Preface
I thought he loved me. Those poor girls always do think that he loves them back, until the end. He loves her until he doesn't, and then he does with her. She always misses the signs that could tell her if she were paying attention that heartache is on the way, and that's why it hurts so much when the end comes for them. It hits them in the back, and trust me, it's not unlike being hit by a semi truck. Not me. That's what I always told myself. That poor girl crying over the loss of her significant other, that I will not be that girl, not again. You see this was not the first time I had been scorned by love. I had never healed from the first time and therefore I believed I was impossible to injure, I had a get out of love free card. How can wounds bleed again, when they never stopped to begin with? I still don't know the answer to that question, but I know that it can happen. Trust me, it can happen.
The first man that I loved, before Edward I mean, he was famous too, although not fictional and definitely not a blood sucker. He was, is completely human. So much so that it's shocking. Tom. Thomas Matthew Delonge, the second. He was the lead singer/ guitar for the best band to ever walk the earth; Blink182. He is currently lead singer/ guitar for the best band to ever walk the earth; Angels and Airwaves. Part of me, okay, all of me, knew that we could never really be together, that the age difference was just too great, but still, I loved him with all my heart. I knew that he was absolutely the most perfect person on the face of the earth and that he was the one for me. We are so compatible that I still have trouble believing it. We are perfectly matched, other than the age thing. (And the wife and kids would make our relationship tricky) In my defense, before I reveal the evil number that had torn apart my heart, I'd like you to know, I thought he was younger than he was… a lot younger. Besides, we can't help who we fall in love with. 19. He is 19 years older than I am. At some point in your life, you realize that age doesn't even matter anymore. All that really matters is that you love them. You love them so much, that nothing in the world could make you stop loving them. They could be 50 years older than you and you would want them anyway. Unfortunately, age does seem to matter to the rest of the world.
With the second man I loved, the age difference was greater by far, technically by about a hundred years, but who's counting? I never though I would fall in love again, never having fallen out of it to begin with, because you think when you fall in love, it's final. That whoever you love will love you back and you'll be together forever and there will be no complications in life. Complications are for the books and movies and shows. One you're wrong, and two, my life is the books and the movies and the shows, but we'll be getting back to that soon. Very soon.
I once had a daydream that a vampire sired Tom and then 19 years later Tom sired me. We could then be the same age for eternity together. No one ever did sire Tom. Tom is not a vampire, but if he were, that would make 3 of us.