Trespasser (Prologue)
Yup, another Solavellan fic. Taking this one in a different dicrection than my previous story, with some similarities I guess. Prologue is from my previous fic, covering and embellishing events in Trespasser. Enjoy!
Valla raced through the Crossroads with Blackwall, Iron Bull, and Cole close behind. They had gone through so many eluvians Valla could no longer tell where in the Crossroads they were. The shattered elven towers and ancient paintings were beginning to blur together, and having finished fighting off another wave of hostile Qunari, navigation was the furthest thing from their minds. Growing weary, their pace began to slow as they trudged up another set of stairs.
"Why did those Qunari attack the Inquisition on sight?" Valla asked.
"Hmm." Iron Bull scratched his chin, "My people never act without orders. A commander in the Qun must have given them."
Blackwall looked alarmed, "Are you saying the entire Qunari nation wants us dead?"
"Who knows?" Iron Bull shrugged, "It's times like this I wish I hadn't burned all my contacts in the Ben-Hassrath."
"Well then," Valla said jokingly, "Who wants to tell Josephine, Leliana, and Cullen that we are probably at war with the Qunari now? Anyone?" she groaned, "They are going to kill me."
Iron Bull let out a frustrated grunt. "This doesn't make any sense! My people have no reason to go to war with us! They have left the South alone for so long and things are finally getting back to normal. Why now?"
"I take it going to war against your countrymen is the last thing you want to do." Blackwall inquired.
"It would not end well for anyone." Bull's voice filled with dread, "Believe me."
A mural on the tower wall caught Valla's attention. In the style of the ancient elves, it depicted an man wearing a wolfskin, the beast's head covering his face. With an outstretched hand, the man appeared to be removing the vallaslin from freed elves. She could not take her eyes from it.
"That's Fen'Harel...removing Dalish vallaslin?" Without thinking Valla raised her hand, tracing the invisible lines where her own markings once were. Her voice was solemn, "Solas said they were used to mark slaves."
"Ar lasa mala revas." Cole said quietly, "You are free."
The phrase stung in Valla's ears. She did not need to be reminded of the last time she heard those words. "Cole, please don't-"
His gaze remained fixed on Valla. Though she was accustomed to Cole's curious manner of speaking, his face was more telling, as if he knew something he could not admit.
"You are so beautiful."
Valla's eyes widened as the thought dawned on her. She turned back to the painting, focusing on the image of Fen'Harel, trying desperately to see through his mask. If everything she had been taught about her people's history was wrong... "It couldn't be." her voice barely a whisper. A knot twisted in her stomach as Leliana's final report on Solas came to mind. Whoever Solas truly is, wherever he came from, he has deceived us from the very start. She could not bring herself to believe it.
"Cole," Valla said more clearly, "Do you think he's-"
"A slow arrow breaks in the sad wolf's jaws." Cole replied, "He wants to give wisdom, not orders."
Valla cried out as the Anchor flared on her hand, jolting her out of her thoughts. The flares becoming more frequent, the eerie light growing steadily up her arm each time.
"That looked painful." Blackwall said, worry written on his face. "Are you alright?"
"I'm fine." Valla said through gritted teeth. "Let's keep moving." None of this would matter if the Anchor were allowed to grow unchecked.
Moving on, Valla tried to ignore the concerned glances of her friends. With a potential war against the Qun looming, along with threats working from within the Inquisition and the Anchor growing ever more unstable, she could hardly blame them for worrying. And now she was plagued with only more questions. She could not get the image of Fen'Harel out of her mind. She couldn't bring herself to believe that it was something other than coincidence. The Dread Wolf was not the malevolent trickster she had been taught. If he was truly the liberator of the elven people, it would change everything.
Solas strode through the shattered library of Vir Dirthara. Once a sanctuary for any who sought wisdom, it pained him to see it in its current state. He took a moment to look upon the ancient books and scrolls still resting on the shelves. "So much knowledge lost." he muttered. There was so much he could restore. The chance to rewrite history, to replace the false and biased accounts of the humans with fact, to remove the shadowed fables and half-truths behind Dalish legend. To reveal their true heritage, Solas thought, that alone would be worth the reshaping of the world.
He winced as he felt a surge of magical energy radiate through the library. Though it was only for an instant its effects lingered, a silent echo resonating through the broken halls. Solas knew there was only one source capable of creating such power. His heart grew heavy. He could only imagine how much pain the Anchor was causing Valla. The fact its power could be felt this far into the Crossroads troubled him greatly. He knew it was only a matter of time before it would consume her, only a matter of time before she found him. How could he explain that this had always been her fate, that only he could have bore the Mark and lived? She deserved so much better, so much more than he had to give.
But he could not let his concern for Valla distract from his task. The Qunari were close on his heels, relentless in their hunt for the so-called agent of Fen'Harel. Solas doubted they would accept the far simpler truth of who they were truly hunting, if they knew.
With a casual wave of his hand a group of spirits appeared before him. Once the guardians of this place, Solas required their services once more.
"Atish'all vallem." the spirit said. Shimmering in a haze of violet light, it shouldered it's weapon. "Fen'Harel elethadra. Nuvenas mana helanin, dirth bellesa ma."
Solas couldn't help but smile. Even after a millenia, the spirit still asked for the Dread Wolf's passphrase. "Ar-melana dirthaveren." Solas replied, "Revas vir-anaris."
The spirit nodded in approval. "Amae lethellas."
"These halls are in need of their guardians once more," Solas said, "Let none pass."
Solas quickly moved on, knowing the Qunari would not allow him to take pause for long. Putting a halt to their plans remained his priority. The thought of the Qun spreading into southern Thedas sickened him. Though Solas knew their doom would come in time, they deserved better than a life devoid of free will. It was the least he could do for the people of this world gone wrong. As he began to plan his next move, he found his thoughts straying, returning to her. It had been two years since he had last seen her face, yet he could recall it so clearly. He had done his best to commit it to memory before the inevitable day he had to leave Valla behind. He would never forget how she would brighten at the discovery of some ancient mystery, the gentle melody of her laughter, how the absence of her vallaslin made her eyes shine brighter...
Solas cursed at himself. This was the reason he kept his distance, why he dared not even search for her in the Fade. Even the mere memory of her could cause his plans to unravel. He had vainly hoped that the passage of time would cause her to fade from his thoughts, but to no avail. Solas wondered if Valla knew how much she still held sway over his heart, that if he had not left her when he did, he would have exchanged her betrayal for his own. He did not know which was worse. When Valla eventually found him, would he be able to at last tell her the truth? Would she believe him?
More importantly, would it matter?
(These translations were hard to find and somewhat varied. This was the best I could come up with.)
Atish'all vallem. Fen'Harel elethadra. Nuvenas mana helanin, dirth bellesa ma.
(Some sort of greeting) If you want help/if you are here to help, say your password."
Ar-melana dirthaveren. Revas vir-anaris.
I come in peace to the unwaking realm. I enter time for the promise. There is freedom along the path of years.
Amae lethellas.
Kinsman/Clansman
"...struck at the tower. A great sizzling bolt out of a blue sky. Spirits emerged from a statue of a wolf, as if the lightning woke them, and they appeared to be looking for someone. The only word I understood was "Fen'Harel." They did not see me, but beware, they attack any guards who..."
"The walls of blue flame were created by the agent of Fen'Harel as he ran through this place bringing chaos and destruction. Do not light fires from them. Do not go near them. Fen'Harel's mage-servant made them to hamper us, and they bring only death."
Having safely returned to the Winter Palace, Valla stood over a slew of papers spread across a long table. Messages she salvaged from dead Qunari, as well as reports from her own agents. It was all troubling. Gatlock powder found smuggled into the palace by elven servants, her own spy network infiltrated by unknown assailants as well as the Qunari, who accused them of serving Fen'Harel. And still the Exalted Council loomed like an oncoming storm. Ferelden would see the Inquisition dismantled entirely, while Orlais would see them leashed for their own gains. Valla could feel her position slipping out from under her as she tried desperately to make sense of the situation. Though preventing another war and preserving the Inquisition were the more significant issues, Valla found herself picking up a message she'd found carefully hidden in the library of Vir Dirthara.
"Beware the forms of Fen'Harel! The Dread Wolf comes in humble guises, a wanderer who knows much of the People and their spirits. He will offer advice that seems fair, but slowly turns to poison. Remember the price of treason, and keep in your heart the mercy of your gods."
Solas had been right all along, Valla thought bitterly. They were never gods, only mages corrupted by their own power. No better than the ancient Magisters who sought to enter the Golden City, turning it black with their pride.
A wanderer who knows much of the People and their spirits.
Solas' final words to her echoed in her thoughts, "No matter what comes, I want you to know that what we had was real. I hope in time, you will understand."
"Vhenan," Valla whispered, not realizing the words as she spoke them, "Is this what you meant?"
Like a floodgate giving way to raging waters, she could not deny it any longer. She had unknowingly given her heart to the Dread Wolf. Yet it was not anger or fear that followed the revelation, but an utter sense of grief. A hollow acceptance. It answered much, but also raised more questions. What they had was real, even now she did not doubt it. If his intention was to spare her from more heartache, or perhaps simply to spare himself, Valla knew he had failed.
"Solas," she wished in vain he would hear her, "if you had just told me..."
"Excuse me, Inquisitor." an Orlesian servant approached, pulling Valla way from her thoughts, "Forgive the intrusion, but your advisers are asking for you. They say it is urgent."
Valla heaved a weary sigh, "Thank you." The demands of the Inquisitor did not allow her time to dwell on what could have been. In truth she was grateful for the distraction, though she sensed their news would be grim.
Arriving in their makeshift war room, Valla sensed tension in the air. "Thank you for meeting with us so quickly, Inquisitor." Leliana said. "My agents have confirmed there are also gatlock barrels in Denerim's palace. They have also been spotted in Val Royeux and across the Free Marches. It appears the Winter Palace is not the Qunari's only target."
"The Qunari are one order away from destroying every noble house in the known world." Cullen replied grimly.
"Of course the news is bad." Valla smirked. Despite everything, she couldn't help but at least try to ease the tension, "And here I thought you were planning a party in my honor!"
Her humor was only met by silence, and Cullen nervously clearing his throat.
"There is a bright side." Josephine sounded strained, yet refined as ever, "Warning the ambassadors will remind them of the Inquisition's value."
"Not when the Inquisition is responsible for that threat." Leliana interjected.
Valla's eyes flew open, "They came in through us!"
"Yes." Leliana kept her voice down.
Valla however, could not control her frustration, "How, damn it?"
Leliana's tone remained even, "The elven servant handling the barrels confessed to working for the Qunari."
"But the servant was Orlesian!" Josephine exclaimed, "That implicates Orlais, not us!"
"But the gatlock barrels arrived at the Winter Palace on the Inquisition's supply manifest." Leliana said.
Cullen let out a disgruntled breath, "How are we supposed to fight a war when we can't even trust our own people?"
"The Inquisition stopped Corypheus and saved the world." Valla reminded them, "We cannot let an outside threat change who we are."
Josephine's calm demeanor began to unravel, "I fought to protect the Inquisition from this Exalted Council...and for what? So we could deceive and threaten those we claim to protect?"
Cullen attempted to ease her concerns, "Once we locate the spies-"
"This isn't about the spies!" she cut him off, "You hid the Qunari body. You've all but seized control of the Winter Palace!"
"We did what was right." Cullen growled, "Not what was politically convenient at the time."
Josephine rounded on him, "Do you know what this has cost us with Orlais and Ferelden? They are planning to dismantle us as we speak! And perhaps they are right to do so!"
Valla screamed as the Anchor erupted in a searing blaze. She clutched at her arm, trying hopelessly to keep the light from spreading. A cold sweat enveloped her, and the advisers quickly ceased their squabble.
"Damn it!" Valla took a trembling breath,"The Mark is...I thought it was fine. It's been under control for years. We save Ferelden, and they're angry! We save Orlais, and they're angry! We close the Breach twice, and my own hand wants to kill me! After everything we have done, they still treat us like monsters." She looked at her advisers, her friends, helplessly. "I...I don't want to die."
Silence fell over the three advisers as their concerns turned to their leader. "Inquisitor-" Leliana started.
"I'm going to the Darvaarad." Valla had heard enough, "I'm putting an end to this insane plot once and for all. You all can argue amongst yourselves once I'm..." her voice faltered, "...once I'm back." Though she hoped she would live to see this through, Valla couldn't help but doubt.
"Thank you, Inquisitor." Leliana said gratefully.
"Do you want us to inform the Council of the danger?" Josephine asked.
"Yes." Valla replied, "They need to know what will happen if things go wrong."
The thought that this could be the Inquisitor's final hours put the advisers own problems into perspective, and they quickly united. "I will handle the Council, Josie." Leliana said, "You have been put through enough already."
"I will ensure we have a full guard around the palace." Cullen added, "Nothing is getting in or out under our protection."
Valla nodded and turned to leave, giving them all a slight smile. She could think of no words to say to them, already knowing the people of Orlais could be in no finer hands.
Leliana smiled at her in return, "Maker be with you, Inquisitor."
At last the giant Saarabas was dead. Valla and her companions took a moment to collect themselves.
"Well," Iron Bull heaved a breath of relief, "That was certainly a fight I won't soon forget."
Rubbing her aching hand, Valla turned her attention to the eluvian in front of them. "Solas has to be through there." she muttered, more to herself than the others.
"He knows we are here." Cole said quietly, "He wants to help."
"Do you want us to come with you?" Blackwall asked.
Valla shook her head. She knew this was one thing she needed to do alone.
Iron Bull clapped a hand on Valla's shoulder, "Good luck, Boss. We'll be waiting here if you need us."
Valla smiled at her friends. She could think of no words to say at a moment like this. Unsure of what awaited her on the other side, she silently stepped through the mirror.
The other side revealed a beautiful landscape of cliffs and waterfalls. Even more elven ruins glittered in the distance. Valla gasped. The Qunari that followed the Vidasalla loomed in front of her, weapons raised, all turned to stone. But before she could think, she found herself running towards the sound of a familiar voice.
Two figures standing in front of an enormous eluvian came into view. One was the Vidasalla, gripping her spear. The other a man, wearing armor reminiscent of the ancient elven sentinels, a wolfskin slung over his shoulder. He spoke to the Vidasalla in Qunlat, but there was no mistaking his voice.
"This isn't over!" the Vidasalla shouted.
"Your forces have failed." Solas said, "Leave now and tell the Qunari to trouble me no further."
Solas turned his back as the Vidasalla let out a war cry and raised her spear. Unable to see the flash of light in his eyes, she froze before the spear left her hand. Turned to stone like the others. Valla moved closer as he began to walk away.
"Solas."
To hear her voice again after all this time, it was almost more than he could bear. Solas looked over his shoulder. She was still the same, still beautiful, with eyes the color of storms. Though he could see the toll the Anchor had taken on her. She looked weary.
Valla stumbled as the Anchor flared again, yet she continued moving forward. Solas turned to meet her, eyes flashing a brilliant blue light. As the light faded, the Anchor too subsided.
"That should give us more time." Solas said to her, "I suspect you have questions."
Looking upon him after all this time was overwhelming, but Valla felt the final pieces fall into place."The Qunari answered some of those questions. The information I found while traveling through the eluvians answered more." her voice was grim, "You're Fen'Harel. You're the Dread Wolf."
Solas looked at his love with resignation, "Well done." he said softly. At last there were no more illusions between them. "I was Solas first, Fen'Harel came later. An insult I took as a badge of pride. The Dread Wolf inspired hope in my friends and fear in my enemies." he smiled slightly, "Not unlike Inquisitor, I suppose. And now you know..." He was unable to hide the grief in his voice, "What is the old Dalish curse – may the Dread Wolf take you?"
Valla sadly shook her head at the irony, "And so he did."
"I did not." Solas countered, "I would not lay with you under false pretenses."
"But you lied to me." the words sounded bitter as she spoke them, "I loved you. Did you really think I wouldn't have understood? Was pushing me away worth the price of hiding who you truly are?"
"I have asked myself the same question, and to this day I still do not know the answer." Solas bowed his head, "Ir abelas, vhenan."
"I'm not." Valla said fiercely. Noticing the sorrow in his eyes, her conviction fleeted. Her grief and anger wrestled for what felt like an eternal moment. In the end, it was her own sorrow that emerged. "All this time you kept this from us, you kept this from me." her voice breaking, "If you had just told me..."
"Then you would carry the same burden as I do." Solas said.
"This became my burden after the Conclave was destroyed." Valla answered, remembering what the Vidasalla had revealed. "I know you gave your orb to Corypheus. Whatever it was you intended -" she raised her marked hand, "- you made it my burden."
Solas looked wounded, her words cutting like a dagger in his chest. It still pained him to know she had paid the price for his mistakes, that the result his pride was now killing her. "It was never supposed to happen this way." Solas answered heavily, "Corypheus should have died unlocking my orb. When he survived, my plans were thrown into chaos. When you survived, I saw the Inquisition as the best chance this world had of stopping him." he sighed bitterly, "I did not foresee a Tevinter magister having learned the secrets of effective immortality."
Hearing the truth behind the events that changed her life filled Valla with doubt,"Is that all I was to you? The means to an end?"
"My heart," Solas reached for Valla's outstretched hand with his own. "You are and always will be so much more. For you have done the one thing I thought nothing in this world could. You have caused me to doubt. I thought I understood this world. The beauty and subtlety of your actions has shamed any knowledge I thought I possessed. Never doubt that the love I have for you is real."
Though Valla feared the answer, she needed to know the truth, "What would have happened if Corypheus had died, and you reclaimed the orb?"
"Had events gone as intended," Solas replied, "I would have entered the Fade using the mark you now bear, then I would have torn down the Veil. As this world burned in the raw chaos, I would have restored the world of my time, the world of the elves."
Valla looked at him in disbelief, "You would destroy everything we fought so hard to save?"
"You must understand," Solas explained, "When I first awoke into this world, I found it more strange and foreign than anything I could have dreamed. With the Veil blocking most people's conscious connection to the Fade, it was like walking through a world of Tranquil."
"We aren't even people to you?" Valla asked.
"Not at first." Solas answered honestly, "You showed me that I was wrong...again. So much of our people's legacy has been lost because of what I did to strike the Evanuris down. But even now, some hope remains for restoration. I will save the elven people, even if it means this world must die."
"Solas, whatever you want, this world dying is not the answer." Valla pleaded.
"Not a good answer, no." Solas agreed, "Sometimes terrible choices are all that remain. In any event, you should be more concerned about the Inquisition. Your Inquisition."
Valla couldn't help but laugh, "Is it really mine? We have been infiltrated by those who would see us destroyed."
"You have created a powerful organization." Solas replied, "And now it suffers the inevitable fate of such. Betrayal and corruption."
"It's not that simple." Valla retorted.
"Do you know how I discovered the Qunari plot?" Solas asked, "The plot I disrupted by leading them to your doorstep? The Qunari spies in the Inquisition tripped over my spies in the Inquisition."
Valla frowned, "Why bother helping us stop the Qunari plot if you are going to destroy the world regardless?"
"Because I am not a monster." Solas said, "I would see those recovering from the Breach free of the Qun. If these people are to die, I would rather them die in comfort."
She met his eyes with disbelief, "I never thought of you as someone who would do this, Solas. If you see value in this world, isn't that enough?"
Solas gently drew her towards him. Valla moved closer in return, sinking into his arms, wrapping her own tightly around his shoulders. To have her in his arms, it was a feeling Solas had dared not hope to know again. "If things had been different, I would have kept you in my embrace only for myself. With you by my side, I would have shown you the wonders of all the worlds. I would have told you that I would rather spend a day at your side than living an eternity without you, because I love you."
As their lips met, Valla allowed herself for a moment to forget. For she knew as soon as she left the warmth of his embrace, the world would once again fight to tear them apart. She wanted to forget the Inquisition. She wanted to leave the endless fighting behind if it meant she could stay by his side. For one fleeting instant she allowed herself to believe the world Solas could create would be better, if only for the reason they could at last remain together.
"Let me help you, Solas." she said as they parted.
"I cannot do that to you, vhenan." he said softly, His arms lingered around her, prolonging the inevitable.
"But you would to it to yourself?" Valla pleaded, "I cannot bear to think of you alone!"
Reluctantly Solas stepped away, "I walk the dinan'shiral." he answered sadly, "There is only death on this journey. I would not have you see what I become."
Valla knew it was foolish to hope as she felt her heart break one more time, "And I would not see you live the rest of your life in solitude."
"It is a fate I would not wish upon anyone." Solas said, "But it is what must be done. I swore long ago that I would restore my people, no matter the cost."
"I still don't understand," Valla said, "Why does this world need to end in order for the elves to return?"
Solas smiled, "You have always shown a curiosity I've admired. It would be easy to tell you too much. Just know that the return of my people means the destruction of yours. And that I take no joy in what I must do."
"You don't need to destroy this world. I'll prove it to you."
"I would treasure the day I am proven wrong once again." Solas said, "Until that day comes, I will do what I must."
Valla knew at least for now, there was little she could do to change his mind, "There is still the matter of the Anchor. It's getting worse."
"I know, vhenan." Solas answered sadly, "And we are running out of time."
As if the Anchor could hear his words it erupted again, causing Valla to fall to her knees. Solas knelt beside her, taking her in his arms one last time. "The Mark will eventually kill you." he said, "Drawing you here gave me the chance to save you, at least for now."
Struggling to fight through the pain, Valla looked into his eyes. They mirrored her own, reflecting her own grief, her own yearning for things to have gone differently. Her own longing for a different world.
"Solas," she pleaded, "Var lath vir suledin!"
The words were like a knife in his heart, "I wish it could, vhenan." He lowered his head to kiss her one last time. "My love." His eyes flashed for an instant, one last attempt to save her. Knowing he had done all he could, Solas stood and made his way to the eluvian, to the path he knew she could not follow.
"I will never forget you."
Var lath vir suledin
Our love can endure/overcome this