Author's Note: First of all.. this story has some pretty big spoilers for the Evangelion series, so please, don't read it if you don't want to risk spoiling the show/manga for yourself.

Just for a bit of context; this story is set after the third impact and after Kaworu's death. There will be more. I'm planning on making sort of a miniseries out of it. If you enjoy it enough to read on, you'll see why. This piece is dedicated to Soulsearcher1on1, who is always encouraging and supportive of the things I do and has been especially so on this project, and to Whitewings9, who suggested I try and write this. I hope I did you both justice.
- Kirei

The Worth of A Miracle - The First Encounter

Pale, silky lips pressed against his smooth skin, making him quiver with anticipation. Again and again the warm cushions explored his body, moving slowly up from his navel and halting at his clavicle. Then, spider-like hands, which had only a moment ago been playing with locks of his raven hair, began a sliding descent down his tense body; stroking his face, his lips, down his neck to his shoulder, over his nipple causing a surge of excitement, and then down further.

Shinji Ikari moaned weakly as Kaworu's kisses and touches pulled him further into oblivion.
"Shhhh," Kaworu cooed, looking up a Shinji with a grin that brought a violent blush to his cheeks. "She'll hear you," Kaworu pulled his face level with Shinji's so that they were nose to nose, "and if she hears us," he paused as Shinji's dark eyes locked with his.
Those eyes. They were the color of rich wine, no, they were stronger than wine, the color of blood. Most people were unnerved by them and the intense way in which Kaworu would look, almost omnipotently, at them. But Shinji thought they were handsome, with their unearthly hue and the look which Kaworu gave him did not unnerve him, it filled him with a nervous passion and a sense of inexplicable joy – He felt loved for the first time in his life.

"I don't want you to leave me again," Shinji whispered hoarsely, blinking away tears. "I.. I can't.. It.. It hurt so much," he sobbed quietly up at Kaworu.
"Then shhhh," Kaworu whispered as he leaned closer to Shinji, pressing their lips together at first gently and then steadily more passionately.
"I promise I'll never leave you again," Kaworu smiled, touching Shinji's face delicately. Their lips collided violently, giving Shinji a shudder of anticipation, the heartbreaking memories of a moment ago forgotten in the rushing passion as Kaworu held him by the back of his hair and pressed him closer. Kaworu's tongue gently urged Shinji's lips, which gave in easily and the two explored each others' mouths tentatively with long wet kisses and gentle sighs.

Again Kaworu's lips began an exploration of Shinji's body, kissing the corner of his raw lips, his flushed cheeks, the lids of his still teary eyes. Brushing tufts of hair out of the way, he locked his teeth around Shinji's earlobe and nibbled gently, his hand sliding down Shinji's bare torso and under the waistband of his taught underwear. The sudden contact sent waves of pleasure up Shinji's spine and a meek cry escaped his lips. Kaworu smirked and clapped a hand over his partner's mouth as he massaged his burning loins with the other. He forced Shinji's face to turn, exposing the flesh of his neck. Kaworu kissed the area gingerly, occasionally nipping as he removed the hand from Shinji's mouth and undid his own black trousers, exposing his manhood.

In a gentle, yet commanding voice Kaworu whispered into Shinji's reddened neck, "I'm going to take you now, Shinji. Don't resist, don't close your eyes, don't make a sound," he punctuated each command with more intoxicating kisses, to which Shinji could only nod feebly. "I promise not to hurt you," another kiss, "I love you, Shinji Ikari." Kaworu's hands hooked into Shinji's underwear and pulled them forcefully down as his lips moved down his torso. Kaworu laid Shinji gently down on the tired mattress, lifting Shinji's legs, so that he had to wrap them around his lover's slender form, and pressing himself against his opening. Shinji bit his lip in an effort to stifle the groans of mixed agony and pleasure which threatened to escape as Kaworu slowly eased himself inside.

As Kaworu's gentle thrusts quickened and his kisses intensified to violent intervals of biting and sucking, Shinji arched his back and cried tears of silent ecstasy, the pain and pleasure mingling to form some unknown, almost embarrassing sensation that devoured the two of them. Memories flooded Shinji's previously blanked mind, marching in front of his mind's eye to the rhythmic movements of their colliding bodies as they both unleashed their fluids; The stray kitten, The way Kaworu had touched his hand and smiled at him, the way he had kissed him with such force that one time, the way his eyes had flashed when he showed his true self – when he had been Tabris, the emptiness of his glazed ruby eyes when he gave himself over to NERV, the splash of the water. Shinji shed another tear as he thought back to that day, he knew something was wrong now, Kaworu couldn't be here, he was dead. Shinji new so because he had been the one to kill him. Kaworu could not be here now, they could not have shared this experience and yet, here he was. Velveteen skin, deep red eyes, his fluffy silver hair, Shinji could see it all in front of him, just a moment ago they had been one person. Perhaps he was going crazy?
'Well ,' he thought 'If I am going insane, I don't care. I want to stay here, with him, forever.'

"Shinji," Kaworu whispered, his chest still heaving from the pleasure of the release, "Tell me" Shinji snapped back to reality and looked at his lover, who was now laying on his side next to him, staring at him intensely, but with that same smile which discomforted so many.
"Tell me that you love me too."
Shinji blushed.
"I.. I love you too, Kaworu." At this, Kaworu smiled, took Shinji's hand in his own and the two sat up, backs against the wall, staring forwards into nothing.
"And, you trust me?"
"Uh.. well, yes. Of course I do."
"If you love me, then, will you come with me?"
"Come with you where?" Shinji asked, confused by the bizarre statement as well as the momentary surge of pain that jolted through his skull, and then quickly faded away.
"That I cannot say," Kaworu turned and looked at Shinji directly, the setting sunlight from the tiny window in the room emphasized the brilliance of the crimson hue of his eyes, as if they were two blazing planets from some far off galaxy.
"But if you trust me, you will agree," he finished, not blinking once, even in the dimming light.
"Kaworu, I..I can't," Shinji said. "I wish I could, but how can I if you won't say where?"
"Then, I must leave," Kaworu sighed, bowing his head slightly and releasing his grasp on Shinji's hand.
"Kaworu no! You said you wouldn't leave me again!" Shinji cried out, not caring about Misato any longer, only wanting Kaworu to keep his promise, a promise that could break Shinji's heart if he didn't. "You can't leave me.." Shinji began to sob, "Please."
Kaworu stroked Shinji's cheek and tilted his face upwards.
"It is not good that the man should be alone," Kaworu said in a knowing tone as he stood up, "Good bye, Shinji Ikari, I will return for you soon." With this Kaworu turned, placing himself between Shinji's bent legs, crouched down gracefully and kissed him tenderly and deeply on the lips.

Shinji sat bolt upright, tears streaked his face and his body ached. It was still dark in his room and he realized, as he fell backwards into his pillow, that it had been simply a dream. He had had so many like them in the past. He had thought he had gotten over the worst of the mourning, but obviously not. A surge of electrifying pain ran through his head and he clutched it with one hand in slight shock. Still dazed by the vivid sensations of the dream he ran his hand down one side of his head and neck, his fingertips gracing a small, unnoticed bruise near the base of his neck as his hand pulled away. He shut his eyes once more, ignoring the scent of Kaworu on his pillow, which he was probably imagining, and without noticing the few silver hairs on the other side of his pillow, he drifted into a deep sleep.