Tuesday, March 20th 2001

      Engaging in conversation with other people had become so trivial that he rarely ever spoke to anybody when it was unnecessary, including when he was talking to even the regular customers. He inwardly sighed as he slipped a piece of hair behind his ear that refused to be tied back, and he didn't hear what his employer was saying to him as his mind was concentrating on what he considered to be more important matters. It had been six painful months since he had laid eyes on someone whom he had thought to be his fiancée, and six months since the death of his feline friend. James had thought of nothing but them for those lonely six months, and he had degraded himself to working in a pub that he had once stripped in with Jessie just to gain enough money to live off. He was still unable to talk properly, seeing that regardless of how hard he tried, it turned out to be as hoarse as if he hadn't tried at all. This was all thanks to the electronic contraption that had burned his larynx, and the only reason he had been able to get the job without an interview was that the employer, Elora, had a crush on him. He was still the only barman not to have slept with her, but it wasn't that he didn't find her attractive (he had initially been reluctant to abstain), but he hadn't slept with anyone since the mistake he had made whilst dating Jessie, and he felt as if to sleep with someone else even after all of this time would be like betraying her again. His physical appearance made him look far older than he was; his face had lost every child-like quality it had ever bore since losing his two best friends, he wore small black glasses to improve his vision after Mondo had hit him on the back of his head, and he was more gaunt than what he had been after the split. It was edging towards nine o' clock, and he was beginning to feel claustrophobic as the pub became more full. He despised crowds and feared turning his back on anyone in case they grabbed his neck from behind, and he was always wary of meeting anyone who knew about his previous employment, since Giovanni had wanted him dead once James had revealed that he was more powerful than he looked. He felt uneasy whenever he needed to serve a customer, merely because he hated the stares he occasionally received whenever the fading burn marks around his neck became visible. Even though he hated any feeling of tightness around his neck, he always wore his black shirt completely buttoned to conceal the hideous marks that reminded him of his old enemies. His own mother had shot one of them for reasons other than for his protection, and he hadn't seen the other attacker since Jessie had made it clear that she hated him. Even though he hated working with visible burn marks on his neck and fingers, it was all he could do to stop himself from cracking up; he worked as a chef in a nearby restaurant during the day for three days a week, and he worked in the Silver Bullet every night except Monday. His main objective was to occupy himself so he wouldn't have any time to feel any guiltier or more pathetic than he already was, and he wished that he could take back asking his best friend out, as their lives had been ruined in many ways thereafter. He was vaguely aware of his employer talking to him again, but yet again he was too deep in his thoughts to figure out what she had said. Another barman rapidly drew him out of his thoughts by pouring a tankard of something over his head, and something distracted James' attention and before he could ask the guilty youth what he was playing at; he saw a person enter the tavern that he hadn't expected to see. His eyes locked with the young woman's, and although she looked far different than she had done six months ago, there was no mistaking her.

      Her blue panic-stricken eyes were reflecting his shocked expression, and she was genuinely surprised that he had recognised her so easily. She took a couple of steps backwards and he hoarsely called out to his employer that he'd be back in a few minutes as he grabbed his jacket and ran after her. It was raining heavily outside and he easily caught up to her in front of the building, and she turned and glared at him venomously when he touched her shoulder. He retracted his hand from her fearfully and settled for quietly asking her if she'd talk to him about what had happened between them, except Jessie found that thought repugnant to her system. She kneed him in the crotch, and the staff members of The Silver Bullet were receiving great enjoyment out of seeing an argument unfold in front of them, even though they couldn't hear what was being said. He didn't flinch in the slightest as she did it but as an alternative he asked her if she really thought it would hurt him if he had survived his leg being imprisoned in a wild pokémon trap, and tears filled her eyes when she realised that she was trying to avoid someone whom she had spent most of her life with. She backed off from him again and shivered slightly as heavy raindrops dripped from the gutter down the back of her neck, and out of his usual politeness, James removed his jacket and wrapped it around her shoulders in case she caught a chill. Her long, buttoned-over coat prevented her from being too cold, but at least his jacket protected the back of her neck from the elements, and she expressed her gratitude as civilly to him as she could. He asked her if she'd go somewhere so they could talk, and she snapped angrily that she didn't want to go anywhere near him in case he attacked her with something. He was genuinely hurt by this and said:

      "If that's what you truly believe, I honestly don't know how you gained any evidence to back your theory. Have I ever hurt you physically?"

      "Emotionally"

      "So how could I hurt you if we went somewhere to talk? It's been half a year Jessie, and don't you think it's time we at least talk about what happened if you want to continue ignoring me?"

      "There's no way I'm letting you into my flat"

      "Come to mine then; I'll let you keep the keys so I can't lock you in if that's what you're worried about. Come into the back of the pub, just please talk to me"

      "I don't trust you. You aren't the man I fell in love with"

      "Yes I am, I haven't touched anything in years, and I certainly haven't changed since the day I asked you to marry me"

      "You slept with someone else, who wanted me DEAD, yet you're no different. How intriguing"

      "Jessie, I told you how much I regret it. I honestly thought you had slept with him deliberately, and how was I supposed to know that she was the one behind the threats?"

      "You shouldn't have gone near her at all, if you cared about me that is"

      "Of course I care about you—do you know how hard it has been for me over the last six months? You left without hearing me out"

      "What do you mean I left? You were the one who discharged themselves early"

      "Actually Jessie, you were and the nurse told me that. I felt like I was going insane without you, and all…"

      "Shut up for a second, I didn't leave the hospital for three weeks to find out if the drugs in my system were lethal. You checked out in the first morning you were there"

      "I didn't Jessie, I needed to be drip-fed since my throat was out of commission. I couldn't survive if I had left. Why do you think I still have difficulty talking? Because my throat's still fucked up from the fight, that's why. We were probably told different information because you were the one who forbade me to see you in the first five minutes you were awake"

      "Whatever"

      "Will you please talk to me? You can pick the destination and time we'll be together, you can decide anything you want"

      "Fine. We'll go back to your place but I'm not staying the night"

      "I wasn't expecting you to"

      "I just want to eliminate any of your thoughts that makes you think that I'd want to sleep with you"

      "Please give me a minute to just tell my boss that I'm taking a night off. It'll only take a few seconds"

      He raced into the pub and told Elora that he was leaving his shift early, and she seemed far from pleased with the concept as it showed she had some proper opposition for his love. She reluctantly agreed to let him leave and he said he'd work on his night off to compensate for it, and another barman shouted out on his way out that he shouldn't stand in the rain to wash the tankard of rum out of his hair. James was so wrapped up in his thoughts that he had completely forgotten that there was alcohol in his hair, and he glared mockingly at the youth who had said it as he left. He felt awkward as he walked alongside his ex-fiancée, mainly because she seemed afraid in his company, and although they were discussing unimportant matters, both of them knew that they'd be discussing topics that were in no way trivial once they were out of the miserable weather. As the door shut into his apartment, a pair of world-weary ice-blue eyes flew open across the town…

      James was nervous as he sat at the opposite end of the room to Jessie—it didn't seem right to distance himself from the only person whom he cared about, but he didn't want her worrying about his intentions if he was too close to her. He asked her if she'd like anything, and offered to leave her coat on a heater to dry it off a bit, and her sharp refusal made him rethink before he said anything else to her. The apartment he lived in was small but furnished, and he was lucky enough to have central heating in it. It was one of the very few luxuries he actually had in his life and in place of drying her coat for her, he passed her a warm towel whilst drying his hair off with another. She refused to make eye contact for a few minutes until she finally glanced at him and said sharply:

      "So talk, because I'm not willing to do anything else with you"

      "Jess, for the last time, I don't want to do anything to or with you that you wouldn't want. Don't you think it's time we tried to solve the argument that began months ago?"

      "The one regarding your dirty little habit that you failed to tell me about, or the one regarding your dirty little slut that you failed to tell me about"

      "She wasn't a dirty little slut—even though it's irrelevant, she was raped twice before I slept with her. I didn't know who she was regarding our threats, and that's the truth. As for my habit, I haven't touched anything in years"

      "How do you expect me to believe you when you never told me about it in the first place? I've spent all of my proper life with you James, and you never even considered telling me about it? You never told me you murdered someone"

      "I've contemplated telling you ever since I met you, but whenever I gathered enough courage to tell you, I lost it for fear of losing you. I didn't murder Carlotta, I didn't even know she was pregnant"

      "As if"

      "Jessie, I couldn't see she was pregnant—I don't even know how far gone she was. She had no bump, and I have regretted taking her to HIM ever since I learned about what he did to her. My conscience has done nothing but eat at me since I saw du Paor kill a guy that owed him money. After that, I was drawn into the world of narcotics and did whatever he asked in case I was dead by the time you graduated from that school. I'd smoked some hash with my aunt in the past, so it wasn't completely new to me, and it doesn't make it excusable in any way"

      "Are you trying to earn my sympathy?"

      "Nope, just telling you what my life was like"

      "Why? Why did you get involved at all? Why didn't you leave?"

      "I was fifteen, and had witnessed a murder. I was scared to run, as I didn't know what emissaries he had positioned around the city. If I'd have left, I may never have seen you again"

      James' voice was far harsher sounding than it had been when he had met Jessie, and he excused himself as he went to the kitchen to get a drink to line his throat with moisture. He asked Jessie if she wanted anything whilst he made himself a cocktail, she said that she'd have whatever he was having. He slipped some of his medication into one of them and he handed Jessie the other glass and he asked her if she wanted anything to eat. She declined and informed him that she wasn't intending on staying for very long, but he did notice that she said it without the curt tone that she had been using for most of the night. He detested the taste of his medication, but he knew it was necessary if he wanted to have any hope of regaining his voice completely, and he was eternally grateful that it wouldn't matter if he mixed alcohol with it or not, as it would be absorbed into his bloodstream the second it was in his mouth. He was still sitting at the opposite side of her in case she feared his proximity, and he noticed that she had warmed to him considerably since he had gone to make the cocktails. There were also noticeable changes regarding Jessie; even though her long coat covered up most of her body, he could tell that she had lost weight as well, and her usually long magenta hair was now shoulder-length, dyed the same colour that her mother's had been. Jessie had never told him anything about Miyamoto—it was only what he had learned from the Team Rocket files that he had realised what her mother's fate had been. Whereas he had hidden a large part of his past from Jessie for fear of scaring her, he didn't know anything much about hers because she hadn't felt ready to tell him, or so he believed. Her eyes seemed to have lost a sparkle that he had once loved, and he noticed that her actions seemed more carefree than they were when she had first sat with him; it was almost as though she was allowing herself to forget about her anger. Her fractional acceptance of his friendship was becoming visible, and by the end of the night, it was evident that she had forgiven him and his adult facial features were looking younger as he was laughing with the woman he loved for the first time in over half a year. The atmosphere changed when Jessie invited him to sit beside her, and she loosened the zip on her coat down by a few inches, and she showed him that she still wore the locket that he had given her as a token of his affection. He slid his fingers under the light metal and when he lifted it out of her clothes, he saw that she had her engagement ring on the chain too. He looked into her eyes and said that he genuinely thought he had annoyed her too much for her to still keep the items of jewellery, and she whispered that she wouldn't throw anything like those away seeing that they held so much sentimental value for her. He suddenly realised where his hand was, and he quickly retracted it to avoid her thinking that he was doing something with bad intentions, except his apology was never completed. She closed her mouth over his and pulled him closer to her person than he would have imagined, and he was earnestly surprised by her show of affection. She untied his hair and ran her fingers through it as their session became more intense, and she suddenly pulled back and with a perplexed (yet amused) grin, she said:

      "What the hell have you got in your hair?!"

      "You know how my hair looked wet when you came into The Silver Bullet earlier?"

      "Yes…?"

      "I hadn't been outside—I wasn't paying any attention to the other members of staff, and they got revenge by pouring a drink over my head"

      "Would you not think of washing it?"
      "I haven't had a chance to. I was going to do it after you'd gone since you've made it clear to me that you aren't staying for long"

      "What if I said I want to?"

      "I'm not sure whether to believe you or not"

      "I want to James, there's still a lot we need to talk about"

      "Are you serious? I thought you said that under no circumstances would you stay longer than necessary"

      "I know, but I really miss you, and to have your company for so short a time and then just sacrifice it for nothing—I couldn't do it to you. Or to myself for that matter"

      "Just be warned, my bed is very small and uncomfortable. You're probably used to better things in life"

      "I don't care as long as it's with you"

      "I think it would be better for both of us if we slept in different living quarters for a while. I don't want you thinking that I have any intentions that aren't there"

      "Don't you find me attractive enough anymore?"
      "Of course I do, and I have yet to find a woman near your beauty. It's not that I don't want to sleep with you—trust me, I do—it's just if we slept together on the first night of seeing each other in half a year. Well, you might decide that I forced you into it or something"

      "With an attitude like yours I'd be the one doing all the forcing. I understand your logic though, so we can wait another while. After six months apart, what difference will a few more pathetic days make?"

      "Thank you for seeing my point of view; I wasn't sure if it would make any sense to you. I haven't slept with anyone since—since"

      "Since you cheated on me"

      "Yeah. I know it sounds stupid, but the idea of another woman like that would be a total betrayal of your trust"

      "That's so sweet, but unfortunately I didn't take the same route completely. There were a couple of guys along the way, but none matched up to you. They left me feeling empty when I'd nearly married you"

      "It's your body, and I didn't expect you to keep the same bond. I think my guilt is what strengthened my chastity to that extent"

      "If we continue talking about the past, we'll end up fighting. Can we just make a fresh start?"

      "Sounds great to me Jess"

      "You do realise fresh starts include showers? If you're expecting me to run my fingers through your sticky hair again…"

      "Alright, I get the message! I'll go have a quick shower and then when I get out we can start again"

      It took James a full fifteen minutes to rid his hair of the offending alcohol and its sticky remnants, and to annoy him further, he realised that there were no clean towels left in there. He mentally groaned as he pulled his jeans over his wet skin, and he went over to his bedroom to get a couple more to dry himself with. Just before he opened the door, he realised that Jessie was nowhere to be seen around the small room he was in, and he knocked before he pressed down on the handle. Much to his relief, he heard her ask him if he needed anything, and he asked her if she could pass him out a towel. He coughed as his throat was gradually becoming dry again, and he went to the kitchen for another drink to moisten his throat. He heard the bedroom door open as he put his glass down again, so he returned to the door and he immediately noticed that she hadn't left the room. He knocked slightly on the ajar door before asking her if it was all right to enter, and when he received an affirmative answer, he pushed it open and wondered why she was acting like this. He quickly found out his answer though.

      The only light on in the room was the bedside lamp, and he automatically saw her without any difficulty; she was sitting on the bed with the towel in question wrapped around her (what seemed like otherwise naked) body. She nervously asked him to sit beside her, and he agreed with an eerie sense of reluctance that originated from his fear of not being able to trust himself. His fears were enhanced when she asked him to take it from her, and with powerful self-restraint he said no, and partially to his dismay, she repeated her request.

      "Take it James"

      "I--can't"

      "You can. Please just take it"

      "Have you got anything else on?"

      "No. But there's a reason"

      "I can't then. I promised you that I wouldn't treat you like that for tonight, and I'm standing by my word"

      "James, I'm begging you"

      "I really want to Jessie, but if I do, you know what we'll do"

      "I want to show you something, I'm not asking for sex"

      "Did someone hit you?"

      "No"
      "What is it? Is there something wrong?"
      "I really don't want to have to say it, so will you please take it? It may be awkward for you this way, but I really can't bring myself to say it"

      "Is it something another man did to you when you slept with him?"
      "Yes and no"

      "You're not making any sense to me I'm afraid"

      "I didn't think I was. Please will you take it off?"

      "Are you sure you want me to?"

      "Y-yes"

      "Certain?"

      "Yes. I need to tell you, but I can't bring myself to say the words"

      "Do you need more time or anything? If it's awkward…"

      "No. It needs to be said now—you'll find out yourself in a while, and I don't want that. Please?"

      He initially looked away as he prised the material from her grasp, and it took her touch to tilt his head back towards her to face her body, and he understood what she had meant with her odd phrases minutes beforehand. He stretched his hand forward and ran his hand over her slightly raised stomach; even though she was almost as flat-stomached as he had known her all his life, there was no doubting that she was pregnant. He ignored every other part of her body as he looked at her abdomen, until he covered her up again and finally looked into her eyes and asked her how many months she had been like that. Tears welled up inside them and she held him for some comfort before choking out:

      "Six"

      "Do you know whose it is?"

      "Yes—I was told I was pregnant in the hospital when all of those tests were being run on me, and I needed to stay so long because it might have died from the drugs"

       "So is it mine?"

      "I only had unprotected sex with you, and there's only one time I could have conceived"

      "Was it…?"

      "I got something in return for losing my virginity"

      "So that's why you were afraid to tell me? Did you think I wouldn't be interested in raising a child?"

      " I was afraid. I'd been such a bitch to you, and then I'd go looking to you to be a father to a child you didn't even know about"

      "Jessie, I'd stand by you even if it wasn't my child. I couldn't turn my back on you, ever, even after you turning your back on me"

      "That's why I went into the pub tonight. I'd heard from a few people that you worked there, and I thought I'd find somewhere dark or something. I wanted to just see you without any fighting or anything, and I went into a defensive mode when you recognised me as quickly as you did"

      "How could I not? You're all I've thought about since what happened in the hospital. Did you see if Tyra was alright when you left?"

      "Are you still hung up on her?"

      "No, far from it. I just wanted to know if she was safe"

      "Why should you care?"

      "She helped us, and if it weren't for her, you'd be dead. You stopped breathing and she saved you. I could barely breathe from the electricity and she resurrected you, so to speak. If she hadn't been there…"

      "We wouldn't have been in the situation in the first place"
      "That's not true. Didn't you notice that the only one to attack us was…?"

      "Chopper"

      "Yeah"

      "I never saw him again either. Good riddance to them both"

      "You won't see him again"

      "How do you know? You can't guarantee my safety from him. I've feared them all that time I was apart from you"
      "It was needless fear, trust me"

      "Why are you so certain? Just because they wanted to split us up doesn't mean that they'll stop if we did"

      "Oh hell, you don't know"

      "Know what? Is he in prison or something?"

      "Um, not quite. But he'll never be free to hurt you again"

      "What? Now who's not making any sense?"

      "He's dead. I saw him die"

      "You didn't kill him, did you?"

      "Of course not, though I wanted nothing more than that at the time. It happened the first night we were in there"

      "He's DEAD?"

      "Yes. His employers were very angry that you were alive, regardless of the fact that you hated me. Also, she was displeased about something else, so she shot him"

      "Whom exactly are we talking about?"

      "If I were to say that Chopper had ruined a perfectly good designer carpet for nothing in his attempts to kill us, would you know then?"

      "No…it can't be…"

      "Yes, it was my parents. They were the ones to welcome us into their home, and they left so we couldn't see who was behind our three weeks of hell"

      "But why?"

      "Don't know. I was going to ask Tyra, since I wanted to tear her throat out less than I did Chopper, but due to my speech impediment, that was impossible. I felt dead to the world—I didn't have anyone to keep company with"

      "That's how I felt too, especially when I found out about Meowth"

      They both fell silent at the mention of their friend's name, and James suddenly stood up and walked over to his bag of meagre belongings. He tossed a couple of small, spherical objects in her direction and he explained that Karen {the housemaid} had been considerate enough to hand them into the hospital. He said that he had been taking care of them as he only had Victreebel and Growlithe left, and that he had released Pikachu and all of the other pokémon intended for Giovanni into the wild. As for the money, he had set it aside in a bank where he added to it with his wages seeing that he had no need for it; without someone to share money with, it was merely a material possession, not to mention he had always survived off a low supply of it. He noticed that she was still distraught over the situation, so he sat beside her again and kissed her hair as he held her close to his body. She found comfort in his actions, regardless of the fact that he was still wet from his shower, and he soothed her to the point of ending her crying. She felt tired as he continued to run his hand along her back, but she quickly drew herself out of her stupor by sitting back and asking him if he was angry at her for springing it on him. He rejected her question and he cautiously explained that although he didn't intend having children this early in his life, he knew that he'd love to raise someone with her. Although she didn't voice her second question, she wanted to know whether or not he would keep that attitude if another fight occurred between them. He kissed her on her lips and whispered that he needed to go to sleep soon to make sure he'd be up for his second job, which left disappointment visible on Jessie's face. It was palpable to him that she was nervous as she repeated her request for him to share a bed with her and she added that she wouldn't have sex with him, and he chose to comply this time as he still had a few questions to ask her about the last six months before he went asleep. She slid the towel off and handed it to him before warning him to forget any thoughts regarding touching her body when he was still as wet as he was. He allowed his eyes to roam over her body as he dried himself off before removing his jeans and switching off the bedside lamp. Since the bed was small, they had no choice but to hold each other tightly, and they both fell asleep with a new sense of hope within their hearts.

      PAIN. That was all that the owner of the blue eyes could feel as he came face to face with two people that wore matching cruel smiles. The older man was better known as Giovanni, head of the illegal organisation Team Rocket, and the younger woman was one of his more trustworthy employees, Cassidy. Her pale amethyst eyes were dancing with vindictiveness, and she tilted his head to face hers directly before hissing:

      "Welcome back to the world of the living"