Harry Potter: The Boy Who Babysits

~AlongCameASpider

Co-authored by la z boy

Chapter One

"It will do you good," had been what Aunt Petunia said after informing me of the new job I had been volunteered for. That was before she shoved me out the door with a note containing the address to the house I now slowly shuffled through. The woman did not say much other than "This is the living room," or "That's the pool". She wasn't that impressed with me, but was grateful she had at least found a temporary babysitter. Whether I had willingly accepted the job or not.

Begrudgingly, I followed her up the stairs, tripping on one and nearly falling on my face. The upstairs was kind of plain and consisted of mostly bedrooms. One of which held the children I would be watching for the next few days. And, unfortunately, this was an overnight baby sitting job, and it would be lasting about four days. The kids sat on the floor near a pile of toys, staring at us blankly. "Phillip and Felicia," the woman introduced the two kids, pulling me closer so they could see who I was.

"Hello," I said nervously, doing my best to smile.

They just continued to stare at me, not even blinking. Weird.

The woman, who was apparently too high and mighty to tell me her name, closed the door and pushed me toward the stairs. "They're not used to strangers," she explained, "I'm a stay at home mother, so they don't usually have babysitters." She rushed me back down to the kitchen where she went over a list of emergency phone numbers as her husband packed their bags into the car. The names could have filled a book: grandparents, friends, doctors, the hotel they'll be at, restaurants they intended to eat at. All the numbers were starting to blur and look the same.

Finally she disappeared up the steps, told her children goodbye, and then was out the front door. The sudden silence was almost a shock. I could have dropped a pin on the carpet and would have been able to hear it. Feeling awkward, I glanced around the living room. There was a large television against the wall closest to me, but it did not really interest me. Instead, I headed toward the computer in the corner of the room. I had seen Dudley with one several times. Usually, he would complain about it not working, but I had never been able to actually use one.

At first, it was very confusing. So many icons and pictures to click on, I wasn't sure what I was doing. But I quickly found what I had been most interested in: the internet. The number of websites was overwhelming. One site led me to another, some for games and some full of random information that no one would probably even need. After some number of clicking links, I discovered one page that was strangely interesting. It was full of stories people had written to go along with their favorite movies, books, and games.

Had I not been so engrossed in the things I was reading, I may have been more concerned about the loud crash that came from the kitchen. It sounded like a metal pan hitting the floor. "Keep it down, please," I muttered, but I was sure they wouldn't hear me. But as long as they were not completely destroying the house, a little noise wouldn't be all that bad.

"Perry, can you help me?" came...Felicia's shout from the kitchen.

I marked my place in the story I was reading and headed toward the kitchen doorway. I would have to remind her of my actual name.

But I didn't get the chance to correct her. I stepped through the doorway, but didn't see the kids. From both sides of the door came a wave of brown slop, followed by laughter, the sound of buckets hitting the floor, and fleeing footsteps. I stood there dumbstruck. The concoction was thick and coated me entirely. I could feel lumps sliding down my skin, along with small and dry bits of...something. And it was still warm, whatever it was.

I removed my glasses and attempted to clear them off. Cleaning them on my shirt was pointless, so I had to use water from the kitchen sink. Once I could see, I discovered that I had been showered by a mixture of beans and oatmeal. Most of it had gotten stuck in my hair and clothes, so there wasn't a lot to clean up off the floor, thankfully.

Once the kitchen was taken care of, I headed to the bathroom to take care of myself. I threw my dirty clothes into a bag and left a clean set on a shelf before stepping into the shower. I couldn't believe what the kids had done and I was quite angry about it. But they were young and the prank was harmless. I shut off the water and stepped out of the shower. I reached for my clothes. The shelf was empty.

"What the…?" I whispered as I checked the other shelves and floor, hoping my clothes fell. But there was no sign of them. The bag containing my bean and oatmeal covered clothes had vanished as well. But how? Clothes couldn't just get up and walk away. I checked the shelf again and noticed something I had missed the first time. In the corner was a set of pink children pajamas. With rainbows and unicorns on them.

I sighed, from anger and frustration, when I realized the kids had stolen my clothes and meant for me to wear the pajamas. Briefly I debated remaining nude while I searched for more clothing my size, but that didn't seem appropriate since there were young kids around. Not to mention that was a sure-fire way for me to get into serious trouble with Phillip and Felicia's parents if they found out. So, begrudgingly, I squeezed into the far-too-small garments. They were so tight, I was afraid to walk. One wrong movement, and I could end up naked anyway. These kids seemed almost as devious as Fred and George.

Ever so slowly, and carefully, I left the bathroom and made my way to the bedroom I was given. To say the trek was a difficult one was a bit of an understatement. My movements were as cautious as I could make them. But when I finally reached my assigned bedroom, to my great dismay I discovered that my bag had disappeared as well.

Just. Perfect.

After fighting the urge to hit my head against the wall, I wandered around the house looking for my clothes and the children, who had also mysteriously, and conveniently, disappeared. But I wasn't having much luck finding either. A wave of fear washed over me when I entered the kitchen and saw the back door open. As fast as I could, I ran outside. What if they ran away? What if one of them fell in the pool and drowned? What if-

The door slammed loudly behind me and familiar laughter faded into the depths of the house, thus putting an end to my worrying…at least about the safety of the kids. But now I had to figure out how I was getting back inside since I was sure knocking would be a wasted effort. Most of the windows were either too high or locked. I circled the house a couple of times, looking for a way in. On my last lap I finally noticed that a kitchen window was up just enough for me to get my hand under.

I walked through the dead shrubs that lined the outside of the house, the seat of the pants catching on the small branches and tearing, exposing a part of me I certainly didn't want exposed. It took quite a lot of effort to get the window pushed up far enough for me to squeeze under. And it took even more effort to pull myself up high enough to get through. I finally managed to perch on the windowsill, but quickly lost my balance and slipped into the sink still filled with water, the shirt catching on something in the process and ripping just like the pants. I struggled to adjust my position of the counter. My wet hands wouldn't stay where I set them, and I ended up sliding off the counter and onto the floor.

During all of this, the pajamas had been ripped beyond repair. The rest of the pants were in tatters and the shirt hung off me as if most of it had been devoured by a wild animal. My earlier reservation about not being naked in front of the kids now seemed a wasted effort since I barely had anything covering me. Well, at least the "important area" still had a barrier of clothing in front of it.

I'd have to forgo some of my payment in order to replace these pajamas, which I was not happy about. Slowly, I hauled myself up the stairs, making sure the kids weren't anywhere out in the open, and found that my bag and clothes had been placed back where I left them. After hurriedly changing into my own clothing and discarding Felicia's torn pajamas, I climbed into bed, dreading what tomorrow would bring.