Forasmuch as it hath pleased Almighty God of his great mercy to take unto himself the soul of our dear brother here departed,
we therefore commit his body to the ground;
earth to earth,
ashes to ashes,
dust to dust;
She was an absent bystander with vacant eyes and a buzzing head the day of her mother's funeral.
Her "crybaby" eyes were gone now thanks to one of her older cousins who held the ten year old down despite her wriggling .
"Your mama would no like," thirteen Esmeralda Vasquez said to her sniffling cousin. "No more cry baby eyes,si?"
On a normal day, she would have slapped her cousins face and hissed out a swear word at Esmeralda.
She had no fight left within her to even throw a saucy retort about her cousin's "wrong-sounding" English.
On a normal day, her mother would have scolded her about using swear words at the age of ten and cursed her father for using them so much around her.
OHHH, so you're just letting your daughter call people putas and cabrons?
How fierce her dark eyes would have narrowed at him.
But, she did not hear her mother's voice or nor did she hear her quick footsteps.
It wasn't a normal day because her mother was gone now.
Aressa Delko was tired of standing at that grave site.
Her head had taken on the weight of the headstone that she stared so blankly at.
She couldn't bare to look at the box.
The pine box that signified her mother's end .
'Damned stupid box.'she thought. She shivered .Her father sensed that and held her closer.
Eric probably thought she was just cold. But, in fact the shivering came from the curse word.
'God Damn stupid box.' she thought again.
She looked up at her daddy. He could always seemed to read her thoughts.
But,he seemed to be in his own private world.
He didn't cry.
He never did.
He looked bravely at that stupid box.
Aressa thought he was the bravest daddy in the he didn't cry, then Aressa wouldn't cry. They were two peas in a pod now.
Not, the three musketeers anymore because her mama was gone.
She just hoped he didn't hate her now because she made her mama die.
The wind this time drew her closer to her father. A slight cry escaped her lips.
The wind whipped against her legs . It was probably God punishing her for saying all those bad words in her head.
She whispered a soft apology to HIM in spanish, so HE wouldn't be mad enough at her to take her daddy too.
She looked at the headstone again and read the words again.
'Here lies Terri Cruz'
Funny, how her mother and father had been together ever since she was born that they had never been were engaged to be married later that year.
'Here lies Terri Cruz'
Mother
Aressa wondered if her daddy would try to get her a new mother now?
'Here lies Terri Cruz'
Mother
Fiancee
Would he get married someone else again? The thought made her want to stomp into a fit .She didn't want anyone else in their house and on her mother's side of the bed!
'Here lies Terri Cruz'
Mother
Fiancee
Daughter
Aressa had forgotten she even had other grandparents. They didn't show didn't like her anymore after she had Aressa with her daddy young. None of her family showed up except for her two brothers.
'Here lies Terri Cruz'
Mother
Fiancee
Daughter
Sister
She looked around the gravesite for those nice uncles she had met just two days ago. She quickly spotted them near the front left..near the stupid box.
She froze.
'HereliesTerriCruzMotherFianceeDaughterSisterLovedbyGod'
She couldn't even looked back at her safe place. Her eyes were glued on that pine box that began to lower into the ground. Why did it suddenly get so hot on a cold day?
She looked up at the shining,bright sky.
Had the sun been shining this whole time? Why was she so cold a few minutes ago?
'What's wrong with me?'she thought.
Hysteria began to fill her lungs as if it was water.
"What's wrong with her?"
"Dios mios!Will someone help that child?"
Aressa didn't realize she was saying "damned stupid box" over and over again until a long while later when her abuela mentioned it years later.
And she laughed.
For no, one whipped or scolded her this time for saying a bad word.
She laughed because everyone else must have thought it was a "damned stupid box too". She cursed that box to hell before everything went black and the visions of the night her mother was killed ceased.
For three years, she didn't think about that night her mother went to Seven-Eleven after she bugged her repeatedly for oreos.
For three years, she suppressed the memory of what happened that night in the parking lot .
For three years, Aressa Delko did not talk about her or anything else because for three years…
Aressa Delko did not speak at all after that day at her mother's funeral.