Ack! I haven't updated ANYTHING in such a long time. I finally finished this :) I actually have like...8 or so other Kurofai fics I'm working on...I just haven't gotten around to any of them though. Anyway, I hope you enjoy this one! I actually enjoyed writing this, it's not in 1st person Tomoyo perspective though (which honestly I hate writing 1st person) but point is. These are all Tomoyo's thoughts, and eventual KuroFai :D
Disclaimer: I own absolutley nothing but the Plot ^^ All charcters belong to CLAMP
The day was beautiful. Amaterasu was having her lunch with Soma kneeling right beside her and Tomoyo on the other side of the Cherry Blossom Tree, enjoying her own food with Kurogane.
If only it would last.
She'd had a dream the night before, a dream of Kurogane, and what was to happen to him before he returned home with his future traveling companions. The thought weighed heavily on her mind but a curious notion came to mind the next moment.
"Kurogane, what would you do if you lost an arm?" she asked. Kurogane turned to her bewildered.
"What the hell?" he demanded. Tomoyo smiled.
"I asked, what would you do if you lost an arm?" she asked again. Kurogane huffed.
"Did you dream it?" he asked. Tomoyo smiled gently, he was always so observant. But a little white lie is necessary when discussing matters of the future.
"No, just hypothetical." she replied. Kurogane studied her before he sighed.
"If it couldn't be helped then I would adapt. I would get stronger and then go after the bastard that lopped it off." he replied. Tomoyo sighed disappointed. He was like a broken record with the 'getting stronger' line but what saddened her was that he never spoke of protecting anyone anymore. She looked forward to when she'd see him off on his journey and patiently await his return, and what kind of person he'd be when he'd come back.
"But what if you were the one who cut it off?" she asked, pushing the question deeper. The warrior spun on her.
"Why the hell would I do that!" he exclaimed. She shrugged.
"Say you were trying to save someone and you had no choice." she said. He gritted his teeth.
"I would find a way around it. There's no way I'd cut off my own arm." he said blatantly.
"What if I asked you to?" she sneered, covering her mouth with her sleeve. He spun on her again, appalled.
"WHY THE HELL SHOULD I! I wouldn't do it even if you asked!" he shouted, alerting Soma.
"Kurogane!" she scolded. Tomoyo laughed and put her hand up, signaling for Soma to relax. The female ninja did as she was ordered and sat back down beside Amaterasu. Tomoyo turned back to Kurogane.
"Well…if you wouldn't do it for me. Who would you do it for?" she asked, now curious. The warrior clenched his jaw, resisting the urge to shout at her.
"No one. I wouldn't allow myself to get that close with anyone else. I'm here to serve you and kill those who threaten this castle. That would be impossible if such a distraction existed." he said, remembering to remain calm and speak more respectfully, the only reason being so Soma wouldn't jump at his throat.
"This is hypothetical Kurogane. Just imagine. If you had a lover that you wanted to protect, and the only way to do that was to cut off your arm. How do you think you'd feel?" she pressed. Kurogane blushed slightly, uncomfortable of where this conversation was going. Sure he was loyal to his princess, but did she really have the authority to inquire about his sex life?
Unfortunately she had the authority over him for anything.
"I don't plan to take on a lover. I'd like to avoid that if possible and besides, I don't see how losing a limb for them would solve anything." he said stubbornly. Tomoyo looked at him, wondering. She then smiled lightly and stood up. Kurogane stood too.
"It's alright Kurogane. I'm just going to go to the shrine to pray for a while." she said, holding up her hand to stop him from following her.
"Then let me stand outside the door." he requested. She sighed. She could understand that ever since his mother's death, he'd been a little…cautious when it came to shrines. Tomoyo shook her head.
"Not this time. There are already 2 sentries placed beside the door. You don't need to come." she said lightly yet firmly. Kurogane ignored her.
"Those idiots don't take their job seriously! Princess…"
"Kurogane," Tomoyo said seriously "This isn't a request, it's an order. Please, patrol the grounds as you wish, just try to avoid unnecessary death if the situation approaches." she said, authority laced through her words.
A moment of silence
"Tch. Fine" he said before he stormed off.
Tomoyo stood where she was until his padded footsteps faded away. She chuckled. She thought about condoning him as a ninja for letting his footsteps be heard at all. As she walked toward the shrine she looked out at the setting sun. Tonight was the night. She had to pray while Kurogane was out of earshot…because it was him she was praying for.
The sentries at the door, stood attention to her approach. She smiled gently at them and let herself in. Whilst she prayed, she dreamt of the assassins on the roof, Kurogane standing over their bloody bodies, sneering at their weakness. She frowned.
When she was back in the temple she heard Kurogane's laugh as the last of the assassins was killed. She sighed.
'Once again you didn't do what I asked, did you… Kurogane?'
"Princess?" he asked aloud. Kurogane ran across the roofs of Shirasagi castle to the temple where he knew his princess would be. She always returned to the temple when she finished praying.
"I asked you to avoid unnecessary death. Weren't those my words?" Tomoyo admonished. Kurogane glared.
"It's my duty to cut down those that attack you Princess Tomoyo!" he shouted. Tomoyo felt she knew what was coming next "Look, All I want is to become stronger Princess, and if my enemy lives or dies in the process, it's not my concern." he sneered.
There it was. The warped truth. His flawed idea of true strength. What happened to him? His parents death was the catalyst, but when had he lost the motivation to protect someone altogether? She didn't know. She didn't know how he had become so blind in his quest for strength.
So as she sent him off to the witch, she placed a curse upon him to avoid unnecessary death. His strength will weaken with every person he kills. Perhaps then…he will be able to remember the true meaning of strength.
As Kurogane disappeared from sight, she recalled their earlier conversation. She chuckled, thinking about what he said then and now. How long will it take? A month? Several months? A year? How long will it take for him to re-learn the meaning behind his original ideals?
"Not too long I hope." Tomoyo said aloud. Soma perked her ears.
"Princess?" she asked. Tomoyo laughed.
"It's nothing. I just can't wait to see how this turns out." she said happily. If only he'd return whole, she added as an after thought, remembering her dream.
She proceeded back to the shrine to pray again. She had faith in his abilities, yet, he was still her childhood friend. Almost a brother. She couldn't help but worry.
"Where is this!" he asked, recognizing the room he was in.
"You're in the country of Japan." Tomoyo spoke, smiling gently.
"Princess Tomoyo?" he asked. She smiled and almost wanted to laugh. She'd been following through their journey in her dreams. He certainly had come across many look alikes of her. She nodded.
"Welcome back, Kurogane." she said.
As soon as he woke up she could see…he had changed so much in so little time. A little under a year had passed and he seemed, so much calmer. If this were the old Kurogane, he would've angrily leapt out of bed, ready to fight. Now he was wiser, more mature in so many ways yet in a way he was still same old same old. It made her happy to see that he had finally learned, and remembered…the reason why he fought.
Glancing once at his left shoulder which lacked a limb, she smiled and stood.
"You can come in now." she announced. She watched as Kurogane's face changed from curiosity to surprise. Both were emotions she had never seen so plainly on his face, at least not in recent years. She stepped backwards and studied the man that had stolen her ninja's heart.
"Hey!" Kurogane shouted.
Even Tomoyo was surprised at the following blow. She watched in mild surprise as Fai punched Kurogane and continued to address him with a ridiculous name. She would've expected a violent response from the limb lacking ninja but instead…he merely smiled and threatened the magician.
She stepped out noisily, attracting Kurogane's attention she winked and smiled. If only she could've stayed to see the blush on his face. He really had changed, infinitely so.
The next morning she came down to Kurogane's chambers to show them, or more specifically Fai, to where Sakura and Syaoran were. Mokona was with her, perched happily on her shoulder.
She was about to announce her presence when…
"BASTARD!"
"Hyuu! Kuro-sama's angry!" Fai's voice sounded behind the paper door.
"GET BACK HERE!" Kurogane shouted. Mokona giggled. Tomoyo turned her attention to the little creature.
"This happens often, doesn't it?" she assumed. She had seen several instances such as this during their journey, but not enough times to think it was a daily occurrence.
"Fai's being silly again and Kurogane's mad mad mad again." Mokona chirped "Just like before." it added. It then occurred to her that their little group had been through much more than just a couple unfriendly dimensions. She had almost forgotten that Kurogane hadn't changed as easily as it appeared. He had been through many hardships as well.
She sighed.
"Come in." Kurogane said. It startled her, but she smiled. Of course he knew she was outside. She could never sneak up on him even as children. She pushed the door aside to see, Kurogane behind Fai, tying his obi while the smaller man held his arms out. He turned and smiled.
"Hello Princess Tomoyo-chan." she grinned. Kurogane finished tying the obi with one swift, harsher than necessary, tug. Fai of course noticed.
"Ah! Kuro-tan that's too tight. Are you mad at me for being friends with princess Tomoyo?" he smirked. Tomoyo laughed as well.
"That's right. Be careful Kurogane, I might steal him from you." she joked. All present took pleasure in Kurogane's reddened face and blustered reaction.
"Knock it off! Both of you!" he flustered. Fai chuckled but his cheeks too were slightly colored. As Mokona continued to tease, it didn't pass Tomoyo's eye that Fai's furisode was more wrinkled than it had been when she gave it to him. Both his and Kurogane's hair were also slightly more ruffled. She smiled again.
"Kurogane, Fai-san. I'd like to show you to the Cherry Blossom Tree. Syaoran-kun is there waiting for you." she said. Both males nodded and followed her out the door. Seeing this opportunity to tease Kurogane in front of Fai, Tomoyo couldn't pass this up.
"Kurogane, do you remember the conversation we had before I sent you off? The one we had by the tree?" she asked innocently. Fai turned his attention to Kurogane, curious.
At first he didn't remember, however his face flushed with realization and he glared.
"No." he said stubbornly. Tomoyo smiled deviously.
"Then maybe I should remind you of it then." she said. She was about to continue when Kurogane interceded.
"Alright I remember! You were right I was wrong!" he said defiantly, wanting to end the conversation. Tomoyo chuckled. Fai furrowed his brow, curiosity at it's peak.
"What was Kuro-tan wrong about?" he asked innocently. Kurogane sent a glare his way, his face still slightly flushed. No way he could avoid the topic now. Tomoyo covered her mouth with her sleeve and giggled. Mokona leaned forward as well, eager to know.
"Before I sent Kurogane on his journey, I had a dream of what was to happen in Celes," she began. Fai stiffened, thinking it was something serious he shouldn't have asked about.
Tomoyo was surprised Kurogane didn't say something like 'So you DID know it was going to happen!' It was like their conversation after he woke up. She was sure he'd say something about her not telling him about any of her visions sooner. He'd definitely grown on his journey. She continued her explanation.
"I then asked him the next day, hypothetically speaking, what would happen if he cut off his arm?" she said. Fai smirked in Kurogane's direction.
"And what did Kuro-sama answer?" he asked. The ninja avoided eye contact.
"He said he would never do that, not even if I asked him to." the princess replied. Fai's cheeks flushed. Not even for Tomoyo? He snuck a glance at Kurogane who was looking in his direction. When they made eye contact he quickly looked away.
"Quit looking at me like that! I already said I was wrong." he grunted, irritated at being so embarrassed. Fai smiled, his cheeks still slightly pink.
"Awe! Kurogane's embarrassed!" Mokona teased. Fai laughed as Kurogane grabbed for the manjuu and threatened it.
"He also said he'd never take on a lover. Another Lie." Tomoyo added. Kurogane looked up and glared furiously at her while Fai's face erupted in a bright red color.
"TOMOYO!" he shouted. Tomoyo giggled. Mokona joined in the giggles as well and perched itself back on her shoulder. She turned a corner leading Fai and Kurogane to a bridge that led to the Cherry Blossom Tree in turn. Mokona bounded from her shoulder to greet Syaoran.
Fai and Kurogane exchanged one quick glace before both their faces returned to normal. Tomoyo sensed them behind her and smiled kindly. She was glad that not everything she saw ended with pain.
At least for now, she could watch her childhood friend relax with his lover beside him, and a new mechanical arm in place.
When the air shifted, and Seishiro stepped out of the bulge from the sky, she felt irritated. It seemed peace was never lengthy for the travelers. Even though she gave up her dream-seer abilities, this once, just this once, she hoped to have good dreams when she went to sleep.
I live off reviews like Fai lives off Kurogane's blood!