Prologue: The Baffled Brains Meet's A Beautiful Brawn

Since there was no obvious danger on this mission Braniac 5 would not be calling on his fellow legionnaires for back up. Actually, the lone Coluan wouldn't be calling on anyone for anything, at least for a while. He had left the Legion of Superheroes to cope with his new found humanity. Flesh and emotions were such a culture shock that the "former robot" (something no one had ever expected to say for all the vast grandeur of the wide universe) felt it would be best to cope with them alone. Foolish in hindsight, but that too was another aspect of being "human". The journey of solitude eventually led him outside the safety of the United Planets into the vast space beyond. It was in this remote and seemingly untouched realm with only chirping life-support systems for company that a faint, almost oblique, distress call reached the lone ship's sensors. Intrigued, Braniac 5 reset his coordinates for the pursuit.

Although Braniac 5's twelfth level intellect could process large amounts of data, there were three very small and very specific things about the faint distress signal that had peaked his interest. The first thing that caught his attention was the simplicity of it. The pattern wasn't like any of the known intergalactic distress codes, but at the same time the pattern was too regular to be merely dismissed as space noise. If that were the case then the remaining question was how did he know it was a distress signal? Simply put his gut (some else he would have to get used to) told him so. The second irregularity was the pattern itself. Based on his vast knowledge of technologies and customs of the assorted species of the galaxy, Brainiac 5 had come to a startling conclusion. The signal pattern, as simple as it was, most closely resembled a very old and at one time a very well-known terrestrial code. To find a reminder of Earth so far out in what was considered by most to be the "badlands" of space was (to say the least) unexpected. Lastly the source of the signal seemed to come from an ice covered planet that, as far as anyone knew, was uninhabited. The planet was so dull and remote it hadn't even received a proper name. The most anyone ever made of it was a footnote somewhere which basically said, "there was ice. Lots and lots of ice."

The solo adventurer assumed that a small transport ship or explorer craft had gotten lost or damaged and the ice ball was the closest thing to an emergency landing. With such an archaic distress call he didn't expect to find anyone or anything still alive at the crash site. This would merely serve as a temporary diversion from the other things he's had on his mind. After Brainiac 5 bundled up (another human inconvenience) and stepped out on to the frozen landscape he easily tracked down the distress signal to its source. The scrap pile of a beacon seemed to support his "lost explorers" theory. There was just one problem, however. With the bone chilling wind moaning in his ears Braniac 5 tuned his scanners to look for life signs just to be thorough and met with a big shock.

"What the-?" He gasped as the needle on the screening device danced up and down erratically. Even if they were there he couldn't detect any life forms because a huge energy surge was creating interference. Something, a very big something, was a mere miles beneath the ice like a looming shadow.

"Whatever it is, it can't be…good." Braniac 5 stopped himself from speaking further. Thinking out loud had become a rather unfortunate habit especially since there wasn't anyone to listen. A shuffling sound at his back alerted Braniac 5 to a stranger's approach, but the creature proved to be too slow to deliver the message. The ice beneath them both cracked in shock at the weight of life. Caught off guard Brainiac 5 and the creature fell though the ice into the hidden caves below.

It wasn't the fall that had knocked him unconscious. It was the alien creature's landing that had knocked the wind out of him. Taking a few moments to curse the integrity of his own inventions (that would be tweaked again at a more convenient time) Brainiac 5 slowly sat up and concluded that he was undamaged for the time being. The natural ice cavern was dark and uninteresting. Without the light of the surface as a marker Brainiac 5 theorized that navigating the tunnels was not for amateurs. Getting lost would be the only option. The alien that had fallen with him, however, was now nowhere to be seen and apparently had disappeared into one of the passages.

"So much for uninhabited," He muttered and prepared to fly back up out of the hole, but something was off. His flight ring, his flight ring appeared to be malfunctioning. As is mind quickly ran through all the possibilities of why that was impossible and what might be causing the interference his concentration was broken by a hushed whisper bouncing off the cavern walls.

"…pusssss…pusssss…pussssss…"

"W-who's there?" Braniac 5 backed up against the cold wall and began fiddling with his flight ring again. "I'm not here to hurt you… but if you have the intent of harming me I'm telling you now you'll regret it." The cavern was too dark for him to see more than a few feet with the aid of his portable emergency lights. Slowly small (most thankfully mere feet tall small) figures crept forward as is shy of the light. Their garments were simple robes that hid their bodies completely away from the cold.

The voices tried again, "…us…us… help… us… help… us… help us."

"Huh?"

At last the leader of the small band walked forward. The tiny figure's feet made a slapping sound as the creature walked forward. Once the figure was close enough to properly look Braniac 5 in the navel the robed leader lowered her hood to reveal a green, slimy, frog head. The creature looked up at Braniac 5 with her yellow eyes and with a low croak she forced out the words.

"Please," She said. "Please, help us."

Naturally the strings of a true hero's heart are far from being made out of lead. Brainiac 5 stood up quickly startling the amphibian natives. He asked them boldly as any hero would, "What do you need?"

"Help us," The frog chief said again. "Help us help her."

"Help who?" Braniac 5 asked now just a little confused. Whatever was messing with his ring's flight capabilities was also messing with the translation program apparently. He gave the device a few quick taps hoping to clarify once and for all the burning question on his mind and that was, "Just what is going on here?"

"Help us help her who helped us." The frog chief said more firmly.

"Okaaaay." Braniac 5 still wasn't sure if he had heard correctly. At last with a final "kick" as it were to the problem, the language barrier was broken. The frog people made like the Red Sea so their leader and now "guest" could walk past.

"Come inside." The frog chief suggested. "I will tell you our story on the way."

"As you might have guessed from our physical appearance and the appearance of this place," The frog chief said as they walked along. "This planet was not our original home." Braniac simply nodded. He had indeed come to that realization once he saw the "Ramiki" people. Although they looked like they could control their internal body temperature to a certain extent, Braniac 5 suspected that the Ramiki would be much more at home in a dense rainforest on some humid bug infested planet.

Brainiac 5 analyzed the various story bits carefully. "This planet isn't an ideal environment at all." He said at last drawing upon his mental map of the stars. The Ramiki were intelligent, but primitive. There was no way for them to have interplanetary travel technology. The Bad Lands were lawless and brutal. This race wouldn't have stood a chance in conflict. The only reason they were safe now was probably because nobody knew they were there. Looking around one question kept popping into his mind. If the Ramiki didn't bring themselves to the ice ball, then what did? What sort of idiot would dump an amphibian race into what was basically a freezer? Unless, of course, the circumstances were very dire at the time. "Surely you could have picked a better place than this." He mumbled also not fond of the chill that was sneaking through what was supposed to be an impermeable transuit.

"One would think so, but this one suits all our basic needs." The frog chief said not ungratefully. "The surface it doesn't look like much, but the air is breathable and there is plenty of eatable aquatic life below." The fog looked down at the ice below their feet. "Our talented young people are developing ways of harnessing the great underwater volcano for heat and energy. Give us a few generations and this planet will be paradise." The frog chief explained, "We were brought here by our great hero, the stranger from afar."

"If that's the case," Brainiac 5 asked. "Why did you send out a distress signal?"

"Because she's the one who needs help now." The frog chief replied solemnly.

When the frog chief said the word "she" they turned the corner into a brightly lit cavern with an underground lake at the very center. At the center of the lake stood a pillar of ice stretching from the ceiling into the dark waters below. In the clear pillar's core two figures were trapped, frozen in mid battle. A giant man with dark orange skin that greatly reminded Braniac 5 of the Legion's old foe Imperiex was locked in contest with a masked human girl. The source of the nearly blinding light was the girl's wrists.

"Amazing," Brainiac 5 said in awe. After adjusting his gauges to counter the immense powers the girl was emitting he came to a firm conclusion. "They're still alive."

"Both come from worlds far away that we couldn't even imagine." The chief frog explained shielding her eyes from the magnificent glare of the ice locked battle. The woman had chased the vile villain from realms unknown. The Ramiki and their home planet had gotten caught in the crossfire. The woman saved them by bringing the Ramiki to the frozen planet when their home destroyed. In a last ditch effort to stop the great and terrible advisory the young woman sacrificed herself to trap both her and her opponent. It was unknown how long the seal would last, but the girl was determined to hold it for as long as she could.

"Please," The frog chief pleaded. "Help her and take her home." The frog's expression turned to sorrow and regret. "I could sense that she was still just a child, but she has done so much for us. Our current technology is too primitive, but perhaps you can help her."

"I'll do my best." Braniac 5 said, but even he had his doubts.

-–several scans later—-

"It's no use." Brainiac 5 said with a heavy sigh. "I can't free one without freeing the other." He turned back at the frog chief. Flexing powers of immense patience the frog woman had spent the entire time meditating.

Unflinching the frog woman replied, "Keep trying."

Brainiac 5 looked over the imposing figure of Xezh Chof again unable to shake the uneasiness that was haunting his nerves. "How strong did you say this guy was?"

"That is irrelevant," The frog woman said still keeping her meditative from.

"Seems pretty relevant to me," Brainiac 5 muttered while looking over his readings again.

"Sooner or later the hero's powers will fail." The frog chief replied nonchalantly. "At that time the opponent will still be strong. The better option would be to buy time so that the hero can recover and gather strength." Brainiac 5 frowned. He hated being out logic'd, especially by an amphibian.

-Five failed rescue plans later-

"We clearly have the wrong approach." Brainiac 5 sighed exhausted.

"Might I suggest an alternative solution?" A tiny frog child popped out from nowhere.

"This isn't as simple as building a backup generator, Mali." The frog chief corrected the child.

"Just hear me out," He replied with a bob of his head. It was then and there that the Ramiki's youngest and most talented engineer came up with the final solution. The barrier of ice was being held by the hero. In order to release her (and unfortunately her foe with her) they would have to inhibit her power. "Hold it back, like a dam, and then hope it'll release with that extra oomph."

"There are far too many variables in that scenario for my tastes." Brainiac protested. "What powers does she have and just how do plan to limit them?"

"She didn't speak our language nor did she have a device to translate like you," Mali explained. Unlike the older Ramiki there were several flaws in his voice that were possibly a sign that he was the Ramiki equivalent of a preteen. Thus his perspective on the "stranger from afar" was different. He held a greater intuitive curiosity for the odd creature. "When we sang the Rami prayer her golden aura wavered. She found it to be…calming."

"Very well," The frog chief said ignoring Brainiac 5's protests.

Since his side trip on the road to discovering his humanity had taken a turn towards dangerous Brainiac 5 wanted to be a prepared as possible. Even the best of odds didn't favor them. Their only hope was the unknown element, the girl.

The Ramiki sang their prayer. Its melody bounced off the ice and filled the cavern like a great symphony. It was very soothing. Even Brainiac 5 had to admit that. The light of the girl also shrank and, as if he was waiting for that chance, the girl's advisory opened his eyes. The cavern trembled as the man's muscled tensed. Several heart pounding moments later he effortlessly broke free of the pillar. The girl, however, remained motionless on the island of ice. Xezh Chof was free. The frog people screamed. Brainiac 5 fired his weapons hoping to stun the giant, but it was futile.

"NO!" The terrified screams of the frogs was enough to wake the girl. Clearly the woman was gearing up for ultra burst of power making everyone duck for cover.

"I think not." Rather than face the girl's wrath Xezh Chof powered up a thousand year old device. Brainiac 5 blinked in surpise as a boom tube formed. "You've done well, little girl." The villain taunted. "But I'll make sure the whole universe knows and fears the name 'Pandemonium'!"

"Not this time!" The girls stored blast was reaching critical. The resulting backlash would be dangerous for even her. Before Brainiac 5 could interviene the girl shouted at the top of her lungs, "Even if it kills me I'll send you to-"

The golden blast of energy and the boom tube collided into a blast that even Hollywood would envy. It wasn't until several minutes afterwards that the girl regained consciousness. She heard the Ramiki chanting a prayer for her. It was kind and heartfelt. The girl knew that the Ramiki were a good people even if she couldn't speak their language. What surprised the girl the most when she opened her eyes was the blond boy with green skin.

"Huh?" She tried to sit up, but it took several tries.

"Are you okay?" Brainiac 5 asked. The blast had roasted all his equipment. For a full medical examination they would have to return to his ship. That is, if even that wasn't totaled inadvertently in the blast as well.

"Yeah, I think so." She finally managed to sit up properly. "At least I'm not dead."

"Indeed." Brainiac 5 nodded. That was the one diagnosis they could all agree on. "Not yet."

"Figured as much." The girl muttered and rubbed her throbbing skull. "I didn't think hell would have any pretty boys and just who the hell are you?"

Brainiac 5 was stunned by several observations. He did his best to remain calm and try to think logically about this…unusual meeting. "I'm Braniac 5, and if I'm not mistaken you…" He faltered. "I mean you're…" Even someone of his intelligence would be flabbergasted by something so unlikely. "But you…" He tried again to speak up and failed. It was simply impossible. The girl by now was surrounded by several grateful and relieved Ramiki. She gave "hugs" (which in the Ramiki culture was a gesture of matching the first two fingers and thumb to the other person's) all around. It was at that stuttering moment that the girl realized that while she couldn't speak with the Ramiki, she could understand the green man perfectly.

"I'm what?" She crossed her arms and waited for a point.

Finally Brainiac 5 managed to spit out, "You're speaking an Earth dialect!" Having just heard another variation of it recently (aka Superman) Brainiac was royally stunned.

"Makes sense considering that's where I'm from." The girl didn't seem too alarmed considering she was on an alien planet light-years and centuries away from where she was supposed to be.

"The dialect you're using is from centuries ago." Brainiac 5 told her. "You've traveled forward in time."

This made the girl pause in disbelief. "You're kidding," She accused.

"So either you're lying about where you're from," It was Brainiac 5's turn to be accusatory. "Or you unwittingly transported yourself to the 31st century."

At hearing that last bit the girl looked absolutely crest fallen. "…Are those my only two options?" She asked weakly.

"Do you have anything to prove your story?"

The girl thought for a moment, "I think I have half a pack of mint gum and thirty-eight cents left in my pocket."

"Welcome to the 31st century."