DisclaimerXx attack on titan and Naruto don't belong to me (unfortunately)

The first true memories that I have are of pain.

Excruciating

Intolerable

Agony

Discomfort

Misery

Torment

Anguish

Trapped

Powerless

Empty

Or just simply pain (so, so much pain)

The words I learnt later but back then, that was my life. I knew nothing else, I didn't know there was an alternative or even a world outside of sterile steel walls. I didn't know that what was happening to me was considered a, sin. That the people who were doing this to me were actually in the wrong. No. I didn't and wasn't able or ever given the chance to learn about the outside (as I would come to call it)

My second most deeply set memory would have to be HIM. Looming over me with his sly smirk and murky golden eyes, with his obsession with snakes and blood.

OROCHIMARU.

He was, to me at least, the bogeyman hiding behind me, stalking me and laying in wait for that one moment of weakness. Orochimaru was the one to perform the tests on me, the one to dig his scalpel into my skin even as I writhed and struggled and screamed. He was the one to give me my eye. (His laugh haunts my nightmares even now)

Gradually though more experiments trickled in and with them came knowledge.

Titans,

Scouting legion,

The walls,

It was (to me at least) overwhelming. And looking back I can easily see why. I was a child, five years old and learning just then that everything I knew was a lie. I began the process of closing myself off, becoming cold and seemingly arrogant to those around me, killing the other test subjects (fancy names for human tests that went wrong) that they made me fight with no emotion and no hesitation or regret. (In all actuality every night I would pray, to no real god (there was no god or he would be merciful upon us and let us live a small voice in my head had always whispered) to allow them to be free and without pain)

When it reached me that the military police were invading the underground fortress I was beyond elated, I was so relieved and yet anxious. This was our chance, to escape, to be free. And I wanted it so damn much. It was with bated breath that I crouched, waiting, within my cell even as the footsteps drew closer. When I saw the green horse splayed proudly upon the man's shoulder I felt almost immediate relief, we were going to be saved! We had a chance at salvation!

I should have known how hollow this salvation was to be.

At my sudden intake of breath the man quickly swung around simultaneously breaking me from my own musing. I stood and stepped closer to the bars making sure that the long strip of cloth serving as an eyepatch was firmly covering my right eye (I didn't want him to think of me as a monster after all) and gave him a level stare. He returned it for a couple of seconds before calling out to his apparent comrade.

"Hey Eric, there's another freak down here! Get your arse down so we can chuck her out," he chuckled as though finding something funny even as I stumbled back so I was against the wall.

Freak.

Is that what these people of the outside though of me? Is this who I would be from now? Just the freak? My thoughts whirled and buzzed, even as I slipped to my knees and bit my lip. I was devastated.

My first actual view of the outside wasn't particularly nice. It basically consisted of me being thrown clear of the base into an alleyway even as the men nonchalantly continued their work in looking for 'clues' (basically it was them openly displaying their greed and searching high and low for money) I was both shocked and appalled. And at that moment I swore to myself never to lose myself to greed or join the military police. They gave me nothing I would give nothing back. After that I disappeared further into the darkness of the alleyway.

I met Mei Ackerman purely by accident. I was ten years old and had just been the victor of a small gang fight, the area I left was NOT a pretty sight however I had not got out unscathed. No, I was sporting a large knife wound to my lower abdomen and could feel the blood seeping past my fingers even as I held it tight. I remember laughing at the sheer irony of the situation. I had survived experiment after experiment and had lived on the streets with no prior experience to life outside for two and a half years (from seven and a half to ten) and the thing that took me down was a knife wound!? I began to feel dizzy and nauseated all at once, leaning heavily on my side. Suddenly I stumbled into a woman with straight black shoulder length hair (noting briefly that she was looking at me with shock)

And promptly threw up over her shoes.

It was not the best meeting as I passed out soon after vomiting my metaphorical guts. (Although I was told later that she had only shook her head laughed and hoisted me up before carrying me all the way back to her house) but she was nothing except kind toward me. Apparently I held a great resemblance towards my deceased mother (who alongside my father I remembered nothing of) never mind my hair being the opposite colour causing the shock I had briefly seen upon her face. Afterwards she had insisted on taking me in (I was honestly so, so shocked) and had introduced me to her husband, Izuma, and her seven year old daughter, Mikasa, they had both welcomed me with wide arms and somehow as we sat at the dinner table engaging in light chatter and talk I felt like I was at last.

Home.

I told Mai of the inside(I had come (for some reason) to start calling the scientists abode this) and she had openly wept for me, making me incredibly uncomfortable, she in return had explained as to why the orientals were often hunted and used as slaves and workers, it disgusted me and gave me yet another reason as to why I despised the rich. I also explained to her of my budding interest in joining the survey corps and whilst she had issues about it("Naruto there is a large possibility that you will die" "I know Mai-san, I know") she understood and supported me, giving me a warm fuzzy feeling that I treasured. Mai also began teaching me Japanese which I was quickly able to pick up.

The peace lasted a year and no longer.

this chapter is basically a short introduction and build up, explaining somethings that shall be explored further later on. It's pretty short I guess. I don't think that anymore of the story will be in first person pov like this but if you really liked it request and I will see what I can do. Hope you like it

Wingedsilverfang ~

Ja ne