Title: Hand of Sorrow
Pairing: Ichigo x Toshiro
Summary: Despair, sadness and darkness are all what they could see. All the misfortune caused by the hand of sorrow: fate.
DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN BLEACH. THIS IS JUST A FANFIC.
Chapter 1: Black Tragedy
"Where... where am I?" he questioned himself, his eyes blinking open.
"You're in the Fourth Division Barracks. You're currently under treatment right now." a youth with raven hair answered with a nervous voice.
Toshiro wanted to move, but his limbless parts are stopping him. Without his other arm and leg, he couldn't move free.
"You passed out and you have been asleep for the whole time. It has been already nearly a week." Hanatarou handed over to the Captain a glass of clear water along with a blue capsule. "Sorry. You've been out for a while and I know that you're wounds still painful." he explained.
"A painkiller?" Toshiro grunted as he took the pill onto his small hand then swallowing it before Hanatarou placed the glass onto his mouth for him to drink the water. It's been a week after a war. And the last time he was awake was when he heard that they won. He was very grateful to Ichigo for that.
"It's been almost a month now Captain Hitsugaya, yet you aren't making any improvements with your condition." Unohana said. "It's odd that my Minazuki's healing powers are not having any effect on your injuries. Healing Kido didn't work either. Even Inoue Orihime's powers were null. And due to your absence the Tenth Division is in havoc." She looked at him with concern.
"I get it. My condition is complicated." he said in an irritated manner, looking at the window where he could see a lot of Seireitei.
"Sorry for the sudden intrusion, there is something important that I have to say to you." she gently apologized.
Toshiro turned to the female Captain. "How is Matsumoto and Hinamori? Are they alright?" he asked with anxiety, now is the only time he asked that because he was being treated for so long that he never found the right time.
Unohana stayed quiet and did not answer him. Her face turned kind of sad and she lowered her head.
"Is there anything wrong?" He became suspicious by the expression she showed, which hinted that what she's going to say won't be pleasant.
"That is what I have to tell you, though you might not like it."
"What do you mean?" he answered back. Her hands were trembling slightly and her eyes were shadowed, it arose his suspicion.
She answered him gravely and slowly, "Lieutenant Hinamori did not make it. She died recently from her injuries. As for Lieutenant Matsumoto, she is in a comatose state, most likely from a traumatic experience of shock; and it's permanent. I'm sorry about their demise, Captain Hitsugaya."
"What?" Toshiro replied in a voice that is as silent as the wind but as sharp as a knife.
And at that second, his eyes went blank like he is lifeless, and he was trembling with great terror and rage, his greatly saddened self causing him to cry in pain. Unohana expected this, so she quickly chanted a binding Kido. "Bakudo #61: Rikujokoro."
Right at the second when all the six beams of light bind him, he started screaming and struggled to break free of the spell, and more Shinigami from the Fourth Division entered the room and restrained him, and no matter how many sedatives they tried injecting him the effects were null.
"Stand back a bit, everyone." Unohana ordered them politely, pointing her index finger at the berserk Captain. They all stepped back a few feet away and she chanted an offensive Kido, "Hado #1: Sho." The small force hit his forehead and it made him lose consciousness, but not all of them.
And suddenly, his temperature rose ten degrees in an instant, and his body started shaking like a violent earthquake. Blood and saliva poured from his mouth like a leaking water can, and non-emotional tears flowed from his eyes as if it's a water fountain.
"Everyone, restrain him. I'll go operate on him right away."
They were quick in holding him down despite his violent strength and Unohana was only an inch beside his bed in no time. As he lost his remaining consciousness, the last things he heard were, "This will take a long time to finish but please bear with it. We'll find a way somehow."
Toshiro woke up from a horrible nightmare, removing the white blanket covering him. He panted heavily from the shock of the dream and he sighed that it was just a dream. Then he took a look at the surrounding and quickly realized that he was still in the hospital and his hair was kind of longer than his normal.
"Are you finally awake, Captain Hitsugaya?"
He turned to the door and saw Unohana standing by the wall, her face kind of melancholic. "Just what happened? Why am I still here? The last thing I remember was..." He widened his eyes and gasped when he recalled the things that occurred the last time he was awake. "I was..."
"You might not believe for what I will say to you, but actually it's been nearly a year since the last time you were awake. In other words you lost consciousness for a long time and you only woke up this evening."
This shocked him that it has been that long already and her words rang many bells in Toshiro's mind, because there are new scars and bandages on him. His Reiatsu also kept on leaking out on him without any control.
"And there's more." Unohana snapped Toshiro out of his confusion. "Whenever we perform check-ups on you, we see your Reiatsu terminating some of your body cells. Your Zanpakutou's powers keeps hindering your condition from getting better. We could have your arm and leg restored before but your powers are stopping us and your own body from doing so. And sometimes your Reiatsu eats at you."
Toshiro was shocked that his own power was hurting him himself without him knowing it.
"You feel less energized than usual, right?" the Captain asked him for him to see for himself and when Toshiro checked his own state right now, he realized she was right and his skin is pale and there wasn't much vitality in him anymore. It reminded him of when his Reiatsu was making his grandmother suffer.
Toshiro held his head with his remaining hand in pain as his Reiatsu started attacking him again. Unohana did not waste another second to lessen the hurt and after a minute or two, the pain was gone again but Toshiro was exhausted from fighting it. He had not much stamina in him anymore. He also does not have much endurance unlike back then, but it still was enough to keep him alive.
"Captain Hitsugaya, we have been thinking about this with my subordinates and the other Captains but if this goes on you will die." Unohana said, turning graver than the last time she was in front of the prodigy.
"Then?" Toshiro knew that there was something else aside from that, but he can't guess what. His mind was too clouded right now.
Unohana like before said nothing for a while like a long pause and then she finally managed to say the last words though she looked and sounded really distraught from what she said.
"We have no choice but to remove your powers and your Zanpakutou. This may also mean that you will be no longer a Shinigami and that you will be a human for the rest of your life, but you have to sacrifice your powers if you want to live and regain your limbs. That's the only way you can be able to survive."
Toshiro did not make any reaction but it is obvious that he was very shocked, because that was a huge decision. For a long time both Captains remained silent, and finally after thinking with very sad but determined feelings, Toshiro made up his choice.
"I'll do it."
Unohana felt pity for him and her eyes turned sad. Toshiro looked away from her and rested his head on his hands, embittered by all the bad news that he received from her, the news from a few months ago and from today. Unohana tried to make things a little less pressured by assuring, "Don't worry, Captain Hitsugaya. We are not going to do it right away. You can rest for one more day here and we will start after that time."
Toshiro did not say anything, only giving one small nod before falling back to the bed.
She politely took her leave right after and Toshiro is alone now in the hospital room, still awake and looking at no where else but the window. Even though the place looked the same, the prodigy could sense that there were so many changes in the whole place.
He remembered Ichigo, who he was thankful to for ending the war. Then he remembered Hinamori and Matsumoto, he was curious even if it was painful: Exactly how did the peach die? Why did his now ex-Lieutenant lose consciousness of her whole body and her mind?
The questions keep on echoing in his head, his right arm reaching out for the moon that was at the center of the view from the window. When it looked like it was within his grasp, he clenched his fist. He sighed as he dropped his arm.
"I wonder, why did they have to die and suffer eternal pain? Unlike me, I just have to give up something and then I'll be able to live on till death. That's unfair. I should have died with them. I lost everything now. Fate is never kind, is it? And I guess, miracles don't exist. God, why did things turn out like this?" he spoke in his mind.
His face was sad for only a moment after reminiscing about their demise, but he quickly turned back to his emotionless expression, changing his gaze from the window to the ceiling, trying to make himself fall asleep.
The next thing that happened the surgery started after a long day of rest, and the Fourth Division was operating on him, gradually removing his powers. He was half-conscious, watching the whole thing being performed on him. Instead of feeling pain, he got better as more Reiatsu were removed from him. It was a tragedy, to lose a Captain not from death but from something else. The more he lost, the better his condition got but the whole surrounding began to look very hazy.
"I guess this is it." he thought, his vision slowly turning into black. There were many words in his mind all in the form of a sad farewell.
"Hyourinmaru, I know you're upset. I've been your master for a hundred years now, so it is also a pain for me. But I hope you find a better master who will be able to master you and protect the people important to him or her. Even if I no longer wield you, I'm glad that I was your master and I'll never forget you. Grandma, I'm sorry that I wasn't able to protect Hinamori. I promised to never let her get harmed but I failed and she died. Goodbye and I bid you a good and peaceful life without me."
Farewell, everyone.
Toshiro woke up his vision turning clearer by the second. He saw that the whole place was not the hospital anymore. He realized he was in the Real World. And all his bandages and injuries were gone, he felt very energized and his left arm and leg were back completely without a single scratch. He could move his body freely. He saw something shining from his middle finger and draw his hand closer to see. It was a ring and it looked like the guard of Hyourinmaru. He tried taking it off but it was stuck.
"Where am I?"
Right when he asked himself, a door slowly opened and a figure went inside slowly.
Toshiro did not recognize the person at first but after looking a bit more he was surprised. Instead of orange hair, it was black and it was longer than the last time he saw the person. He also was really taller and his eyes were silver-red, not brown. His expression also was completely different; he was completely calm and unfazed.
"You're Kurosaki." he muttered and Ichigo agreed with him. "You know about all of this?" was Toshiro's next question, and Ichigo agreed. "I was told about it a day ago by Urahara. And well the surgery did work. You're now a human and I can't sense any trace of spirit energy in you."
Toshiro understood and fell back on Ichigo's bed and the latter walked out the room quickly after telling the boy to take another rest. He rested with a bitter face and heart; the day passed with great silence.