Winter 1863
Adam sat beside his brother's bedside. Joe was so very sick and it hadn't been anyone's fault but his own. He had set out on a mountain hunting trip a week ago. He was supposed to be gone only a few days and was supposed to come home with a covey of pheasants and a brace of coneys. He hadn't shown up and that had upset the other Cartwrights.
So Hoss had gone after him.
After three days of waiting, Hoss had returned with Joe wrapped in his heavy coat. His lips were nearly blue and he had a nasty cut on his head. Hoss said he had found him at the base of a cliff in a pool of blood. None of them would know what had happened until Joe was feeling better.
The doctor had been summoned and took a good long look at Joe while they waited downstairs. Adam had paced the floor in front of the fire he was that worried. Even though Joe got on his nerves, he was still his brother and no matter what went on, he would always care for his brother.
The doctor had come down and said Joe was suffering from hypothermia and a severe case of it. The cut on his forehead hadn't helped either. In fact, it made it even worse because the blood loss made him chill up faster. He was going to go through the ringer before he got better and then there was the chance he would never get better.
When he was able to, Adam had gone up to Joe's room and hadn't come out. He was determined to be there when his brother woke up.
It reminded him of a year ago when he accidently shot Joe on a wolf hunt. It had nearly killed him to watch his brother suffer for his mistake. Luckily, Joe had made it out alive.
That had been one time and Joe hadn't been suffering from hypothermia. A bullet wound is one thing and hypothermia is another. Although both are dangerous, one can be easily dealt with than the other.
Adam took his brother's hand. It was as if ice had settled into his veins and was freezing its way through his system. This was ridiculous. He should have at least gone with him to make sure he was okay.
He heard the door open but refused to look.
"Adam, there's no use blaming yourself. It was an accident." Ben said softly.
"I should have gone with him, Pa. He's my little brother and I should have made sure he was okay." Adam replied hoarsely. He wasn't sure how many times he'd cried silently in this room alone with no one but possibly Little Joe to hear.
"He wanted to go on his own and we let him. There was nothing you could have done even if you did go. Those hills are icy this time of year. I would have had both of you laid up in bed if you had gone with him."
Adam shook his head and looked at his feet. There was no one who was going to persuade him any different that he wasn't responsible for his little brother. Joe had told HIM he was going hunting and that he'd be home in a week. That meant he, as in Adam, was in charge of making certain his brother was brought home in one piece. Well, he had come home in one piece and it was almost a frozen piece.
"Adam, you have to listen to me, son." Ben said as he placed his hands on his oldest son's shoulders. "Joe went on that hunting trip alone with the fun intention of coming back. He was met with a freak accident. That's all. None of this was your fault."
"It was, Pa." He let Joe's hand drop back to his bed as he stood up and walked to the window. "He told me he was going hunting. That meant it was my responsibility to watch out for him. I should have gone with him up that mountain and made sure he was at least safe."
"It couldn't be helped. He wanted to go alone. He had been cooped up for two months and needed to get out on his own."
"One of us still should have gone."
"Adam." Ben sighed, trying his best to remain calm so he didn't rile his already upset son. "Adam, we didn't go. We have to accept that. Now all we can do is sit and wait until he gets better."
"You go on back to work. I'll stay here with him." Ben, not wanting to argue any longer with a son who blamed himself for his brother's accident, didn't say a word as he walked out the door.
Adam sighed and leaned his forehead against the window. This wasn't going to be a good thing he was about to do. Staying in this room was bound to upset him even more. Little Joe was sick and not going to get any better any time soon.
He turned and sat down. Taking a rag from the warm water he had sitting on Joe's beside table, he rubbed his brother's forehead with the warm water. Joe was still clammy but now he was burning up since his fever set in. Adam transferred the rag to the cool water and began to douse his younger brother in cold water.
"I'm so sorry, Joe. I should have gone with you up on that mountain. If I had, you wouldn't be where you are now." When his brother didn't answer, which he knew he wasn't going to, he leaned back in his chair and picked up the book he had abandoned. Thinking about it, he took Joe's hand and held it while he read.
THREE DAYS LATER
Adam woke up to someone poking his shoulder. He groaned groggily and shook his head. Someone poked him again. He lifted his head.
"Adam, you're heavy." Whoever it was said tiredly. The oldest Cartwright son sat up suddenly and looked down. Joe was awake and looking at him through half-lidded eyes. He smiled when his brother looked down at him. "Hey, there we are. I thought you were going to take my arm off."
"You're awake." Adam whispered.
"Yeah. I'm awake. How long have I been out?"
"A little over a week. You were suffering from hypothermia. How did you fall?"
"I was leading Cochise down the mountain. He sidestepped the slick spot and as we were going over the next one, I slipped and took a nice tumble down the hill. I must have cracked my head because I woke with blood on the snow before I passed out again. How did I get back here?"
"Hoss went in search for you. He found you and Cochise at the base of mountain. When he went up, he found you a few feet from your horse. You were in a pool of blood and as Hoss looked, you had a bad cut on your head."
"Yeah, I feel it. Where are Pa and Hoss?"
"They're downstairs. I'll go get them." Joe nodded as his brother walked out the door. "Pa, Joe's awake!"
Ben and Hoss came running upstairs. Adam leaned against the wall as he heard his family talking. It made him feel good to know that they were now all well, especially Little Joe. He didn't know what he would do if something happened to Joe.
