Chapter 1 - BPOV
My best friend and I grew up together. He moved into the house that was two doors down from me and we became best friends that summer. We were only 7 years old. Of course as we grew older we grew closer. Then when I turned the tender age of 15, I looked at him one day as he had just helped me inside after we got soaked in a rain storm. In that moment I saw him; I mean I really saw him. That's when I fell in love with my best friend.
Unfortunately, that new found love was only one sided, well I mean I never told him how I felt because it was obvious that he was totally out of my league. He is unbelievably gorgeous. He has his mesmerizing green eyes, his perfectly chiseled body, and his soft to the touch bronze hair. To most people his hair is just a reddish color. No. Its bronze, trust me. Compared to me he's a Greek god. I'm…. how do I put this politely to myself… I'm, well…. average. Yeah, that's a nice way to put it. I've stopped my growth at the astonishing height of… prepare yourself…. 5'3". I know, I know. Oh, can't forget my average brown hair, average brown eyes, and the averagely dorky glasses that cover them. I know what you're thinking, why haven't we saw this girl in magazines yet. Yeah I've had some appealing offers from different agents, but you know no one has really captured me yet. Sigh…. It's nice to dream anyway. Moving on…
Let's go ahead a few years, shall we? It was 6 years after we graduated from high school. I had my Masters in Library Science, yes, yes laugh it up. I'm a librarian. Edward had his Master's in Education and History; he was a history teacher at a high school just outside of Seattle. Edward and I are both living in Seattle; don't get excited, we're not living together. He is living with his girlfriend of 2 years, Tanya. She's okay I guess, I may like her more if she wasn't with the man I'm head over heels in love with. She's beautiful in that supermodel kind of way, so she and Edward look great together. She has pretty blonde hair, blue eyes, and legs that are so long it makes Mount Everest wish it had that kind of height. They're a perfect match.
We were at the annual Cullen Fourth of July party which is always held at Edward's parents' house. Everyone was there including my dad Charlie. Both of Edward's siblings were there; Alice and her fiancé Jasper, Emmett and his girlfriend of nearly 3 years Rose. I loved of all of them, they were my family too. I grew up with most of them. Alice and Jasper were high school sweethearts and Emmett met Rose in college. The party was going great until…. Carlisle took the microphone. He got everyone's attention and said that Edward had an announcement to make. Edward made his way up to the mini stage and was pulling Tanya with him. This is where it happened…. my whole world just stopped. "Tanya and I are engaged!" Cue shattering of heart. Deep breaths, take deep breaths. You know he's going to come over to you and expect you to be happy, so suck it up Bella. I take one more deep breath, put on my best fake smile, and prepare to congratulate my best friend.
Right on cue, here he comes, with that smile plastered all over his face. Heading right for me, keep it together, he can't know. "Bella!" He swoops me up into his arms and hugs me tightly to him. He pulled back slightly to look me in the eyes.
"Congratulations Edward. You and Tanya will be very happy." And I will be miserable and alone. She's not only taking away the man I love, but also my best friend. Ouch! That hurts even worse.
"Guess what?" He asks as he sets me back on my feet.
"What?" I ask as I keep my smile locked in place.
"I've already decided who I want to ask to be me best man."
Of course his brother would be my first guess. "Really? Wow. So what guy have you decided on?" I asked as I looked around our group of friends.
He laughed. "None of them Bells! I want you to be me best man! Well, best woman." He corrected himself with a huge smile and nudged me with his elbow.
"Best woman?" Tanya asked as she walked up to me and Edward and put her arm around his waist. "Should I be worried here?"
Edward laughed. "I was meaning for Bella to be my best man you know. Well, to be honest, she is my best woman. Sorry hun, but you knew that when you first got involved with me." He squeezed her closer and nodded at me.
"I know." She smiled. "So Bella, what was your answer? Are you going to give Eddie away?" Ugh, I hate it when she calls him that.
"Well, I can't really say no to this guy when he's this happy." I said with my perfected fake enthusiasm.
"Yes! Thank you, thank you, thank you Bells!" He said as he lifted me up once again and twirled me around in his arms. I just laughed what else could I do? Besides cry.
Okay, let's hit the fast forward button once again to one year later. I had thought that since Edward was engaged to Tanya that our friendship would suffer. On the contrary, since I was the 'best woman' Edward and I were together almost 24/7 because of the silly wedding planning. Hey, don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining at all. If it was possible Edward and I had grown even closer. I had gone with him to pick out a tux and get fitted. I went with him to pick out the bands that would play, because there had to be two bands according to Tanya. "One for the ceremony and one for the reception." Seriously, can't one band do both? Where does it say in the handbook of weddings that there has to be two different bands? Then there was me trying to write the perfect 'best woman' speech, yeah I only have one line and the wedding is 2 months away. Here's what I got: Edward you're my best friend. Yep that's it, I know what you're thinking and you're right. I should totally write the speeches for the President. Kidding! Don't freak!
So I was at work and I get a call this morning from Edward asking if we could do lunch together he sounded weird. So we decided to do lunch at the park between his work and mine. We ate our lunch fairly quickly and then decided to walk around for a while.
"So, what's up? You sounded a little weird when you called me this morning."
"Just… I don't know… What do you think about me and Tanya? You really think it's a good thing?"
Uh, oh. He's already having doubts? This marriage won't even make it down the aisle then. "Yeah, sure. You guys are good together. Why? Don't you think it's a good thing?"
He hesitated and looked around for a minute. "I don't know. I've been a little confused here lately."
"What do you mean 'confused'? About what?"
"About the wedding. The engagement. Tanya. Tanya and me… together."
"I don't get it. What's changed?"
"There's someone else… I think."He whispered as he looked down at his feet.
"What do you mean you think? You either cheated or you didn't! Which is it?" I said a little too loudly. He gave me a look to remind me to keep my voice down.
"I haven't cheated." He stated simply.
"You just said…" He cut me off.
"That there was someone else. I didn't say we did anything."
"I… don't understand." I said searching for words.
He motioned for me to sit down with him on a nearby bench, I complied. He sighed and began. "Like I said, I haven't done anything… yet. I mean this woman doesn't even know I've developed feelings for her."
"What kind of feelings are we talking about here? Lust, entertainment, love?" I asked him.
He gave me a weird side glance, like he was afraid to tell me. "Love."
"Uh, oh." That's all I could muster because I was instantly in pain. Not only was he in love with Tanya, but now a second woman and neither one of them was me. I shook away my pain and put on my best 'best friend' face. "Okay start from the beginning. How and when did it happen?"
He blew out the gust of air he had been holding. "Well, it just sort of hit me. You know like when you got hit in the head with that hockey puck that one time. When we went to that hockey game a few years ago, remember?" I nodded, believe me I remember. "Well it hit me that I've been falling for her for a while."
"How? How did you fall in love with two women? I mean you still love Tanya right?"
"Yeah." He sighed. "I don't know Bells. I mean with Tanya it was easy because she made sense. I mean if you look at us it makes sense that we're together. We're a lot alike." He paused.
"With the other woman?" I prompted.
He ran his fingers through his hair as he got this goofy grin on his face. The boy was head over heels in love with this woman, it was written in that smile. "With her… it was so easy, just like falling. It makes sense and it's simple, but it's complicated. It's comfortable, but it's not. It's wrong, but it's… right."
"Wow. You're really in love with this girl." I said with a little giggle.
He let out a little laugh, nodded, and looked at me with raised eyebrows. "Hell, she gives me butterflies Bella."
I gave him a sad smile and patted his back. "Oh Edward! You are in quite a pickle."He nodded and laughed. "What are you going to do? Are you still going to marry Tanya?" Please say no! Please say no!
He dropped his head into his palms and shook his head. "I don't know Bells. I honestly don't know. That's why I'm here, I need advice. I need my best friend."He peeked over at me.
I gathered my thoughts and swallowed down my feelings. "Well, it seems to me that this new woman has really affected you."
He huffed. "I'll say."
"Okay so I guess the question is do you feel for Tanya what you feel for this other girl?"
"What do you mean? I told you I loved them both." He furrowed his eyebrows in confusion.
"I don't mean that. I'm talking about the butterflies." He still looked confused, I sighed. "Edward, it's only once in a lifetime that you find someone who has the ability to give you butterflies. Those butterflies tell you it's real. Do you get butterflies with Tanya?"
He stared at me intensely and almost longing, but I'm sure I'm just imagining that. He finally answered. "No, I don't get butterflies with her. Never have." He whispered the last two words.
"Well, then you have your answer. I mean you might want to make your feelings known to this other girl to make sure that it's mutual. You know before you throw everything away with Tanya." I shrugged.
"Yeah, you're probably right. I just… I'm scared to tell her, this other girl I mean. I'll be risking everything with her. We have this great thing now and I don't want to ruin it."
"Edward Cullen scared of a girl! Priceless!" I laughed.
"Yeah, yeah laugh it up Shorty!" He nudged me.
"Okay well I have to get going lunch is almost up. Are you going to be okay? If not, I can call in and say I'm not feeling well and we can just hang out."
He stared at me for a minute then turned his head and mumbled something that sounded a lot like "Damn butterflies." He let out a small laugh and then fully turned to me. "I'll be fine Bells. I just need to figure out my next move. Thanks for listening."
"Anytime, but you already know that. Okay keep me informed on what goes down." He nodded.
I stood up, smiled at him, and leaned down to kiss his cheek. "Love you."
He smiled back at me. "Love you too."
I walked away, but couldn't shake the way he said that he loved me. We've always told each other that, but the way he just said it was different. Hmmm… I'm sure I'm just hearing things now. I sigh and then once again just bury my feelings for my best friend.