Craig was probably the worst ever at practical jokes; all they really entailed were long mind games that no one else understood or snatching something and waiting for the person to miss it. Rick missed his hat alright and he didn't need to ask to know who took it, so he waltzed right into Pinkie's room to grab it while the occupant was out. He found it rifling through the little sneak's closet, but his recovery mission was quickly foiled; he was forced to tuck himself behind the doorframe of the closet when he heard someone else come into the room.

That person had to be Craig; he made his signature irritated huff and shut the slatted closet door, trapping Rick inside of it. He swore silently, aware that he'd have to wait until Craig left or fell asleep before he could escape now. He stood and waited, watching as Craig fussed around the room, righting things without even thinking about why they were out of place and quickly stripping off his suit coat and unbuttoning his vest. Rick sank to the floor, already bored with Craig's cleaning rituals. That is, until a small wooden box was pulled out from under the bed and the door surreptitiously locked with a heavy breath from the blonde man.

...Huh, this looked like it was going to get interesting. Rick moved closer to the door, peering through the wood slats to get a better view. Just what was Pinkie up to? He didn't get his answer when the box was opened. Craig pulled out a couple of items that Rick couldn't see, setting them on the bed. What Rick could see was Craig fumbling with his belt, seeming almost nervous in his actions, with trembling hands placing the belt on top of the suit coat draped over a chair. Next came the button and zipper on his trousers, then his shirt and waistcoat untucked, unbuttoned, and pulled it up so Rick had a peek at Craig's pale waist. The rest of his clothes were pulled off and neatly stacked on his desk chair, leaving Craig wearing only white, pristine looking boxers that didn't do much to hide... a hard-on. It suddenly hit Rick just what Craig was doing here in the middle of the day. He swallowed thickly and shamelessly shifted so he could see better when Craig perched himself on the edge of the bed, slipping the boxers off finally with a bitten bottom lip.

The blonde eased himself on the bed and got comfortable before he paid any attention to his length, but he only touched his fingertips to his flesh, tracing his skin very lightly. Craig released his bitten lip to inhale sharply, panting softly for a moment before tracing the teeth marks with his tongue. That was a mesmerizing sight if Rick had ever seen one; both Craig's long fingers rhythmically running up and down the sides of his own length and his pink tongue trailing across his bottom lip made it really difficult to even want to pull his gaze away. This was a lot slower than Rick would have done it to himself, he realized, Craig was taking his time teasing himself and Rick had not one clue why, but it was damned hot.

All he knew was that the way Craig's head tilted back, mouth open with a silent moan, and the controlled, but quickening speed on his length had the closet feeling very, very warm. Rick swallowed again, pressing a hand against his groin, palming himself while Craig did the same. The blonde's fingers moved away from his length and they nearly simultaneously relaxed, though Craig kept moving, pulling one of the items Rick didn't see from the bed and opening it. It was a clear bottle of lubricant; he quickly realized and honestly hoped he got to see what he was doing with it. He gave up any hope of seeming like anything other than a dirty peeping tom, just hoping his colleague didn't notice him until after the show was over.

Blissfully unaware, skin flushed, Craig rolled to his stomach and pressed slick fingers against himself. A quiet moan was muffled against his bed while he pushed them in and out; Rick shifted just slightly to get a better view. He wet his lips at the sight of shaking hips and frantic hands thrusting, circling, and pleasuring a tense, whimpering Craig. He was going to feel bad about this later, but right now, he brace his elbow on the wall with a hand pressed against the fly of his jeans, squeezing his hard length through the fabric.

The moment Craig pulled away, Rick froze, observing closely; he wasn't going to stop now, was he? The blonde's hands fumbled across his bedspread for a moment, grasping for something long, smooth, and pink. Oh, fuck, Rick almost swore out loud, sucking in a breath in anticipation. He didn't know Pinkie liked it like that; then again, he didn't know he'd like to watch.

Frantically, Craig's hands turned on the pink vibrator to a low setting, pressing the very tip against himself with a small groan. Both of his hands were on the toy, one on the dial at the very end, the other grasping the length of it, guiding it inside of himself while he face was turned toward the closet where Rick was hiding. His eyebrows were drawn together and his mouth was open enough where the hidden man had a very nice view of his pink tongue and slightly bruised lips.

A twist of the wrist and the speed was increased, "Mmmn, yesss…," Rick could hear Craig's very quiet words, nearly masked by heavy panting.

"Oh shit…," Rick breathed as quietly as he could muster, but it was getting harder to just watch now that Craig's eyes were screwed shut while he worked the pink toy into himself.

A very subtle whimper was punctuated by louder buzzing; Craig started to move faster, gripping the vibe tightly while he moved to prop himself up on his elbow, turning himself over once again. He grasped himself with a small squeeze and soft mewl, stroking himself quickly, without hesitation. This way, Rick could very clearly see the both how Craig was pumping his cock and how he was frantically fucking himself on the vibe in his other hand.

"A-aaahhh…," he moaned, back arching up dramatically.

Rick's mouth had long since run dry and his own arousal was beginning to ache from the simple, distracted attention he was giving it through thick denim. He'd sure as hell remember this for a long time and like hell he was tearing his gaze away for a second. His broken breathing started to hitch about the time Craig's did, too. He had also begun to rock his hips up into his hand, his grip tightening and loosening every so often; the man hidden in his closet was watching closely enough to tell.

Suddenly, the blonde's back hit the mattress again, "Hahn, haahh… yes, oooh, OH!" he moaned long and loud, coming fast while he squeezed the base of his cock, continuing to pump the vibrator into himself faster.

The grip Rick had on the doorframe of the closet might begin to splinter. He could only squeeze tightly with another swear under his breath while Craig eventually relaxed on the bed and shut off the toy, pulling it out of himself. His pink eyes opened, glazed over with satisfied lust while he tried to catch his breath, a content smile playing on his mouth. Rick bit the inside of his cheek; damn little minx had to look just as good while basking in the after effects of an orgasm as he did arched up, fucking himself.

When he finally rose from the bed, Rick pressed himself against the opposite wall; now he just had to wait until he had a chance to slip away and… perhaps warm himself with memories of things he shouldn't have seen. Unfortunately, while Rick was nursing a neglected erection, Craig fussed about his room, redressing himself in his full three-piece suit and taking care to clean the small amount of mess he made. Seriously, why couldn't he nap or something, Rick didn't realize he was growling under his breath until Craig looked up from arranging his hidden wooden box. The man frowned and moved toward the closet with a suspicious expression, one that looked almost nervous, like a child thinking there was a monster in there.

Shit. Shit shit.

"I know you're in there," Craig hissed, "Come out, right now."

There wasn't any time to hide when Craig threw open the closet door; Rick had his back pressed against the wall and his hand pressed very obviously to his groin. Both of them had matching expressions like deer in the headlights.

"Richard, what in the name of all things logical…"

"Uh…, hey Pinkie?" Rick offered, with a failing grin, "Uh… found my hat…?"

That hat was long since forgotten on the floor of the closet. Craig's stern pink gaze glanced at it and then back at Rick, down at his hands, and then back to his face.

"Get out."

"Don't need t'tell me twice," Rick muttered, snatching up the hat and moving toward the door.

He didn't get very far, though. Craig snatched the back of his shirt and dragged him toward the bed with surprising strength. It was just enough to catch the bigger man off guard, shoving him backward on the mattress. Rick's faded brown fedora hat fell to the ground, suddenly forgotten when Craig loomed over him and gently pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose.

"You saw."

For some reason that Rick couldn't quite put his finger on, a spike of an odd kind of fear stabbed him right in the chest. He gulped down a retort and nodded, sheepishly. With an eerie calm, Craig tapped his finger to his chin.

"Take off your clothes," he commanded, finally.

"What?"

"Now. You helped yourself to a free show," he snapped, with an angry, embarassed red face, but a cool, even tone, "Now you're going to provide one."

Rick gaped at the blonde standing over him, who suddenly looked much more intimidating; he didn't wait too long to quickly yank his t-shirt over his head and scramble with his belt to shove his jeans down his legs, though. They were discarded on the floor with a glance for approval up a Craig who simply rolled his eyes upon the discovery that Rick had 'forgotten' underclothing that day. Not one bit of getting caught and commanded helped his painfully hard erection disappear. Craig's raking, inspecting gaze across his body didn't help much either, nor did the fact that he didn't quite know what to expect.

"Well. Go on," Craig nodded down to his cock, standing back.

He hesitated for only a moment, watching the blonde carefully for tricks or some kind of humiliation, but there didn't seem to be any. Just his unnerving pink eyes on him while he removed his suit coat once again, setting it on the back of his desk chair. Insanely turned on outweighed staying wary; he gingerly wrapped his fingers around himself, keeping his eyes locked on Craig. The other man watched impassively, pulling back and rolling up his sleeves to the elbow while Rick began to stroke his length.

It took no time at all for just a little bit of attention, an audience, and a long-neglected erection to have Rick's mouth falling open into a heavy pant. Craig's critical, ice cold stare was strangely erotic; Rick was watching very, very closely for signs the other man was enjoying the display. A twitch of the eyebrow at a sudden inhale, a low groan got narrowed eyes and a curling mouth, a louder one got color creeping up the blonde's neck; even the subtle reactions managed to be fucking sexy.

Time to quit playing around, Rick leaned back on his elbow and stroked faster, "Hhnn… fuck," he murmured.

Craig was standing stock still until that moment; it almost surprised Rick enough to stop his ministrations when he began to move suddenly, but he simply followed his path while he pumped himself. The wooden box was picked up off of the floor and set down next to Rick's hips that were already starting to rock upward into his grip.

"Spread your knees," Craig instructed, pulling out some familiar looking objects.

"Y'ain't gonna—"

"I said spread your knees," he repeated, firmly.

The instruction was followed and Craig stood between them, pulling both the small bottle of lubricant and the newly cleaned vibe from the box. Rick slowed his hand down, watching cautiously, but Craig was quick and efficient, pressing slicked fingers immediately against Rick's entrance.

"Ah! Hey—ooh, oh hell!"

"Shut up," Craig muttered without looking up from his work, pressing his fingers inside of the bigger man, paying no mind to going slow.

Unused to the intrusion, Rick twisted and bucked, but fuck, all he wanted was Craig to keep going. It didn't even hurt; it just felt weird and good and... He bit back only half of the moan that ripped from this throat while Craig traced very light, teasing circles on his prostate. The hiss that came immediately after the blonde removed his fingers was certainly not one of disappointment, though even Rick couldn't completely convince himself of that. He didn't have long to feel empty, though; Craig's long pink vibe was pressed against him and slowly pushed until he bucked up because it nudged right where it felt best.

"Shit," he swore, gasping.

"I guestimate you'll last another two, perhaps three minutes more," Craig said, attempting to sound bored, but his face was flushed and not even the haze of lust could make Rick miss his very quiet panting.

Far too focused on the way Craig's mouth moved while he spoke, Rick was caught by surprise when the speed on the vibe was turned up all the way. He stiffened, shoulders radiating off of the mattress with a broken cry. A strained chuckle reached his ears, but he could not care, pumping his cock for all he was worth, suddenly overtaken by the sharp vibrating inside of him. Looked like Pinkie was going to be right, with the way Rick's hips were bucking up wildly and his face contorted into a mask of almost pained pleasure.

"Oh GOD, fuck!" he swore; Craig braced himself on with one hand on the bed, leaning over his bigger captive, and mercilessly pulling and pushing the vibe in and out of him.

That damned pink tongue was above him, wetting Craig's lips right in front of Rick's gaze. The bigger man snagged the front of the blonde's waistcoat and yanked him forward, crushing their mouths together as forcefully as he could muster. A muffle protest melted away after the immediate shock of the kiss; Rick got his fill of that pink tongue sliding against his own then, groaning against the blonde's mouth. The bigger man could almost feel Craig's grip on the toy tightening, slamming it into him much harder.

He broke away from the kiss, "Ahh… ahh, ahh, yes, fuck! AAAHN!" he swore one last time, spilling across his stomach.

Cruelly, Craig didn't stop until several moments later, forcing Rick to ride through his orgasm with a vibe going full speed inside of him, only shutting the vibrator off while Rick finally relaxed into his bed. He fell on the mattress, appearing boneless. His forehead was slick and his stomach covered in come until Craig appeared with a towel, politely cleaning up the mess and fulfilling his normal cleaning rituals. Rick, of all people, could only wearily follow him around the room with his gaze, head flopping back on the bed when he approached. That was intense.

"Y'know, that ain't gonna discourage that little, ah, accident from happenin' again," he said on an exhale.

"Who said I was attempting to discourage it?" Craig said loftily.

"Little show-off."

Finally, Rick sat up and snagged the blonde by the waist, dragging him into his lap with only some protest, "Mebbe next time we kin try makin' two solos a duet," he chuckled.

Craig lifted an eyebrow, "I'm not certain. I could use some… convincing."

Rick turned and pressed the blonde against the mattress, already kissing a line up his throat. The other man accepted, hands splaying across his broad shoulders and a subtle tilt of his hips to grind upward.

"Looks like 'm spendin' a lot more time'n here…"

"Hm, I think I'll keep the hat here, then."

He gasped when teeth dug into his throat, right where Rick could press his tongue on his heartbeat, "…Small price," he murmured.