Author's Note:

Before you decide to read ahead at the stories I have posted, a warning: I am a very self-indulgent, self-insert author. In fact, 99.9% of my fics include my self-insert and I'm proud of it. So, if you feel like you can endure it, please proceed!

But please remember: this and every other story that I have written was produced out of pure boredom/fun/crack or just because I felt like it. Therefore, it is NOT perfect. I am not a professional. I cannot guarantee that the grammar is spot on or that you'll enjoy it. But if you decide to stick around for the ride? I appreciate it. But I am, (repeat I am) an amateur writer.

I do hope however; I can entertain you for a couple of hours and maybe get a laugh or two outta ya? I really appreciate all the support you all have given me over the years and I'll continue to try and update when I can.

So, thanks! Thanks a bundle!

AND

I do not own any part of Regular Show. Just the characters, Heather and Rye Matthews.

Much Love.

"I looked up the word 'love' in the dictionary and added your name to it. Let's write the word 'dreams' together. Its better than doing it alone."- Chokotto Love (translated), S/mileage.

Java Chip Frappe

"Beshow! We need to sharpen up this place a bit!"

Oh boy, here it was again and here he was in Mr. Maellard's office once again. Benson wasn't exactly sure why he was sitting in this eerily familiar seat for the second time in two months but he was sure he was about to get an earful.

Only if the lone issue was that his boss never remembered his name was the worse part.

Benson resisted the urge to shutter in his seat as he sat just inches away from his boss. The older man sat in his large recliner, arms crossed over his chest with a look of disgust on his face. Had he been thinking of something else to complain about? The look on his face said 'yes'.

"We to give this place a new look, don't you think?"

The question was a rhetorical one of course. Why argue with the man who put his money in his pocket and food on his table?

"Yes sir." He answered without hesitation.

"Good, good." Mr. Maellard nodded his oversized head with ease. "I think you will agree with me when I say we should call in a landscapist to make the park shine once again."

Landscapist? Alllllright, but how much was this going to cost and was it even worth it? Benson knew without a doubt that his boss would leave it to him to find the right landscapist for the right price. Ugh! He didn't know anyone in the field let alone how to haggle to get the price just perfect.

The park wasn't looking that gloomy was it?

"Uh sir," He began but was quickly cut off by Mr. Maellard's booming voice.

"Beanstone, I'm trusting you to find the right man for the job!" The older male was quick to jerk his finger in Benson's direction. "I want the place sparkling like never before, understand?"

He released a sigh; ugh this wasn't going to be fun. Benson moved his hand from his lap and placed his palm on his head before grunting to himself. Where was he going to find someone quick enough for Mr. Maellard? Then again, the yellow book had never failed him before.

"If I can ask," Benson broke in, "Are we under a budget?"

"Of course! Don't be silly!"

"Ugh," Benson allowed his hand to run down his face. "Okay, I can do this."

"And if you can't," Mr. Maellard was cut in as if on cue. "You know the consequence!"

"Right."

This wouldn't be too hard right? Finding someone to work at the park shouldn't be hard, after all Mr. Maellard didn't say anything about hiring a professional, right? And with under his watchful eye, he would make certain that this person would get everything right! There were also two employees that needed some work to do and the promise of a few extra bucks would reel them in without a doubt.

What else was Craigslist for anyway?

XoXoX

"-decai! Mordecai!"

No, it wasn't morning time already, was it? Wasn't it just a few minutes ago he laid his head down on his soft pillow to sleep? Mornings had come faster then ever before since getting his job at the park. Couldn't a guy get a decent nights sleep in this joint?!

He fought the urge to wake up, even if Rigby was shouting at the top of his lungs. Instead of responding, Mordecai twisted his torso beneath his thin bed sheets and turned to face the wall. A lengthy groan left him as he tried to find a comfortable spot on his mattress.

"Mordecai! Wake up!"

Again with calling his name? Damn Rigby and his playful ways in the morning. At least someone around here was excited for the day to begin. This time around, Mordecai reached down to his sheets and yanked them up and over his head. He could feel the sensation of his smaller 'bro' tugging at the sheets that hung over the side of the bed.

"Rigby let me sleep, man." He grunted as he pulled on his blankets once again, this time able to break free the blankets from Rigby's grasp.

"But Mordecai," Rigby persisted, "You hafta come down stairs!"

"Ugh," Mordecai squinted his eyes, trying to resist the urge to open them. "What? Why?"

"There's a CHICK downstairs."

Wait. A. Minute.

Did Rigby just say there was a chick, meaning a female/girl/woman, downstairs? No, that was impossible! It was almost enough to even make him laugh! There was no way there was a girl downstairs, in their kitchen. But the sudden statement from his smaller best bud did waken his senses.

Pushing the covers off his tired body, Mordecai sat straight up in his bed and locked gazes with the small raccoon who stood by his bedside. Rigby's eyes were wide with curiosity and wonder and his little feet jerked up and down, causing his whole body to jerk up and downward. So he was excited for this? Then that meant something was going down.

"What are you talking about?" Mordecai narrowed his eyes with suspicion.

"Didn't you understand? There is a WOMAN downstairs, comprende?"

"No way."

"Way."

A chick in the house? That was more than a little odd. Mordecai was quick to lift his brow in question. Not even Margaret or Eileen came over without an invitation, so what was this about? It wasn't as if anyone like Pops or Skips had a girlfriend to speak of.

"Come on!" Rigby threw both arms into the air and flailed them back and forth. "If you're not gonna believe me, come and check 'er out for yourself!"

The small raccoon wasted no time in waiting for his best friend. Instead he fell to all fours and dashed out of the small room. Mordecai could hear his nails tapping against the wood floor as he flew down the stairs.

Ugh, fine. He was gonna check to see if Rigby was playing a prank on him. This wasn't the way he wanted to start off his only day off in the week. Not only was he woken up early he was also being forced to take part in one of Rigby's games? Two strikes in one day? It wasn't something he would let his 'bro' get away with.

He swung his legs over the side of his bed and pushed his arms into the air and stretched. A long groan left his mouth as the tips of his feathers extended upward. His muscles contracted for a short moment and then relaxed as he brought his arms back down to his sides. With one good push, Mordecai removed himself from his semi-comfortable bed.

This better be worth it.

The taller blue jay moved down the stairs without hassle. As he descended the staircase he saw his best friend at the last step. His paws were wrapped around the doorway that led into the roomy kitchen. His snout was reaching around the doorway, his eyes glued to the scene playing out in front of him. Mordecai joined him within seconds and followed his lead, pressing his chest against the wall while his beak rounded the wall.

His eyes focused on the table where Benson sat, pencil and notebook within reach. Their boss was speaking in an unusually calm and cool tone, his eyes not focused on anything but his paperwork. That wasn't such a rare sight was it? Mordecai then felt his eyes shift toward the person sitting across from Benson, the female sitting across from Benson.

Her long dark brown hair was the first thing to catch Mordecai's eyes. Her wavy locks cascaded over her shoulders and flowed down her back. She wore a pair of thinly framed glasses that sat over the many freckles that dusted her cheeks.

"See, I told ya there was a girl here." Rigby whispered his eyes still stuck on the strange woman.

"Wonder what she's doin' here." Mordecai replied in a hushed tone.

"She's been talking to Benson for awhile now," Rigby added.

"Hm."

That was also unusual. Perhaps she was a new employee? Then again, Benson never mentioned needing more hands around the park. But there was no use in standing around and staring! He was going to get to the bottom of the situation!

"Come on," Mordecai pushed his body off the drywall and stepped into the doorway.

"Dude, wait!"

He wasted no time and entered the bright kitchen, one wing attached to his hip. The sound of his feet moving into the room caused both Benson and the strange woman to turn and stare at him. With his free hand, Mordecai lifted it into the air and presented his best smile.

"Hey Benson," He said, by this time Rigby had joined him and stood at his side. "What's going on?"

Benson turned away from the duo and returned his stare to the girl he sat across from. "This is Mordecai and Rigby," He grunted.

The woman moved her right hand over to her nose and pushed on the nosepiece of her glasses. "Hello."

"They'll be helping you with the digging and planting." Benson added.

"Digging?" Mordecai lifted a brow.

"Planting?" Rigby chirped in question.

"Good to know." She bobbed her head a single time.

Ignoring the questions the slacking duo had asked only seconds ago, Benson continued. "But before we can get to that we still have to make a list of things we'll need."

"Of course." The four-eyed woman removed her hand from her face and placed her hand in her lap. "I know what you'll need but you have to write down what you want, if you get where I'm going."

"I get it."

Mordecai felt his cheek twitch. So what? They were going to ignore them! It wasn't rude enough that Benson completely looked over them but to ignore their questions? It went farther than just crude, it was disrespectful!

Before he could get his opinion in, Rigby leapt from the floor, landing on the table. "Hey! What's going on here! If we're gonna work with this girl, we might like to know what we'll be doing!"

Benson shot Rigby a glare that caused the small raccoon to sink backward until he jumped off the table. "Mr. Maellard wanted me to hire a landscaper," He explained, his voice laced with irritation.

"Whaaaaat?" Mordecai pouted. "What for? The park has never looked better."

"Don't ask me," Benson's shoulders bounced up and down. "I'm just following orders and I expect you two to do the same."

"Ugh!" The taller blue jay threw his arms into the air. "Lame."

"Anyway," Benson jerked his head in the landscaper's direction, "This is Rye. She's going to be in charge of the gardening."

The blue bird turned his attention to the woman once again. She sat with a pleasant smile on her face and appeared to be as calm as a cucumber. So she wasn't nervous with Benson around? Hm, that was strange. Ah well, it was more kudos for her if she could stand up to their boss and his yelling.

Then again he hadn't started yelling, yet.

"But we still have today off, right?" Rigby asked, his pitch changing to a whine.

Benson shut his eyes and grunted, "Of course."

Rigby pumped his small furry fist into the air, "Yeah!"

"So, you're going to need sometime to write down everything you need, right?"

Mordecai once again turned his attention to the lone female in the kitchen. By now she and pushed her body out of her seat and stood up straight. She arched her back and stretched her limbs. After bringing her arms back down from the air, she pushed in her chair and approached Rigby.

"Yeah," The grumpy gumball machine rolled his eyes. "I'll talk to Mr. Maellard and see what kind of flowers he wants in the park until then, you're free to do what you want."

"Cool," Rye nodded her head again. "Text me when you have everything in order."

"Sure, whatever." Benson waved his hand back and forth, dismissing the landscaper.

"Hey, whaddya say we get out of here and get something to eat?"

Mordecai nearly jumped out of his own skin at the sound of Rye's deep voice. He looked at her with a pair of wide, confused eyes. She had a wide smile on her face while both hands attached to her hips. She tilted her head to the right side while she waited for a reply.

"Who? Us?" The taller male poked his index feather into his chest.

Rye let her brown eyes roll in a playful manner. "Who else?"

"Uh…" Mordecai was quick to look down to his small fuzzy friend. Rigby wasted no time in repeating the same action. "I guess."

"But why?" Rigby narrowed his eyes at the taller female. "What are you gettin' at?"

"You don't have to come," Rye removed her hands from her hips and took a few steps forward. "I was just asking, I'm going out anyway. Besides," She paused mid-step and turned her chin over her left shoulder. "If we're going to be co-workers, might as well get to know each other, right?"

As if on cue, the two best buds turned and looked at one another once again. Was this girl serious? Since when was anyone in this city that nice? Then again there had to be more people like Pops and less like Muscle Man, right?

Mordecai allowed his shoulders to shrug before he turned back to Rye. She continued to stand straight with a convincing smile on her face. What was the harm in going with her? After all, it wasn't as if she was going to kidnap them and hold them for ransom…right?

"Sure, we'll go with you."

"WHAT?!" Rigby jerked backward, his jaw hanging several inches open.

Mordecai placed his right wing to his hip and glanced down at his friend. "What's the big deal, dude?"

"But…BUT!"

"Chill."

Rigby then squinted both eyes and poked out his bottom lip. "If this ends up like a crazy murder mystery, I'm totally gonna haunt you for the rest of eternity."

"Whatever."

"So, you don't mind if we go to the Coffee Shop, right?" Rye's smooth voice caught both boys off guard for a moment. "I have someone there I need to talk to."

Mordecai nodded, "No prob, that's cool with us," He then jerked his right leg out of place and bumped it against Rigby's side. "Right?"

"Hmph!" Rigby threw his arms over his small furry chest and pouted.

Rye turned her chin and faced forward. She then lifted her balled fist into the air and began to shake it. "Let's get going then."

Mordecai didn't wait for Rigby to follow after him; he made his way toward Rye and stood beside her. If she was willing to offer up friendship that easily, what was the worst that could happen? After all, it was just the Coffee Shop; it wasn't as if they were going to death row! Things were gonna be totally cool…

…at least for now.

Act End.