In Which Papyrus Feels Boned.
Repeating the same period of time over and over can really have an effect on a person, or in this case, a skeleton. What is he supposed to feel? There is nothing that he can do to stop this endless repetition, and nothing he does or says will change the mind of the one in control. They just keep repeating their "adventure" over and over.
No one can know this though. No matter what happens, he just has to keep smiling and pretending and acting the part. It doesn't even matter what he has to do to keep himself going. Nothing matters in the end. Nothing stays and nothing changes. What a contradicting sentiment.
With a quiet sigh (and yes, he can be quiet when he wants to) to himself, Papyrus lifts himself from his racecar bed and walks down the stairs. He really didn't feel up to cooking today, so he just took one of the spaghetti tubs out of the fridge to reheat. It was only one day or a few years old, depending on how one wanted to count the time. Sans would never know the difference. Sans couldn't know the difference because that would mean noticing something that isn't directly related to himself.
The irony was strong with that statement. Papyrus took a moment to appreciate the thought. He put the spaghetti in the microwave to reheat. If only there was an outlet in the forest so that the human could try some too, when they show up. The microwave was perfectly functional, after all.
Speaking of functionality, it was almost time to wake up Sans. At 9:37 exactly, he would call out to his brother. No need to worry him further. Sans was already a depressed wreck, and he didn't need any more stresses to deal with. As the more responsible brother, the "Great Papyrus" would act the part of clueless to keep his brother in slightly better spirits.
Not that it mattered to begin with. Sans tended to just ignore everything that Papyrus did anyways, falling back on his default false praises and unfounded ego-boosting confidences to pretend that he was being a good brother.
Anyone could be a good person if they just tried. Papyrus himself did his best to live up to that philosophy, and so far seems to have been successful. No one has noticed any of his own problems yet.
Well, that might not be completely true, nor completely his own doing. There was the one time that Undyne caught a glimpse of one of his scars. His glove had slipped a bit during training. Undyne's spears, when combined with the strength and speed at which she threw them, were enough to rattle his arm, even when the projectile was blocked by one of his own bone attacks. As the good friend and superior officer that she is, Undyne was concerned when she saw the injury.
Thankfully, Papyrus had a strong enough reputation that he was able to brush away her concerns by talking at her quickly and loudly about some nonsense involving experimenting with the spaghetti instructions by using larger and sharper (and therefore more passionate) tools to chop and stir and heat.
She seemed to buy it.
And then time reset.
And then she forgot that it had ever happened.
Papyrus still didn't know exactly why he and Sans were the only normal monsters to remember through the time resets. Perhaps if he could talk to Sans about it, his sciency brain would have some theories. Then again, it's unlikely that Sans would even try to think that much.
The microwave timer beeped. Conveniently, it was 9:37.
"SANS! YOU LAZYBONES! TIME TO GET OUT OF BED! IT'S ALREADY SO LATE IN THE MORNING! I CAN'T HAVE YOU NAPPING THE WHOLE DAY AWAY! IT WOULD BE IRRESPONSIBLE FOR ME, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, TO LET ANYONE MISS OUT ON SUCH A WONDERFUL MORNING!" Papyrus called. He hoped that this would be one of the morning where Sans blows him off and leaves early. As much as it hurt to see his brother so shamelessly and casually brush him aside, he really felt like he needed the alone time right now.
While the last repeat wasn't the worst one (and thank the stars that the human was unsuccessful in that worst repeat), it certainly wasn't one of the best. Papyrus hated it when Sans told him that Undyne and Alphys were "on vacation." Did Sans really think so little of him?
"sure thing bro. gimme a moment." Sans mumbled. No puns, but still a response. This meant that Sans was having a bad day, which was not to be confused with a terrible day, a less bad day, a new average day, or a slightly better day. There were no good days anymore. This meant that Papyrus was in luck.
A few minutes of quick foot-tapping later, Papyrus shouted to his brother again, "NO MORE BOONDOGGLING, SANS! YOU MUST HAVE BREAKFAST SO THAT YOU HAVE ENERGY TO WAIT FOR HUMANS! WHAT IF A HUMAN APPEARS TODAY?"
Like clockwork, Sans opened his bedroom door and made his way down the stairs. "sorry bro, guess my alarm didn't work."
"YOUR ALARM ISN'T THE ONLY THING NOT WORKING SANS! YOU AREN'T AT YOUR STATION YET EITHER. YOU NEED TO EAT YOUR BREAKFAST SPAGHETTI QUICKLY IF YOU WANT TO BE ON TIME!" Papyrus checked the mandatory "mothering statement" and "work reminder statement" off of his mental how-to-fake-being-clueless list.
"then i'd better just go now. i'm not big and strong like you bro. i'll grab something from grillby's to go so i can make short time." It was a very weak pun, but at least Sans had made the tiniest effort this morning.
"NYEEEEEH IT'S TOO EARLY FOR YOUR TERRIBLE JOKES, SANS! I'LL PUT THIS SPAGHETTI AWAY SO YOU CAN EAT IT LATER." Microwaving was a waste of time this morning, it seemed. At least the scent of the spaghetti was enough to convince Sans that there was nothing wrong. The facade wouldn't hold up if Sans had walked into the kitchen to see the lack of dishes.
"sure thing bro. i'll see you later." Sans gave Papyrus a small wave before heading out the front door. Papyrus finally had the house to himself without a worry of being caught doing things that he shouldn't be doing.
As quickly as only the fittest skeleton in the underground could, Papyrus was in his room, door closed, and phone in hand. Undyne always calls Alphys at 9:52, so Papyrus is just in time to get her when he calls.
"SORRY UNDYNE, I AM CURRENTLY ENGAGED IN OTHER IMPORTANT ACTIVITIES THIS MORNING AND UNFORTUNATELY CAN NOT BE PRESENT AT MY POST. NEVER FEAR THOUGH, FOR THE GREAT PAPYRUS WILL BE PRESENT FOR THE AFTERNOON ONCE THIS... ENGAGEMENT IS HANDLED. THERE WILL NEVER BE A POST THAT IS MORE GUARDED THAN MY OWN! NYEH HEH HEH! OH YES, THIS IS PAPYRUS, IN CASE YOU WERE WONDERING." Papyrus quickly hangs up the phone. He was glad that he wouldn't be lying to his boss. These activities were important and necessary today if he was going to be functional at all later.
Papyrus takes removes a small chisel from a box on the upper shelf in his closet. He lays it on the bed and removes his favourite mittens. He is very glad that he is known for always wearing mittens on his hands. No one will think twice about them.
He sets down his gloves and take a few minutes to stare at his arms and hands. The next several moments are spent admiring the newly clean carpals, radius, and ulna. He stared at each one and took the time to feel how smooth each one was.
Once satisfied, Papyrus picks up the chisel and begins his work, blissfully unaware that he had just made two of the three mistakes he would make that day, and consequently, the worst that he could make at this time.
Mistake #1: Calling Undyne
Undyne was confused and somewhat concerned by the call that she had received this morning. She noticed the voicemail immediately after hanging up the short call with Alphys. First, Papyrus didn't apologize or sound sad in any way about getting her voicemail instead of talking to her in person. That was suspicious. Second, he was vague in his explanation. There were no details at all, and Papyrus was usually explicit and to the point in his explanations. Dodging a subject was something that he was usually not very good at and tended not to do.
Third and finally, he had said that he was going to the late for work. Papyrus never skipped work for any reason. Papyrus had shown up for work sick as a dog only a month ago! The only reason Papyrus might consider not showing up for work or a training session is if Sans was having a hard time. Even then, he would be more likely to do all he could for his brother, and get Sans to call him every twenty minutes to make sure that he's doing okay.
Something must be really wrong with Sans today if Papyrus was actually staying home for a couple of hours.
As their boss (and friend), Undyne felt obligated to at least check up on the two skeletons and make sure that they were doing alright. If nothing else, she could order them to stay home so that they get the proper rest to get better, either physically or mentally.
Undyne didn't know which of those she would prefer.
It didn't take too long to get to Snowdin since she was patrolling that edge of Waterfall already. A brief visit to the skelebros house wouldn't put her significantly behind.
She opened the door to the house quietly so as not to disturb the inhabitants and quickly went inside. It was cold outside! Much to her surprise, the house appears empty. If Papyrus was helping Sans, she should have seen at least one of them in the main area and heard Papyrus shouting at Sans for his endless stream of bad jokes.
Instead, the only sound Undyne could hear were very soft grunts coming from Papyrus's room.
Mistake #2: Leaving the door unlocked
The grunts sounded painful. As a friend, she couldn't let one of the brothers get hurt. Not while she could do something about it.
It took seconds for Undyne to run up the stairs and kick open Papyrus's door, her stance read for battle. In half the time it took for her to do all of that, Undyne assesses the situation in front of her, and is already smacking the chisel out of the dusty hand of a completely shocked Papyrus.
Papyrus heard the loud bang as his door slammed against the wall, and he felt the sharp sting on the back of his hand as Undyne's own hand hit it. The chisel flew across the room and embedded itself in the wall beside his computer. Just what was she doing here?
Papyrus didn't have to wait long for the answer.
"What the hell do you think you're doing?" Undyne's voice radiated anger. Her question didn't need to be answered. What Papyrus was doing was fairly obvious. What she couldn't understand was why. "What's wrong with you? Why would you ever think of doing something like this? I don't get it. This behaviour isn't like you at all! What are you even trying to do with it? What if a human comes by and you're too injured to fight them? Where did you hear about doing something like this? Is someone forcing you to do this? Papyrus, I demand that you tell me right now what's going on."
It took a moment for Papyrus to process the situation and what Undyne had just said. He almost felt insulted by some of the implications of her questions.
In that moment, Papyrus almost considers dropping the facade. What would he have to lose? Unless Undyne tells Sans. He would always remember.
Well shit. Time for some deflection.
"UNDYNE! WHY ARE YOU IN MY HOUSE? I KNOW THAT I AM GREAT AND THEREFORE MUST ALSO BE GREAT TO BE AROUND, BUT I TOLD YOU THAT I WAS BUSY THIS MORNING SO THAT YOU WOULDN'T NEED TO CHECK IN." Papyrus hoped that this would make her back off a little. Technically, she was breaking and entering.
Unfortunately for Papyrus, this only fuelled the fire. "Are you kidding? That message only made me worry about you! You barely sounded like yourself, so I thought that maybe Sans was having a hard time and that you were trying to cover for him. I came by to make sure that you two were doing alright and then I see this! NGAAAH! WHAT ARE YOU THINKING?"
Papyrus stayed silent. He didn't really have an answer that would satisfy the angry fish woman.
"Is this because you aren't in the Royal Guard yet? Is Sans doing something to make you upset or something? I don't understand why anyone does this stuff, but least of all you! I mean, you're happy all the time and you're one of the most optimistic people I know! What could be so wrong with you that you have to resort to... to this! Do I need to assign someone to watch you and talk to you and stuff? Do you want me to schedule more training sessions? It's not a problem! What do you need to fix this thing?" Once the raging storm that is Undyne is unleashed, it is hard to get her to calm down again. She is also not known for being the most tactful.
Papyrus can hardly control his own anger at some of her questions. "DO YOU REALLY THINK SO LITTLE OF ME, UNDYNE? I'M NOT A CHILD WHO NEEDS MOLLYCODDLING!"
The down side to this facade that he puts up is that people tend to lie to him. They lie a lot. For some reason, many monsters in the underground don't see him as someone who can handle difficult information. In reality, he has been killed several times and seen each of his friends and idols dusted many more times. The insistence of others trying to "protect" him from anything negative just made him feel more worthless and pointless than he normally does.
Even though he can say that he finally has friends (or rather, friend and soon-to-be friends), he still doesn't have what he really desired from the friendship. It isn't as though he didn't shout it to the high heavens either. Respect. Recognition. That's what he wants. Not as a Royal Guardsman, but as a person. Did others really view him as so one-dimensional? So clueless?
To be fair, he wasn't helping his own case most of the time.
How was having a friend in Undyne any better than when he was alone when she didn't respect him enough to tell him that she would never enlist him in the Royal Guard? Or even let him handle his emotions himself.
"Obviously you aren't a kid, but you still need help! That's all I'm trying to do for you, Papyrus!" Undyne yelled.
"THEN WHY WON'T YOU LET ME TALK? RIGHT NOW, YOU'RE DOING THE TALKING FOR ME!" Papyrus shouted back.
"I asked you to tell me what's wrong!" Undyne retorted.
"NO, YOU TOLD ME THA TYOU WERE GOING TO "FIX" ME." Papyrus shouted back, "FIXING MY PROBLEMS FOR ME DOESN'T HELP THEM GET BETTER."
"NGAAAH! FINE! If you won't let me try to help you, maybe you'll let your brother help you instead!" Undyne stormed out of Papyrus's room and made her way out the door. The stomping could be heard clearly, even though the snow should have have been dampening the sound.
That was Mistake #3: Letting Undyne leave.