The Choice
By: Chii Maxwell
Disclaimer: I own nothing except the plot. Actually, I owe the plot to one of my friends who told me something about them. Thanks a lot for actually telling me!
Author Note: Hey. I was just listening to the great and talented Eminem and realized that I really enjoy the song Solider. I thought it kind of fit considering Heero is the big bad solider man. Now it's not a song fic but I just thought part of the lyrics really fit Heero's point of view in the whole series. I've decided I want to look normal and I'm going to post the part of the lyrics that really fit Heero because some parts don't. Like, Heero doesn't hate Kim and doesn't have law suits against him. ; ::Scrams::
in confrontation ain't no conversation,if you feel you're in violation, any hesitation'll get you killed, if you feel it, kill it, ifyou conceal it, reveal it, being reasonable will leave you full of bullets, pull it, squeeze it,till it's empty, tempt me, push me, pussies, I need a good reason to give this trigger a good squeeze... [CHORUS] I'm a soldier, these shoulder's hold up so much, they won't budge, i'll never fall or fold up, i'm a soldier, even if my collar bone's crush or crumble, I will never slip or stumble, i'm a soldier, these shoulder's hold up so much, they won't budge, i'll never fall or fold up, i'm a soldier, even if my collar bone's crush or crumble, I will never stumble...-- -- --
It was a suspiciously cheerful looking day on the colony. The artificial sunlight was bright and warm compared to how it was a day ago. It had been raining on the whole colony for awhile because of a fire that had occurred from explosives a few days before. As one boy looked out the circular grimy window in front of him, he knew it was his fault. He smirked at nothing in particular from the window sill he was sitting on and then was interrupted by the sound of someone clearing their throat. He turned his sea blue eyes to the side and looked at the source. It was the man that took him in just days ago.
"Time for your training" He said simply and walked away. The young boy stood up, running a hand thru his chocolate brown hair. He cracked his knuckles and sighed deeply. He felt as if he was missing something, but had no clue what. He stared around the room and tried to decide on what it was.
"Shelter, bed, clothes, food, water…" He stated out loud to himself. He practiced the list of essentials over and over and found he had all of those. He glared at the room. He didn't trust it at all. There was something it was missing and he was sure of it. He walked out of the room and knew where to go already. 'Straight to the lab, don't ask questions' the doctor had told him. Of course he didn't ask anything, why would he? He did what he wanted and when he wanted. He arrived in the lab and looked up at the doctor, awaiting his orders.
"This should be an easy part of the day for you. You need to learn what it is like to do something with consequences. You have never felt those before, have you?" The young boy, around eight years old shook his head in the negative. The doctor then handed the boy a gun. "Shoot him" He said. Instantly a few people dragged out a man who was bound and gagged.
He didn't bother to actually aim the gun and shot the man in the shoulder. The young boy smirked at everything, including the doctor and the wounded man on the floor.
"Again, but this time, kill him" The doctor ordered. The boy looked up at him with a questioning look in his deep blue eyes.
"Why?" He asked, deliberately breaking the rule that was set for his training. He had memorized the exact words. 'Never ask questions, just accept, or decline'
"See here, boy. You have two options. You can kill this man who is innocent until proven guilty or you can say 'no'. Both of these options have consequences. Now, what is your choice?" The doctor asked, looking from the bound man, to the small boy.
"…" The boy thought about it. What did he care if the man died? Many people's blood had soiled his hands long before he met the doctor. It was no big deal to kill just one more person, innocent or not. 'Do what your heart tells you' his mind rang out. The boy handed the gun back to the doctor without saying a word.
The boy sucked in a breath as he watched the doctor point the .45 at the man on the ground.
"Now for the explanation, it is much more complex than firing a gun. You must be able to figure out what works best. Defying me of my orders is not something anyone should ever consider doing" The doctor said, smiling. "It's best to kill me before you even try it" After this simple lesson, he shot the man on the ground and looked into the young boy's eyes.
"You question me with the inevitable 'why'. I will only be nice once and tell you without punishment. It's because I ordered you to" The doctor looked over at the men who had dragged the bound man in. "You can do whatever you like to him. I want him in top physical condition. Do whatever you must to make him…perfect"
-- -- --
Around six months later the boy was finally looked over by the doctor. He had embedded many ideas and thoughts into the child's head with technology he had invented himself. The biggest problem the Doctor was having was making the boy forget what he wanted. This would get in the way with making him superior to other soldiers. He couldn't want anything from any one except orders from the Doctor himself. He had to be able to survive off of the essentials and do what he was told.
The young boy walked into the room and stood in front of the doctor, completely silent. His once bright blue eyes had turned more cold and harsh within such a short period of time. He learned quickly and that was a perfect fit for a Gundam Pilot. Perfect. This boy was the closet to perfection the professor had ever seen. His physical strength, as well as emotional were above high standards even compared to adults. 'Most adults can't even finish the six month training' the professor thought to himself.
"How do you feel?" The doctor asked him. The young boy looked at him silently for a few moments and said a dead-sounding "fine". The professor smiled at this answer and thought about how good this child was. He had dropped any of his emotional thoughts he had once had. He replaced the thoughts with something much more important, completing a mission.
"Rest, tomorrow will be a busy day" The doctor said. The young boy immediately went to his quarters. The professor watched him as he walked off, standing tall and not slacking as a usual eight year old who had been told to go to bed would.
The young boy sucked in a deep breath as he walked. The training was difficult but he had managed to find out one very important thing, what he was missing. He heard some man talking about it to someone on a telephone while he was being tested in one of his many simulation machines. He had reported to the other person that he had shown no sign of emotion at all, while everything else was normal. Emotion. That was something he lacked in. Knowing he was not supposed to lack in anything, he tried to find it. He searched in every space of his mind for the data about this…emotion.
Nothing came to his mind. He thought maybe it was something with DNA and pricked his index finger once he arrived to his quarters. Nothing showed up but a small bubble of crimson. The prick healed within the next two minutes as he stared at the blood on the tip of his finger. Obviously this was nothing, so he stuck his finger in his mouth and sucked it off. He paced around the room quite annoyed that he didn't know what emotion was.
A half hour later the boy yawned and he realized this meant he needed to sleep. He pulled off his green tank top and took off his black spandex shorts. He yawned again as he pulled on a pair of boxers that was provided for him. He put his tank top on a hanger as well as the shorts and hung them on the doorknob of his room.
"When you leave a mess, you might leave clues on accident" He recited from the doctor as he slid under the thin blanket he was given. He easily drifted off to sleep as soon as he found his favorite way to sleep, hugging his pillow and thinking of what emotion could possibly be, or even have to do with him
--
The next day he was awoken by an alarm clock at seven thirty. He knew that he had not had one when he had gone to sleep, but looked over at the noisy contraption and realized there was a note next to it. He sat up and rubbed his eyes before picked up the note and reading it. Thru his semi-blurred vision he read 'Don't move this clock or change the alarm or time. They are both perfectly set. After you wake up, go straight to the lab"
He ran his hand thru his unruly brown hair and rubbed his eyes with the back of his other hand as he stood up to go put on his clothes and get ready to meet the doctor.
He arrived at the lab at exactly 7:52 and walked over to where the doctor was sitting at his desk. He stood in front of the wooden piece of furniture and waited to be told what to do. The doctor handed him a piece of folded up paper and he took it and read. The paper explained where he was supposed to go and who he was supposed to go kill because they knew too much information about the training program that the doctor uses. The young boy handed back the piece of paper and walked out of the lab.
--
Once he was in the middle of the city he looked around for the store. When he saw the title "Anne's Floral Arrangements" he immediately set off into the store. He reached the door and pushed it open, a small bell tinkling. He walked up to the back of the small store and was only around eight inches taller than the counter. The woman in the shop looked down at him and smiled.
"How can I help you?" She asked sweetly. He looked up at her with his cold blue eyes and asked "Are you Anne?" She smiled once more "Yes, I am"
The young boy looked up at her. Even with all his training so far, he could not believe this nice middle aged woman would actually be a spy. He quickly threw the thought out of his mind and took out his gun and pointed it at her.
"W-what are you do—"She was cut off by him speaking icily.
"You are the Anne Paige that is actually a spy for some corporation. I have been sent here to make sure you do not pass on any thing more" He said, gun still aimed for her head. Her sweet smile faded into a wicked grin.
"You're a torn young boy" She said in a quiet but harsh voice, "one day you will have to choose between two loves from this, you realize"
He glared up at the lady and cocked the gun and repeated exactly what the doctor had once said "Love is just something that gets you killed"
"You will also realize that you'll be choosing between your trainer and your friends"
"Friends mean nothing. They only get in the way. They make you blind so you walk into traps and get KILLED" He sneered, shooting the woman squarely in between the eyes. She fell to the ground with a loud thud. Without even glancing at her body, he turned around and exited the store nonchalantly. He smirked as he walked back to the lab.
"Like I will ever even have friends, let alone loves" He spat out as he walked on quickly from the city. "That'll be the day"