A/N: My apologies to all of those people that read 'Night of the ball' as it's been taken down my fanfiction, I'm trying to find my copy of it but my computer broke a while ago and I may have lost it. Also readers of 'Critical' as I haven't updated it so long. I will try and get back on track with all of these. And here is a one-shot to get anyone who still reads anything of mine psyched.
It's short and pointless but I felt I had to write it. In light of current events of Chuck and Blair I just wanted to revisit everything else they went through.
Important note about this story: It is set around the beginning of season four when Eva and Chuck are together and in New York.
It was hard to love. It was especially hard to love Chuck Bass. It's even harder to lose someone you love. Especially to Blair Waldorf.
Blair was proud, she would never admit that Ch- he broke her heart. Because that would be admitting that she still loved him. And she didn't. That's what she told herself every night as if it was a mantra; I do not love Chuck Bass. I do not love him; she hoped that would make her believe it. But it didn't. She said it to Serena and to Nate as well as anyone else who dared to ask. She wouldn't let anyone pitty her.
But when she was alone, either in her bed at night while Serena was staying over at a guys house or the few moments she stole between classes, she would sneak into the bathroom and relieve herself.
Plunging two fingers down her throat and feeling the warm liquid rise up.
He would have been so disappointed. That was probably the reason why she was doing it. To spite him. Spite everything he'd wanted for her and his love for her. His love that was gone. She'd never felt as alone as she did in moments like these. Moments where she was enveloped in darkness, the only thought on her mind was him. Moments where she couldn't escape him.
She could still feel his kiss on her lips, his touch on her skin. She'd even had to start other methods of relief after he'd left. Things the great Blair Waldorf would never dare utter aloud.
The throwing up was easy, she'd done it before when no one wanted her, she could do it again. The only reason she had given up on bulimia was when she was truly happy. When she was with him.
She only wore headbands when she was trying to prove something. With him she knew that there was never anything, so she gave them up. She wouldn't wear a headband again. Not even without him, because he knew her. He knew why she was wearing one and he would never give him the satisfaction of winning.
Winning a war that had only just begun. He may have won this round by bringing back Eva but she sure as hell had some weapons left in her arsenal. The question is when she was going to use them.