow that seemed to illuminate its surroundings. Only Basilicom was different, being bathed in a purple glow that mimicked the favorite color of their Goddess.
The city was vast and seemed to stretch endlessly in all directions. The city looked as if it was pulled straight from the future. Sleek, elegant curves and gentle edges was the common theme among the buildings, many of them towering hundreds of feet into the night sky. The tallest building of them all was the Basilicom, located in the very heart of the city and surrounded by a beautiful and perfectly manicured park. The Basilicom stretched nearly a mile into the sky with a majesty that words couldn't describe.
It was a breathtaking sight, one that even Neptune, who had lived here her entire life, couldn't help but pause to admire.
"Why's it so dark outside?" Neptune asked curiously.
"Because it's nighttime!" Histoire snapped as she floated around dizzily.
"What?! Why didn't you say anything?" Neptune asked as she whirled around to face her Oracle.
"Because you ran out before I could finish!"
"I missed my afternoon snack," Neptune said in a downcast voice, looking for all the world like someone had just kicked her puppy.
What little was left of Histoire's patience shattered like glass, "Inside! NOW!" Histoire snapped at Neptune as a large angry vein pulsated furiously on her forehead. She pointed towards the doors of the Basilicom imperiously, "Move!"
"WHOA! Histy just went all Pisty!" Neptune shouted in surprise, taking an involuntary step back.
"Don't 'whoa' me missy!" Histoire snapped as she got in Neptune's face. "You're going to march yourself back into the Basilicom where you're then going to wash your face, take a bath, go to sleep, and then get up BRIGHT and EARLY tomorrow morning…"
With each word Histoire bit out, Neptune was forced back another step. There was a harried and panicked look on Neptune's face as Histoire forced her backwards into the Basilicom and into her room. Before she even realized what she was doing she was stripped naked and in the bath, hastily rubbing soap all over her body.
Histoire kept her lecture up the entire time, not letting her charge get a single word of protest in.
… and finally, I'll have IF come over to make sure you do your job properly, I'm empowering her with the authority to punish you if you slack off tomorrow!" Histoire said as finished her tirade.
By this time Neptune was in her bed, dressed in her pajamas, with the covers pulled up over her head as if to place a barrier between her and the tiny woman floating above her like a vengeful Goddess.
"Am I perfectly clear Neptune?"
"Yes Histy!" Neptune quickly replied in a small voice.
"Good," Histoire said in satisfaction as she turned and left the room.
x~X~x
"Do you have everything Neptune?" Histoire asked as she floated around the purple-haired CPU, inspecting her.
"I sure do!" Neptune replied cheerfully as she pumped her fist into the air. "I have my socks, and clean underwear, and my pudding!"
"What about your weapon?"
"It's right here!" Neptune held her hands out in front of her and summoned a blade into her hands. She started in surprise when a simple bamboo practice sword materialized in her hands. "What? Where is my special sword?"
"It's worse than I feared," a new voice spoke up from across the room. "You're too low a level to wield it, Neptune, you're level 1."
The two of turned to the newcomer.
The woman standing just inside the front entrance of the Sanctuary was none other than IF, a fair skinned girl with very long, waist length brunette hair, part of which was pulled to the side in a ponytail held with a fashionable green leaf-like ribbon of unknown material.
She wore a very large blue jacket several sizes too big with black and silver lining, adorned with silver buttons. The lower end of the jacket dipped down past her knees and consisted of brown fur lining. The sleeves had black bands with white lining wrapped around the ends and reached out far past the ends of her hands, concealing them from view. The coat was undone, as IF rarely buttoned up even in frigid weather, to show a revealing black and silver tank top and a pair of shorts with a large belt. On the left side of her over-sized coat was a holster that contained nine different cellphones of varying colors from pink to blue to orange and more. On her feet was a pair of blue boots to match her jacket and a pair of medium length black socks.
She was one of Neptune's closest friends and one of the few sources of sanity Histoire could rely upon. While IF had the tendency to be a bit sarcastic she had a solid head on her shoulders, was logical, and very serious when it came to doing jobs. She was also one of the few that could rein Neptune in when she was outside of her HDD transformation.
A relief filled expression crossed Histoire's face when they saw IF but Neptune was anything but happy.
"WHAT?! Level 1? But why? I've been leveling like crazy in my games."
"Games don't translate into real life, Nep," IF said as she walked across the room towards her friend, there was a grace in her movement that bespoke of years of training and experience. "You've been sitting on your ass for over a year, it makes sense that your skills have dissolved into nothing."
"But you're not level 1!" Neptune protested, pointing at IF's fancy level 51 hovering just to the side.
"And why would I be? I've been doing quests all this time," IF said as she stopped a few feet away from Neptune.
"This is so totally not cool, I say we hunt down the bastard that hacked my character and took away all my levels!" Neptune shouted as she pumped the air with her fist.
"I think we'd be better off figuring out who hacked your brain and downloaded stupid into it," IF retorted dryly with a deadpanned expression on her face.
"You're going to go out and do quests to raise the shares of Planeptune!" Histoire shouted down at her charge. She turned to IF and gave her another smile, "It is good of you to come," she said as she floated over to IF, "Neptune has been lazing about all day."
"It's not a problem Histoire."
"Hey, hey, Iffy! What are we doing today, are we going to go out and slay Ancient Dragons?" Neptune asked excitedly. "I can get my levels back really quick if we grind those all day long."
"Not with you dragging me down like dead weight," IF said bluntly as she glanced down at the bamboo practice sword in Neptune's hand.
"Ouch! That hurts Iffy!" Neptune said pitifully as she held a hand to her heart.
"You're only level one now," IF stated flatly as she poked Neptune's forehead and activated her status sheet. IF jerked her thumb at Neptune's HP bar and stats, "you only have a thousand HP and five hundred defense, there's no way you're fighting Ancient Dragons like that, it'd chew you up and spit you out in a second. You've spent too much time sitting on your ass."
"Awww…" Neptune pouted.
"I trust you will handle things from here?" Histoire asked IF.
"Yes," IF said as she gave Histoire an understanding look. Neptune was a handful to deal with on the best of days. IF glanced over at Neptune and nodded her head towards the door, "come on, let's head to the Guild, they'll have some quests for someone as low level as you."
"Maybe we can fight some low level Ancient Dragons," Neptune said excitedly as she rushed for the door, suddenly much more energized about going out.
"Ancient dragons don't come any lower than level 50," IF said, there was another deadpanned look on her face as she walked after her friend.
Neptune turned around and waved at Histoire when she reached the door. "Can you have some tastetacular snacks ready for us when we get home Histy?"
"I'm not your maid!" Histoire shouted at Neptune.
"Oh don't be such a downer, I can't wait for tonight, I want some of your special pudding!" Neptune said as she excitedly left the Basilicom. IF gave Histoire a sympathetic look and followed after.
Histoire let out a sigh of relief as the door closed behind IF and subconsciously headed for the kitchen. With Neptune out of her hair for a while she could actually get some work done. Although she wouldn't trade Neptune for anyone else, the purple-haired girl certainly tried her patience at times.
And perhaps Neptune could even regain some of the shares she had let slip through her fingers, miracles did happen from time to time.
But she was most certainly NOT going to have some snacks ready for Neptune when she returned. She kept that thought firmly in her mind as she looked around the kitchen for the sugar.
x~X~x
Planeptune looked much different during the day than at night. While at night the city was bathed in a soft blue look that made it look very futuristic, during the day the green came out. The city was covered with parks, trees, plants and other greenery. There was little in the way of 'personal' homes in Planeptune, all the dwellings were in large buildings that offered anything from a small bachelor pad to spacious multi-level condominiums. This, combined with the spacious design of the city, allowed for wide swaths of parkland to be laid down between the various sections of the city.
There were no roads in Planeptune, at least none for personal travel. All the 'roads' in Planeptune were given over to mass transit or path walks for pedestrian to stroll through the various parks and city blocks. There were also plenty of large maglev railways for transporting goods from location to location. To get from place to place without mass transit one used their own two legs, although this was aided through the use of skyways.
Skyways were invisible elevated walkways. They used precision scanners to pinpoint your exact location and created a small platform under your feet to stand on. This platform was then pushed through the skyways at a rapid pace, usually rivaling the speed of most vehicles. So long as you remained in the skyway you could walk or move however you liked. The system would simply recalculate your position and create a new platform as you stepped off the current. To go from one location to another, you literally walked and the skyway aided your travel by speeding it up.
It didn't take very long for the two of them, Neptune and IF, to travel from the Basilicom to the Guild. The guild was one of the central points of each of the major cities, some argued it was almost as important as the Basilicom in its own way. As a result they were usually located fairly close to the Basilicom itself.
"Where is Compa?" Neptune asked as the two stepped off the skyway and onto solid ground.
That caused a twinge in IF's heart. Managing Neptune would be far easier, and much more tolerable, if Compa was here at her side. Unfortunately Compa was busy for the entire week. "She's studying for her medical exam, her exam is this Saturday," IF said as she started for the front entrance to the Guild, a long set of sliding glass doors.
"That's like a total bummer, she's usually glued to your side like a pair of wet panties."
"What the hell are you talking about?"
"Well her panties have been wet lately, and she's always at your side so…"
"WHAT WERE YOU DOING WITH HER PANTIES?"
The air went silent as everyone on that platform stopped to stare at IF. IF blushed a bright crimson at her outburst and moderated her tone. "Stop going through other people's stuff!" she hissed at Neptune in a whisper.
"Oh! I get it now, she's gotten herself a boyfriend!" Neptune said, her eyes brightening as realization dawned on her.
"She's does NOT have a boyfriend!" IF refused to believe that Compa had a boyfriend, that was impossible, no way. IF would kill any man that dared lay a hand on her Compa. Besides… "I already told you she's studying for her exam!"
"Well of –course- she's studying for her medical exam, she wants to play 'doctor,'" Neptune said, crossing her arms across her chest and nodding sagely.
IF twitched violently. She had a sudden urge to reach out and strangle Neptune a little. It took an incredible amount of impressive self-control not to. Fearing where the direction the discussion was headed, IF ceased any further conversation on that particular topic. Neptune was impossible to deal with when she became like this. It was best just to ignore her and move on, she'd drop the topic soon enough. She was the poster child for Hyper ADD.
IF tuned Neptune out the rest of the way to the entrance of the Guild. The Guild, while not nearly as impressive as the Basilicom, was still one of the largest structures in Planeptune with a wide, spacious platform that encircled the building. The main entrance was actually several hundred feet above the ground. The ground level and near ground level entrances were reserved for employees or transport vehicles carrying supplies.
As they entered the Guild IF's eyes lit up as she saw some friends heading towards them, "Otome, Mate, Neverlan, you three on an assignment?" IF asked as the three girls.
"Y-Yes," Otome stuttered as she looked shyly at IF, her cheeks tinted with a hint of pink.
"There are rumors of something pretty nasty brewing on an island off the west coast," Neverlan said as she walked up to IF and placed a hand on her shoulder, "the invitation is still there, we could use your ability to find hidden traps and secret doors."
"I'd love to, but I have some babysitting to do today," IF said with a shake of her head.
"Babysitting? Really who?" Neptune asked eagerly.
A sweat drop rolled down the side of IF's head. She refused to answer that question with the other three here. No need to make the shares of Planeptune drop even more due to her snarky remarks.
"Well, if you finish early you can come catch up," Neverlan said with a smile, "whatever it is out west it has the Guild nervous."
IF frowned, she didn't like the sound of that, "is it really that bad?"
Neverlan laughed and shrugged her shoulders, "Who knows, all the people that have gone out there recently simply disappeared. They were all weak newbie adventurers, few were over level fifteen. The monsters there are easily twice that level so they were probably all just beaten by monsters." Neverlan wasn't too overly worried, Otome was level forty-six, Mate was forty-eight and she was almost fifty. More than enough to handle anything the indigenous monsters island could throw at them, even without IF's help. "People rarely go out there anyways, not much point, there's nothing there worth risking your life over. That and the monsters have always been abnormally strong out there, it's essentially a lawless zone since none of the Goddess' seem to want to claim it."
"Be careful," IF said seriously, she didn't like what she was hearing. Sure young weak adventurers were constantly being caught off guard out there, the islands out there were just off the coast of low level zones, but usually they were able to flee fast enough to get out with only a few scars and some stories to tell. From time to time reports of deaths did come in, but they were rather infrequent.
The fact that the adventurers simply disappeared hinted at something much different than getting beaten by monsters. If someone died it would be immediately recorded by the system, if their deaths aren't recorded it means they were alive somewhere.
"Don't worry, we're just going to head out, do a quick survey of the area, and be back, what could go wrong?" Neverlan asked with a laugh as she turned to her two friends, "come on, let's go! The boat won't wait for us forever."
"A-Actually, i-it will," Otome said as she quickly fell in step beside Neverlan. The ships in Gamindustri always waited for major characters to arrive. It was the NPCs without proper descriptions that were forced to wait for the ship to come.
Otome turned on her heel and gave IF a quick bow before she whirled back around and hurried after her party leader.
Mate simply gave IF a nod as she hurried after the other two, she never spoke unless it was really important.
"Wow, she said the most taboo words you could possibly say before going out," Neptune marveled as the party left the building.
IF sighed in exasperation, "I know, that's Neverlan for you, whenever she utters 'what could go wrong?' everything goes wrong," the brunette said as she trudged towards the front desk where the quests were assigned, "I still remember the first time she said that when we were just starting out. It was supposed to be a simple 'kill X number of dogoo's' mission."
"What happened? Did you get thrown into incredibly embarrassing and perverted situations?" Neptune asked curiously. She'd never heard about this story.
"It took me three days to get all that slime off me," IF said as her eyebrow twitched violently. It had taken another two months for the smell to go away, "I had slime in places slime really doesn't belong." Up to that point she had never before felt so violated in her life, although it did pale in comparison to some of the other problems Neverlan's overly optimistic attitude ended up dropping their group into later.
She couldn't look at squid anymore after one particular mission, she used to enjoy eating the stuff too.
The worst part about it was that Neverlan always seemed to come out unscathed, it was always IF and Otome that ended up suffering the most. The two had developed a close bond as a result, companions in misery.
"There sure are a lot of quests here," Neptune said as her eyes roamed up and down the list of quests. The list was a holographic display that expanded and showed the details of a particular quest if you hovered your hand in front of one.
"Those are for A-Rank missions, the E-Rank ones are over here," IF said as she pulled Neptune along behind her as she headed down the counter.
"But there was a quest to slay an Ancient Dragon there!"
"We're not hunting Ancient Dragons!" IF snapped back, she wouldn't have any qualms about fighting one with Neverlan and the others, they had killed several already, but she wasn't going to try and solo one herself, Neptune being as weak as she was would just be dead weight in that sort of battle.
She plopped Neptune down in front of the E-Rank mission lists. "These are the quests we'll be doing." E-Rank was the only one that had multiple holographic protections. There was an endless supply of low level, newbie quests for beginners to start on.
"Aww," Neptune pouted as her eyes scanned the lists, "alright, let's do this one!" she said as she poked one of the quests.
"Kill ten dogoos in Virtua Forest," IF said aloud as she read the name of the quest. The quest expanded and displayed more information including recommended strategies and information about the client. IF ignored that stuff, it rarely mattered outside of courier missions, and scrolled down to the information until she reached the pertinent stuff, "Recommended Levels, one to five, reward: one thousand credits and two percent increase in Planeptune shares. This'll do."
"Think we'll fight any Ancient Dragons?" Neptune asked curiously.
A vein popped on IF's forehead, "no, there aren't any Ancient Dragons in Virtua Forest and we wouldn't fight them even if there were." It would be a nightmare if there were, the forest was a well-known lowbie grinding spot. There would be lots of deaths and incidents if one did appear. It would also have been big news and taken down quite quickly by higher level adventurers.
That was why IF was certain they wouldn't face one. She'd have heard of it by now and it would already be defeated before they even got to the forest.
There were big rewards for taking out dangerous monsters in low level areas.
IF accepted the quest and quickly choose a few other gathering quests to go with it. Between the gathering nodes and monster drops they would be able to easily complete those quests while hunting for ten dogoos. Their rewards were less than the hunting one but in all told they'd bring in twenty-five hundred credits some healing items and a five percent increase in Planeptune shares.
"Alright! Let's get going! I want my levels back ASAP!" Neptune
x~X~x
The World of Gamindustri was essentially one giant continent in the shape of an upside down crescent. There were many islands surrounding the main landmass, including a large island that was almost one third the size of the main continent nestled inside the arch of the main land. Across these landmasses it was split into five zones. The first zone was comprised of the western and southwestern parts of the main continent and was ruled by Neptune from Planeptune. The second zone was made up of eastern and southeastern parts of the main continent and was ruled by a different Goddess from the capital of Lastation. The northern part of the continent was ruled by yet a third Goddess from its capital of Lowee.
There was a fourth Goddess and she ruled the large island nestled in the crook of the main continent from her lofty perch in Leanbox.
Each zone was named after the capital city from which they were ruled from.
The fifth, and last zone, wasn't ruled by anyone. It belonged to those that didn't want anything to do with the Goddess, or whom the Goddess didn't want anything to do with. This included the majority of the islands that surrounded the main continent.
Virtua Forest resided in Planeptune, just on the outskirts of the city itself, was one of several different low level areas that surrounded the city. It was a beautiful place, the grass was always green, the flowers and trees were always in full bloom. Gentle rolling hills went on for as far as the eye could see.
While this particular location was considered part of Virtua Forest, it looked more like open grasslands with a few trees to break the monotony. The forest got thicker the further one went in, but the monsters got more dangerous and the level requirements went up as well. The dogoos they were tasked with clearing out however liked the sunlight and open fields, they wouldn't find them in the depths.
Or at least this was where one would normally find the dogoos.
IF frowned in worry as she danced around the Radisher, her katars igniting as they flashed through the air, "Demon Comet Slash!" The Radisher exploded into a cloud of pixels as IF obliterated the enemy with a single move consisting of a dozen lightning quick cuts.
"These guys are nothing!" Neptune said as she smacked the last Radisher in the back, sending it back to the compiler in pieces.
"They're all low level monsters," IF said as she glanced around the field, one hand on her hip and another shielding her eyes as she scanned the horizon.
"I've gained four levels since coming here," Neptune said cheerfully, "I'll be back in tip-top shape in no time."
"Congrats, you're level 5, but we have a problem."
"What's the problem! I'll solve it lickity split."
"There's no dogoos."
Neptune's exuberance was instantly cooled. She glanced around like IF and noticed that there weren't any dogoos anywhere. There had been plenty when they had first arrived, they had killed their first six rather easily, and quickly, the next three had been rather difficult to find, they'd all been hiding in bushes.
They had still yet to find the tenth, and last, one they needed.
But now that Neptune thought about it, it had been almost three hours since the last time they fought a dogoo. All they've been fighting are Tulip's and Radishers with the odd Horsebird mixed in.
And even the Horsebirds seem to have disappeared.
Neptune shrugged and a huge smile crossed her face again, "Ah, who cares about the small stuff!"
"We need one more dogoo to complete the quest…"
"But we finished the other ones right?"
"Well, ya…"
"Then let's just grind until the dogoos come back!" Neptune shouted as she charged towards another pile of Radishers and Tulips. "I want my weapon back!"
"You're level five, you should be able to upgrade your weapon," IF shouted back as she chased after her friend.
"Oh!" Neptune said in surprise and stopped. She threw her bamboo training sword away and stuck her hands out before her, "come to me oh mighty Laevateinn!"
A tachi appeared in her hands.
"Whaaaat?" Neptune cried out as she stared at the simple metal blade, "Where's my legendary Laevateinn?"
"That's a level forty-five weapon, you're not going to be able to wield it any time soon," IF said as she came up beside the flighty Goddess.
"That's not fair! Why do you get to wield those fancy things but I can't!" Neptune complained as she pointed at IF's weapons, a pair of brilliant katars that glowed with an unearthly light.
True Freak Diamonds. They were a pair of the strongest katars in Gamindustri. There were only three sets of claws and katars stronger than them. Two of them were in a Post-Game dungeon that she, Neverlan and the others were planning on tackling soon.
She had the third pair, King's Claws, as backup. She disliked claws, preferring Katars over them. Since she could basically one-hit-kill anything in Virtua Forest, even without any weapons, she had opted to use the more elegant of her two weapons.
"Because I didn't slack off for over a year playing games and let my skills dull into nothing," IF shot back.
"Ouch, Iffy, stop saying logical things! It hurts!" Neptune said as she held her chest in pain.
"Get ready Neptune, we've aggro'd the enemies," IF said as she readied herself to attack the weak enemies.
"Whoa! You're so totally right, looks like we bagged us a boss monster!" Neptune said as she stared at something behind IF.
"I know you're stupid Nep, but even you can't honestly consider these…" she waved her katar at a bunch of Radishers and Tulips that were quaking in terror, "as 'boss' monsters."
"Of course not silly, I'm talking about the Ancient Dragon," Neptune said lightly, "you know, the one that's sort of drooling on us like he just laid eyes on a nice juicy steak."
IF looked at Neptune and sighed in exasperation. Sometimes she couldn't keep up with Neptune and her fantasies. "How many times do I have to say it? There are no Ancient Dragon's…" a large shadow fell over her. She slowly turned, "in…" her eyes started to trail up the enormous creature that had come up behind them, "… Virtua…" red eyes glowered down at the two of them malevolently. "Forest…"
There was an Ancient Dragon in Virtua Forest…
"Neptune… back up, real slow like," IF said quietly as she took her own advice and took one small step back. If they played their cards right they would be able to flee before the creature was able to act.
"Hiyah!" Neptune shouted as she smacked the ankle of the powerful creature.
The blade of the tachi snapped off the thick hide, doing no damage.
IF blinked.
Neptune blinked.
The Ancient Dragon yawned.
"WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?" IF screamed at Neptune hysterically.
"That didn't work too well," Neptune said as she eyed her broken tachi. "Do you think it's like using a God Mode cheat or something?"
The dragon let out an enormous roar, shaking leaves off the trees and scattering the wild life in all directions.
"WHOA!" Neptune cried out as she felt a hand grab her hood and yank her off her feet. She suddenly found herself airborne as she trailed behind an IF who was beating a hasty retreat.
The dragon let out a second roar and quickly took up chase.
"DAMN YOU NEVERLAN!" IF cried out angrily as she hoofed it as fast as she could.
"Who knew that phrase was contagious…" Neptune said as she looked at the Ancient Dragon that was rapidly approaching, "you may want to hit the turbo boosters Iffy, the dragon's getting closer."
"You don't need to tell me that!" IF snapped as she grabbed a nearby Radisher and tossed it over her shoulder to Neptune.
"What do you want me to do with this?" Neptune asked as she held the shivering Radisher in her hands.
"THROW IT!"
"Gotcha!" Neptune said as she whipped the Radisher at the charging dragon.
The Radisher screamed.
The Ancient Dragon batted the Radisher away without a second glance. It disappeared into the horizon with a twinkle. It was far more interested in the two delicious pieces of meat running away from it and it was most certainly not a vegan dragon.
The Tulip that followed faired the same fate.
As did the next several poor creatures IF had Neptune toss in the path of the rampaging dragon.
"Oh a dogoo!" Neptune said happily as IF tossed the slime over her shoulder. "Take this dragon!" the small goddess shouted as she threw it at dragon.
"NO!" IF cried out, too late to stop Neptune, "That was for the quest!"
"Oh whoops, sorry!" Neptune said apologetically. "I got so into throwing helpless little critters at the evil rampaging dragon that I like totally forgot."
"ARGH!" IF shouted as she threw Neptune ahead of her. There was a slightly crazed and insane look on IF's face as she jumped and spun in mid-air, "DEMONIC INFERNO!" she shouted as she hurled a series of fireballs behind her.
The dogoo squirmed painfully for a moment before the balls of fire reduced it to pixels. The resulting explosion damaged the Ancient Dragon as well, but only marginally.
The words QUEST COMPLETED flashed across IF's eyes, bringing a hint of sanity and relief back to the stressed out woman.
As IF finished her spin and landed on her feet she held a hand out and snagged a falling Neptune from the air and bolted down the path back to Planeptune even faster than before.
The Ancient Dragon continued after them with renewed vigor. Before, it had simply chased them to eat the two, now it wanted to get revenge for the pain they had caused him.
The dragon opened its jaws and brilliant blue light began to appear from deep within his throat.
"HOLY CRAP!" IF shouted and dove to the side. A massive beam of energy shot past her, digging a deep trench into the ground.
"These are pretty good," Neptune said as she munched on some hotdogs.
"What the hell Neptune?!" IF cried out as she glanced behind her and saw her charge happily munching away.
"I saw him charging the hyper beam so I brought out some hotdogs and cooked them," Neptune said cheerfully. She was still airborne, her legs stretched out horizontally behind her as IF dragged her along by her hood. "Want one?" Neptune asked as she offered IF a grilled hotdog.
"NO I DON'T WANT A HOTDOG!" A panicking IF said. "AND WHERE THE HELL IS THAT CONVINENT PLOT DEVICE WHEN YOU NEED IT?!" The stressed out brunette was more than fed up with the current plot course.
"Oh! I think I see it! We have incoming!" Neptune said as she waved up at something, "Hiyo!"
"What? Incoming?" IF asked in confusion. Was the plot device finally here? Was it a high level group of adventurers that just happened to be passing through here? She sure hoped so as the average level of most parties that came through here was under ten. They'd be too low level to help with the Ancient Dragon.
"Yup! Pirates!"
"Pirates?" Now IF was utterly confused, they were in the middle of a forest, they were miles away from any significant body of water.
"Yup! Right there!" Neptune said as she pointed up into the sky.
IF glanced behind her.
A large sweat drop rolled down the back of her head and a deadpanned expression crossed her face. Well… she knew where that convenient plot device was.
BOOM!
A large galleon slammed into the Ancient Dragon. The dragon let out an indignant squawk as it was buried into the ground. The ship exploded into a million pieces from the force of the impact. There was the sound of breaking glass as the Ancient Dragon disappeared into pixels, getting 1-hit-ko'd by the flying galleon.
IF and Neptune were picked off their feet and hurled through the air.
Or rather, IF was picked off her feet and hurled, Neptune was already airborne.
The two of them landed together in a tangle of limbs some ways away from the impact zone.
"Ow," Neptune grumbled as she untangled herself from her friend and picked herself up off the ground. "You don't think there was anyone on that do you?" she asked in concern as she stared at the wreckage.
"If there was they aren't anymore," IF said as she slowly stood, brushing the dirt and grass off her clothes, "not many could survive that level of crash."
"Why was there a ship flying through the air?" Neptune asked IF as she slowly made her way towards the ruined ship.
"I don't know, but for some reason I'm not as surprised as I should be," IF said as she trudged along behind her friend.
Something like this wasn't an everyday occurrence. In fact this was the first time IF had ever been saved from an Ancient Dragon by a flying ship. However expecting the crazy was just something you learned to accept and deal with when hanging around Neptune. For some reason nothing was able to stay 'normal' around her friend for very long.
She was almost as bad as Neverlan in that regard.
Almost.
"FUYAH!" a voice from within the wreckage shouted.
There was an explosion of wood fragments as someone burst out from within the ruined ship.
Neptune and IF stopped and stared at the individual. She was a fair skinned woman with short red hair, which was held up by a metal band, and brown eyes. She wore a very short white tank top, that barely covered more than her breasts, under a small blue and white jacket with gold accents. Her skirt was white with thick strips of blue in the center and was worn with a brown belt with gold details. Clipped on to the belt was a small orange and black pouch. On her legs were a pair of blue boots with white and gold accents over thigh high stockings. On her hands were a pair of fingerless black gloves.
There was a small instrument case lying at her feet.
"Whew, I thought I was done for," the red head said as she bent down and picked up her case and slung it over her shoulder.
"Falcom?" IF gaped at the woman.
"IF!" Falcom said in surprise as she saw the two people standing near her for the first time, "what are you doing in such a low level area?"
"You know her Iffy?" Neptune asked curiously.
"Well ya, we've worked together on occasion."
"Oops, manners, sorry," Falcom apologized to Neptune and stuck her hand out to her, "I'm Falcom. As you can tell from my garb, I'm just a stock adventuress, and who might you be?"
"I'm Neptune!" The purple-haired Goddess said as she shook Falcom's hand.
"Neptune… Neptune… where have I heard that name before?" Falcom said as her head tilted thoughtfully.
"This is your illustrious Goddess," IF said with a sigh. Despite being a roaming adventurer that accepted quests from every nation, she was ultimately someone from Planeptune and as a result looked up to the CPU of Planeptune, Neptune.
"Oh! That's right! But aren't you supposed to be, I dunno, taller? With larger breasts and a curvy figure that most women would kill to have?" Falcom asked as she eyed Neptune up and down critically.
"That's her HDD form," IF explained.
"I see, are we still on for next week?" Falcom asked IF.
"It may be delayed a bit, Neverlan, Otome and Mate went out west on a guild quest," IF explained. The five of them were going to explore a new Post-Game dungeon that had just recently appeared. Five was the largest party size one could have in Gamindustri. Any more than that and people had to either be left behind or be used as support.
"Woohoo! I'm level thirty-five now!" Neptune said happily as she checked her statistics, there were a series of menus opened up before her. The stats listed there were magnitudes higher than they had been at the start.
"How? That shouldn't be…" IF trailed off and her eyes widened in realization. The ancient dragon was worth half a million experience points. And with all the rested experience Neptune had built up over the last year, that was easily boosted to at least a full million.
Couple that with how low level she was, the fact that experience gain didn't really slow until level forty, and that they had 'technically' been in combat with the dragon when the galleon had crashed into it, it all made sense.
"I can't believe it… you have the dumbest luck I have ever seen, Neptune," IF groaned and held her head in her hands.
She glanced at her own stats and confirmed her suspicions. She herself had gone up a level, she was now fifty-two. The two of them had gotten credit for the kill.
Speaking of credits, they had both received a rather sizeable increase to their bank accounts.
"I'm awesome," Neptune said as she held out her hands and summoned a new weapon. This time the katana Demon Blade: Curse, appeared in her hands. "This is more like it!" the purpled-haired goddess said as she swung her demonic looking katana around.
"We're heading home Neptune," IF said, her eyes still covered by her hands. She couldn't believe the dumb crap that had happened to her today. Thankfully their quests were done and they could go home. She didn't want to deal with anything else today.
"I think I'll tag along as well," Falcom said as she walked up beside IF.
"Thank you, you have no idea how nice it is to have someone that isn't insane to talk to," IF said as she started to trudge back to town.
"Neptune can't be that bad," Falcom said as she fell into step beside IF.
IF gave her a sidelong glance, "You have no idea, but you will, by the time we make it back to town, you will."
"Hey! Wait up Iffy, Commy!" Neptune cried out as she hurried to catch up to IF.
"Commy?" Falcom asked with a raised eyebrow.
"Neptune gives everyone nicknames…"
"How did you get the ship to fly?" Neptune asked curiously as she joined the two of them.
IF perked up at that. Neptune actually had a point there, "Ya, how did you get here? That type of ship can't fly."
"I was sailing back to Planeptune from Leanbox when the ship was attacked," Falcom said, tilting her head and placing a finger on her cheek as she thought back to earlier in the day. "I tried to fight it off, with help from the other sailors, but it was to no avail. An octopus monster pulled all the sailors into the depths."
"I hate tentacles!" IF said as she shuddered violently
Falcom nodded in understanding, she had been there when that traumatic incident had happened to IF, it was completely understandable to hate tentacles after that. IF had only barely managed to preserve Otome's, and her own, purity at the last second due to some quick thinking.
The tentacles had mercilessly assaulted the rest of their bodies but she had managed to keep the most sacred of places safe long enough for Mate and Falcom to cut them free.
Now that Falcom thought about it, it was around that time that Otome started to get really shy around IF.
"Well the octopus tried to take me too but I was too quick for it. Eventually it got fed up and threw the ship and that's how I ended up here," Falcom said as she wrapped up her story.
"I don't know whether or not to consider that lucky or unlucky."
On one hand her timely arrival had saved the both of them, but on the other hand her ship had been attacked yet again.
"At least it wasn't sunk this time," Falcom said with a laugh, "I'm getting tired of having to swim ashore every time. It's a pain to dry out these clothes, and everyone just stares at me when I do."
"Perhaps they'd stop staring if you didn't walk around naked," IF pointed out. Falcom was one of her more normal friends, but considering who she normally dealt with it wasn't very hard to fit into that category. Aside from her habit of walked around in the nude whenever she needed to dry her clothing, she was pretty normal.
IF could easily accept that much if that was Falcom's only eccentricity, at least it didn't land HER into trouble. Neptune and Neverlan managed that well enough as it was.
"I can't very well dry my clothes off by wearing them," Falcom replied.
"That's what spare clothes are for."
"I tried bringing spares, but they always got wet as well," Falcom said with a shrug. "Besides it's much easier to swim to shore when you're not dragging an extra set of wet clothing behind you."
IF sighed and gave up, considering how frequently Falcom found herself ship wrecked, that actually made sense to her. Just about every second ship Falcom took ended up sinking forcing the woman to swim ashore, which translated into about every other week. You didn't want to carry a lot of extra baggage when that happened on a frequent basis.
It happened so often IF had taken to carrying a swim suit with her whenever she took a ship with Falcom, just so she had something to change into when she inevitably had to swim ashore.
"Wow, things went from a hectic life threatening situation to X-Rated in a jiffy," Neptune said cheerfully as she eyed Falcom's chest, "you don't seem all that put out by giving everyone a show."
"Oh it's not all that bad, at least not anymore," Falcom said as she stopped and set her music case down, "check this out!"
Falcom ripped her clothes from her body.
"Oooaahhh!" Neptune gasped and pointed at Falcom's chest, "those are the special censorship lights that games and movies always use to hide the naughty bits!"
"Yup!" Falcom said as she thrust her chest out proudly, despite that you couldn't see much as it was completely obscured by a rather annoying ray of light, "a couple attached themselves to me when I got ship wrecked off the shore of R-18 Island. I took them along with me when I swam back to the mainland afterwards."
"I'm so going to go there and get me some of that!" Neptune cried out as she whirled towards her friend, her eyes sparkling with excitement.
"NO!" IF shot her down. Neptune going to a nude beach had bad news spelled all over it.
"Don't worry, I'll bring spares back for you as well," Neptune tried to comfort IF.
"They'd throw you out pretty quickly," Falcom said as she eyed Neptune up and down, "you have some… growing to do, in more than one place."
"Oh don't worry about that!" Neptune said happily, "I'll just transform and they'll let me in easy peasy."
"You have more important things to do than abusing your powers to sneak into a nudist colony," IF retorted, her eyebrow twitching in annoyance.
"But just think about all the perverted readers we could win over to our side if we went there!" Neptune protested. "I just know they're dying to read about my sexy body laid out on a beach covered by nothing more than beams of light!" Neptune's hands traced curvy outlines in the air to accentuate her point.
IF grimaced, there was only one way to deal with Neptune in this situation, "alright, you win, but only if you manage to bring Planeptune's shares back up to full strength," IF relented. With Neptune's short attention span, by the time they managed to bring Neptune's shares back to full she would probably have forgotten about the island entirely. She'd have to make sure Falcom didn't mention the censorship beams again.
"I'll have Planeptune's shares up in no time! Just you wait and see!" Neptune said enthusiastically and pumped her fist into the air, "Come on slow pokes let's get back to town quick!" Neptune took off racing.
"You're really good at handling her," Falcom commented.
"Neptune can be a handful, that's for sure, but she's the predictable kind of chaos, that makes it easy to steer her," IF agreed as she looked over at her companion. She waved in the direction Neptune had gone, "Anyways we need to hurry after Neptune, she's bound to get into trouble before we get back to—"
"WHOA! Uh oh…" Neptune's voiced cried out from in the distance.
"See?"