All I Want Is You
Summary: What was Ryan thinking right before he kissed Taylor at the end of 4x4's "The Metamorphosis?"
Pairing: R/M (of course!)
Rated: T
Disclaimer: The O.C. belongs to Josh Schwartz and FOX if it belonged to me Marissa would be alive and with Ryan right now. Lyrics belong to the unbelievable U2
"You say you want diamonds and a ring of gold.
You say you want your story to remain untold.
But all the promises we made,
From the cradle to the grave,
When all I want is you."
U2-All I Want Is You
Ryan knew that helping Taylor out was the right thing to do. But he couldn't could he? It wasn't right...Not so soon after…after he'd lost her…God just thinking about her made his heart ache now…He used to think of her and smile or laugh, or feel his heart skip a beat with desire but now…now he just felt empty…like a piece of him was missing.
She was missing. His Marissa was gone because of Volchok…I should've fucking killed him when I had the chance…
Calm down Atwood.
Ryan told himself as his rage taking control of him as it had so many times before. He shouldn't even be doing this. He was down getting involved in other people's lives.
Hell, I've got enough trouble with my own. It takes everything I've got just to get out of bed in the morning.
But something Sandy had said had Ryan driving to the yacht club against his better judgment to help Taylor out.
As he parked the Range Rover at the yacht club and got out Ryan started thinking of ways to make the lawyer think that he and Taylor were actually in love.
Then it hit him.
Entering the yacht club, Ryan scanned the crowd until he spotted Taylor sitting at the bar next to the familiar French guy from earlier.
For a moment Ryan closed his eyes and tried to think of every passionate moment that he and Marissa had shared.
Who are you?
Whoever you want me to be.
Kissing her on the Ferris wheel…twice.
The night in the tiki house where they'd first made love.
The electricity between them as they sat in Sandy car the night they had saved Trey from going back to prison for dealing drugs.
"I love you," His breathless whisper before her lips met his in the penthouse on New Year's Eve.
Ryan opened his eyes and instead of seeing Taylor in front of him he saw Marissa standing in front of him and he grabbed her in a passionate embrace and kissed her with all the emotion that he should've shown her every day of her life.
"Sorry, I'm late," He murmured between kisses.
In his mind, Ryan heard Marissa's sweet familiar voice.
"You're just in time."
In the background Ryan heard the voice of the French man but he tried to ignore it.
In that Marissa and not Taylor that grasped his wrist tightly in that moment.
But when the French man's voice faded away, Ryan opened his eyes, reluctant to let go of the memory of her.
And then reality struck. He pulled away from Taylor and gently wrenched her arm from his wrist, leaving her murmuring his name.
"Ryan…"
Taylor's voice called out to him.
"Don't worry about it."
He called behind him as he headed for the door.
"Thank you."
I love you, Riss.
He thought to himself as he got back in the car and headed home.
Finis