Ziva's Guilty Pleasure, a ncis fanfic

Title: Ziva's Guilty Pleasure

Rating: K

Warnings: None, that I know of.

Character(s): Ziva and Tony

Inspiration: All the times that Ziva picks on Tony in the show.

Time frame: Season

Author's Notes: So this is the first NCIS fanfic that I actually like. Tell me what you think.

Disclaimer: I do not own the real NCIS, the TV show NCIS or any of the characters.

Ziva loved nithing more than picking on Tony. Because he was so particular about his appearance, it was easy- too easy really- to get to him.

"Tony, you're graying a bit on the sides," was met with him rushing to his desk and checking his hair color in a small mirror.

"Is that a wrinkle," was met with him ordering five different types of anti-wrinkling cream.

"Tony, your rating is going down a few points," was met with him rushing down to Abby's lab to have her rate his bum.

She saved her best for last though, knowing that it would hit him below the belt as the Americans say.

"Hey Tony," Ziva said leaning forward a little in her seat.

"What, Ziva!" he snapped. "What do you want? I'm busy. Very very busy."

"Never mind then," she said leaning back in her seat. "I just thought that you would want to know that your hair is starting to thin and you're getting a bit…flabbier."

Tony glared at her. "Is there anything else that you think I need to know, Zee-vah?"

"No, nothing at all. Oh except the fact that you might be shrinking some as well."

"Let me guess, this is another one of your 'okay, I'll just make something up to freak out Tony so he'll rush off to the closest mirror or female with an opinion and make a fool out of myself' things," he sighed.

"Yes," she nodded. "You caught me. That's exactly what I'm doing. I made up the whole flabby and shrinking thing. You have no need to worry." She glanced at her watch and stood up, grabbing a bag off her desk. "I really have to get this down to Abby."

"Ziva, wait! What about my hair! Is it really thinning?" he called rushing after her as she stepped into the elevator. He slipped his hand against the metal doors, holding them open. "You were kidding about the thinning thing, right?"

"Sorry, no time to talk really. Evidence to get tested," she smirked knocking his hand away. "But don't worry, I'll ask Abby if she can mix up some sort of thickening paste or something."

Officer David: 23, Agent DiNozzo: 4 she thought with a smirk as she saw his eye widen.

So, tell me what you think.

Spike.