Kanan eyes burned as a cold fist wrapped itself around his heart, he could feel Ezra opening the holocron; but did nothing, he was a failure as a mentor, Ezra need more then he could offer. With a lurching frustrated motion he stumbled to his feet and felt his way out of the Ghost.
He wanted to just get away, away from the Holocron, away from the voices of failure whispering in his head. The walk down the gangplank was less then stable, he could feel the flicking lights of other people around. He walked away from them all, he could feel the spiders going along the fence and started in that direction, away from everyone.
Kanan walked into the fence rather then up to it, a spider hissed at him. Kanan felt the anger boil up in him, the anguish, he lost his sight, Ahsoka and for what? A holocron that would steal his apprentice. He reached out his hand and grabbed the bug in the force, with a grunt he lifted it and tossed it far away. He crossed the fence and kept walking, it was a full thirty seconds before he heard the bug fall to the ground with a CRUNCH.
Time lost all meaning as he walked and stewed in his failings, any spiders he met fell to his anger. It was getting cold by the time he stopped waking, he could only guess that the sun had gone down. He fell to his knees, he'd never see the sun again; Ezra would fall. They were going to fail, the war would be lost, it was all for nothing. Kanan opened his mouth and screamed, his vocal cords didn't work as they should, quelled by his grief, so all that came out was a hoarse whisper. But for all that could not be uttered allowed went through the force, force welders all across the galaxy felt it. Some cried out, others fell into despair, other grinned with yellow teeth and red eyes. The scream lasted a full minute before Kanan was exhausted. Spiders for miles around fled from the man.
He panted his eyes felt raw and angry, his voice tight and abused.
"Such pain young one, do not hold it in, scream for it will set you free." A hand fell on his shoulder, it was warm though to light to be flesh.
"Who are you?" Kanan asked turning to the soft feminine voice.
"Visas Marr many thousands of years ago I was a Sith apprentice, but I was saved by a Jedi brought to the light and trained as a Sentinel. I am like you, I am a Miraluka, I was born without eyes. I see though the Force."
The hand felt like the light, safe and kind, she clearly had not been a Sith for a very long time. "What does that have to do with me?" Kanan asked. "Why have you come?"
"I felt your pain, apprentice for that is what you are, a vision from the Force does not change that. I have long lived in the Force, watching, waiting, but none have called out, no Jedi, Sith or Grey Knight. Let me be your Master, my Master had many of the best teachers of her time and she past her knowledge on to me." Visas spoke softly, as if her voice had been damaged.
"Why would you help me?" Kanan asked, his tone growing angry.
"Because you need it, because I can."
Kanan sat and contemplated what she had said. "Who was your Master?"
"Darth Nihilus was my first master, he destroyed my homeworld, devoured it and all the Jedi on it. Then took me as an apprentice, I spent most of my youth under him, only when he sent me after my next master was I freed. My true Master was known only as the Exile, she had no name but was a Jedi watchman, she learned from Revan herself and from a great Grey Knight and Sith Lord Kreia known as to the Exile. But as Darth Traya to others, Traya taught the Exile, the Exile taught the rest of her companions. I taught the Exile to see through the Force, to see the currents of it."
Kanan was no scholar but a name like Revan, was not one to be ignored. "How did you find me?"
Visas smiled, clearly he wanted greater detail, a good first sigh. "I... felt you, heard you, through the Force. IT was like a sound, at the edge of hearing. And when I heard it. I found I could not ignore it."
"How do you see in the Force?" Kanan asked.
"My people once had the power to perceive events, to * see * through the Force. That sight may manifest itself in many ways, and at times, I may affect the abilities of other to see as well."
"You sound as if that sight is lost to you." Kanan stood slowly, his balance had not been good since the loss of his sight.
"My sight has been... damaged. What I have told you – it is not the full extent of the perceptions of my people. My master – when he showed me my world, showed it to me as it is, it... hurt. And since that moment, it has been... difficult to perceive the Force as I once did. Even now, but after I travelled with the Exile, I feel that perhaps there was a gift in it, hidden beneath the pain."
Kanan thought of his pain and of the teachings of the Jedi. "When one endures, it gives hope to others, and themselves."
"Only when one suffers do certain truths become evident, both of the galaxy, and of the self. And I feel you are an example of this."
"How do you see through the Force?"
"Perhaps it is possible to show you what my people see... what I see. Relax, leave behind your perception of sight."
Kanan breathed in and out, stopped trying to see through the force as he had done since that fight with Maul.
"Now, in your mind, reach out, listen to your breathing. Do not focus on the sound, but the life behind it. Imagine its energy, its texture, in tandem with the breathing – and then, in your mind, step back from the image, and see what to remains."
The black that had filled his vision slowly faded away and he could see, the world was grey to him. A fog clouded the edges of the sight, details were furry and shifting
"There... it is not as difficult as I thought – you learn quickly. It will take effort to maintain such sight, but you now have that power. And with it, you can use it to see life around you in a different way... as I used to see it."
Kanan relaxed the sight, suddenly very weary. "Thank you. I will have to refine other ways to see, but thank you, it gives me..." He trailed off and turned his head away from Visas.
"Hope and that is what you need now." Visas reached out and touched his cheek. "Do you wish to learn? To be my apprentice?"
"Yes." Kanan voice was coarse, he had felt lost since his master past on.
Visas gently pushed her hand through Kanan's chest, he grunted when he felt something tug within him.
"There think of me and I will come. Go back to your friends, a great woman once taught me that being with others has a strength of its own." Visas faded away.
Kanan felt her go in the Force and set off the way he come, following the echos of his foot steps back. When he approached the base he reached for his new sight.
The base was how he remembered it, boxes stacked, ships, people. In his new sight the people glowed, most fell into a grey, some shone lightly white, others red. "That must be the dark and light in people." Kanan thought and straighten his posture, now that he had something to ground himself in.
As he looked out towards the cliff, Hera came raced up to him.
"Kanan, I was worried sick. Are you alright?" Hera reached out to him.
Kanan turned his new sight to Hera and flinched away, she was so bright to look at it hurt. He couldn't see any of her features, just the glowing golden outline of her.
"Kanan?" Hera asked hurt by his width-draw.
Kanan looked at her just enough to see where her shoulders were then let the sight go. He reached out to her and put his hands on her shoulders. "I'm fine, I just need to go for a walk."
Hera hugged him. "Don't ever do that again, without your eyes." The woman hugged him a little bit tighter.
Kanan hugged her back. "I'm a Jedi, I'll find a way to work around it." The Jedi called up the sight again to look at the Ghost, Zeb was there asleep another grey shape; Sabine, grey but tinted with red, Chopper was red and Ezra. Ezra was blue, with red just starting to bloom around the edges. Kanan glanced down at his arm, he to was blue, pure blue. He shut it down before Hera's white glow could blind him again.
"It will be alright Hera." He hugged her tightly then let go. "I'm gonna go get some shut eye, you should too."
He could hear Hera squirm, her clothing rub against itself. "Right, do you want help?"
"No, I need to get used to helping myself. Goodnight." Kanan set off for the Ghost, step a little less sure now.
He looked in on Ezra, when he came to the boys door, the Sith Holocron sitting innocently on the bedside table.
"Can you help?" Kanan asked Visas.
"Step beside it and place a hand above it." Visas said, appearing beside the table.
Kanan forced the Force sight. He could tell Visas worn long robes and had a hood pulled down to hide her eyes, but nothing beyond that.
The Holocron was a dark pulsing red in his vision, he took the two steps and kneeled, a hand raised over it.
"Look into yourself, feel the light within you. Now picture it flowing, let it move and grow, reach out and wrap it around the Holocron, muffle it." Her voice was soft, soothing.
Kanan did as he was instructed, he watched the blue of his aura flow from him to wrap around the holocron. The hissing it gave off, the red aura dimmed; the Jedi looked over to Ezra and reached out, gently laying a hand on his apprentices shoulder.
Kanan reached deep within himself and pulled more of his force forth, then wrapped it around Ezra like a blanket, tight but perfect. He could see the tension fade from Ezra's shoulders, he let his hand move up from the boys shoulder to his face. Feather light he touched Ezra's face, felt the skin that had been wrinkled from a nightmare turn smooth and relaxed.
"I will protect you." Kanan said softly, stood and slight walked out, only letting the sight fall when he was in his own bed. The Jedi was instantly overcome with exhaustion.
A little one shot, I just finished season 2 of Star Wars Rebels and this idea demanded to be written. I don't know if this will get revisited, I rather doubt it. It does have the potential to go far, but unless people in mass beg for it. Which I doubt will happen, I'm not going to worry about it. Tomorrow I shall be hopefully working on the next chapter of, Of Rangers, Wolves and the Freezing Winter. I'm giving Over Sea and Sky a break, I need to do a bit more in the way of character studies before I go back to that one. As always just edited by me and I only did it once.