Disclaimer: I do not own nothing except for the plot and uber OOC of the characters.
A/N: I know I should be updating "Random Drabbles", I'm so sorry! I'm trying to find my addiction to KHR again... I got so hooked up on Merlin, I lost my addiction to KHR... I'm so sorry DX
"sakura ga saku yo
minareta itsumo no sakamichi ni
ah wakare wo"
Oh blooming cherry blossoms on this hill road
I have to say goodbye to you.
The Sakuras are so pretty this year. Here I am standing here after almost five years, this place haven't changed one bit. It almost made me cry. This is the hill road we go to when going home after school. I smiled sadly. I took out the old letter from my pocket. My supposedly love letter to you. I looked at it from my gloved hand. I felt my tears running down my face. I couldn't say it to you then, and I still couldn't say it to you now. I'm such a coward.
Would you ever forgive me for being a coward? Maybe you won't, because you hated being weak. I was so afraid then, I want to say that I love you, but my fear overpowered my will to confess. "How stupid." I know that's what you'll say to me. But I'm not a coward. Not anymore. I'll say it to you now. I'll say it and even if there's a big chance you won't return my love, I'll take my chances. I took deep breath, shoved the letter in my pocket, and sprinted off to the airport.
"naite waratta ano hibi
nandaka kinou no koto no you
kono michi wa sou mirai he tsuduku michi
sonna ki ga shitano"
Those days where we were crying and laughing
seemed like only yesterday.
It feels like this road we've walked on
is leading towards the future
As I ran, in my mind's eye, I kept on seeing glimpses of the past.
"Kyouya! Hurry up! We're going to be late!" I heard you calling me. I shook my head and looked at my wristwatch. We're still 30 minutes early, and the walk from our neighborhood to school is only 20 minutes. A lot of time to spare, actually; But of course, you wouldn't see it that way. You're always the perky one.
"Hn" Is all I replied, not wanting to say anything more.
"Don't 'Hn' me! Hurry up slowpoke!"I just looked at you lazily. You shook your head and walked near me, your cheeks puffed and red. 'Cute' is the first word I thought.
"Let's go!" and then you roundabout and pushed me on my back with your dainty hands. I chuckled at your childishness.
"Hey Kyouya! Look at this! Isn't this Namahage cute?" I looked up from where I was reading and saw the hideous looking creature you still adore.
"You still like that? Hn. So childish, you will never get a boy to like you." I go back to reading my book. I smirk because I knew you'll react at that. 3-2-
"You meanie!" You puffed your cheeks and playfully punch my right arm. I secretly smiled as I feign ignorance to your childish ways.
"Why did he have to go? Why Kyouya?" you murmured as you clutched me for support. I hate to see you sad. I hate myself more knowing I couldn't do anything about it. I could only hold you, comfort you. I feel so helpless seeing you cry.
"It's his time to go Haru, there's nothing we could do." I hugged you tighter. I know you're in pain right now. I'm always here for you. It's because I love you.
"I know that. But I still couldn't believe it! Papa h-he said t-that he'll always be there for me! Kyouya!" you cried harder. I looked up in the sky and I promised to your father in heaven, that in his place, I'll be here for you. I'll protect you and love you.
"Haru what do you want to do for in the future?" I could feel you're looking at me in surprise. But I kept my gaze steady on the road ahead. I kept my indifferent façade, but I know you know me better than anyone else.
"Well, I want to be a writer." This time, it was me who looked at you in surprise. You stopped walking and looked at me face to face.
"Why a writer?"
"I may like to create costumes and stuff, but that's just a hobby. I want to write. You know me, always getting ideas out of nowhere. So I thought' why not write it all down and make a story', you know." You said all that looking up at the stars and then you looked at me smiling softly.
"reinen yori hayai kaika yosou wo
kimi wa ureshigatteta
watashi wa waratte
soudane -tte itta
ato sukoshi shitara mou koko ni wa
modorenai no ni"
You were happy that
every year the blossoms bloomed earlier than expected
I smiled and said 'it seems like it'.
Just a little while more
And we can't return to this place anymore
I ran and ran, I could already feel my legs giving in but I willed myself to run faster. I turned left around a corner and I don't care that I bumped into a lot of people. All I cared about is to be able to get to you.
I looked at my wrist watch and saw that I have little time left. Shit. What to do? What to do?
"Need a lift Kyouya?"
I heard a familiarly annoying voice called me. I turned my head to where that guy is, panting.
"Uma-bakayarou." Of all the times! Why this bastard!
"There's no time for that here," he threw me a helmet; "You'll need this." and patted a space in his motorbike.
"This is only once, you hear me."I said to him as I awkwardly hugged that bastard. 'This is for you.' Is the only mantra I kept on saying in my head for accepting the bastard's help.
"Yeah, yeah"
"Airport" and we sped off.
As we sped off, I kept thinking of what I would say to you. I have never lost my cool, but if it's about you, I just simply lose control. I love you that much. So it's true what they say, love makes you do crazy things. Like how I'm accepting Uma-bakayarou's help right now.
"Hey I heard that!"
"Hn"
"But it's true though."
"What 'true'?"
"That love makes you do crazy things."
"Hn"
"Kyouya, I'm your brother. Can't you respect me?"
"Hn"
"No hope there, huh"
"So you're confessing to Haru-chan." I nudged him hard, making the bike waver a bit.
"Hey I'm driving here!"
"Shut up and focus on the road Blondie" and I glared at him but he can't see it because of the helmet.
We went pass a Sakura Tree and I couldn't help but smile softly. It reminds me of your love for those trees. You always were happy to see those every year. And I remember giving you a little box full of Sakura petals for your birthday, you're face brightened up and your smile is simply dazzling. You're always giving that warm, fuzzy feelings; at first I didn't understood, didn't realized that I was falling in love with you. Thinking that, I have a fatal disease to the point of actually going to a doctor. It was stupid, I know. But I know now what I'm really feeling. And I'll say it to you after all this years.
"kotoba ja umaku ienai omoi wo
kimi ni uchiakeru to shitara nante
tsutaeyou?
saisho de saigo
itsuka issho ni kaetta michi wa
watashi ni totte tokubetsu na omoide
wasurenai yo
sayonara memoriizu
haru ga kitara sorezore no michi wo"
If I were to open my heart to you
And tell you of those indescribable feelings
Would I be able to do it?
For a beginning, there is always an ending.
One day the path we took to go home
Will be a precious memory to me.
I won't forget you,
Those goodbye memories.
When spring comes, each of these roads…
I remember when I first wrote the love letter in my pocket. It took me ages to actually have the will to write the letter. The minute I realized my feelings, I was scared. I didn't know what to do. If I confess to you my feelings, you may reject me and our relationship will be awkward to say the very least. And if you ever accepted, well, I'm happy. But what if we broke up and such we may never go back to the way we were before after that. So many what-ifs, so many doubts and insecurities cloud both my mind and heart; I don't know what to think, to feel; I feel so torn.
But one day, I took all my negative thoughts aside and wrote the letter. Unfortunately I was too late. The guy you liked confessed to you and you said yes. All I could do that time was to just stand there and froze. Yamamoto Takeshi. He's the epitome of the 'nice guy' type. Me? I'm the school prefect. The person everybody feared the most. The lone wolf; the untouchable; but you saw through my façade. You saw the real me. Ever since we were children, you were always there to support me. Having faith in me; trusting me.
"mata aeru hi wo negatte
'sayonara' chiisaku tsubuyaita
sora wa ano hi to kawarazu aokute
dakara chotto naketa"
I prayed for a day where we would meet again
As I silently mumbled 'Goodbye'.
That day the sky was blue like always
So I cried a little
Because you have him that time, since then, I started to go home alone. But I still walked on that road we always take. On the very day you and him got together, is the first time in a long time that I go home alone. I looked up in the sky, it was so blue. So clear; I silently said my goodbye and ran all the way home never minding the tears streaming down my face while yelling your name.
"wazato toomawari shita no
sukoshi demo nagaku
kimi no tonari ni itakute…
watashi wa odokete
'machigaeta' tte itta
kimi ga warau sono kao ga
mabushikute me wo sora shita"
I purposely took the longer way home
Just to be with you a little bit longer…
I jokingly said 'Oops, we went the wrong way'
You smiled so radiantly and looked away
We stopped at the entrance of the Narita Airport.
"We're here Kyouya! Go! Go! Go!" I got off the bike and threw him the helmet and I sprinted off.
"Thanks Aniki!" I yelled at him while running at the entrance.
I just hope I'm still on time. I don't want to lose you. Never again will I let my chance slip. I looked around trying to find you. Damn it! There's no way in hell I'd give up now!
"Haru" I muttered your name under my breath while still looking around. My phobia is acting up again. I just hate crowds. Among the sea of faceless people, I saw you going up from the escalator.
"Haru!"
I quickly ran up and tried to call you, but you didn't hear me. I still won't give up. I made it this far, it's now or never.
"kotoba ja umaku ienai omoi wo
mune ni daite kono michi wo aruita
oboeteru?
ano toki kimi wa
watashi no namae wo yonde kureta
futari yuugure no kaerimichi de
wasurenaiyo
sayonara memoriizu
deaeta koto kansha shiteru"
I'll hold those indescribable feelings
Of moments on this road we've walked on in my heart
Do you remember that time when you
Called out my name, and
We walked home together in the evening
I won't forget you,
Those goodbye memories.
I am grateful to have met you
I'm getting closer, and closer. Huh? Where are you? I looked around me, I can't see you anymore. I've lost you in this sea of faceless people. This herbivorous crowd; I can't breathe. I could feel my chest constrict with fear. No. NO! NO! Haru! Haru! Where are you! I need you….
It's the same, since that time…..
"Hey! Are you alone?" I heard someone asking me. I looked up and saw you, a girl my age.
"Y-yeah" I sniffed and rubbed my runny nose with my arm. I tried not to cry in front of you. I don't want to show my moment of weakness to others.
"Why are you crying?" I looked away.
"None o-of your business" I looked at you with disdain. You crossed your arms with a frown.
"It's my business because, nobody has to be alone." You said that to me with a smile and your hand outstretch for me to reach.
"Why are you doing this?"
"I told you, nobody has to be alone. I think you need a friend, I could be that if you like."
"F-fine." And hold on to your hand and in that moment, I felt I wasn't alone anymore.
"Yey! We're friends now! Come on! Let's go home together!" we walked home together, hand in hand, swinging it as you talk to me about everything and I just listen to you. Since then, we always walk home together; with you talking and me silently listening to you. Every day, we go to school; but when it's time we go home, are the memories I treasured the most. It's those times I could actually be with you and be myself. You see me as who I really am, not who I'm not; thank you so much. For both the memories and feelings you made me feel and experience. I love you.
"hajimete mita mankai no sakura …
arekara dore kurai
kawaretan darou?"
I wonder how much everything had changed
Since we last saw the cherry blossoms in full bloom
I wonder, if it's really been so long since that day. How much we both changed, mentally and physically. We both took different paths. I took the road to become a Police Officer. You took the road to become a writer. We're both striving to have our dreams to come true. I want to be a Police Officer not just because my father is one, but because I love our town. The place that started it all, the place where I met you; you wanted to be writer and now you're successful, I read one actually, it was beautiful.
"hitome mita toki ni omottanda
'kono hito no koto suki ni narisou' tte
nande ka na?
wakannaiyo..!
sorekara no mainichi wa totemo tanoshikutte
dakedo onaji kurai ni
tsurakattanda"
I took a glance at you and thought to myself
'It seems I've become to like this person'
But why?I don't get it at all!
Since then each and every day had been fun
But at the same time it had been painful
Ever since I've met you, you turned me into a better person.
"Thank you, Kyouya!" you smiled at me while hugging that ridiculous creature.
"Hn" I smiled softly and patted you head.
Bit by bit, I opened up. Thank you.
"Let's go watch this movie! Come on!" You pulled me to the ticket booth with my arm wrap in yours.
"I don't watch sappy, cliché movies"
"But– Letters to Juliet is so sweet!"
"You've already watched this last week"
"But still, it's so romantic! Don't you wish to have something like that Kyouya?"
"No. I don't think so"
"But we're still watching it!" and we did watched the movie. I just can't refuse you for so long.
Ever since that time, I knew, I'd always follow you.
"You did a good job Haru" I congratulated you.
"Thanks! I can't believe I won the gold medal! I'm so happy" As was your usual perkiness, you glomped at me.
"Yeah" I just uttered in surprise.
Ever since I've realized my feelings for you, I also knew, I could never let it go. It was…. It felt so good yet so painful.
"Haru!" I ran and ran. It hurts so much.
"gomen ne nanka umaku ienai yo
dakara watashi kimi to nante iu ka …
ima no mama sayonara shitakunai yo
tomodachi no mama ja
mou iya na no..
ii yo to omotteta
watashi…
kimi no..
kimi no koto zutto…
… zutto mae kara
suki deshita"
I'm sorry I can't say it any better
But I… about you.. how do I say it…
I can't say goodbye to you now
I don't want to stay as just friends
I thought we could back then.
I…you… about you…
Since long ago… I've always…
…Liked you.
Ha. All these years of bottling up my feelings, I guess….. My feelings are never meant to reach you, after all. I turned my back on the checkpoint. 'Goodbye, Haru' I silently say my good bye.
"Kyouya?"
I saw a woman in front of me. She looks so familiar. She has long wavy hair, same as you. and… expressive… brown… eyes….
My eyes widen in surprise it's….. it's…
"It is you! It's been... it's been so long!" you… it's you. Your smile is the same, so warm. Your eyes are still expressive.
"Haru. Haru!" I don't know what to think. You stood there, right in front of me. I just want to hold you. I want to make sure this isn't a dream.
"Haru" I breathed your name as I buried my face to your neck.
"Kyouya" you barely whispered but still heard you.
I quickly let you go and cupped your face in my hands. You put your hands into mine and gently put your forehead to mine. I breathed a laugh.
"It's been so long."
"Yeah"
"I wanted to say to you…" I looked you in the eyes, you've done the same.
"Yes?"
"That I…"
"Go on…"
"For a very long time….."
"I've always loved you." and I closed my eyes just feeling you.
"I've been waiting for you to say that, you know."
"W-what?" I quickly opened my eyes and looked at you in shock.
"I've been waiting for you all this time. I love you Kyouya."
I couldn't help it, I kissed you.
"ah yatto ieta"
Ah I've finally said it!
This is so cliche TT);
RR please