Holding Hands

"Holding hands is a promise to one another that, for just a moment, the two of you don't have to face the world alone." – Anonymous

How did she get here? How did she get here again? How the hell did she end up at the ICCA Finals at Lincoln Center for the second time?

As she sat in the auditorium, fidgeting nervously and crinkling the RESERVED: BARDEN BELLAS sign that was still taped to the back of her seat, Beca reflected on the past two years. She never, ever thought she'd be sitting here right now. She thought she'd be in LA doing whatever she had to do to become a music producer. Instead, she was waiting for the results of a national competition with a bunch of a capella nerds that had become the family she always wanted but never had. And now she was (hopefully) leading them into their second consecutive ICCA championship.

Well that's…terrifying.

Suddenly Beca felt like vomiting. Because she realized that this was on her. Win or lose, the results of this competition were her doing. If the Bellas won—again—she would probably count it as one of her greatest accomplishments thus far. If not—suddenly she wanted to be that girl she used to be, that girl that didn't care about anything or anyone because she cared about this group and the girls so much and if they didn't win she'd never forgive herself and Jesus, what was happening to her?

"Hey, you ok?"

The voice and the soft pressure on her knee snapped Beca out of her panic. She looked up to see Jesse with his arm awkwardly bent over the seat in front of her in an attempt to place his hand on her knee and a look of genuine concern on his face. The sight was so adorably dorky that she cracked a small smile for just a second and it occurred to her that Jesse was the only person who had ever made her smile when she felt like this. Ever.

But she had to keep it together. "Yeah, all good," she replied with as little shaking of her voice as she could.

Jesse's face turned to one of disbelief. "C'mon, Bec, after all this time, I think I know when you're freaking out."

And it was true. Jesse did know when she was freaking out, when she was ridiculously happy, and when she was so angry she could punch something. Another something Beca never thought she'd have: someone who knew her better than she knew herself. This boy, this weird, nerdy, totally adorable, completely perfect man had somehow movie-quoted his way into her heart and for some reason, didn't seem to want to leave. And she was strangely okay with that.

As the last group took the stage, Jesse turned around backwards in his seat and pleaded, "Please, babe, talk to me."

"We should watch—"

"I don't care what they're doing up there. I need to know you're okay."

Beca shut her eyes in an attempt to not cry. "I'm scared, Jess."

"Of what?"

"Losing." She opened her eyes again. "That was my choreography, my arrangements, my everything and if we lose it's all my fault." She leaned forward and buried her face in her hands. "Then everyone will hate me and all this work would be for nothing and I'm gonna lose everything that means anything—"

"Beca, stop." Jesse's strong, warm hands wrapped around her wrists and gently pulled her hands away from her face. "You have nothing to worry about."

"Yes I do! Jesse, this is my life—"

"I know. But listen," Jesse lifted Beca's chin with his finger, looked her in the eye, and held her hands firmly in his. "You're going to win. That set was kick-ass and there is no way even the Trebles will beat it. But maybe you don't. Maybe you lose and the Bellas aren't reigning champions of a capella anymore and maybe you lose all your friends and everything falls apart."

"Wow, this is some pep talk…"

"You gotta let me finish," he said with a smile. "You have nothing to worry about because even if all that stuff happens, I will still be here, okay? I love you."

"How do you always know what to say?"

"I watch a lot of rom-coms?"

"Of course."

Jesse stayed backwards in his seat, holding his girlfriend's hands through the final applause. He sat there through the announcement and until Donald literally tore him away to accept their second place trophy. And as soon as she joined him onstage after the Barden Bellas made history again, he took her hand in his and held it tight because Beca had been alone enough and he never wanted to stop letting her know that she wasn't anymore.