Title: Good. Bye. one-shot.
Author: DanniCoeur
Pairing: C/B
Rating: R? I don't really know because it doesn't have that explicit content. maybe a bit erotic? IDK.
Summary: Suicide note.
Author's Note: Please, before reading, put "Damien rice - Accidental Babies" on your player. I made it listenning to it, and "Cheers Darling" by Damien too. As you can tell if you know the lyrics. Oh, and imagine Chuck sitting on the piano where Nate and Vanessa were playing on some episode of the 2nd season. The empty house, just him and the piano.
Sorry if it has mistakes, I'm not english, so it can have a lot of misspelings. It my first fic, hope you like it, and please tell me if you do :)
Queen of my broken heart,
Here I am sitting in front of the piano, holding a whisky. Do you remember it ? The times we had on the top of this piano? Do you remember the times I drove you mad about me? My hand touching your body, the body I know as if it was my own? The way I kissed your soul with my lips and felt you come over and over again just by saying a few words into your soft ear?
And what about that night in my limo? Do you remember the way you sat on top of me and made me the most happy men on the Earth? The way you moaned in my ear and turned me on like no one else ever did? Not only that night, but the night after that… and after that.
That one time you slept next to me, I spent the night looking at you sleeping and caressing your cottony face… But my father had died recently and I couldn't take it. So I ran away.
You were always there for me. You even said it… so I'd stay. But I didn't. And that was the first of my mistakes. I swear to you that when I was away I was always thinking of you. When I kissed another girl, I only thought of your tongue entering my mouth and reaching every place. And my uncle Jack… Oh, my uncle Jack, darling. He drugged me. You know he did. Those words you said… were the ones I needed to hear. I keep replaying it in my head…
It's too late Chuck. I stood by you through all of this but I can't watch you self-destruct any longer.
And when I tried to explain you didn't give me a chance. I didn't deserve it, I know.
There's no one to blame but yourself. I believe in you. Your father believed in you. You…. Are the only one who didn't. All I wanted to do was… just… be there! Today when you called me your wife… made it sound like the ugliest word in the world. I'm sorry. I'm done.
I have this words playing in my head since then. You have no idea, and you don't care, how much I cried on that elevator. I stopped it and stood there for half an hour.
Do you remember the butterflies I had in my stomach, darling? Since the very first day I met you… but you were Nate's. What happened between us was… a dream to me. I never thought it would happen. I even got punched by my very best friend. Now those butterflies are half dead, because of my unforgivable mistakes.
When I saw the pictures of you and Nate kissing again… My world fell apart. I understand, you want to move on with your life. But… does he make you happy as I did? Can he make you laugh just by looking in your eyes? Do you like his smell like you did mine? Don't you miss my hands running trough your skin, making you shiver?Does he make you shiver? Or is him just the though of comfort you needed? Does your body fit on his like it fitted on mine? Do you come ever together with him, like you did with me? Can he even make you come like I did? Does he show you the world by his eyes, and if so, do you like it?
You know you won't, darling.
I wonder how you could forget about me so fast. What am I, darling? A whisper in your ear? Or your biggest mistake? But that doesn't really matters anymore, does it?
You gave me the chance of my life and I didn't take it. There's no one to blame but myself.
So I'm saying goodbye to you, one last time. My time has come. I won't be any good if I keep myself alive, just drinking and taking druggs until it happens.
With this gun next to my head, hoping this will definitely kill me, I apologize for everything. The pain I feel inside made all the butterflies die, and I can't take it anymore.
You burned my heart like no one ever did, like no one ever will.
I'm bloody yours, Blair.
Ever.
Forever.
I Love You.
Chuck.