RAPHAEL'S POV
I wake to the sound of my alarm clock going off. 5:30am. I groaned and rolled over, quickly bashing the snooze button before it wakes everyone. For a few minutes I bury myself in deep into my thoughts, dreading training this morning. I doubt I'd be able to even look at Leo, not after what happened between us last night.
After a few minutes of silence, I hear my door creak open. I pray that it isn't Leo.
"Good morning Raphie boy!" Mikey says in almost a yell as he loudly barges into my room. "Training starts in 15 minutes!" A wide smile began to creep across his face as he ran out of my room and headed into the kitchen, I'm guessing.
I sigh and dangle my feet over the edge of my hammock, not wanting to go anywhere. "C'mon Raph you can do this. It's just Leo. It's just your older brother. Everything will be fine. I mean, what's the worst that could happen?" I think to myself, grinding my teeth in nervousness. It only takes a few seconds for those positive thoughts to turn sour. "What if he talks to me? What if he can tell what I'm thinking? What if Master Splinter, Donnie and Mikey find out? What i…" I stop myself before I go into a nervous breakdown. I slowly stand up, my feet cold against the concrete floor. I grab my gear off of the floor next to my foot and hesitantly begin to put it on. I start to tie my red mask around my head when I see my door handle twisting.
"R-raph, I um…" Leonardo said as he walked closer to me but his eyes met mine and he immediately stopped.
"What do you want fearless." I say as a secure my mask with a tight knot. My voice was trembling.
"W-we need to talk about what you said to me last night." My heart was beating so loud I swear it was about to come out of my chest. I could feel my pulse everywhere in my body. He couldn't see me this nervous. I can't let him think that I'm weak. I walked towards my weight set in the back corner of my room. I rested my hands on one of the weights to stop my fists from clenching. I can't lose my cool, not now.
"No we don't!" I yell back at him. Instantly getting defensive. Since when did Leo care about what I thought anyway.
"I need t…" he began as Donnie came bursting in.
"Oh. Sorry. Am I interrupting something?" Donnie says.
"No. We were just leaving." I say glaring at him. He took a step back and spoke as he began to leave the room.
"Sensei wants us all in the dojo, now."
I left the room without glancing in my older brother's direction once. I don't really know what I was feeling at that point. Angry? Embarrassed? Nervous? I just wish he knew what I really feel towards him. If only he knew.