I'll Make A Man Out Of You
Disclaimer: I don't own Fullmetal Alchemist, Square Enix, and its other respective owners own it. Idon't own the song 'I'll Make A Man Out Of You' from the movie 'Mulan,' they're owned by Disney.
Warning: May have Shounen-Ai because I like RoyEd and it just may sneak its way in there. Probably just flirting on Roy's part and flustered-ness on Ed's.
Edward twitched slightly in annoyance as he opened the door the training grounds, 'Tch, training! I don't need training! The rest probably do but I don't!' he thought as his jaw dropped when he saw everyone.
Havoc, Breda, Farman, Fury, and all Roy Mustang's male subordinates were standing at attention, without shirts on and already covered in a slight sheen of sweat.
The colonel turned to see Ed's slack-jawed appearance and smirked. That was all it took to get his jaw back up and him glaring at the Flame Alchemist, "What the hell is this?" the younger alchemist exclaimed.
Edward's outburst only caused smirk to get larger, "Why, Fullmetal, it's called a training field. Didn't the Furher tell you? I've been assigned to train you all on how to survive during war." Mustang stated smugly, "Better get in line, Fullmetal, or you'll fail the course."
Ed glared as Roy walked towards his other subordinates but halted slightly, looked back and added, "Oh and Fullmetal, you're little overdressed. Take off the trench coat and the jacket."
Edward faltered as a blush creeps up on his face as he grudgingly complied but he threw his coat at the Colonel who promptly dodged, "Off with the shirt too, Fullmetal." Roy added, earning himself another glare from Edward as he pulled off his shirt.
Ed grumbled to himself as he got in line with the other men as the beat of drums and music started to play. Edward looked around the training area curiously, searching for the music.
All he saw were tall wooden posts to climb, weights, practice swords and other supplies. There was even terrain and a river. For one second, he thought he saw a mass of dark hair on one of the posts but in the blink of an eye, it was gone.
Edward shook his head, "Let's get down to business –" Roy stated, at least Edward thought he did, "to defeat the Huns."
"Did they send me daughters when I asked for sons?" Roy sang as Edward's mouth hung agape as the insult sunk in. Edward was about to say something but all the other men started picking up swords so he had to follow orders.
"You're the saddest bunch I've ever met," Roy continued as some men fumbled with their swords and Edward glared at Mustang, about to clap his hands, "but you can bet before we're though."
The Colonel walked over to Fury and took his sword. He flipped around with precision and accuracy. He threw the sword back to Fury who barely caught it as Roy walked away, "Mister, I'll make a man out of you."
Roy led them to the forest, ordering them to go in. Edward was fuming by now, "Tranquil as a forest," Roy then snapped his fingers, sending flames Edward's way, "But on fire within."
Edward's eyes widened as he barely dodged the flames and then glared at the smirking Flame Alchemist, "Once you find your center, you are sure to win." Roy continued to sing as he snapped his finger sending more flames towards his men, most of whom, were barely escaping the flames, "You're a spineless, pale pathetic lot."
"And you haven't got a clue." Roy stated as men tried to escape the forest, "Somehow I'll make a man out of you."
"I'm never gonna catch my breath." Edward sang as he barely dodged the last flame because of the surprise of finding himself singing as well.
"Say goodbye to those who knew me." Havoc sang as he ran towards the river, the flames on his tail.
Farman followed behind him, but not as quickly and the flames scorched his pant, "Boy, was I a fool in school for cutting gym." He sang as he jumped into the water.
"This guy's got 'em scared to death." A voice sang from one of the wooden posts with amusement, who just happened to be Envy, grinning happily, as the men got scorched.
"Hope he doesn't see right through me." Fury sang as he jumped into the water, landing on Havoc.
"Now I really wish that I knew how to swim." Breda sang as he made a belly flop into the river.
"Be a man!" subordinates sang in the background.
"We must be swift as the coursing river." Roy and his men sang as the got swept away by river current.
"Be a man!"
"With all the force of a great typhoon." The men drag themselves onto shore only catching their breath as they went to climb the wooden posts.
"Be a man!"
Roy grinned as he snapped his finger again, "With all the strength of a raging fire." The men then went faster up the posts.
"Mysterious as the dark side of the moon." Edward got to the top the quickest and spotted Envy. His eyes narrowed as he jumped towards the homunculus.
"Time is racing toward us till the Huns arrive." Roy sang as Edward continued to pursue Envy, who was jumping the posts with ease.
"Heed my every order and you might survive." Roy continued as the other men finally made it to the top of their post only to be knocked over by Envy followed by Edward.
Roy watched Edward pursue Envy and shook his head, "You're unsuited for the rage of war." Roy then snapped his fingers, sending flames that made Edward fall to the ground by the Colonel, "So pack up, go home, you're through."
Edward growled at the as he got up and started to walk away from Mustang. Roy grabbed Edward's chin and forced him to face him, "How could I make a man out of you?" Roy asked seriously and as the words sunk in Edward's face flushed as he got out of the man's grip.
"Be a man!" Roy exclaimed to him as Edward tried to avoid him only to be pursued.
"We must be swift as the coursing river." The other men sang as Edward jumped into the river, still followed by Roy.
"Be a man!" Roy repeated as Edward growled and got to other side of the river.
"With all the force of a great typhoon."
"Be a man!" Roy repeated once more.
Roy then snapped his fingers, having made sure he kept his gloves dry, even in the river, "With all the strength of a raging fire." The fire blocked Edward's path, causing him to jump back, into Mustang's arms.
Roy grinned as Edward's eye widened with fear, "Mysterious as the dark side of the moon." Edward was about to vocally protest, but Roy's mouth had covered his, stopping all protests.
As soon as they parted, the men cheered and Envy spoke up, "Way to go, chibi-san!"
"AHHHHHHH!"
Edward's scream pierced through his dream as he abruptly sat up in his bed in a cold sweat. It took a few more moments before Edward's brain began functioning properly again.
"Alphonse! No more Disney movies on movie night!"
Glor: (giggles) I think that turned out a bit better then I thought I would. I just had to have Envy in there. Sorry for no Hawkeye but Icouldn't fit her in. Yup, fun RoyEd-ness. Anyone expect the ending? Read and Review.