Welcome to "Rest your bones". Before reading, please keep in mind I don't have a beta reader and I am by no means a professional writer. However, if you find yourself feeling as though I am not portraying a character correctly, do come to me about it. Nicely, of course. I enjoy constructive criticism. I also appreciate you taking time to read this. I hope you enjoy. Comment if you do!

Side note: This is set toward the middle of New Moon, after Edward left and the bond between her and Jacob had formed. In this story Renee stayed in Arizona. Why? Cuz I like Arizona =]

"It's one hundred and nine degrees

in this crowded room,

no room to breathe

with walls as cold as a gallery,

this is no place for me."

- 'Think of you' by A Fine Frenzy

Bella's POV:

"I'll see you tomorrow." I called out to Chris, a co-worker of mine, over my shoulder as I exited the diner I have been working at for two year now. Two years too long. And it never failed, that every time I hopped into Renee's Jeep, I wished for my old, beaten up, red truck. I never thought it'd be possibly for me to miss Forks, but I did. More then I could have ever imagined. Although I was confident in my reason for leaving, I had fought the urge to go back so many times in the last three years. Not only did I miss the little town and my accent truck, I missed my laid-back dad. Sure, I had grown up with my mom, and I loved having her around, but I had so much in common with Charlie and I missed the bonding.

But the one thing I missed most, was Jacob. He called me several times, every day for the entire first year after I left. He wrote me letters I never opened and just continuously shoved under my bed to avoid. I didn't want to hurt Jacob, and I knew that if I answered the phone or replied to any of his letters that I'd just make things worse and defeat the purpose of me moving back her in the first place.

Renee would beg and plead with me to "call that poor boy back" or "write him something, at least letting him know that I am alive and well", but as someone had once done for me, I wanted to make it a clean break, at least until I gathered myself and knew again what I wanted out of life. I wanted to be fair to Jacob, and back then I didn't know what fair was. So, I left. Little did I know that I'd spend three years "gathering myself".

Lately I'd pick up the phone and begin dialing Jacob's number, just to slam it down before I could finish. When I'd occasionally speak to Charlie, I'd ask about Jacob, and Jacob would in turn ask about me, but Charlie hadn't really had anything to say about Jacob in months. What if he had forgotten about me? Or moved on? I felt bad for now not knowing anything about my once-best friend.

As I pulled into the drive way of the place I now called home, I frowned. I took nothing with me from Charlie's house in Forks. Just my a few of my clothes and my laptop. I figured it was best to come here with as little as possible and start anew when I arrived. I regreted that decision now. I longed for my purple comforter, my journal, a picture of Jacob or any of my Fork friends. Well maybe not any. A picture of the Cullen's might be to painful to look at, even now. I had, however, learned to say his and his families names without wincing, over the years, and I was proud of that fact.

Now Jacob's name brought more pain then any of theirs did. Probably because I was the one to leave him and not the other way around.

I entered the air conditioned house with relief from the outside heat. I never had to worry about that in Forks. It was mostly overcast and rainy. And though I had hated that when I first arrived there, it had grown on me quickly.

"Bella?" my mom's voice called for me from another room.

"Yeah, mom?" I had called her dad for the first month or so that I was here, she never appreciated that.

"Come here for a sec." I fallowed her voice, only to find her in the kitchen, sitting on a stool, hunched over a microwaveable dinner. Her cooking was just as bad, if not worse then Charlie's.

"What's up?" I greeted her.

"How was work?" she asked, the same question she asked every day the moment I walked in.

"Same as always. I lose a little more faith in humanity everyday." I shook my head at the memory of customers from earlier that day.

"Aw, baby. Don't say that. Not everyone's that horrible."

"Nope, just the ones that come into the diner." I sighed, causing Renee to smirk. "Well, I have some news that might to cheer you up."

"What's that? Poison to slip into rude customer's food?" I joked.

"Not quite, but I know how excited you get when I say that I heard from your father." She was right, my mood was cheered almost instantly.

"Annndd?"

"And he said he wants you to call him back when you get a chance and that he misses you 'Bells'." she smiled. I bit my lip to keep it from quivering. I had never realized just how much I missed hearing my father call me Bells til now.

"Thanks." I said quickly, darting past Renee to retrieved the phone.

As soon as it was in my possession I bolted for my room, shutting the door behind me. I flopped down on the bed I've had since I was thirteen and dialed Charlie's number faster then I thought my clumsy fingers could move.

Ring one - I hope he's home.

Ring two- Maybe he's out fishing.

Ring three- Please pick up.

Ring four- "Hello?"

"Dad!" I exclaimed.

"Hey Bells, I'm so glad you called." I could hear the smile in his voice and I imagined the light wrinkles and laugh lines that appeared around it.

"How are you? How have you been?" It had only been a week since I'd last heard from him, but a week was far too long.

"I'm doing well, just got home from a very uneventful day at work. How are you? How's work been?" he asked.

"Oh same-o, same-o. Rude people, runny eggs, coming home with the fresh smell of grease and bacon on my skin and hair. You know, all that fun stuff."

Charlie chuckled, "Good to hear."

"You said work was uneventful?" I was curious about the crime rate in Forks since I had left. Uneventful only meant that Edward had always been right, I was the danger magnet. Everything bad seemed to stop when I wasn't around.

"Yeah, not even so much as an animal attack around these parts."

"Well at least that means you're safe." I smiled.

"Always am." he confirmed. "So, you been up to anything besides working, lately? Hanging out with friends at all?" I could hear slight concern in his voice.

Charlie wanted to see if maybe my life was a little better, and that my zombie days in Forks had gone since being here. He asked me this at least once every conversation and my answer was always the same, to his dismay.

"Nah, just working." I heard Charlie sigh. "I have, however, been thinking about a certain friend a lot recently. Have you happened to see or hear from Jacob at all lately?"

Charlie took in a breath. Not a good sign.

"That's actually part of the reason I called. Billy Black stopped by for a visit yesterday and he brought Jacob with him. I swear that boy gets bigger every time I see him. And his hair, it's growing out again." Charlie went on, my eyes beginning to water.

"How is he? Is he doing ok? Did he ask about me?" the words shot from my mouth faster then I could think.

"Welp, he didn't ask, but I told him I had heard from you. I think he would have asked if he didn't have a lady-friend with him."

I felt a sharp blow to my gut

. "A. ." I swallowed the building lump in my throat, "A 'lady-friend'?" I had to force it from my lips.

"Aw, Bells. I wouldn't have said anything if I had known it was going to bother you this much. Anyway, she's probably just a friend. Her name's Leah, she's Harry Clearwater's daughter. She's a nice girl, very pretty, but she isn't you." I had to commend Charlie for trying.

"Thanks dad, but it's ok." I fought to hide the apparent sadness in my voice as tears gathered in my eyes. "I'm happy for him. He's moved on and that's great. After all, I couldn't expect him to wait for me. Not after how I've treated him."

"Oh Bells. Please don't cry. I'm sorry I even mentioned it. I just thought you'd want to know. I'm so sorry, hunny." Charlie comforted me.

"It's ok. I'll be alright. And you're right. I would have wanted to know, regardless. It's fine, I promise." I tried for a smile.

"But like I said Bells, they could be just friends. I just didn't think it was my place to ask. Look, maybe you should give him a call. I am sure he'd be happy to hear from you. Girlfriend or not. You still have his number, right?"

"I do, but I think it's best to just leave it be. No sense in me popping back into his life now. I'll get over it. "

"Are you sure, Bella? I really do think you should try . ." my dad's sentence was interrupted by the sound of his doorbell ringing faintly in the background. "Op, crap. He's here early. Sorry Bells, it's Harry with some of his famous fish fry. Can I give you a call when we're threw with dinner?"

A small amount of disappointment shot through me.

"Oh, okay. Um, yeah. Call me back. Enjoy your dinner and tell Harry I said hello."

"Will do. I'll try and get something out of him about his daughter and Jacob and let you know. I'll talk to you in a bit, bye Bells."

"Thanks dad, bye." and with that I reluctantly hung up the phone.

I laid back on my bed and stared at the ceiling, my mind wondering. Envisioning my Jacob holding hands with some Native beauty. Tan skin, tall, thin, gorgeous. My stomach turned. I had always said that he deserved so much better then me and maybe he had finally found it.

I rolled over and set my cheek to the very edge of the side of my bed, feeling the coolness of the untouched fabric on my face, my watery eyes closed. I needed comforting and the person who was best at doing so was a million miles away, with some other girl probably resting her head on the spot on his shoulder that used to be for me.

Tears streamed fast down my face. Curious as to where they were landing I opened my eyes and looked to the wooden floor where peeking out, only slightly, was the tip of a white envelope. I reached out and pulled the rest of the hidden letter from under my bed, bringing it closer to my face.

The bold ink letters stared back at me, my name so far from his where it sat on the return address. I moved it toward my chest, holding the last letter Jacob ever wrote me close to my heart. I swore I could feel the warmth of his hands still on the thick paper.

I know I shouldn't read it. It would only make this sadness worse, but would it mention Leah? I found myself itching to know. Had he ended his letters with finality? Or one day just decide to stop writing?

I looked at the intimidating piece of stationary and debating opening it. If I opened this one, I knew I'd end up opening the rest. And was I really ready for that? I had spent all these years winning over temptation to peek inside each one. Was I ready now to just let that all go to waste?

But deep down inside, more then anything, I wanted to know. . needed to know what he had said to me. Maybe reading these would make it easier to let him go? Or harder. Who was I kidding, it didn't matter now.

My finger found it's way into the envelope, quickly yanking one long rip in the fold of the paper, removing the sloppily folded letter slowly, careful not to tear it. As I eyed the heavily creased paper, certain words popped out at me.

Don't read it, Isabella. You'll regret it, I said to myself. But I was to far gone.

I began reading:

Dear Bella,

I've written you fifty-two letters, called you several times a day in the past year and have gotten nothing in return. You win, I give up. I can't keep caring and waiting on you and be expected to live a normal life. So, consider this my last letter. I won't call or write to you anymore. From now on I'm going to leave you alone to go about your business. If you never return to Forks, I wish you well in life and hope that you find something along the road that makes you happy, because obviously that something wasn't me. Take care of yourself, Bella.

-Jacob

I could feel the long forgotten hole in my chest, begin to reopen as I began to sob. The words he wrote were so harsh, to final, but could I blame him? His hand writing was so bold, etched into the paper with frustration. I felt so terrible.

Immediately I bent over to reach under my bed, using both hands to retrieve two large handfuls of unread letters. I thumbed through the load determined to find the first one he sent, wanting to read them all in chronological order. As soon as I found it, I ripped it open and began reading.

An hour and a half had passed and I had read every letter in the pile. My mind now flooded with news, gossip and the pain Jacob had described in each letter. The hole in my chest had stretched to almost an unbearable size, my eyes blinded by tears.

How could I have done that to Jacob? I never knew I had hurt him as much as he had written on each page. I realized then that I had done to him as Edward had done to me. I had become Edward. I knew what if felt like to be Jacob, and I was the one who had made him feel that way. How could I?

Suddenly I had a confidence in me I never felt before. I had to contact Jacob. There were no if's and's or but's, I had to hear his thick, husky voice. I had to tell him how sorry I was. He had to know.

Before I knew it the phone was yet again in my palm, the feeling of sweat filled my hand. I hesitated as I always had before, watching the numbers as though they'd dial themselves. I hovered my thumb over the "talk" button, betting years would pass before it touched down onto it. But before my skin could reach the plastic the phone rang, startling me.

The caller ID read: "Charlie Swan". I quickly answered.

"Hey Dad." It came out rushed, but I knew what I was about to do.

"Hey Bells, something wrong?" Charlie sounded really concerned.

"No, nothing wrong, but I have a sort of surprise." I had finally decided on something I had wanted to do for years.

"What's that, dear?", curiosity thick in his words.

"Well, I'm sorry it's taken me so long to do this, but. ." I paused, making sure I was stil breathing, I had lost track.

"But what, Bells? Is everything ok?"

"Dad, I'm coming home."