He had that look again. It seemed so familiar now. Every so often Hermione would catch him gazing into the distance, a dazed look upon his face. She knew what that look meant; know what thoughts would plague his mind.

It would start with a deep, weary sigh. His eyes would glaze over and he would look towards the ground. It would appear as if he were physically deflating, as if the life was being stolen from him in that one breath. His shoulders would hunch forward making him seem vulnerable to the outside world. The position made him look years beyond his age, his desperation almost visibly pouring out of him.

A small frown would mar his forehead. That image tore her apart inside. She could imagine the thoughts that tormented him in those moments. He could never hide from her, she knew him inside out. She knew he thought himself unworthy of her. Not just unworthy of her, but unworthy of life itself. She knew he was torn up with guilt that he was alive when so many others weren't. Especially those that were like family to him. But he wasn't to blame. There was nothing he could've done. This was something so much greater than him…Merlin, greater than all of them. He was rendered powerless.

His next move would be to look up at the sky. To anyone it would seem he was looking for guidance from a greater being, but she knew he wasn't a religious man. Who would be after all they'd gone through? After witnessing so much evil, so much bloodshed it would be foolish to still believe in an all-mighty being that refused to step in and eliminate the evil before its essence could seep into the would poisoning everything that crossed its path.

No, he wasn't looking for guidance; he was attempting to drag his mind from the bottomless pit that was his tarnished soul. A soul that was so broken that it was a wonder it was still intact. But his soul didn't perish with those that were lost. A good portion might've been missing but parts of it were in repair. What once consisted of torn, jagged edges was slowly but surely being woven back together, each tiny particle interlocking to rebuild what was once a great man. And that was visible.

This was her favourite part. The part where he would stare into the distance as if the future was playing out right before his eyes and he was enjoying it. His eyes would sparkle and a shadow of a smile would grace his lips. His head would tilt to the side and he would lean back, languidly crossing his arms and stretching out his legs. Waves of satisfaction and hope would pour out of him brightening the space around him, casting away any gloomy shadows that threatened to enclose him in their grasp once more. Joy radiated from him as he transformed into that man that he deserved to be.

He deserved to be loved after enduring so many years of torture. He deserved a family after being cast aside from those who should've accepted him. He deserved a life after battling bravely and endlessly against those who sought to destroy it. He deserved so much more the he would ever realise and ever accept.

One last action remained and there it was; the deep sigh. This sigh was so different from the previous one. It was a sigh of content, of serenity. It was a sigh of a mature man who was bewildered with the luck and joy he had found in his future after a past which promised something so bleak and miserable. It was the sigh…of Sirius Black.

So this happened one night when I was watching Family Guy and my mind started wondering. I plan to write a companion piece from Sirius' point of view and that will be more in-depth but it will have to wait until after my psychology exam.

Also the next chapter of 'Serpent's Yearning' will hopefully be up next weekend. :D